Child of Thorns - A Pokemon Sinnoh Reimagining

Throughout the following months, Shadi did as usual, trying her best to stay out of everyone's way.

It wasn't out of consideration for the people around her. She'd just come to learn that the best way for people to leave her alone was to never speak or look at them, to keep her head low and cause as little trouble as possible. It was a win/win for everyone involved, really. From a young age, she'd realized that she didn't enjoy social interactions the same way most people did, and the few times she'd brought the topic up or tried to explain herself, it ended with either mockery or confusion. Or even worse, condescension, like when she'd told Johanna.

'There's no need to worry honey, you're still young. I'm sure you'll someday find people you want to spend your time with. It's not good to be by yourself too much.'

That was the first and last time she'd ever confided in her mother about anything.

Venomous anger rose to her throat every time she remembered those words. They'd been spoken in the same tone as when a parent told their rebelling kid that they were just 'going through a phase'. The idea turned her mind bitter every time she considered it, more so because part of her feared it might be true.

But if this really was just a phase, then it meant what she felt now was wrong, unnatural. It was something she'd have to grow out of. She didn't want to. Every time she forced herself to be more sociable and emotionally open, it ended in disaster, and the few times it didn't weren't that great anyway. Was it really so bad to be like her?

It's not like she was an asocial hermit. She had… what one could call friends, more online than not, but still. People she talked to on a daily basis, if only for short bursts. Interesting discussions, jokes and banter, ideas and advice, they were all there for whenever she wanted to partake in them. They weren't forced on her. She was honestly happy by herself most of the time, and in the rare occasion she wished for another's company, it would be readily available. To her, that was ideal. It's what made her happy.

And yet time and time again, she'd been told that it was wrong. That she was wrong. Almost all her real life friendships and a few of her online ones had gone sour because no matter how honest she was about it, the fact that she only replied to texts or agreed to hang out when she felt like it –which was very occasionally– put too great a strain in her relationships. More often than not, her friends thought she hated them. In their eyes, why would they bother if, nine times out of ten, she declined their company when it was offered?

It was a… sour feeling, she had to admit. The more it happened, the less she was willing to open up, and the less likely it was that she would find someone who was okay with… who she was. With the apparently wrong and twisted way in which she loved.

But it was okay. As long as she had herself, it was nothing but an annoyance. And herself was the one thing she would let no one take away from her. If others saw her as obscene, then she would not let them see her. She would keep to herself.

Of course… sometimes it wasn't as easy as it sounded.

That school day had been going well so far, which for Shadi meant that no one had tried to talk to her. She sat on her chair near the front of the class, leaning against the wall and reading a book she'd brought for the self-study period. It was fifteen minutes until five when the bell rang, and she was only a couple pages from the end of the chapter.

Chatter rang out throughout the room. For most of her classmates, the self-study period was the perfect excuse to laze around and chat amongst themselves. And even Shadi, as studious as she was, preferred to use that half an hour to catch up on some novels. In the desk in front of her, a girl named Reina followed her example, though she'd chosen a romance novel instead of a mystery one like her.

Reina was the only person in her class she liked. She wasn't sure if they could be called friends; in some ways they were more than that, and in some ways less. Reina didn't bother her, and vice versa. They chatted amiably when needed, offered each other help and advice once in a while and kept each other company in various ways when Shadi was willing. Either because Reina was shy or simply understanding of her nature, she never asked for more than Shadi was willing to give. And because the two of them were relatively lonely after she'd had a fight with her previous friend, they were naturally drawn to each other.

It'd gotten to the point where, once or twice, Shadi had actively sought out her company, which was rare. The comfortable silence between them was one she enjoyed.

And, of course, just like with every other minuscule speck of enjoyment she'd found in this shithole of a school, someone had to come and ruin it.

"Dawn? Hey, Dawn, I need a word with you."

