The Red Hand

"Did they actually survive that massive explosion?" Kanato asked as the group set down. "That explosion was large enough to level an entire mountain and even created a crater that by my rough math is larger than some cities.”

“At this point I'm expecting it to be like one of those period dramas where the character just gets back up after being hit with the dull end of the sword.” Amakusa commented as she praised the ground for returning to her.

“Maybe... But I still find it hard to believe that anything would survive such power, especially after being beaten down by you beforehand." He said as he looked over at Akagi.

"Oh don't worry, they're still kicking." Akagi answered as she looked into the smoking crater. The dust kicked up had yet to settle and there as almost no visibility once you got past the lip. "The whole reason I came here in the first place was to talk to them, so killing them would kinda invalidate my original purpose."

{And yet you still might do it. I know you well enough to know that you can and would do exactly that. Cough Baron Arfson, Cough.} Yumi snickered as she poked fun at Akagi's prior history of killing then asking questions never.

"Hush!" Akagi grumbled at her. "Lest I bonk you again!"

{Oh no, not the bonking...} Yumi's eye roll was audible. {Whatever shall I do?}

"I swear... You're lucky I like you..." Akagi sighed.

"Where is that voice coming from anyway?" Kanato asked. He could hear Yumi but couldn't see her. “It sounds like she's closeby, but I saw you take her somewhere.”

"Oh, nowhere special just from within Hell itself." Amakusa replied with a fake smile.

"I mean... She's not wrong." Halifax laughed.

"How is it Hell when it has free breakfast and as many kitty snuggles as you could ask for?" Akagi retorted. “Sounds like a great place to me if you're asking.”

{We're not...} (Amakusa)

{I don't know, the breakfast waffles weren't very good, they were a bit too crispy this time. Not to mention that the kitty stole my sock!} Yumi laughed and was bonked.

"But to answer your question, Yumi is within my shadow. I'm keeping her there for the time being as I'm not willing to risk something stupid happening to her, lest this world be turned into a flaming hellscape." Akagi answered.

"Uhhhh..." Kanato looked to the three girls for answers.

"All you need to know is that you must never touch the Yumi, and all will be well." Halifax shrugged.

"Yeah, keep your womanizing hands to yourself, Kanato." Amakusa snickered.

"Why do you..." Kanato pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. "Never mind, forget it."

{I just can't win with her, can I? I asked her out ONCE, and I'm the forever bad guy...} (Kanato)

"Look alive!" Elariel's raised voice startled the others. "I sense those two! They're coming out of the crater!" Her body tensed. She wasn't surprised to see them alive still, and even after everything that just happened she was still wary of the twins and their power.

"Alright! Chop-Chop, you two! I've got things to do and pets to get, so hurry your assess up here so I can interrogate you!" Akagi yelled into the dust-filled crater, and after a few moments, the dark outlines of two figures could be seen walking up the slope of the crater, and as they got close enough to exit the dust the group got a good look at the beaten and bruised visages of Zo and Ro. Each had taken extreme levels of damage, and it was a wonder that they could even walk at this point with the amount of damage to their bodies.

"Owch." Halifax commented. "Looks like you really beat the tar out of them."

"More like I beat the fight out of them." Akagi laughed as the two stepped over the lip of the crater and stood in front of the group, a dark shadow cast over their faces.

{I sense no more hostility from either of them. I suppose that little display finally broke their will to fight, or perhaps I shattered their Spirit? I do oh so like that second one.} (Akagi)

"So, are we done?" Akagi asked the two Primordials, who stood in silence. "I hope you two now understand just how-"

"BOSS!" Akagi was interrupted as the Primordial twins fell to one knee and looked up at her, their faces practically beaming with bright smiles.

"Eh?" Akagi let out an unintentional squeak, confused by her statement.

{What?} (Akagi)

"Boss! That was so cool!" Zo's eyes sparkled. "You fought us all like ZOOM, SWOOSH, BAMN, and just when we thought we had you, you completely wrecked us!"

{Eh?!?} (Akagi)

"Oh yeah! And what was even better is that you so effortlessly defeated us even after we even dug deeper and found power that we didn't even know that we had! And yet you still defeated us so effortlessly, Boss!" Ro's eyes were similarly sparkling.

{Ah! I see!} Yumi seemed to understand what was going on, but everyone else, including Akagi, was confused.

"Uhhhhh...." Akagi was completely lost for words.

{Can I go home yet?} (Akagi)

"Boss! Please forgive us for our impertinence! We were fools for daring to oppose you!" Zo bowed her head, followed by Ro. "We will atone for that mistake by serving you faithfully from now on, Boss!"

"Indeed! Please allow my foolish sister and I to make amends, Boss." Ro pleaded for mercy. "I can promise you that you won't regret taking us under your wing! We shall serve you and your cause faithfully from now until the end of time!"

"Huh... I don't think Akagi's bingo card had this on it." Halifax snickered.

{My, My. To see YOU of all people completely lost for words. I should savor such a sight, as I doubt it will happen again anytime soon. Though I must admit that I'm surprised by your surprise since this has happened before.} Yumi snickered.

"Oh my God..." Akagi put her head in her hands in despair. "WHY?!? WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS HAPPEN?!? AHHHHHHH!" She groaned. This was not the first time that somebody had sworn fealty to her after being beaten into submission or saved, but every time it went down like this, it was always somebody crazy.

