Dungeons Are Bad Business

The next morning, Vee rolled out of bed with a headache that made him feel as if he’d heavily drank the night before. He was slow to get up and dress, and found that even coffee’s magic couldn’t really help him shake away the fatigue.

Alforde was nowhere to be seen, so Vee picked up Reginald, put on his coat, and made his way downstairs.

Sure enough, the armorsoul was in the alley already, swirling Slammy in a complex pattern and lunging around as if in combat. His boots slipped and slid along the snowy ground, but Alforde’s balance never seemed to waver as he darted back and forth, battling foes that only he could see. He practiced with an aggression Vee hadn’t seen before, as if he were trying to destroy the very air around his hammer, and the [Dungeon Master] was unsettled by the cruel light in his friend’s eyes.

“He’s pushing himself really hard,” Reginald said. “Sacha was like that too, when things started getting bad. It was like he thought he’d burn up or something if he wasn’t training, so that’s all he did. Just swung his sword from dawn until dusk, even when we asked him to come hang out with us. The only things he cared about was training and fighting. I think Alforde’s getting worse, boss.”

Vee nodded his agreement, and was extremely grateful that Alforde readily joined them when they said it was time to head to Crestheart. Maybe he wasn’t so far gone as Reginald seemed to think. On the whole, Alforde seemed relatively normal, but Vee’s bond to the armorsoul was surprisingly murky, so he couldn’t really be sure.

Rortenferry and Duvian were waiting for them outside the gate, and after a few minutes of small talk outside the dungeon, the older [Ghost Maestro] rubbed his hands together.

“Alright, this is the moment I’ve been waiting for,” he said excitedly. “Let’s have a look at these fiends, shall we?”

Vee was happy to oblige, as his inner intellectual was eager to learn the truth of the fiends’ development.

Closing his eyes and summoning his orchestra, Vee ordered them to gather outside Crestheart so that Rortenferry could properly examine them all. His minions stood in a single file line that was organized by their sections, and while Vee noticed that most of them were stoic, a few – like Do, Dandelion, and one from the light section – looked to be experiencing some trepidation as the [Professor] walked back and forth and looked them all over.

With a bulging bag of tools slung over his shoulder and a manic glint in his eye, Rortenferry jabbered to Duvian or himself as he gazed into each fiend’s eyes. He checked their limbs and torsos with a small measuring tape, and used a series of skills that caused the spirits to be wreathed in light of varying colors. One by one, he went up and down the line, pausing now and then to check the calibration of his tools or compare his measured values against the reference tables in one of the handful of thick leatherbound books he’d brought with him. He didn’t say what exactly he was looking for, but he looked more excited than Vee ever recalled seeing him back at the academy. There, Rortenferry had been a world-weary old man with a tendency to blather on about some point of theory, and Vee’d had better things to do than pay attention.

The young [Ghost Maestro] found himself wishing he’d paid more attention though, as he didn’t recognize more than half the things Rortenferry did. He’d have to swallow his pride and ask eventually. It seemed like useful stuff to know.

Adventurers showed up while the examination was taking place, but they all kept a safe distance. [Ghost Maestro] work wasn’t quite as dangerous to passerby as that of some classes, but nasty things could and did happen to people who got too close to certain skills. Managing the fallout of such an event was a headache Vee didn’t want to deal with if he didn’t have to, so he was grateful for each person who took an extra wide path around to the Lobby.

Finally, after using a skill that caused the fiends to all lose their color for a few moments, Rortenferry drew back and wiped the thin bead of sweat from his brow.

Vee looked at him hopefully. “Well? Do you know what’s going on?”

Rortenferry shook his head. “I’m afraid not. Truthfully, there’s not much I’m even comfortable speculating about right now. At first glance, they don’t look like anything other than regular fiends. Their bodies are made up of anger, hatred, and all the other nasty emotions people put out into the world, which isn’t surprising given the rest of the city. Oar’s Crest is horrific in that regard. There’s so much pain and suffering around these old buildings, which I’m sure you’ve noticed. However, with all that said, I’ve noticed some evidence that points to the presence of something inside your orchestra that I can’t put my finger on. I think it might be a seed of some sort, but I’ll need more testing to confirm it.”

“You mean you don’t even have any theories?”

