Draka

We gave it two days before we left to deal with the trolls. I spent most of that time watching Kesra’s home, only returning to the inn to check in with people and to rest. In those two days I never saw Kesra or the Blossom come or go, though I did see Kesra on her balcony and in her garden once or twice, so I knew that she was there. She always had at least one guard with her and jumped at shadows, though she didn’t let that stop her from going outside. I kind of admired that. It was too bad that she had the sister she did.

When I was at the inn I stayed in the cellar, sleeping or practicing my reading while doing my best to ignore the Need. Reading materials came in both books and scrolls, with books being by far the more expensive, and you could easily tell how much more care was put into them. Scrolls rarely had illustrations, and the ones I’d seen were sloppy things, nothing like the careful full color art in my bestiary. No, scrolls were clearly churned out as quickly as they could, intended for consumption. Almost everything that might be called pure entertainment was on scrolls. Herald had a sizable collection of those, which she left with me in the strongroom as she went out. She had Tam with her for safety, but I got the distinct impression that the scrolls were partially there to distract me from her excursions.

I didn't let it bother me. I knew that she wouldn't hide anything too important, and it amused me no end that, in her haste, she’d forgotten to sort out her collection of “romance” scrolls before bringing the lot to me.

I tried to dreamwalk, but nothing. People came and went as they wished and could, and I managed to speak with pretty much everyone: my new family, the Wolves, Ardek and Kira, even Barro made an appearance late the second night, and I took the opportunity to thank and praise him for the good work he’d been doing. He seemed to enjoy that, though he also admitted that Mak had been paying him “well enough,” no sum mentioned. I didn’t ask. I’d rather not know.

The rain let up the evening after I’d visited Kesra, and then we gave it another day to get our guards ready. The Family agreed: we had no control over whether the Blossom would try anything, but we couldn’t let that control our lives. We’d take what precautions we could, and then trust the Mercies and sisterly love that nothing would happen. Ardek was tasked to keep an eye on the house without being obvious. I still expected the Blossom to move her sister somewhere, and I’d like to know where, but it wasn’t like Ardek’s minions were the height of professionalism.

On the morning of the third day we set out, me Shifting and taking the sewers out of the city and the Family walking with Stalwart the mule and their packs. Stalwart was mostly loaded down with big clay jugs, carried in net slings and full of some reagent, in which we’d collect the trolls’ blood. Each was the size of a small keg, but with the size of the average troll and with five trolls that needed killing, that looked about right. Anything smaller would have been silly, and we had eight of the things. With the relative rarity of trolls’ blood, Mak told me, they’d negotiated a price of fifty eagles per filled jar, and since they’d only needed to pay a deposit on the jars and the reagent, they’d grabbed extra just in case.

We met at the edge of the forest, and then we were truly on our way. Everyone was wearing noticeably heavier clothing than the last time we’d gone north, and when I thought about it that had been true of almost everyone I’d seen for a while now. It had just been so gradual that I hadn’t thought about it, and while I’d seen the leaves slowly shift I hadn’t noticed the drop in temperature. It really drove home that we were heading into autumn now, with what they called first harvest giving way to second planting.

Traffic on the Forest Road was unusually heavy, and even though I stayed in the trees I frequently had to go deeper or even Shift as we met groups of travelers coming in the opposite directions. Two of the groups we met were clearly refugees, ragged people in low spirits traveling with all their possessions. We didn’t know where they were going, and we didn’t stop them to ask.

Even two nights and a day after the rains had finally stopped the road was a churned, muddy mess. I pitied the humans and their boots; walking on all fours in the forest I almost never sank down anywhere, while my siblings were constantly cursing and struggling against the sucking mud. By the time we made it to the exit for the lake and the campground the decision to stop for the day was unanimous.

It felt oddly nostalgic, being back there, but also painful. I went down to the tree. This was where I’d first met Garal. This was where Herald had come to meet me when she felt abandoned by her family. And this was where Mak had betrayed me.

Herald joined me by the tree, and we talked a little about those early days, only months and yet a lifetime ago. When I mentioned the days that she’d spent waiting for me, she looked suddenly embarrassed.

