A magic school story

Chapter Thirteen:

“Hey, Miss Beazley.”

“Hey, Mr Goldwyn.” She greeted back. “Rather lively aren’t we?” she said, she wasn’t smiling but he could tell she was amused.

“Yeah…” he mumbled, deflating again. “Yeah, it’s okay. Headmistress Lenden said it’d be okay if I portaled home for a bit.”

Miss Beazley dropped an omnispill into her hot water. Jess remembered loving the taste of those but his dad used to hate how unhealthy diet crazes were so he never bought them. It was a little effervescent pill that would change the taste of whatever you mixed it in. It was kind of like stirring in syrup or an instant mix, except omnispills were much more powerful or ethical than anything nestle could cook up. It could even change the texture of whatever you put it in. So you could get a cup of hot water that tasted just like coffee, hot chocolate, French onion soup. Anything really, and you’d never know the difference. They were expensive though and didn’t pack on any calories or nutrients so people loved it for dieting.

Right now though? Jess wouldn’t need an omnispill. Nothing would taste sweeter than his little victory.

Miss Beazley took a deep chug from her mug and exhaled a satisfying mountain of steam.

“How long do you want the portal open for?”

“I won’t be gone too long.” Jess shrugged. “Just getting some stuff.”

Miss Beazley nodded. “Mm, and good luck to you in the dorm games, Mr Goldwyn. You have much to live up to.”

“Oh, yeah.” Jess realised. “My dad and aunt won it twice, didn’t they?”

“Three times. They won it in their first year, as well.”

Oh, yeah… Jess remembered that he remembered it as two wins because his dad didn’t count the first win as winning. Since first and second years don’t have much of a chance to do anything in the dorm games. His dad said even though the dorm did win, he didn’t count it as his own win because he didn’t contribute anything.

“Yeah well, we probably won’t win.” Jess admitted, then he shrugged. “We’ll see. Okay, bye Mizzz Beasleyyyyy.” He drawled jokingly.

“Bye, Mr Goldwyn.”

Jess stepped through the same door that he came through on his very first day of Boxtons- yesterday. And he was already going back. He's stepped through the hazy purple that appeared and once again was back in his house with plain white walls and grey carpeting. It wasn't dark in the house, but Boxtens was usually so bright- especially in the secretary’s office, so it took his eyes a second to adjust to the dark here.

His first stop should be the basement. Dad would have a good stockpile of magic wands and staves and there would be quite a bit of magical gear down there. But then it suddenly dawned on him that he was still damn hungry. He might need omnispills after all.

Kitchen first then! He should also pack some more clothes to take to Boxtens too. He wasn’t exactly sure who would be washing his clothes for him it at Boxtens and he had a nasty suspicion that students would have to do it themselves- especially in the Cancer dorm... Maybe exclusively at the Cancer dorm. He would probably try and avoid washing clothes, that was insane work and even with magic it took way too long for his liking. The best thing to do would be to just constantly wear clean things so he wouldn’t have to bother with that.

He switched his phone on for the first time in a while. It was odd not being able to use it for so long, but whilst he was here, he might as well check if he got any messages from anyone or whether anything interesting was going on. Honestly, he just needed something for his thumbs to do. Had quite bad brain rot.

The logo on his phone appeared as the phone booted up. Whilst that took its time, he rummaged through the fridge. There was an old bowl of oatmeal that he didn't remember making, a half block of cheese and just some rice that they hadn’t eaten. The uber eats app was still linked to his Dad's card, so he could probably order something and have it be here in a half hour. The phone finally buzzed on and Jess flicked through his notifications. It had only been over a day but he had tons of them all already. Most were spam from Youtube, but there were eighteen from Chowder and maybe four or five from some other friends.

He didn’t have time to read whilst he was browsing through uber eats. So he hit call on Chowder’s number instead, if he was at school he probably wouldn’t answer but most likely he’d slip out of class for a second and call him back. There was no way to use his phone at Boxtens so hopefully Chowder picked up.

The phone buzzed in his hand as it dialed out.

Ring.

Maybe pizza? But pizza places generally didn’t have any good sides, snacks, salads or desserts. And sometimes they didn’t even do pizza right.

