Aka Amy

"Amy," my girlfriend stated in a quiet but firm voice. "You've put this off long enough. I appreciate the breakfast in bed and everything, and I get that you don't want me to worry? But I'd really like to know what happened to you last night."

"And the more you keep trying to avoid telling me, the more worried and suspicious I'm going to get," she added.

I gestured, "But I should at least put the dishes in the sink and give them a rinse. If we just leave them here something will get spilled, then we'll have to wash all the bedding too."

She gave me a hard look, and my shoulders sagged.

"Fine," I sighed. It was almost noon on Sunday, and I'd run out of excuses and diversions to help me avoid telling my girlfriend the truth about what happened last night.

I waved my hand and the dishes vanished. They appeared back in the kitchen, already spotless and ready to be put away. With another gesture both our mugs were refilled with fresh hot coffee, then I sat back down on the bed next to her.

At the same time a certain small tortoiseshell cat snuck into our bedroom then quietly hopped up onto the foot of our bed and sat down into a loaf. They'd been very curious to hear this story too, ever since Tess and I came back early from our double-date the night before.

Our dinner with Cassandra and Kaylee fizzled out not long after I returned. My sudden departure combined with Tess sensing something was wrong was enough to spoil the mood. Things became really awkward, so the younger goddess and her girlfriend decided to head back home as soon as we'd all finished eating.

And Tess had been bugging me ever since then to tell her exactly what happened, because she knew without any doubt that something did happen. And not just because I suddenly teleported away in the middle of a meal. Like my angel said, Theresa felt something when I died. My returning to dinner dressed in a translucent white gown didn't really help the situation either.

After a sip of my coffee I began, "So like I said last night, one of my worshippers was in trouble? It was Ada, she was praying to me in a panic. Her parents and an uncle were in the process of kidnapping her."

"Fuck," Tess frowned. "Is she ok? How did they even find her?"

I nodded, "She's fine. As for how they found her, it was her university that screwed up. From what I saw in the parents' minds, the school sent Ada some paperwork that included her new address, but they mailed it to the old address."

Then I went on to explain what I found when I arrived, along with some of the awful stuff Ada's family had planned for her.

By the time I was finished Tess was livid. "Goddess damn them! Ada's probably going to need therapy after all that. Maybe I should reach out to her again?"

"Sorry," she added after taking a deep breath to calm down. "So you saved her, then what happened?"

I sighed and shook my head, "This is where it might get difficult to hear, ok? The bottom line is I got careless, and I made a mistake. Remember how I've said all along how my body was mortal? That I could potentially get sick or hurt, and that's why I had to eat and I still aged and all that stuff? Well..."

Both Tess and Siggy were completely quiet for the next several minutes, as I calmly explained how I didn't think to check for Ada's mother and didn't bother protecting my back. I told them how the woman snuck up behind me, armed with a hammer she picked up out of a toolbox someone left open next to the basement stairs. And I told them how she landed a very lucky and very lethal blow to the back of my head.

By that point Theresa's face was white as a sheet as she stared at me with a look of shock in her wide eyes.

"That's what I felt," she whispered. "It was like somehow I knew you weren't there anymore, but at the same time I knew you had to be. You're a goddess, you're immortal, so I know you couldn't be gone."

I sighed, "I'm sorry love. I never meant to scare you like that."

After another gulp of my coffee I continued with the story. I told Tess how I ended up in my heavenly realm with Raven, but quickly realized I needed to get back to the mortal realm. I told her I created a replacement body for myself then returned to Ada's place, but I didn't mention yet how my new body was different.

"So what did you do to her parents?" Tess asked nervously. "You didn't...?"

I nodded slowly, "I did. I smote her mother and her uncle. It was instant and painless, neither of them suffered. As for her father, he felt remorse? He questioned and doubted what they were doing before-hand, and he felt guilt about it afterwards. So I spared his life and sent him home, but forbade him from contacting Ada in any way. Then I made sure Ada was ok, before heading back to the restaurant."

My girlfriend let out a long slow sigh as all that sank it. She was quiet for several seconds as she seemed to think it all over, then finally nodded. "Ok Amy. Thank you for telling me. I don't know how I feel, knowing you killed two people? But I accept that something had to be done. And I'm glad you're alright, and that you were able to save Ada."

I wasn't looking forward to the next part but I knew I had to come clean about the rest of it. So I gave Tess an apologetic smile as I warned her, "There's more. I need to tell you something else."

Another little frown settled on her face as she asked warily, "What is it?"

"That visit to the heavens changed me in two ways," I responded quietly. "First, I got all my old memories back. Of my existence as Amethyst I mean? The millennia I lived as her, all that's back now and it's just as real to me as the thirty-five years I lived as Amy Sullivan and the last twenty-two years I've been Amy Price."

Her eyes widened slightly but she didn't respond right away, so I continued.

"And second," I stated softly, "The new body I created for myself is immortal. I won't age anymore, and I no longer need to eat food. I'll never get sick, and nothing short of another deity can hurt me."

"Oh," she mumbled quietly. Her eyes drifted down until she was staring at the bedspread, then she asked nervously "So what does that mean, for us? Are we still together? Are we still engaged? Or... Are you telling me you have to move on or something?"

I shook my head as I tried to reassure her, "Nothing of the sort Tess. I promise. I'm not leaving you, I'm definitely not moving on. It doesn't mean anything more than what I just said. The not aging thing isn't going to be an issue for a few years, but it will eventually."

She asked, "What about the other thing? The memories, I mean. Are you still Amy? Or are you Amethyst now?"