“There is something I should confess,” she finally said after some prodding. “Do you remember back in the beginning? When you lost your horn?”

“Yeah. Not something I’m likely to forget.”

“I came out in the morning, after Mak had healed you. And when you scratched your head a chunk sort of… came off.”

“Again, something that’ll haunt my dreams until the end of my days.”

“And it startled you so much that you threw it at me, and I caught it. And I sort of… kept it?”

“Herald, I love you. But that’s disgusting. Why?”

“I thought I might not see you again! I guess I wanted something to remember you by, and then we became friends and it sort of became important to me, because I could not see you so often but I always had it to remind me of you, and—”

“All right! All right. Stop. Herald. That’s weird, and it’s gross, but oddly flattering, I guess. I get where you’re coming from, yeah? Just… Please, tell me you don’t still have it.”

“So, the thing about that…”

“Herald, no,” I pleaded.

“Well, the reason I thought of it now was that when I was here, waiting, I had it with me. And then again when we went north, like we are now. And when I was packing for this trip—”

“Oh, Herald,” I shook my head theatrically.

“Well, I could not find it. I have not even looked at it for so long that I do not know where I put it. I have not even thought about it, since I get to be with you so much, now. But, yeah. I supposed I wanted to confess that I… kept a piece of you. And I may have lost it. Or misplaced it.”

“You’re forgiven?” I wasn’t entirely sure how I felt about the whole thing. It was a worryingly stalkerish thing to do and it made me wonder how early I’d been in her head, but it wasn’t like it changed anything. She was still my little dragon. I had to make one thing clear, though. “Just, please, if you find it, burn it. Please! I don’t want to see it, or anything.”

“Yeah,” she said awkwardly. “I promise.”

Mak never went near the tree. As we were leaving I saw her look towards the path where she had lured me into the ambush. There was such regret in her eyes that I nearly told her that she was forgiven there and then. I wished that I could; I wanted so badly to forgive her. But the words would have been empty. I didn’t feel it. I still had that surge of anger whenever I thought about what she’d done, and until I dealt with that, I couldn’t honestly tell her what she wanted to hear.

I had no idea how to get myself to that point. I suspected that it wasn’t in my nature to forgive. My human side had been fairly unforgiving to start with, and the dragon…

Mak looked at me and gave me a weak smile. She was getting too damned good at reading me.

The second day was sunny, and the mud finally dried to the point where it only slowed everybody down a little. At Lalia’s request we took a detour to Pine Hill, only a few miles north of the lake, to check in on her family. To everyone’s relief nothing truly monstrous had been spotted in the area. The only sign of anything being wrong was that a few advanced animals had been seen, but no trolls or goblins or the like.

I made sure to ask Herald to bring Lahnie outside while “the grownups” talked. For once she had no problem with being treated as the junior member or the group, and Lahnie was beyond happy when she saw me. We both marveled at how big the other one had gotten. I had Herald lift her onto me back, and then walked around as she chattered excitedly about things Lalia had told her, and how her granddad had shown her how to carve a fox from wood, and how silly Soldier, her dog, had been. I barely got a word in.

It took the rest of the day to make it to the river. I recognised the sturdy stone bridge from when I’d been looking for Piter’s Clearing. From there we’d be following the river west through uncleared forest, with our destination about fifteen miles upstream.

The Need still called me north. I told the others about it and they all agreed that if I wanted to go, I should. But in the end it wasn’t so strong that I couldn’t resist it. It was never a compulsion, just an itch, and I stayed with them.

It took until noon the next day to reach Piter’s Clearing. About five miles in we started seeing signs of the trolls, which had everyone putting on their armor, and that made the going slower. Tam and Val were both still in the same old stuff I’d always seen them in, but Mak had gotten a suit of black leather scale to match Herald’s. Despite the situation I couldn’t help but grin at my two little dragons. The both of them looked absolutely lethal.

Then we hit a wide swamp, which turned out to run along much of the river. I hadn’t noticed it when I passed since I’d been flying at the time, and unlike the other, treeless wetlands I’d seen I hadn’t known what to look for. It took hours of soggy boots and uncountable mosquito bites before we found ourselves on the other side. It wasn’t like anyone blamed me for not warning them, but I couldn’t help but feel a little bit embarrassed about the whole thing. At least I could always go up and check how much farther we had to go, which kept spirits pretty high despite the rough going.