Shadi's brow immediately furrowed, as though sensing an incoming headache. And she was so close to finishing the chapter, too. With a sigh, she closed the book and looked at Reina for a moment, who seemed to share in her irritation. Then, she stood up from her desk and turned toward the source of that voice.

A barely disguised smile formed on the other girl's lips… Sol, she was pretty sure her name was. She was much taller and imposing than Shadi. And if she remembered correctly, she was the star player in their school's volleyball team. Normally, she wouldn't have cared to remember such a detail, but Sol happened to be the friend Reina didn't speak with anymore, for some reason.

Shadi looked over the girl's shoulder to the back of the classroom. A group of girls sat together opposite to them, very badly disguising the fact that they were listening in on their conversation. They smiled expectantly, letting out small giggles now and then. Every single one of those girls had tried messing with her at one point or another, and they'd all been given a taste of their own medicine. They were clearly still bitter about that.

I get it, she thought. Sol is the new girl in the group. They sent her to me so I'd chew her out like I did them. An initiation of sorts… how twisted.

"What is it?" she asked, flatly.

Sol folded her arms. "What kinda greeting is that? Smile at least."

"I'm sure it'll be quicker for both of us if you just tell me what you want," she replied curtly. "So?"

"…Hmph." Sol realized she wouldn't get her to budge, so she decided to move on. "That's what I wanted to talk about. We were talking and discussing with the girls and a few of the teachers about you, Dawn…"

"Were you, now? To think I'd be so popular without even trying."

"…and that attitude of yours came up a few times," Sol finished, frowning. "We were thinking if you're really showing the kinda class spirit you ought to."

Shadi raised an eyebrow, a smile quirking up her lips. "Ought to?"

"The headmistress told us on our first year, and the teachers are always repeating it. All the classes should be like family," said Sol, without a hint of irony or self-awareness. "And me and a few of our classmates are thinking you're not meeting us halfway when it comes to that."

Shadi wanted to laugh, she really did, but the sound didn't left her mouth. It was blocked by something sour, solid.

She wasn't meeting them halfway? Yeah, maybe because every time she'd tried, they'd taken a step back so she'd have to overextend even more. What a bunch of fucking hypocrites. They didn't care at all about the class' unity or image, they just wanted to use that excuse to torment her.

"…I'm raising the average grade of this class by two points all by myself, and half a point for the entirety of the school," Shadi replied coldly. "I think I'm doing plenty."

Sol scoffed. "Grades aren't everything. I'm saying you're not doing enough to fit with us. You're not even trying. I heard from Miss Beatrice that you're not even going with us in the next school trip to the Stark Islands."

So this was the angle she planned to attack her from. Alright. Shadi knew she could counter this, at least.

"I explained my decision to the headmistress, and she allowed it. If you have a problem with it, take it up with her."

"That's not the problem!" Sol stomped her foot on the ground. "That attitude is exactly what we were talking about. You never talk to anyone. You never want to come with us in school trips. You always leave when the bell rings and never make friends with anyone."

"Like I said, if you can get the headmistress or one of the teachers to order me to do any of those things, I'd gladly listen. Until then, you're wasting your time." Shadi breathed out. She wasn't used to talking so much. "Besides, the period to pay for the trip is already over. No matter how much you scoff and scream at me, I'm already not going. You're wasting your time."

"Hgh! This isn't just about the trip," Sol hissed. "You haven't been showing up to P.E. for a while now, and last I heard you didn't even present your design for our class jacket for the end of the year."

"I have medical reasons to avoid P.E." That was a lie. The headmistress had explicitly allowed her to skip those classes under medical pretenses so they wouldn't count for her overall grades. But Sol didn't need to know that. "And… I did present my design for the jacket. I knew it wouldn't be picked, but I sent it alongside everyone else's."

In that moment, Sol smiled, and Shadi realized she was just talking and talking until she could find something to attack her with.

"Wait… are you serious!?" A nasty laugh left her lips. "You're telling me that weird design you sent was actually for real!? We thought it was a joke!"