Accepting a small silver flask from Duvian, Rortenferry took a sip and cleared his throat. Shaking his head, he took another and wiped his lips dry. At the sight of Vee’s dismayed expression, he grinned and clapped the young man on the shoulder.

“Don’t look so glum, lad. Did you truly expect me to have an answer after a single examination? I’m flattered, but our world is not so easily measured and understood as that! Mysteries like this one take time and experimentation to unravel, and I plan to dedicate plenty of both to this one. Take heart, boy, this is work well worth doing!

“Now, Duvian has reminded me that it’s almost time for your dungeon to open, so if you’d leave me a couple members of your orchestra to look at while you work, I’ll leave you to it. We can go through your lab another time. I suspect that my studies here won’t be finished any time soon, and took the liberty of sending a message to that effect to my comrades back at the Academy. We’ll have plenty of time to go through your glyphs, okay?”

Vee returned the [Professor]’s smile, but he thought about what Reginald’s had said the night before and wondered if the [Professor] would end up following through on his word.

Still, the old man was right about it almost being time to open, so leaving half of the light section, Vee headed to Crestheart.

Thanks to the flyers he’d had Torres make and word of the fight against Mr. Chills, adventurer interest in the dungeon was higher than it’d been in weeks: Forty two people had signed up to make runs.

Bracing himself for a long, draining day, Vee climbed up to the office, set Reginald down on the desk near the magnification crystal, and checked all of his traps. He moved a few platforms back and forth, activated a couple spike launchers, and slammed down three hallway partitions with the push of a button. Everything was in good working order, so he gave his [Majordomo] the signal to get things started and leaned back in his chair as the first adventurer walked in.

The adventurer crept down the hallway, his glowing staff held up like a torch. Its pale yellow light chased away the shadows that would have otherwise lingered on the walls and floor, but the man’s eyes swept back and forth all the same as he continued forward. He’d been taken surprise by a pack of ghosts coming through the wall in an earlier room, and it was obvious that he was taking no further chances.

With his tongue between his teeth, Vee counted the adventurer’s steps as he watched the man get closer to the hidden pitfall in the center of the hall. The [Dungeon Master] lifted his hand to the lever that would open it up and send the adventurer spiraling into the mass of waiting slimes, knowing that pulling it too soon would be just as ineffective as pulling it too late. Proper trap activation was an artform, and while he still had tons to learn, Vee's instincts for it were growing sharper by the day.

Three, two, one, go!

Yanking the lever, Vee watched as the floor split open and the adventurer fell. However, just before the man hit the ground, the [Spellcaster] used [Levitation] – or something similar – and stopped himself from falling into the gooey maws of the ice slimes waiting below. Cursing, Vee watched the man float over to the ladder on the side of the pit and climb back out, but the [Dungeon Master] collected himself and hit his next trap.

Shards of ice shot out of the walls and hit the [Spellcaster] from both sides. Dropping his staff, the man stumbled to the ground and lay there a moment. Vee readied himself to activate another trap on the next tiles, but it didn’t end up being necessary. Raising his arms, the adventurer abandoned his run and was directed to the nearest exit.

Vee smiled. Once again, the inclusion of a second trap immediately after the first had paid dividends. Most adventurers had a weird mental block about the possibility of a second trap so close to the first, and lowered their guard after dodging or overcoming one of the dungeon’s obstacles. He’d gotten a lot of value out of exploiting that tendency.

[Congratulations, you are now a Dungeon Master Level 18!]

[Devious Mind +1]

While Do and the rest of the fiends got to work resetting all the traps and rooms so that they’d be ready for the next run, Vee looked outside at the fading sunlight and stretched his neck and shoulders. Rortenferry was still hard at work, looking at each fiend in turn with a look of intense concentration.

Vee shook his head and rolled his shoulders. Working the console for so many hours in a row was surprisingly tough on his body; he’d have to make a more concentrated effort to get up and move around throughout the day, lest he give himself long term issues.

“How many runs do we have left?” Vee asked.

Reginald consulted the thin stack of applications in front of him and counted them. “Looks like four. You’re wincing, Boss. You going to be okay?”

Vee nodded, stretching his fingers and wrists to relieve the tightness building in his forearms. “I’ll be fine. Let’s hurry up and get the next run going.”