I left the group at the edge of the swamp to go check on the ruined village, though far enough away that the mozzies weren’t so bad. There was still plenty of daylight. In our limited experience the trolls only returned to their lair once the light began to fail, and we had no reason to think that this troupe would be any different. The trolls were all out, of course. That meant that there were at least five trolls roaming the area, which was all I’d wanted to confirm.

I returned to the family and reported what I’d seen, and then we set off. We needed to choose a place to camp, far enough away that the trolls were unlikely to disturb it but close enough that we wouldn’t have to trek for hours to hunt them. We’d settled on Sweet Creek. It was about three miles from Piter’s Clearing, across a quick stream that had to be forded, and had already been torn to pieces by the trolls. With any luck, all these factors would combine to make the trolls unlikely to go there. Besides that, I’d seen one building there with most of all four walls and a roof, making it a far better place to store our supplies than hanging them from a tree or something while we were away.

They were all pretty somber as we made our way through Piter’s clearing, keeping close to the river so that they wouldn’t have to look too closely. The grass was getting long around the ruined buildings, and the scattered debris left no doubt that something disastrous had happened here. At least the long, heavy rains had taken care of the blood.

We followed a path from the village to the ford. There was no bridge, and no sign that one had ever existed, but two thick ropes hung over the rushing waters. The water was normally shallow enough to cross, but with how swift and deep the stream was after the rains the family were all happy to have the ropes, as well as a member of the party who could fly across with their gear. Poor Stalwart had to brave the waters the hard way, and he did so only under loud, braying protest and with lots of coaxing. In the end, though, everyone and everything got across.

We made it barely three hundred feet from the stream before we came across our first troll. So much for the water keeping them away.

As soon as we got away from the water we heard crunching, snapping and rustling sounds that made us cautious, but Herald was the one to spot her and stop us. A small clearing was almost entirely overgrown by some kind of bramble bearing small, red berries, and the troll was tearing entire branches out of the ground and crunching them down, thorns and all. From the churned soil we could tell that she’d made her way through quite a lot of the stuff. It was honestly kind of impressive, but also cemented trolls in my mind as nature’s garbage disposals.

There was no discussion about if we were going for it, only a quick brainstorm about how we’d approach it. Our plan of attack, in the end, was simple: Mak and I would circle around to the left. When we were in position, Herald would start loosing arrows, with Tam and Val between her and the troll. The moment the troll started moving, either to attack or retreat, me and Mak would hit it from the side, tie it up, and let Tam come in to do the real damage with his magically charged sword strikes.

When we were getting into position, Mak moved like a wraith through the undergrowth. With my Stealth helping her and her agility, smaller body and lower weight, I was pretty sure that she was less visible and making less noise than I was. I felt jealous and extremely pleased all at once.

When we were in position and ready to strike, Mak raised her spear in the air to signal the others.

It took barely a second for the first of Herald’s enchanted arrows to find its mark, sinking deep into the troll’s back. The creature jerked and stumbled, seemingly in confusion rather than pain for the first few seconds. When a second arrow took it near the spine it gave off a wailing roar, rounding to see two humans ready to meet it and a third with an arrow already nocked, bow taut as she aimed.

The third arrow took the troll high in the throat as it charged. It never reached Tam and Val, though. The moment the troll started moving Mak and I exploded out of the bushes, Mak digging in her feet and driving her spear into the troll’s hip up to the wings as I leapt onto her torso, bringing her crashing down ten feet from them. She landed on Herald’s food-for-a-year arrow which, instead of breaking, continued right through her neck under her weight. The damn thing almost got me in the process!

That wasn’t enough to kill her, but she was dazed and injured enough that finishing her off was almost a formality, with Herald quickly grabbing one of the large jugs and Tam waiting to take her head off until the jug was ready.

