Dreams of Stardom (Hollywood SI)

After my failed attempt at getting Spielberg to change the climax of the film, days went on normally. Or as normally as they could go on a film set. Steven had taken it upon himself to praise me to heaven and back whenever I would do a good scene. One thing I noticed was that all that praise was solely focused on me alone. He never went out of his way to praise the adults as much as me, even if they had given master performances, which led me to believe that I received praise only because of my age.

It was frustrating to come to that conclusion, yet I did nothing to stop Steven. Despite not knowing how much of that praise was warranted, I liked hearing positive things. Who doesn’t? That led to today when I was finally doing the underwater scene in the pool.

The original plan was for the team to shoot this scene first, but because of my exams, I couldn’t take diving lessons, which had to be arranged between shooting days whenever my schedule was free.

“Do you all understand the scene, kids?” Steven asked around the pool area where I and six other boys in and around my age range were standing. Seeing everyone’s resolute nods, Steven grinned, “Good, take your positions then.”

Five of the boys jumped into the pool and started playing with a beach ball. The sixth boy, Jake, who played my ‘brother’ Martin, sat on the edge of the pool.

“Action!”

Hearing Steven’s command, I walked on over to Martin with a big box in my hand. I had quite gotten used to the way David walked and talked, the only difference today was that I was wearing just a pair of swim shorts.

“Happy Birthday, Martin,” I smiled while crouching down with the box still in my grasp. “I made this for you.”

Then one of the older boys swam to the poolside and asked Martin, “Is this him? Is this your little brother?”

“Technically, no,” Martin replied in an irritated tone.

The other boy climbed out of the pool and stood in front of me, “He’s Mecha.”

“What’s Mecha?” I asked innocently.

“We’re organic,” he began explaining as slowly as possible. “You’re mecha-anical.” He circled me as other kids started climbing out of the water as well. He pointed to himself, “Orga.” Then he pointed at me, “Mecha. Orga. Mecha. Orga. Mecha.” He kept pointing between us.

“Todd, stop!” Martin pushed Todd’s hand away.

“I didn’t even know they made little kids,” Todd commented offhandedly. “Can you pee?”

“I cannot,” I replied happily, not perceiving the borderline hostile tone the kid was using.

Another taller boy came closer to me, “Then let’s see what you can’t pee with.” He bent over my front section, making everyone else laugh.

“Guys, come on,” Martin chided them.

“Touch it,” another boy touched my shoulder in curiosity. “It feels so real.” Suddenly all the kids were touching my chest, back, or arms in amazement.

“That’s creepy.” “It feels so real.” “That is so real.” “Mecha-real.”

Todd came in front of me again, “Does he have DAS?” When others were clueless about it, he explained further, “Damage Avoidance System. DAS. It’s a pain alert system. Our serving man has it. Watch this.” He led me by hand to a poolside table where he picked up a big knife, which he turned towards me, “Now I’m not gonna cut you. This won’t hurt. I’m not gonna cut your skin. Just tell me when you feel it.”

That’s when I knew something wasn’t right as I nearly jumped up in surprise and rushed behind my supposed brother, “Keep me safe, Martin. Keep me safe.” I held him tightly for dear life.

“Let me go!” Martin protested loudly.

“Keep me safe, Martin.” I kept repeating the same phrase while backing away from the people who had threatened me.

“Let me go! MOM!” Martin yelled for his mother in utter panic.

Uncaring of Martin’s yells, I backed away a few more steps and unexpectedly fell into the pool, with Martin still in my grasp.

I kept my eyes open and my grip tight as three men jumped into the water, trying to get Martin free, which they were successful in doing after a few seconds. I was left lying on the bottom of the pool as the worried parents were tending to their son.

I didn’t hear the command to cut the scene, but I knew that I was running out of air, so I quickly swam up to the surface. I panted a bit as I took in fresh air after what was probably a full minute, maybe more. Safety guys were quickly upon me, pulling me out of the pool.

“Are you okay?” asked one of the guys.

“Yeah,” I nodded in between deep breaths. “Underwater shooting is intense.”

“It is,” the safety guy confirmed.

“Troy,” Steven came towards me. “Are you feeling fine?”

“Yes,” I gave him a reassuring nod. “Do we need a retake?”

Steven’s guilty look told me everything, yet he said, “Unfortunately. Don’t worry too much though, we’ll try to hurry it along. Dialogues came out perfectly. You just have to fall in the pool. But since you’re wet already, let’s do the underwater scenes first.”

“Okay,” I nodded as the actor playing Martin swam up to me, retaking his position in front of me as I held and hid behind him.