Ring Ring.

The burger place at the mall was good, and they’d deliver a good milkshake too.

The buzzing finally ended and the call connected.

“Hey-”

“Help! Somethings trying to kill me!”

Jess’s blood went cold. “Chowder, where are you?”

He heard clattering that must have been the phone falling. But he could hear Chowder panting and objects clattering.

“Chowder where are you?” he asked, making sure his voice was clear.

“Stop! Stop!”

“Chowder!” he yelled into the phone, as Jess unlocked the basement. “I need to know where you are.”

“Home! Home!”

Chowder’s house was ten minutes away walking. Half that if he ran. But that wasn’t enough. Jess was already rummaging in the basement for his dad’s old Wraithboard. His dad only let him use it as a kid because Jess kept trying to steal it. But what Jess didn’t realise at the time was that learning to ride the Wraithboard was his punishment. Most of the scars still hadn’t healed.

Wraithboards were long- well they were hoverboards but magic. They were long and made of quickmetal, a metal that could magically sculpt around your feet to make sure the rider didn’t fall off. The boards were quite heavy and ornately sculpted with spikes and storage since they were used for combat or travel. But the boards were notoriously difficult to use. It stored in substantial amounts of magic to simply keep the rider and itself in the air and so you would need to constantly keep focus and use extremely strong magic to get it to move. It was like driving a car but the pedals and steering wheel were ten times heavier and if your focus slipped when riding them- you’d fall. Brooms, carpets, even bicycles were much simpler to use. But Wraithboards were fast. Blindingly fast and agile.

And that’s what he needed now.

He shot straight up into the sky, this part was fine. For now, all he needed to do was hurtle skyward so no one would see him. He shot upward at blistering pace, leaving his stomach well behind him and his eyes stinging in the air.

It was an incredible feeling, the swiftness of motion, your body feeling every ounce of the speed and power as if it was its own. If you rode the Wraithboard right you didn’t feel like you were on a board, you felt like you were flying. He was so high up now that it felt like he was looking at a google earth shot. Luckily he slowed down on his own because he was tired from pouring in magic to move straight up. He caught his breath and felt himself sweating. Using raw magic as power was extremely exhausting. Using spells often required only a small chunk of your magic but immense focus to convert magical energy. But things that required raw magical energy were extremely difficult because not only was controlling raw magic difficult but it was also dangerous, if you couldn’t control your magical bandwidth you could drain out your life energy.

He leaned his body slightly forward, dipping the nose of the body Wraithboard a few degrees downward and he zipped forward! His clothes beat back against his body furiously and his eyes struggled to stay open through the sizzling streaking air. And the deafening screech that gave the board its name deafened him. But, most importantly, it was fast.

He hadn’t been a minute in the air yet and he could already see Chowder’s building just a few hundred metres away.

He tried pulling away some of his magic to slow down but he pulled too much, and the board shuddered dangerously beneath his feet, and he could feel the jolt in his bones. He was going to fall. In a second of panic he burst more magic to stay in the air, but this time he put in too much and launched forward and then-

He saw the corner of chowders building. He tried turning as quickly as he could away from it to avoid slamming face first but the side of his body and back slammed into it and he tumbled to the ground and the board sank with a ground shaking thud- nearly landing atop his head. He swore into the dirt, as pain suddenly lit throughout his body. Without thinking he tried waking up, but his ribs begged him to lie down and stay there. He glanced at the wall he’d crashed into and a chunk of brick and cement actually broke off the corner. Even with him being a mage, and the building being old and crummy, his ribs were not made for smashing open concrete.

Jeez. He stumbled again to his feet, then he grinned. That was bloody fun.

He might have broken a rib or two though. But he grimaced as he realised his healing runes had faded. Runes stored spells that could be released instantly when you activated them with magic and healing runes were runes that could be imbued onto your body. But his runes had faded since he hadn’t been re-runed in the wizarding world for a long time. That meant no healing till he got back to school.