Collecting the blood was just as messy as I’d imagined. Trying to actually maneuver the carcass so that more of the stuff hit the target than not was almost impossible, but we still managed to get one jug full and another halfway. Val, who was the only one who’d done this before, was very pleased with the result as he cleaned the jugs and sealed the full one with wax. “A troll must normally be worn down, as we all know, and killing them without cutting the head off is risky and difficult. To get more than a jug from a single troll is better than I’d expected!”

All in all everyone was very happy with how our first fight of the expedition turned out. None of us got hurt, Herald’s arrows performed just as she’d hoped, Mak got to show off her new strength, and we had gallons of troll blood. Nobody even had to get their clothes too messy, since I was the one holding the jars. I could just dunk myself in the stream, and then quickly Shift when the men weren’t looking.

We got out of there as soon as we were ready, just in case the noise had attracted another troll. No one wanted a repeat of the Big Boy incident.

As I led the short remaining way to what remained of Sweet Creek, I thought about the fact that I was still keeping secrets from Tam and Val. I’d told Herald and Mak that I’d tell them, but I just never felt comfortable with it. It bothered me, but just like with forgiving Mak, something was holding me back from trusting them completely, and I wasn’t sure what or why. The first thing that popped into my mind, the first possible reason, was fairly obvious once it occurred to me. It came back to Mak. Mak had known as much about me as Tam or Val did now, and that might be the only reason that I was still alive, and they were free.

But while that felt like a perfectly valid reason, it didn't feel right. I tried to think of any kind of trait or behavior in either man that might make me distrust them, but I couldn't think of anything. From what I could tell both of them respected and liked me, and they had made no secret of their gratitude for my part in both making them rich, and in freeing our sisters. Besides that, I trusted Herald and Mak to let me know if the men voiced any concerns, to protect everyone involved.

So, there was nothing about Tam or Val themselves that stopped me from just letting them know. The reason had to be with me. I thought about who I’d revealed my powers to, and who I hadn’t. Those who were still alive, that was. My best theory, after some pondering, was that it came down to control.

I had only shown my powers to one person because I wanted to: Herald. I knew in my bones that she would never do anything to hurt me. If I asked her to do something, she’d do it, unless it hurt those she loved. Probably. I hadn’t had a reason to test that. So, though my feelings on it were as mixed as ever, I had more than a little control over Herald. About as much as she had over me.

No, that wasn’t true. If she asked me to kill someone, I would ask if she was sure, and then I’d do it no matter who it was.

Everyone else who knew about my powers did so because I hadn’t felt that I had an option. Mak had been there when I had to Shift to get free, and I hadn’t bothered to try to hide what I was doing because I hadn’t been sure if I was going to let her live or not. I’d told her about my past later on, but only when I felt like I controlled her completely. With Ardek it had been the same as with Mak. When I Shifted in front of Kira I’d been too distraught to think, and I’d kept her firmly under my thumb since. Rib and Pot might have been avoidable. I could have dropped them off somewhere safe and gone down through the tunnels myself. But again, I hadn’t been thinking entirely clearly. My only objective had been to keep everyone safe. Rib and Pot had sworn a pretty serious oath before I showed them, true, but I knew that I wouldn't have done it if I didn’t feel like I had to. I liked them. I really did. And I liked Garal and Tam and Val. But that wasn’t enough.

My conclusion was that I needed to have near absolute control of the person, or a lack of control of the situation. Otherwise I would never choose to reveal my secrets, and that was that.

When we reached Sweet Water the mood again turned somber. The creek bubbled peacefully, down a gentle slope. Birds sang and bugs buzzed. It was peaceful. With the sun and the breeze, it should have been nice. The hamlet was much as I’d last found it. In the ten days since I’d been here the grass had grown a little taller, and the wind and rain had caused a little more damage. A fox fled as we entered the center of the small community. Homes gaped empty, entire walls staved in, and birds perched on collapsed roofs. And it was hard to walk into a place where you knew that much of the community had died. The way they’d gone was just plain awful to think about, and as though to remind us, here and there clean-picked bones lay where they’d been discarded, bright in the sunlight.

We stood before the mostly intact house that had been someone’s home. Mak swallowed thickly, and in a voice that was almost a whisper, as though she was afraid to disturb the silence in this dead place, she said, “Right. Let’s get ready to kill these bastards.”