"I'm still your Amy," I told her. "I don't think I changed substantially when I got access to my memories as Amy Sullivan last summer, right? This is sort of the same thing. And it's not like the older memories were completely lost to me before, it was just harder to dig stuff up? Now it's all right there."

Tess finally had a sip of her coffee as she thought through everything I'd just told her. Eventually she looked up at me and asked, "So does this mean you and Amethyst have merged or fused together or something? There's just the one of you now that you've absorbed all her memories and experiences?"

Despite the seriousness of the conversation I still had to resist smiling or laughing at that point. I managed to maintain a neutral expression as I told her, "There were never two of us Tess. Or three of us if you're counting Amy Sullivan as well."

I continued, "The Amy Amethyst thing was just an act, remember? You and I discussed that before we started helping people? Raven said the same thing, that when I was doing goddess stuff I had to act like a goddess."

"Ok maybe I shouldn't have played it up as much when it was just the two of us," I admitted. "But I figured it was good practice if I maintained that act whenever I was in 'goddess mode'. It's always just been me though love. Like I've said all along, there's nobody else in my head, no voices, no-one here but me."

Theresa's expression slowly shifted into a frown as I spoke, and by the time I was finished she was staring at me with a troubled look on her face. "Even on the full moons and your holidays, that was just you acting? That's not Amethyst taking over? What about the thing with the cookies? Amethyst said she didn't like them, but you said they're your favourite."

"Sorry," I grimaced. "It's always just been me. The cookie thing was just me being coy about keeping some divine secrets? The truth is I don't consume that stuff like a human, I sort of absorb it magically? It's an offering, it's like top-quality jet-fuel for gods."

"I see," she frowned slightly, then focused on her coffee for a bit.

It was another minute or so before she finally apologized, "I'm sorry Amy. I guess I was reading too much into it? I know we talked about you putting on an act for other people, but it never occurred to me you were doing that for me as well. I was all but convinced you were plural."

"I even spoke to Emma at work about you," she admitted with a blush. "She's studied plurality and she knows loads more than I do on the subject."

We were both quiet again, and I was positive we both felt awkward about that whole situation. The two of us sipped our coffee in silence as we both seemed to be contemplating the situation. There were definitely a few things I had on my mind, but one stood out. Now that I'd gone ahead and made myself properly immortal I couldn't help thinking about what that would mean for my girlfriend and I.

"So um," I started awkwardly, "I know we've only briefly touched on this in the past Tess, but I'm pretty sure I could make you an immortal body too? So you wouldn't age, you wouldn't get sick, and you couldn't get hurt or killed. You'd probably still need to eat since you wouldn't be gaining power from worshippers like I do, but I don't think that's a big drawback?"

By the time I stopped talking she was staring wide-eyed at me again.

"You want to make me immortal?" she asked quietly.

I shook my head, "I'm offering. If you're interested. It's not about what I want love. I'm thinking ahead though? Since I'm not going to age anymore, I'll be twenty-two years old forever. I can imagine that'll become an issue in a decade or two?"

"It might also come up if we eventually decide to have children," I added. "I know that's several years down the road, but like I said, I'm thinking ahead."

Tess continued watching me for a few seconds as she seemed to be thinking it through. She asked, "Can you change yourself again now? Like I mean, make yourself shorter or taller or whatever? Or is this new form locked or sealed or something?"

"I can change it," I replied. "If that's what you're getting at, I could probably fake aging by making incremental changes every so often? But I won't age naturally anymore. And that would apply to you as well, if we did it for you too. You wouldn't be locked into one specific form, things can always be changed later? But it'd be a deliberate action, not something that happened by itself."

She nodded slowly, "I see."

There was a long pause while she slowly drained the rest of her coffee. Then she set the empty mug aside and sighed, "I need to think it over Amy. I appreciate the offer, I'm glad you're thinking about this stuff? But yeah. It feels like a big decision and I'm not prepared to make it right now."

"Of course," I gave her a warm smile. "I wasn't expecting an answer right this moment."

The smile faded after a few seconds as I continued, "To be honest Tess I have a lot of new baggage that's going to take some time for me to process. I suddenly have another three thousand years worth of memories and experiences in my head, and while a lot of them were positive there's also quite a few that aren't. After all, there's a reason I was dormant for so long before Mary woke me."

My girlfriend gave me a worried look, "Oh Amy I'm sorry, I didn't even think about that. I'm here for you ok, if you want to talk about anything?"

"Thanks love," I replied.

"I'm here for you as well," Siggy added. The cat had been absolutely silent the whole time Tess and I were talking, and hadn't moved from their little loaf at the foot of the bed. "If you want or need to talk to a sympathetic deity about any of this stuff, you can count on me Amethyst."

I smiled at the little torty, "Thank you Siggy I'll keep that in mind."

"Wait, three thousand years?" Tess gasped a moment later as the number finally hit her.

I nodded, "Roughly. Obviously we weren't using our modern Gregorian calendar back then, but it was approximately nine-fifty BCE when I ascended."

Tess stared at me with wide eyes as she mumbled, "Wow."

"Yeah," I grimaced. Then my expression fell as I let out a sigh, "I'm going to have to spend some time with Raven as well. Now that I remember everything about her past, there's a few things she and I need to discuss."

Tess frowned, "My offer stands for both of you, I'm here to help if either of you need me. Or if you'd rather speak with a professional I can recommend someone. I'm not sure how Emma would feel about supernatural clients, but at least she's familiar with the concept."

That made me smile, "We'll see. For now I think I'm going to get myself another coffee, then maybe spend some time out on the balcony. Alone, if you don't mind? Like I said, I have a lot to process."

"Of course cutie," she replied as she leaned close enough for the two of us to share a hug and kiss.