That day I found that doing underwater scenes is one of the worst things to do when you are forced to do a single scene a dozen times, but underwater. If I ever get a choice again, I would not do another film with underwater scenes. And then I remembered that [Harry Potter] films have quite a few underwater scenes for me, starting from the fourth film in the Triwizard Tournament and going all the way up to the last film where Harry, Ron, and Hermione jump into a lake after riding a dragon.

sigh

I thought it would be a relatively easier profession, but now I know how difficult acting can be. Especially in one of these big-budget extravaganzas, even if it is not about magic. The only good part about finishing the underwater scenes was that that was the last scene of the whole film, meaning I was finally done shooting [AI].

Unlike what I had wanted, Steven didn’t shoot an alternate ending for the film. I didn’t like it, but I couldn’t do anything about it either. You can’t win all your battles all the time. And this wasn’t even a battle to begin with.

As much as that bothered me, I didn’t have the time to worry about it needlessly. I wanted to relax for a few days, laying in bed all day, not doing anything at all, but my greedy ass, who took up more films than was practical made sure that I didn’t have any time left in my schedule for R&R. Not to mention, I still had to study for my A-Levels, which were the final exams in the UK for finishing my education formally.

As soon as filming of [AI] wrapped up, I was picked up in a private plane and paraded all around the States to do interviews for the first [Harry Potter] film. Emma Watson and Jamie Bell were flown from the UK along with a few more cast members like Robbie Coltrane, Michael Gambon, Maggie Smith, and Alan Rickman. Thankfully, I was paired with Emma and Jamie mostly to do the interviews. It’s so much easier to be the star of the interview when you are among kids.

 

(Break)

 

“Today, we have a very talented young guest with us here. Already an Oscar winner and a superstar at the mere age of 11 and the face of one of the biggest movies of the year, [Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone]. Please welcome, Troy Armitage!”

I walked on stage confidently while waving at the crowd, who went crazy as soon as they saw me. People literally stood up and were waving in my direction vigorously. Despite finding it a little creepy, I just smiled and walked over to the host for the night, David Letterman.

“Welcome, Troy,” David smiled at me while offering me a seat.

“Thanks for having me here,” I shot back with an equally pleased grin after taking the offered seat.

“It’s nice to have you here. So, how has your experience been in New York City so far?” David asked conversationally.

“It’s amazing,” I said honestly. “Don’t tell this to anyone, but I prefer New York over Los Angeles.”

Letterman looked amused, “You know that now everyone will know, right?”

I shrugged, “It’s true.”

“Anyway,” Letterman changed the subject. “I attended an early screening of your upcoming film, [Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone], and I have to say, this is the best children’s film I have ever seen. You acted beautifully, as usual.”

“Thank you,” I said graciously. “I would give that credit to my dad, Steve Kloves, and our director, Chris Columbus. They made the whole process very smooth. Not for a moment did I feel uncomfortable being on that set.”

“So did working for your father make the filming easier than, say, [The Sixth Sense]?”

“Hmm,” I thought about the question for a few moments. “Not necessarily. It’s like comparing apples with oranges. The only big help that Dad provides me that he won’t for other kids is that when we are at home, he would go with me over the entire script and we’d practice my scenes. It’s our bonding time. Some people like to play football or cricket outside, we act. And not just lines from my films. Even before I started acting, I used to do scenes from different films of different actors.”

“That’s quite an unusual hobby,” Letterman commented. “Any interesting scene you would like to share?”

“Oh!” Suddenly I remembered one particular incident. “This one time, I was browsing through channels on TV and this film was playing called [Pulp Fiction]. Samuel L. Jackson was doing the scene where he shoots the guy after eating a burger, and I memorized all his lines because that scene is so good. Dad let me practice it, provided I changed some of the words starting with ‘F’ with something else. Mum was not happy when she found out that I watched and learned such a scene.”

Letterman and the audience were howling with laughter after hearing the story.

“Kids,” David Letterman turned to the camera after controlling his laughter. “If you’re seeing this, don’t watch [Pulp Fiction] until you’re older. Don’t follow this young man’s example.” Then he turned to me again, “So, about your film, do you think older people would get bored after seeing it?”

“That depends,” I replied immediately. “Do older people want to relive the innocence of their childhood in a magical fantasy world? If yes, then this film will be the best thing you can experience. I would request everyone to come watch this with their whole family. Everything from the music to the production design to special effects is top-notch. And I’m not saying this because I’m in this film, but because when I watched it for the first time, I wanted to see it again.”

“Well, folks, I couldn’t have said it better myself,” David Letterman said. “[Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone], releasing in cinemas near you this weekend.”

“And cut!” the director of the TV show announced as he cut us off for a break.

“That was a great interview you did back there, son,” David Letterman pointed out.

“Thank you, David,” I smiled at the older man.

“Where are you off to after the interviews?” he asked casually.

“London,” I replied. “We’ll have our premiere the day after, and then the film release next weekend, as you know.”

Although we were shooting this interview before the premiere, it would be telecast on the week of the film release. Letterman hadn’t actually watched the film, so he was lying about that part in the interview.