{Chloe, Yumi, Dibore, Yaltz, Kimora... EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM WAS FUCKING BATSHIT CRAZY! I DON'T NEED MORE OF THAT! I ALREADY HAVE A FUCKING CULT!} (Akagi)

"Can I not just recruit one normal fucking person?!?" Akagi screamed into her hands as she let out a whimper. “Please?”

{There there, just think of it this way. Now you have even more people to help us worship you and your floof! I see this as nothing but a victory for us!} Yumi was laughing hysterically within Akagi's shadow while being bonked repeatedly on the head.

{WHO IS THIS US YOU SPEAK OF?!? WHO?!? BECAUSE I SURE AS HELL DON'T THINK THAT INCLUDES ME!} (Akagi)

"Is Boss not happy with us?" Zo asked, worried that she was going to be cast aside.

"Shall we end our miserable lives in atonement, Boss? Ro summoned a dagger and put it to his throat. “Because if that's what it takes-”

"NO!" Akagi smacked it out of his hand, sending the dagger flying into the stratosphere. "Don't you dare fucking kill yourself and make this all for nothing! AHHH! WHY MUST PEOPLE DRIVE ME NUTS?!?"

{Welcome to the team! Worship of the Catkagi is on Sundays at four, and there's a potluck after the service!} Yumi continued laughing as she was continuously bonked.

"Yumi, recall that I can destroy your body as much as I want, and it will regenerate, so please don't tempt me..." Akagi continued to die of cringe.

{If it's what you desire, then go ahead! It will not change what is currently happening!} Yumi was still laughing hysterically, happy to take advantage of Akagi's current plight.

"I hate you sometimes..." Akagi sighed.

{And I love you very much.} (Yumi)

"Damn, Yumi is not letting up." Halifax snickered. "Though I suppose it's only fair that she gets to tease her back after everything Akagi puts her through!" She continued to laugh even as a fan fell from the sky, breaking into pieces as it fell on her head. "HA! You're gonna need a bigger one than that!"

"Fucking Sword... I'll show you..." Akagi grumbled before turning back to the, still bowing, Primordials. "Okay, the matter of your fealty aside, I've got some questions from you that need answering."

"Boss!" Zo and Ro said at the same time.

{...} (Akagi)

"So, as you have probably figured out, I'm here to kill the Gods." Akagi's words caused both Primordials to elicit a nasty smirk. "I figured you'd like that. However, the bad news is that this world is Grade-A fucked, and it's unlikely that you're going to get to savor that happiness for very long." She figured they were tied to this world like the Gods and couldn't leave either.

"Has this world's stability truly decreased that much, Boss?" Ro asked.

"Before we were sealed, we noticed a bit of instability in the fabric of this world. But to think that it would come to this..." Zo's words drifted off.

"I can't say why this world is falling apart, only that it has a few hundred years at best before it goes kaput." Akagi said, and Elariel confirmed her words.

"We were hoping to forestall this by..." Elariel paused, knowing that three of the people standing around her were already agitated enough regarding the Spirit issue. "Though it seems our efforts were not only in vain but were never actually going to work in the first place."

"Hah!" Zo laughed. "I'm going to bet that it was you idiots that caused this!" She continued. "Our Dad always said that the Gods would ruin this world, and it looks like he was right."

"This is exactly why our kind didn't want to interfere with the natural progression of this world." Ro commented. "Tis only natural that reality itself didn't take too kindly to the arrogance of the Gods."

"Oh, but it takes Akagi's perfectly fine." Amakusa said under her breath as she rolled her eyes.

"It just knows better than they give me shit." Akagi laughed before continuing. "But on a more serious note, I'm going to need a bit of help from you two."

"Of course!" (Ro x Zo)

"But..." Ro paused.

"Is there a problem?" Akagi asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Less a problem and more... confusion... I suppose." Ro explained. "How can we do anything to help you? You're far more powerful than us, so it's hard to believe that we could do anything to assist you in any meaningful manner."

{You could give ear scratches to the kitty?} (Yumi)

{Don't make me put you on mute...} (Akagi)

"Uh... But yeah, its as bro said." Zo agreed, though was intrigued and confused by ear scratches comment. "The only thing we can really offer is raw power, and you clearly don't need more of that."

"I will dispute the claim that I have no need of more strength." Akagi replied. "I always like more pieces to place on my board, but the kind of help I need from you two is in the information sphere. Though I will most certainly find a use for your talents."

"If that's the case, then we'll tell you whatever you want to know." Ro nodded.

“Yeah! Just ask away!” Zo smiled.

"Alright, then I'm going to need Spacial Coordinates for the Heavenly Realm." Akagi asked for something crazy complex like it was no big deal. "That way, I can go up there and kick those idiots ass and end this whole thing when the time comes."

The two Primordials paused for a minute before looking at each other and turning to Akagi.

"Spacial Coordinates? What are those?" Ro and Zo said at the same time.

{Well, that's not a good sign.} (Yumi)

"Okay, let's put it this way..." Akagi sighed. "I need the magical information that you use to travel into the Heavenly Realm of the Gods. I've been told that Primordials can transport themselves up there, so just tell me how you do that, and I'll figure out the rest."

"Oh..." Zo paused, a look of worry forming on her face.

"We... We... Um... We have no idea how to do that." Ro answered with sweat on his forehead.