ALL NOVEL Chapter 76
Maren Burstian had once heard from a knight long ago.
He lived burdened by guilt, believing that he had lost his family to an outsider.
He felt as though everything was pointless and wondered what he was even doing with his life.
But now, when he found out it was just that their paths had crossed, and when he heard about their family being alive and finally reuniting…
Although his heart was filled with joy and happiness, tears just flowed down like drip, drop.
“Ah.”
“Deputy Director.”
At that moment, Maren didn’t understand, but he could empathize with those words more than anyone else.
As he watched the Knight Commander, holding her cheeks with both hands and wearing a wistful smile, tears flowed freely from his eyes without invitation.
“What a sight this is. Are the knights not listening to you?”
“Commander….”
“Haha, it’s the second time I’ve seen the Deputy Director cry. Was I that happy to see you?”
This had to be a fiction.
Yes, a fabrication.
Even though he knew that, his body reacted first.
The cold voice of the Knight Commander that he had heard just a moment ago was now replaced by something far more vivid.
“Is it really you, Commander?”
“To think there are two of me in this world, what a calamity it must be for the outsiders.”
The Knight Commander said with a playful smile.
Only the Knight Commander could make such a joke in this world.
“Commander, sob.”
“…Deputy Director. You’ve gone through a lot.”
The Knight Commander opened her arms wide and embraced Maren.
Every time she patted his back with one hand, his body trembled greatly in response.
Through that, the Knight Commander could feel how deeply Maren cared for her.
“Don’t cry so disgracefully. You are a truly strong knight, the only one I acknowledge.”
“…Commander, I’m sorry, Commander….”
The Knight Commander listened quietly to Maren’s words, wearing an apologetic smile.
She wondered how much emotional turmoil he had endured in her absence.
How many sacrifices had he made, how much patience had he exercised?
And how could he, so strong, have crumbled like this?
“…The one who should feel sorry is me, Deputy Director.”
“No, if I had articulated my reasoning better to persuade you, Commander….”
“Why do you twist your thoughts like that? Ultimately, my decision to go to the Snow Mountain was my own.”
Hearing the Knight Commander’s words made Maren feel even more dizzying as the memories of that moment flooded back, rendering him speechless.
Wasn’t this merely a dream at this point?
Rationalizing himself like this…
Then…
“Maren, you are blaming yourself without even considering the Knight Commander’s feelings.”
“…Consider?”
“Did the Knight Commander leave you that task hoping you’d harbor such thoughts?”
Tanton’s voice struck Maren’s ear.
What kind of feelings had the Knight Commander entrusted him with?
“…Of course….”
“No, you still don’t understand, Maren. You haven’t even grasped the God of War’s heart.”
As Tanton’s words reached him, Maren felt a dazed sensation wash over him.
“They must have known they were going to die.”
Hearing that, Maren could take no more.
“Does that even make sense? If they knew they were going to die, why on earth would they act so recklessly?”
“…They hoped their actions would serve as an example, that they wouldn’t fear challenging what lay ahead.”
Maren had no further responses to Tanton’s words.
“By their sacrifice, they sought to enable the knights to believe it was possible, not to flee from the outsiders! Even so, they wanted the knights to take a step forward!”
Maren didn’t understand the Knight Commander’s thoughts.
That might have just been a pinnacle of extremism.
But he had surmised that she might have thought something along those lines.
Even as they embarked on the expedition to the Snow Mountain, she had been moving forward while wearing a bittersweet smile.
The God of War, too, had been laughing loudly, almost excessively.
By their sacrifice.
They firmly believed that the knights would take even one step forward.
Everything just begins with a single challenging step.
Their monumental first stride would ignite the hearts of those with brave knightly spirit.
“You are effectively disregarding the Knight Commander’s will, Maren. If you break here!”
Maren’s eyes lit up.
“The God of War! The Knight Commander! And the 68 knights!”
He then seemed to realize something significant.
“It would be akin to making their sacrifices meaningless, wouldn’t it?”
Tanton’s piercing words struck into Maren’s head like an arrow.
Only then did he become aware of the actions he had been contemplating.
“…What a selfish action I have….”
He could not forgive himself.
Even though the Knight Commander had believed in him and entrusted everything to the future.
He had not utilized that as a stepping stone but instead turned it into a dark chapter in the knights’ history.
“Ah. Commander… what have I done….”