A few more laughs joined hers, echoing through the classroom. By this point they had the attention of the entire class, most of which were happy to join in on the 'fun'.

"Are you for real, Dawn!?"

"That jacket you drew was so creepy, it had black wings and spider webs and everything!"

"I thought an Ariados had gotten all over it!"

"It looked like something a Hex Maniac would wear."

"Seriously, talk about childish. When are you gonna grow up?"

"…my god, it was so cringy…"

Even those who didn't have much of a problem with Shadi had started chuckling or smiling by now. Reina was the only one not to join in. She looked away from the whole thing, frowning but too scared to jump in her defense.

Shadi's lips pursed tight for just a second. This was okay. These people didn't deserve to get a reaction out of her.

"If you didn't like my design, that's okay. We all have different tastes," she shrugged. "But don't go saying I didn't present anything. I did."

Sol, emboldened by everyone in the class backing her up, smiled smugly at that.

"Come on, you can't really be saying you tried with a design like that," she said with a gesture of her hand. "Tell you what, why don't you give it another go? We can all stay here after class while you draw up another design for the jackets, and if you get it right then we'll stop complaining! How's that sound?"

It was, in all honesty, a more clever scheme than Shadi would've thought possible from a stupid jock like Sol. It sounded like just the thing the teachers would approve of. It was the perfect way to trap her in the classroom and leave her to her classmates' mercy, who would surely reject whatever design she came up with just so she'd have to try again and again. Then, when they'd gotten all the enjoyment they could out of her humiliation, they'd blame her for being unable to get it right and ask her to apologize to them in excruciating detail before letting her go.

Shadi could see it all playing before her eyes, and she couldn't help but shiver. Fuck that. She'd much rather throw herself into traffic than spend another second than necessary around these brainless, worthless idiots. But it wasn't like she could convince the teachers if everyone else was against her.

Laughs and whispers and open insults flew through the room, bouncing off her.. Gulping, Shadi looked up at Sol, then over her shoulder at the girls behind her. Then she sighed and slumped her shoulders.

This wouldn't work. It never did. But it's not like she had any other option.

"Sol… listen."

The girl was taken aback by how quiet she'd said that. Since she stood between Shadi and the rest of the class, only she could see the girl's lips move, only she could hear her.

"I know why you're doing this," she said. "You're not on speaking terms with Reina anymore. I get that, and it's not of my business. But it must be lonely. That's probably why you flocked to… them."

Even when trying, she couldn't keep the poison from her voice, and her gaze unconsciously moved back toward the other girls. Sol didn't say anything. She just frowned, shoulders tensing up.

"They convinced you to come bother me." It wasn't a question. "But that's because they already tried it by themselves, and it didn't work. Ever wondered why they always avoid me and just talk behind my back? It's because last time one of them tried to start shit, I sent them back crying and shaking. They're all stupid rich girls. They think they're bullies, but they wouldn't last a day in a real school… trust me, I would know." She formed a bitter smile. She'd experienced her fair share of bullying even before coming here. "Insults are a weapon, and they're all a bunch of Mankeys swinging them like branches. But I know where to stick them where it hurts. So I've got some advice for you…"

She looked up, and her eyes met with Sol's. For a moment, it looked like the girl would recoil, but her anger at what she was hearing must've stopped her.

"Look for someone else to mess with," she snarled. "I'm not even a little bit interested in you and your posse of human-sized Slowpoke. Leave me alone, and I'll do the same to you. Got it?"

It didn't even take a second for her words to go amiss, sparking a much different reaction in Sol than she'd intended. The girl's face darkened, redness rising to her ears. If there'd been any chance of convincing her, it was probably gone now.

It always went like this. This entire school was built on a collective base of venomous politeness. Whenever she refused to partake in it and tried to be honest, it backfired.