“It’s a hectic life,” Letterman gave me a sympathetic look. “What about your other film for which you won at Cannes? When is that getting released?”

“It was postponed. The original release date was set for September, but I didn’t have time for promotions. They also thought it would be a lot of good free publicity if we released the film a few months after [Harry Potter]. So they plan to give a limited release in December and a wide release in January.”

“I can’t fault their logic there,” Letterman remarked.

“Troy!” Our chat was interrupted when a set assistant walked over to us. “We have a few fans here who have been waiting for hours for your autograph. Would you be willing to do that, or should I make up some excuse?”

“Hours?” I asked, perplexed. “Don’t these people have a job?”

“Probably not,” Letterman commented idly. “Some people are dedicated fans. They make their living out of selling autographs and signed photos of celebs.”

“I have some time,” I conceded to the assistant. “Lead the way, but make sure only a few people come at a time and that no one surrounds me from all sides.”

“Obviously,” the assistant nodded in confirmation before leading me to my ‘fans’.

I still find the whole concept of hero worship of actors stupid. What’s the relevance of the autograph of a celebrity? None. Zilch. Nada. We are as much humans as everyone else. Photographs I can understand as people can brag about it to their friends and family later on. The problem was this was not the era of smartphones where everyone had a camera in their pocket.

Despite this belief of mine, I didn’t have the heart to decline someone’s request for an autograph. Most people who come to me for this purpose are very nice, and if ten seconds of my time can make someone else’s day, what’s the harm in it, right?

Then again, some people took unfair advantage of some celebrities’ generosity, which forces us celebrities to do exactly what we had hoped to avoid. Like the man in front of me.

“Troy,” the sleazy man smiled benignly. “Can you please sign autographs for my friends and family? I have so many friends who are big fans of your work, but only I could get a seat here today.”

He offered me a stack of my photographs from the set of [The Sixth Sense]. There had to be at least 20 photographs in there. I decided to shut down the request immediately.

“No,” I said firmly before turning to the assistant. “Get the next person in line.”

“Hey!” the man protested. “They really are for my friends and family,” he argued weakly.

“Yeah, and I’m Jesus Christ,” I shot back before he was escorted out of the room. Next, a woman and a young girl came forth with a big poster of me dressed as Harry Potter. I grinned at the girl and opened my arms to offer her a hug, an offer she didn’t refuse, and she latched onto me while screaming in my ear. A little unsettling, I know, but I had gotten used to it by now.

(Break)

“I’m so sorry for that hoarder back there,” the assistant from earlier had followed me back to the green room after I was done signing all the autographs and taking a few photographs with the people who had come to meet me.

“A hoarder?” I asked skeptically.

“Yeah, they pose as fans and get celebs to sign tons of autographs, only to sell them later. Some go even as far as preserving said autographs until the celeb is much bigger in name and fame, so as to fetch a higher price.”

“That’s messed up.” I rubbed my forehead in thought before realizing that the assistant was still standing. “What’s your name?” I asked the young man in his early twenties from my seat. Now that I was sitting again, I felt a little better physically.

“Toby,” he said hesitantly while standing ramrod straight as if I was about to fire him.

“Take a seat, Toby,” I motioned to the only other free seat in the room. When he didn’t do so after a few moments, I said, “I insist.”

When he reluctantly did so, I asked, “Are you new here?”

“Yes,” he nodded slowly.

“Thought so,” I said. “You’re so stiff about things. Shit happens sometimes. Be free and learn to relax. I have dealt with worse fans, and I never blame anyone for things they pull off. And the [Harry Potter] movie is yet to be released. I shudder to think what the fuck would happen afterward.”

Toby was looking at me as if I had grown a second head. “Are you allowed to say words like that?”

I laughed out loud, “Technically no. But I hope you can keep a secret?”

He cracked a smile. “Yeah, sure.”

“You seem like a good enough fella,” I commented. “If this job doesn’t suit you or you need a change of scenery, you can always join me.” Saying that I fished out a card from my pocket which had just my email written on it. I don’t hand out my phone number to anyone for obvious reasons. “Email me anytime.”

Toby looked a little dazed as he took my card. To this day, I don’t know why I offered him that card. I just got a feeling that he was a good bloke and would make an excellent secretary. While my mother was good enough at handling my affairs, I needed an outsider to handle things when I was on set or on a press tour. While Warner was kind enough to send people with me while on the tour, I needed my own staff. Every big actor has a dedicated team of staff attending to their needs, or an entourage if you will.

While I may have handed my card to Toby, it was highly unlikely that he would accept this job given how I spent most of my time in London while he lived in the States, but that thought hit me only after I had already given him the card.

“I’ll keep this offer in mind,” Toby said politely, and I knew he wouldn’t accept it anytime soon. But strangely, I was fine with it.

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