Carmine

We lumbered past the fields into a town I once ruled over. If there were any expectations of seeing Artus’s disconcerting frown, it died with the leaves. Specks of fire stewed off those leaves and the dust settled under my slowing run into the devastated town.

Cries of my name blasted into the hot air, but they suffocated under the loud scream echoing in my head. It never exited my lips, for I resembled a fool with no agency to speak.

The warm assault on my nose petrified me. My body rocked under the stark weight of pain in the pit of my chest. It swelled and rumbled me to the core.

A revolting feeling that chased the curtails of my fury.

Broken barks came off the destroyed walls. The earth was clad with a chaotic array of clothing. Among the clothing, there laid bodies, that would never rise in the morning. Slumbering embers going into the dreary night, Five never hesitated to do anything I asked.

When I told Five we would pass through here to get supplies, he cautioned me against it a little too strongly.

Five knew and now he was behind me. He and the rest of them and I already imagined their thoughts. I predicted the words slipping off their lips.

My head turned towards the Artus’s hut. I took measured steps around the debris, navigating the unmoving hands and horrified bloodied faces, until I reached the hut’s door. My feet planted in between a man’s splayed arm, and another man’s legs. A splash of dried blood coated the front.

Pushing that door aside carefully, I came inside and within some measure of time saw Artus’s wives. The positioning of their bodies and craned necks with eyes widened in horror unnerved me. I turned and reached into Valor’s unmoving body at the door.

Our eyes connected, but for the sanctity of love, he looked away. I knew what he wanted to say. My wish begged him to say it, and I would hate him if he had.

He moved, allowing me passage.

My body tensed as my throat contracted. I closed my eyes, easing my tense breathing.

I traversed to the center of the town to see Janilla vomiting, stooped over, her figure convulsed to the rhythm of the shaking tree limbs. Sandream stared down at her with a blank stare.

Janilla kept her gaze on the ground, yet she shuddered with fear. I opened my lips, but I noted Five coming towards me. “Don’t ask me,” Five said.

My eyes squinted in annoyance, while I fought back the bile gathering up in my throat. “I never asked you yet.”

“I understand your pride implores you to want to know the fate of that boy with the wooden sword.”

Pride, was that it? My throat contracted more as the weight of this tragedy shook my bones.

Stow my pride.

“And?”

“Dead.”

My eyes closed as I swallowed a buildup of saliva.

Five said, “Artus’s body has been found, all the other people here are dead, except one.”

I looked up at him. “Who?”

Five replied, “A woman close to death.”

“Ah.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. The turmoil I walked into and survived by the skin of my teeth.

Janilla tried standing. She almost fell back. Sandream shifted behind her and kept her from falling.

Janilla stared at me. I said, “Sandream take Janilla out of here.”

Janilla brightened up with a smile and said, “No, no, I am fi—“

“Silence, I beckoned an order. You will leave with Sandream immediately.”

Janilla softened and nodded her head with sadness. Sandream led Janilla out into the forest.

I asked, “Is she savable?”

Five stared right through me. “No.”

Uncertainty lingered long enough to pity any attempt at truth. Not in this case, at least I knew what needed to be done. “Five take out the pills.”

Valor’s eyebrows raised in reaction to that. Five led the way and we followed.

The woman laid under a mass of scorched wood. Her condition was deplorable, what was left of her was burnt flesh.

I surveyed her from head to toe and felt the bile building at the back of my throat. Five was right and it angered me. Her eyes moved in my direction, I heard gasps.

I laid my palm out and Five dispensed the pills in my hand. My hand grasped her forehead. Gentle whispers escaped my sinful lips guiding her to sleep. She shivered under my touch.

I waved my hand over her face. “I will end the pain.” My hand motioned the pill over her lips. Her lips puckered up.

I gave her the first and kept going until Valor spoke. That will be enough Carmine.

She took the rest, swallowing with her remaining strength.

From the exposed bones to the flayed skin, I struggled not to stare, I fought the urge to kneel over in what remained of my dead emotions.

Slim tears flowed down her dirt-filled cheeks. I wiped it clear and sat there. “Leave me,” I said.

Valor’s voice came roughly, “Carmine—”

“I said leave me.”

Their feet crunched into the cruel earth and became whispers.

She continued shaking. I never knew how much time passed, but I assumed no pain consumed her. My hope for a painless death sickened me.

Her arm shifted up, her fingers flexed and moved. I knew nothing about her.

She was dying, but I grabbed her hand and we laid there looking up into the sky.

Her fingers got strong all of a sudden but slacked in the next instance. I twisted my lips and nodded before looking down. No motion resided in her eyes, or her body.

Silence permeated and fear gripped my bones. My palm lightly brushed her eyes closed.

I sat there waiting for the encroaching darkness to take me, to punish me, yet nothing happened.

I prevented the disaster of shame that came with losing my composure. No vomit would exit my lips again. I seen this before, so it was nothing special. Damnation, it was too common for me to debase myself any further.

I planted my hand on my chest and breathed in to push down the bile and sickness.

My tired legs carried me out of the town to meet up with the others. No words were said, instead we gave each other nervous glances. We shipped on like it was another day in our lives. A day layered in the iniquity of my life.