He struggled his way up to Chowders apartment building, kicking open the old rickety main door open. He bolted quickly to the elevator, limping slightly because it hurt to move his left side. He smashed at the elevator door button. Finally, the damn thing opened and he jumped in and started smashing the 3rd floor button, not stopping even as the elevator moved.

“Come on, come on.” He muttered the doors finally opened, and he jumped out. Chowders apartment was at the end of the hall-

“Hello there, Jess!”

Shit. The old neighbour Miss Batsy waddled her way slowly from her apartment with her chihuahua trying to eat her crocs as she walked. Normally, Jess loved the old lady. She was ancient, nearly 90 and very frail and slow but she was still wickedly funny in a very sitcom-y way, but now was not the time.

“Hi, Miss Batsy.” Jess said, giving a quick smile.

“I thought you went off to some what fancy private school. Charles was telling me… He sure can talk that feller! Yeah, that feller…”

“Just back for a visit.” He grimaced.

“Oh… Okay.” She said, fixing her enormously thick glasses. “Could you take Einstein out for his business? Darn, elevator- it just moves too fast. Too fast.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jess said, quickly grabbing the dog by the scruff of its neck. “Bye, Batsy.”

He didn’t wait for her to say bye or leave, that would take business days. He ran for Chowder’s door, and pushed it open not bothering to knock.

“Chowder…” he said, peering around the room. He’d shifted the shivering Chihuahua to under his right arm.

The lounge was a mess. There had to have been a robbery or some kind fight here. Chowder’s room door was shut and knives were sticking out of it. The couch was on its side, the tv was toppled over and the place smelled of rotten meat.

“Chowder!” Jess called.

There was no answer, so he crept over to Chowder’s room.

“Chowder! Whoah-”

Suddenly he felt a rush of wind as a knife missed his face by a hairs width and landed into the door. He dropped the dog and turned to see where the knife came from.

And then he spotted it dancing gleefully on the kitchen counter: a small imp demon. It looked like a tiny gremlin with grey skin and red blistered sores all over its knobbly body. An imp demon. The imp grabbed another knife from an upturned drawer and hurled it at Jess. The knife should have been easy to judge but Jess was slow to react and couldn’t cast a spell in time so he had to leap out of the way- and land on his ribs again.

"Ow, damnit!"

He rolled over onto his back and he saw the imp hanging from the ceiling on all fours.

It hissed at him.

“Kill. Kill.”

It lurched down at Jess and this time he’d recovered enough composure and a quick telekinetic spell was enough to flick the imp into the wall. It made a sound like a plushy hitting the wall and fell to the floor with a moan.

Jess rubbed his sore ribs. Now, he was quite pissed but also surprised. He could have sworn that imp said ‘kill’. Imp demons were mischievous and not too evil. They didn't bother with possession or killing. They spend more time messing with humans. At most they hid your car keys, left the taps open, sometimes they let a dog out. Occasionally when lots of imps got together they did manage to start fires or cut power lines but then never outright killed people. Any deaths they did manage were always indirect and the result of their playing .

But this one was clearly after Chowder. Why was it after Chowder? Jess picked up the imp by its leg then gave it a shake, like he was shaking out his jacket to see if he had any change in the pockets.

"Hey, you awake?”

Jess shook the imp again, when it didn't respond.

"Yoohoo…”

Without warning the imp suddenly snapped awake and bit his finger.

Jess yelled and started shaking the imp trying to get it off of his hand. But the imp had locked its jaw around Jess’s finger like a pitbull with a five-year-old. Jess shook his hand yelling and finally with a sudden burst Jess whipped his hand forward and the imp flew through the air like a knobby potato with limbs.

“Oh, you little… bread basket!” Jess swore as he stumbled around the lounge trying to quell his burning finger, and then stubbing his toe against the upturned table. The imp too mumbled something angry at Jess in Russian for some reason. This thing was international travelled?

And then it fled towards the window. That was bad. Imps weren’t really dangerous to a mage but if it disappeared now and it could back later for Chowder. He needed to question it to find out why it was being so stupid and trying to kill a human but if it was trying to escape now then Jess would need to exorcise it outright. Jess started pulling up pure magic in his hands to fire it at the imp. Shooting pure magic wasn't efficient but it was enough for an imp. But just as Jess was about to attack, the Imp saw this, panicked, and then fled into the kitchen.