"…You're the worst." Sol spat out those words as a whisper, only for Shadi to hear, but then started talking out loud, catching the class' attention once more. "You wanna know why everyone treats you like this, Dawn? I thought you were smart and figured it out, but I guess not."

Shadi sighed and looked away. "Can't wait to hear it."

"It's because you think you're so much better than everyone else." There was a bit of that enjoyment from before in Sol's voice, but it was laced with unmistakable honesty now. "And you're really bad at hiding it. You stink up the whole class with your sour face just by being here."

"I… just want you to leave me alone." Shadi snapped back up at her, eyes opening wide. "I never went out of my way to bother anyone! I just want to graduate and go on my trainer journey, that's all!"

"So what? You think we can't tell what you think just 'cause you don't say it out loud? Think we don't catch those ugly looks you're always giving us? It's creepy! How do you think we feel, always knowing there's someone in our class that hates our guts enough to… I don't even know! You could do anything to us. You look the part of a psycho, so how can we be happy if you're still here, huh?"

Shadi tried to snap back, to spew some of the hateful venom rising up from her stomach to her throat, but she couldn't. She choked on it, feeling dizzy with rage.

Other voices joined in, indistinguishable amongst themselves. Shadi couldn't tell who they belonged to, because she'd never cared to differentiate most of her classmates.

"No kidding. She'd do us a favor if she just left."

"Why is she even here?"

"Yeah, if she hates us so much why not transfer? It's creepy having her here with us!"

"And to think she wants to be a trainer. Mew, can you imagine a Champion like her?"

"I'd die of embarrassment for sure!"

Shadi had to clench her teeth not to spit on Sol's face. The knuckles on her fingers were white as a sheet with how strongly she was grabbing onto her desk. This was stupid. She wasn't angry, she wasn't… these people didn't deserve to…

Somewhere in the back of her mind, she heard the bell ring throughout the hallway outside. This was her chance. If she grabbed her stuff and ran out of the room, they wouldn't e able to call a teacher in time to stop her. She could leave. She could…

"…Yeah, you're right."

Sol looked down at her, arms folded, and raised an amused eyebrow, waiting for her response. So Shadi looked up and gave it to her.

"I do think I'm better than you, but it's not like that's a high bar to clear," she spat out. "You're all a bunch of stupid worthless cunts. If I've got no reason to be in this class, then you've got no reason to exist in this world. The only things you'll leave behind when you die are a bunch of kids just as hateful as you and all the bottles of alcohol you'll poison yourselves with once age catches up to you and you realize how meaningless your existences were."

The room fell into silence. Even the girls in the back, the ones who'd been giggling and heckling all throughout the exchange, stayed quiet after hearing that. But it wasn't because Shadi had hit them where it hurt or anything. It was because they genuinely couldn't believe what they were hearing. She could see the most dangerous kind of anger start to rise up their faces, but she didn't care. She kept talking, digging herself even further down.

"You're all just filth. Even if you paint yourselves gold, you'll still be carrion. And carrion is there to rot and stink up the place until someone is kind enough to throw it in the garbage where it belongs." She took a quick breath, then gave the entire class a look-over before finishing. "I'll say it one last time. I don't care about any of you. I'll just pinch my nose and ignore the stench until I can graduate and leave. And I suggest you all do the same."

The reactions were immediate. And even though Shadi had spoken so coldly and derisively, she couldn't help but flinch as she saw a few of her classmates stand up from their chairs. But no pain came. Insults flew through the room, as well as barely-disguised laughs. Mocking or hateful, all had a reaction. Except for Sol, and for Reina.

The latter had said nothing, still quiet, still looking down at her book as though she wanted to disappear into it. And the former simply stared at Shadi, her expression unreadable.

"…Really?"

Shadi didn't like the way Sol said that. A smile rose to the girl's face, but even so… what could she possibly say? Shadi didn't care. Words wouldn't hurt her. And even if she wanted to get physical, she'd gotten used to that too. There was no way Sol could hurt her.

