ALL NOVEL Chapter 149: Cookie
A small office occupies a very peculiar space, simultaneously existing in three different locations: At the bottom of Mendass, at the edge of Nisaty's World Border, and in Darwin, Australia. There is very little inside the small office, with the only objects inside being a desk, two chairs, a coat rack, and fifteen boxes of Girl Scout Cookies. As for lifeforms, technically speaking, there is nothing inside. A clone made out of shadows and a bunnygirl touched by forces beyond comprehension are not what typically falls under the definition of lifeform.
The bunny girl wears a sleek black pinstripe suit, with an equally as dark trousers and shirt to give off a very mysterious and otherworldly aura, alongside the tentacles constructed using dark matter squirming behind her back and the eternal shadow filter applied on her face. She leans over her desk, reading over a sheaf of papers, each page turn evidently distressing her more than the one before. This is Eldra Jaspers, colloquially known in Mendass as The Man In The Pinstripe Suit.
In contrast, the shadow clone that acted as her company carelessly swung her legs back and forth, casually nibbling on the many biscuit spoils she gathered herself through what she claimed to have been trials of combat. She pays no mind to her companion's anguish, being content with her current actions. This is Cookie, colloquially known in the Shadowrealm as That One.
"This is annoying," says the one wearing a suit. She looks around, paranoidly, as if she believes someone is watching. "We weren't supposed to be focused on… at least, not this early. How are we even being observed?"
The one wearing a maid dress takes a bite of a cookie before offering the half-eaten treat to the other, who declines. She shrugs, golfing the rest down in one swoop. "Omniscient narrator, probably."
"Is that why it seems much weirder?" She faces the shadow with a serious gaze, only to be met with a questioning raised eyebrow, confusing her. "What's with the look?"
"We're talking about my mom's narrative, right?" The clone asks, despite already knowing the answer. Before Eldra can reply, Cookie continues, "It's always weird. You're probably overreacting. Hand me the papers."
The bunny girl hands over the updating story, which is quickly skimmed. The shadow clone puts the papers on her lap, contemplating for a moment before coming to a consensus. She was about to share when she chose to stay silent, wishing to elicit a response from the other girl in the room. Eldra quickly got annoyed and opened her mouth, "So what di-" She was rudely interrupted.
"Like I guessed earlier, an omniscient narrator." Cookie let out a sigh. "If you were smarter, you'd notice the shadow clones tend to have different tones, formats, and even focus. Evidently, our puppetmaster deems it necessary to utilise something out of our control just to show us off."
"For what purpose? Why now?"
"Because shit is hitting the fan." Cookie smirks. "Obviously, we're meant to join in too, and in your case, become more involved than you were before."
"Tch." Eldra clicks her tongue, annoyed at current events. "So what are we doing?"
"Don't you mean 'So what am I doing?'"
"I tho-"
"You thought wrong." The shadow clone rises, causing the other girl to shrink down, forced to sit down. "Soon, Darky will be planning something involving all my sisters and Physical Madeleine. Let that play out, and then at some point in the middle of it, you will crash the party, derailing everything. After that," Cookie let out a malicious smile, "I will enter the fray. From that point, you will not be needed."
"G-Got it." The bunny girl quickly nodded her head up and down.
"Good." The shadow clone's face returned to a neutral expression, and she returned to her seat, opening up a new packet of biscuits. "Ooh, mint flavour. Exotic."
"U-umm…"
The eater of cookies sent a glare towards the other. "What?"
"About Myka… you'll leave her alone… right?"
"Of course, of course." She takes a bite out of the mint-flavoured treats. "A deal is a deal. You know a lot about deals, don't you?"
"Y-Yeah…"
"Now, off you go."
"Got it." The Man In The Pinstripe Suit sunk into her shadow, exiting her extradimensional office space, leaving the Weird Shadow Clone on her lonesome. She continues eating her coo-
Okay, enough with the narration. Hello there, audience. It's me, Cookie. No shadow clone number, and if I were to be given a title, it'd be… nothing. As you can tell, I'm the new antagonist on the block, although don't mistake me for the other… unfortunate attempts. They're so laughably bad. Tell me, were any of you scared when Myka came on? She got taken by Madeleine's flow, completely derailing her plot. Despite that, she's still the most successful of the bad guys, unless you count Sol The Round Bandit's actual killing of Madeleine a success.
Hmm… this would be the part where I would monologue, maybe talk down the other villains whilst elevating myself, but that does nothing. Instead, I'll say what I'll do. I will kill my sisters in their own storylines before finishing my streak with Physical Madeleine. It should be easy. The crack I made in the Shadowrealm has already taken some lives. I think I'll start with number 9. She's the one with the detective girlfriend.
Now… there's no Side Note, I will not dillydally around with such unimportant things. As for my last words… I hope you like bad endings.
Chapter namesake: Cookie by NewJeans