"You shit!" Jess yelled, almost slipping on the old slippery tiles as he turned into the kitchen.

But to his horror he saw the chihuahua walking drunkenly through the room.

"Kill... Kill... Won't kill dog! Won't kill dog!" And then it laughed and started shaking.

Oh my god. The imp realised it was about to be exorcised and tried to possess the dog hoping for mercy. But at least now that the imp was inside a chihuahua it was probably more annoying but much less dangerous.

"Kill. Kill..." the chihuahua barked, then started coughing.

"You, just wait here" Jess sighed in defeated exasperation. "Stay!" This was a headache. “Why are you here anyway?"

"I don’t answer to you mortal! I am bound."

Great, a blood oath. Why on earth was an imp on a blood oath trying to kill Chowder?

He walked over to Chowder’s door, leaving the imp in the kitchen.

“Chowder, look if you’re in there I really need to know if you’re alive.”

And to Jess’s relief he heard a shout from the other side.

"How do I know that it’s you!"

"Who else would it be? You just called me!"

"I can't, I can't open the door." he heard Chowder say, he was on the verge of tears.

He wanted Chowder to open the door, but what would happen after that? What even was Jess going to say? How would he explain the imp demon? How would jess explain anything? That he was a mage? That something had tried to kill Chowder and that he didn't know why.

"Chowder..." Jess began. "Just... Trust me okay."

The door clicked open slowly.

“You okay?” Jess asked, cautiously.

"Yeah." Chowder sniffed, but then finally broke down crying. "I thought I was going to die."

Jess patted Chowder’s shoulders and pulled him into a hug.

“You’re okay. You’re okay now.” Jess promised.

“Yeah,” Chowder said, taking a step back from him. “Jess, dude.” Chowder said, recovering himself. “I know you’re a mage.”

“Okay… Cool...” Jess nodded.

“Yeah.”

“How though?” Jess squeaked as he exploded. Strange, he meant to shout but his voice was still in shock. He was slightly taken aback, but he believed Chowder- the fact that he said mage not magic man or wizard was telling.

“Your dad told me like half an hour ago.” Chowder mumbled.

“Half- Jesus. Well… I’m a mage.” Jess doing jazz hands, but Chowder didn’t seem impressed. “Why the hell did he tell you!”

“It was an accident.” Chowder shrugged, giving a small smile. “I snuck in to get the class project. I didn’t think anyone was home.”

“What are you talking about? What project?” Jess asked in confusion.

“Jess.” Chowder said, patiently.

“Yeah?”

“Shut up.”

“Okay.”

“I climbed in through the window, then I went downstairs… turns out your dad was there and I saw him heating his coffee… with his hands...”

“Yeah, fair.” Jess shrugged. “Why would he told you everything though? Normally you just…” and Jess clicked his fingers. “Do the memory wipe.”

“Your dad said the paper work would get him in trouble.”

“Ohhh.” Jess grinned. “Bloody hypocrite that guy, isn’t he?” Jess laughed. “True true, he would get in so much shit for this.”

Just then Jess, heard scampering behind him.

“Kill, Kill- woof!”

“What the hell did you do to Miss Batsy's dog?" Chowder screeched.

“I didn't do anything.” Jess protested. “The imp demon tried to possess the dog.”

“Woof! Woof!”

Why was it barking? It seemed like it was switching in between the imp and the dog. He didn’t know much demonology but he knew enough general lore that he knew that imp demons were not capable of proper possession. It looked like this one messed up here. It couldn’t even possess a Chihuhua.

“So, the knives and everything flying around.” Chowder breathed. “That was demon?”

“An imp demon.” Jess said. “You couldn’t see it in its spirit form but its in a body now so here it is. They’re supposed to be like gremlins?” Jess told Chowder. “They don’t try to kill people like this… You mind if I call my dad? Ask him to explain all of this.”

Jess dialed his dad’s number on a Whatsapp call. Who knows where that guy was- and hopefully he wasn’t in a magic centre-

But the call dialed through.

“Missing me already?” his father’s voice came through dryly.