“It’s alright, Deputy Director!”
At that moment, Maren felt a sense of relief wash over him from the voice of a man.
Turning to face that voice behind him, he found himself gasping for breath upon recognizing who it was.
“Isn’t it enough that you’ve realized it now? I won’t forgive you for allowing your knighthood to crumble for such a reason!”
“…God of War.”
“Haha, what in the world is that face! It’s not like you, Deputy Director! Stand tall!”
As the God of War’s words finished, the sound of countless footsteps resonated rhythmically behind him.
When the footsteps eventually ceased, numerous fallen knights stood behind the God of War.
“Deputy Director! Hang in there!”
“Honestly, I think the Deputy Director is more capable than the Commander….”
“What kind of nonsense is that, Michael! That’s not how you offer reassurance!”
“Haha, you lot! To think we would come to cheer up the strong Deputy Director! Now that truly is a joke!”
The knights shared banter amongst themselves and burst into hearty laughter.
They must have suffered greatly, feeling painful and scared, dying alone in that bitter chill.
How could they manage to laugh like that?
With the Deputy Director still in shock, the Knight Commander stepped close and rested her head on his shoulder.
As Maren stiffened, she let out a small laugh.
“It was my fault for not providing you adequate explanations. I must have been scared too. Perhaps I acted this way because I wanted you to think of me as a cold-hearted person.”
That voice of the Knight Commander trembled faintly, and Maren was taken aback.
He knew that voice bore the traces of tears.
“If I simply labeled it as my sacrifice, it felt like I would have to bear the heavy responsibility of the future. I thought it might ease that burden if you felt betrayal instead. So I admit it’s foolish of me.”
What a generous woman she was.
In such a rough manner, how could she be so delicate in this respect?
Maren gritted his teeth and shook his head.
“Deputy Director. As per your thoughts, the God of War and the other seniors might never return. However.”
At that moment, someone stepped forward beside him.
It was Tanton.
“I assured you I’d bring back at least the Commander, didn’t I? There’s still hope. Someday, I may embrace you even larger than anyone else. We’ve already moved past the starting point. It just means we need to find the way.”
“…You’re right, Tanton.”
Tanton’s lengthy speech finally stirred something within Maren.
Yes, there were still many tasks ahead.
The knight who had appeared like a comet, Tanton, had yet to be elevated to a high position.
He hadn’t even saved Rondan.
And.
He hadn’t restored the Knight Commander to her former state.
The White Mask especially despised the return of the Knight Commander, who had caused everyone to die under irrational orders.
Of course, this was all but a dream; it was hard to tell if the Knight Commander actually thought like that.
Therefore, he vowed he would find out.
What thought process led to those actions?
And he would feel resentful.
Why had she abandoned him?
And…
He would definitely reunite with her.
With the woman who had first made his heart tremble.
“Commander, please wait for me.”
Maren knelt on one knee before the smiling Knight Commander.
To show his loyalty.
“I will ensure your restoration. And I will see to it that you will receive happiness as much as you sacrificed. So.”
With eyes filled with resolution, Maren looked at the Knight Commander.
“Please wait just until then.”
The Knight Commander watched Maren closely and nodded slowly.
With an expression that hinted both sadness and willingness.
Maren rose from his position.
The cowardly Maren of before was now gone.
Only a noble knight remained, reborn with a healthy mind to restore the woman he cherished and to achieve his goals.
“This isn’t the time to be here. There’s an avalanche of tasks to tackle.”
With those final words from Maren, his spirit began to shine brightly.
#
“Hmm.”
He opened his eyes.
Maren immediately scanned his surroundings and recognized he was back in the Knights’ headquarters and his own room.
He glanced to the side.
“Mm?”
There was the Knight Commander, someone both seen and unseen in his dreams.
She was peering at him with simple eyes, totally devoid of the usual charisma and willpower.
At first, seeing her like that had thrown him into despair.
“Ha.”
Well, what of it.
Whatever the case, she remained the Knight Commander of Rondan.
That one fact had not changed.
“Commander.”
“Oh, are you going to eat?”
At the Knight Commander’s words, the Deputy Director smiled softly.
“Yes, Commander. Shall we go have a meal?”
“This time, I’d like some meat.”
“I know a great restaurant nearby.”
With that, Maren Burstian, the Deputy Director, walked alongside the Knight Commander.