"You really don't care about anyone here? Huh… and I thought I'd heard this weird rumor… something about you and Reina being pretty close."

It was like a bucket of icy water being dumped on her. Shadi froze, eyes widening with fear. No, this wasn't… there was no way Sol knew. She was just bluffing, she'd just seen them talk a few times and was going to tease her with that. There's no way she knew… the two of them were alone that one time, she was sure of it.

That's when Reina finally reacted. The sound of her book being slammed shut woke Shadi up, and she turned to see the girl pale as a sheet, staring at Sol with a mixture of horror and betrayal.

…Oh.

Of course. When that had… happened, Sol and Reina were still friends. And that was the sort of thing one told their friends if they trusted them enough.

Fuck.

The entire class was paying attention now, hanging to every one of Sol's words. The same idea seemed to have crossed their heads, and while a few of them looked surprised or disgusted, others looked ecstatic.

"I don't remember who I heard it from," Sol lied, avoiding Reina's eyes. "But I heard it happened last month while the rest of us were in the school trip to Hearthome. You and Reina were the only ones who stayed, right? There weren't many teachers around so you had a lot of self-study periods. A little Starly told me you used that free time to kiss behind the student council's building while no one was looking."

At that declaration, there was an 'Ohhhh!" of both joyful and mocking voices. Shrieks of shock and laughter erupted through the classroom, not only at those news but at the horrified look on Shadi's face, a sight they all seemed to enjoy like a rare delicacy. It was absolute chaos. A teacher would come in soon, curious, and if they explained what they were screaming about…

Shadi swallowed. She had no pretenses about who she was, but in a school like this, she knew what parts of herself to keep hidden as to avoid trouble. That day had just… been a moment of weakness, a sudden chance she'd taken with someone she liked, even if it was risky. She didn't regret it, but still… if the faculty found out, she wasn't sure if her stellar grades would be enough to protect her from admonishment. That's the kind of institution this was, after all.

"Well?" asked Sol, chuckling. "Is it true or not?"

Something cold and heavy blocked her throat, forbidding her from responding. Unconsciously, she turned to look at Reina, who if anything looked even more terrified than her. Their eyes met, and for just a moment, Shadi hoped there might be a way out of this without denying their–

"O-of course not!"

For the first time, Reina's voice rang out sharply, shutting everyone up. She stood up suddenly, eyes wide with anger and… guilt.

"I would… n-never do something like that, much less with…" She hesitated, only for a second. "Much less with Shadi! Stop making up rumors no one would believe anyway! That's really… really awful!"

It was a good thing Shadi had turned her face away from the rest of the class. Reina was the only one who saw the way her expression changed, the way her eyes twitched as though beset by some kind of itch. Reina couldn't stand to look for more than an instant. Shame and redness rising to her face, she turned around sharply and grabbed her backpack, hoisting it over her tense shoulder.

Shadi saw the way her lower lip shook and her eyes narrowed in pain.

"I'm… g-going before I hear any more shameful rumors like that!" she screamed, voice shaking. "Goodbye!"

Laughs and sneers followed her to the hallway as she left, but once she was out of sight, they were turned back toward Shadi. The girl stood still as a statue. Head hung low, eyes hidden by her locks of ashen hair. Her whole body shook.

"…There you have it." Sol made that annoying gesture with her hand again, smiling smugly. "Guess I gotta say sorry now, since you were telling the truth. You don't like us, and no one here likes you either! There's no way anyone here would wanna kiss you."

Amidst the sneers and laughs, Shadi's patience snapped. Before it'd been thin yet resistant like a spider-web, but now it had been drowned by the pool of boiling venom rising up her stomach to her throat.

"I'm very, very sorry. Please forgive me for thinking that any of us actually l–"

Shadi let out an unhinged, feral scream and jumped on top of Sol, closing her thin fingers around the girl's face and throat and throwing both of them to the ground.