“Oh, you know it daddy.” Jess twanged. “Yeah… Look, Chowder got attacked by an imp demon after he spoke to you.”

“Did you manage to save him?” his father asked immediately.

“Yeah!” Jess laughed. “Think I’d be this loosey goosey if Chowder was a lump of gravy now?”

“Has Chowder told you about our meeting, Jess?”

“Yeah yeah.”

“Don’t say ‘yeah yeah’.” His father snapped. “Answer me correctly.”

“Yeah,” Jess sighed. “He told me he caught you using magic. Good job by the way.”

“Pay for your own meal plan from now.”

“IwasjokingIwasjoking.” Jess screamed in panic.

“How was Chowder attacked?” his father pressed on.

“Some imp demon followed him home. Yeah, but… These things aren’t supposed to kill people right? What happened?”

His father grunted. “It may have been my fault. I had returned home from work earlier. I was tracking something powerful this week, but something may have followed me instead. An imp must have latched to Chowder whilst he was here.”

Jesus.

“Are you sure?” Jess asked quietly.

“It’s a theory.”

“Are you safe?” Jess asked.

“Of course. For now, exorcise the imp. Have you questioned it?”

“Blood oath.” Jess said, lowering his tone so Chowder didn’t hear anything. “It probably did latch onto Chowder at our house.”

“I’ll deal with it.”

“Okay.” Jess swallowed.

“Not a word of this, you understand?” His father said.

“Sure. Hey, at least everything’s okay you know? Day is saved, huh?”

“Hardly.” His father said, trying to keep calm. “Have you exorcised the imp?”

“Uhhh, I got it contained.” Jess said, glancing back at Chowder who was backing away from the Chihuahua. “Like a dog on a leash.”

“Exorcise it.”

“Will do.” Jess agreed.

“I’ll take care of the rest.” His dad said.

“Thanks.”

“Can I ask whether you were kicked out already?” his father asked, half joking, half bracing for disappointment.

Jess laughed. “Nah, they didn't kick me out. it’s coincidence I got back here in time. I actually came home to get some stuff for exams.”

His dad gave a small chuckle. “Good, well good luck, Jess.”

“Thanks.” Jess said softly. “Hey, um…”

“What is it?” his dad asked.

“I signed up for the dorm games.”

“You signed up?” his dad said, and Jess could picture his dad’s surprised expression.

“Eh, seems like way to kill some time.”

“Jess.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’ll be serious.” Jess said.

“Jess,” his dad repeated. “I’m proud of you. Do your best. And just remember everything I taught you, okay?”

“Aw, jeez man…” Jess mumbled, but chuckled softly. “You got it.”

“I’ll see you on your birthday.”

Jess nodded. But then he realised that his dad couldn’t see his that, but before he could speak the call cut. Jess quickly dried his eyes and turned around.

“Well looks like we’re okay- Chowder! Why are you playing with the demon!”

“Dude, I don't think this thing is fully possessed? It keeps switching between the dog and the imp. It's like half and half.” Chowder said, as he rubbed the dogs belly.

"Oh, yeah don't stop don't stop!" the thing seethed in its lecherous voice.

“Look Chowder,” Jess said, hoping to end all this quickly. “There won’t be anymore demons coming, but we have to kill this one.”

“Dude, what the hell!” Chowder yelled. “Why are you going all Cruella de Vil on me!”

“I’m not making a coat, I’m exorcising a demon!”

“Yeah, but there’s still a dog inside.”

Jess grimaced. “Look Chowder, maybe the imp is struggling to possess the dog. But animals don’t survive possessions.”

“What do you mean?”

“Animals don’t have white souls. If they get possessed they die, after the demons leaves them. Willing or exorcised, they just die. We don’t really have a choice here.”

“Dude…” Chowder said staring at him. “What happened to you? Is this what you’re really like?”

“Chowder!” Jess protested, struggling to defend himself. He fumbled for words but he couldn’t defend anything. “Okay… I'll keep it. take it back to school with me.”

“You won't kill him?”

“No.” Jess said. “I'm just going to get expelled and thrown in prison trying to sneak this little shit in. But if my dad asks. Dead. The demon is dead got it?”