Reginald fluttered his brim and started talking with his [Announcer]’s voice. Vee heard the dungeon groan as the door opened, and the next challenger entered.

It was a younger kid, maybe seventeen or so, and according to her application she was an [Acrobat]. Given that she’d decked herself out in a brown cloak that was too long for her, put on dark lipstick, and was carrying a comically large, curved dagger, Vee suspected that she was aiming to become a [Rogue]. She crouch-ran into the dungeon, slicing through the slimes he sent her way with the opening catapult, and [Flipped] her way past the barrage from the skeleton mages, using her knife to decapitate the lone skeleton knight assigned to the room. With agility doubtlessly born of long and arduous practice, she darted over to the skeleton mage and disarmed it – both literally and figuratively.

“I wish I had another charge of [Boost Drops],” Vee muttered. He’d already tried to use the skill an extra time today, and while the splitting headache he’d gotten for his troubles wasn’t as bad as it could have been, he wasn’t eager to make another attempt just then.

Instead, he contented himself with activating traps as the girl blazed through the dungeon. He leaned forward with anticipation as she entered the arena with Mr. Chills, and smiled as the big ghost filled the air with cold projectiles. He’d had the half of his light section of his orchestra not currently being examined make a blend of snowballs and ice balls to keep the adventurers on their toes since the projectiles moved differently, but the [Acrobat] dodged both with almost contemptuous ease. Even his room traps didn’t slow her down, and she grabbed both pieces of the key before deactivating the mini boss without getting hit.

“I think that was the best mini boss battle we’ve had yet,” Reginald said. “You might want to tell the big guy to get ready. I don’t think she’s going to have any problems with the third floor.”

“Good call,” Vee said. He reached over and activated the magnifying crystal that put him in touch with Alforde. “You’ve got a fast one headed your way, buddy!”

A surge of savage joy flooded through their bond, so strong that Vee recoiled from it.

“Finally! I was starting to worry that I wouldn’t get to battle anyone today!”

Vee pursed his lips and shifted in his seat, uncomfortable by the snappy edge in the armorsoul’s tone.

“You fought two adventurers this morning,” he said.

“Yeah, well, they didn’t count,” the armorsoul replied. “They barely even fought back!”

“Ah…” Vee said quietly as he deactivated the magnifying crystal. He looked over at Reginald and saw that his [Majordomo] was frowning.

“Tick, tock, Boss,” the hat said.

Vee nodded and drummed his fingers on the desk.

Tick tock indeed.

Main Character Sheets:

Vee Vales

Primary Class: Ghost Maestro (Locksmagister University), Level 28

Secondary Class: Dungeon Master (Oar’s Crest), Level 18 (+1)

Tertiary Class: Guy-Who-Takes-Things-WAY-Too-Far (Self), Level 5

Might: 12

Wit: 31

Faith: 21

Adventurousness: 7

Ambition: 14

Plotting: 18

Charisma: 12

Devious Mind: 22 (+1)

Leadership: 16

Guts: 13

Intimidating Presence: 9

Citizenship: 20

Public Relations: 6

Alforde Armorsoul:

Primary Class: Hammer Afficionado (Self), Level 21

Secondary Class: Right-hand man (Vee Vales), Level 12

Tertiary Class: Dungeon Champion (Oar’s Crest), Level 14

Additional Class: Glaciernaut (Sacha Silverblade), Level 3

Might: 39

Wit: 12

Faith: 26

Adventurousness (Bound – Vee Vales): 8

Endurance: 19

Intimidating Presence: 13

Heart of a Champion: 8

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 8

Vigilance: 6

Vanity: 4

Reginald:

Primary Class: Core Spirit (Unknown), Level ???

--~%@(%$@ &% (*$ #&#e !i$$ (#$%#$%#$@!)~--, #$v@& ????

Secondary Class: Loudmouth (Self), Level 39

Tertiary Class: Majordomo (Vee Vales), Level 15

Additional Class: Announcer (Vee Vales), Level 8

Might: 1

Wit: 32

Faith: 11

Ambition: 27

Greed: 22

Deceptiveness: 28

Manipulativeness: 36

$#&*!@!!

Loyalty: 46

Patience: 9 (-1)

[#&%%%@%!#@__--#%]

%^(@#!! @#$@!@#

Citizenship (Bound – Vee Vales): 7