“Dude of course!” Chowder said in relief. “But what about Miss Batsy?”

Jess flipped Chowder’s couch back over and flopped down on it.

"Are you cleaning up?”

Jess didn't hear what Chowder asked as he closed his eyes.

"Whah?" Jess asked.

“Nothing.” Chowder laughed, flopping down on the couch too as the dog started humping a pillow.

"Aw, yeah. Take it take it." It squeaked.

"That thing has brain rot now." Chowder stared.

Jess snorted. "That's a good name for it."

Brainrot.

"Hey, Jess.” Chowder said. “Thanks for saving me, man."

"Don’t be dumb, of course I’d come.”

“No, it’s not just that.” Chowder said. “You didn’t know that I knew about magic. But you were going to tell me anyway. You saved me first, you didn’t hesitate.”

Jess shrugged. “Didn't have a choice.” Jess uncovered his eyes. “But anyway, dad thinks something latched onto you at our house, he said he’ll take care of it so you'll be safe now."

Chowder turned pale and didn’t answer.

Hmm...

"Chowder...” Jess said, mischievously. “I have a dorm back at school.”

"You sleep in dorms there?"

"Yeah.” Jess said, sitting up straighter... “Guess who I'm bunking with?"

"Dude, I'm not psychic."

Jess grinned, and said the one thing that would change Chowder’s entire horrible day:

"Twins."

"NO WAY! TWINS! NO WAY" Chowder yelled leaping of the couch. "Magic twins! Twin witches!"

Brainrot snarled and grunted. “Twins…”

"Yeah, Brainrot!" Chowder whooped.

“Twins… Good to kill…”

"No… Brainrot..." Chowder deflated.

Jess laughed, and nearly slipped of the couch.

“Dude, dude take me with you!" Chowder begged.

“I wish I could. That place is dead without you." Jess complained.

“So what do you do there? Are you like an Inquisitor like your dad?” Chowder asked.

"Dude, I’m in highschool.”

"Yeah, but like magic High School! Don't you like learn to raise the dead and shit! Mind control?

Jess shrugged. “I can buy self-washing dishes?”

“That’s even coolder!”

Jess laughed, but Chowder suddenly stopped.

"Dude, it's two I clock. My mom's going to be home by four. How am I going to clean all this?"

Jess sighed, and reached into his pocket. "This is my emergency card. I don't spend too much human money so there should be plenty saved. You go and get a chihuahua from a pet store, for Miss Batsy. If you can’t get one get a rat or something. She won’t know. I’ll clean up here, and head back to school after.”

Chowder stared in bewilderment. “You can clean up all this? Will you use magic?”

“Some magic, some handy andy.” Jess said, stretching and waking up. “Oh, and there’ll be a long metal like surfboard outside the building just leave it on the side for me, okay?”

“No, problem.” Chowder said, jogging lightly to the door. “Hey Jess, can I call you at school?”

Jess gave a small sad smile. “No electronics in the wizarding world.”

“Oh… Well, when are you back?”

“Birthday.” Jess answered. “Come by the house that day.”

“Yeah. Okay... See you, Jess. Good luck with everything.” Chowder said, closing the door behind him.

"See you."

It must have been well over an hour later when he finally got home and finished all his packing. He was exhausted, sweaty and honestly just done with the day. But at least… He was packed and Chowder was safe. That was more than enough.

He stuffed Brainrot into a duffel bag with his stuff and headed up the stairs to the portal. He stumbled through the portal once again, with the yippity little Brainrot gnawing at something in he bag. God Jess was hungry- and no wonder! It must be well passed three now! He’d missed lunch, and he hadn’t ordered the fast food either.

He strolled into the office and surprisingly Miss Beazley crossed her arms and scowled at him.

Oooo, guess he was a little late? She had to keep the portal open the whole time. And she was on some crazy starvation diet too, so no wonder she was moody.

“Sorry, I’m late.” Jess yawned. “Got really busy with packing. You have no idea.” He grinned.

She grunted. “You missed your exam, Mr Goldwyn.”

Ah. Well. Shit.