#046 – I’m a bit of a completionist
The map didn’t really make much sense.
Its only features were vague shapes with a bunch of seemingly random arrows and I didn’t even know where to start.
KaiEbikoOfficial: I’ve been replaced
GonguuH: I would start with the third slide
Irid123: maybe you gotta go back to floor two?
“I would never replace you, Ebi! This map is terrible anyway! How are you even supposed to read it?” I scoffed at the map before putting it back into my backpack. “Well, I wanted to see what was behind slide number three anyway. I mean, I thought I would have to go through all three before I got to the boss, so yeah.”
I passed through the golden gate once more and found myself under the warm fake sun. I shielded my eyes and looked around for any stray zombies, but found none. I briefly wondered whether I could get tan under this fake sun and whether it could cause skin cancer as well. Could it power solar panels? How come the temperatures weren’t absolutely scorching if it was never overcast and the sun never set?
I shook my head.
Why was I even trying to find logic inside this dungeon? I should know better by now.
“Well, slide time! I hope it has cool loot,” I said brightly before navigating through the warping space to the slides again. There were only a handful of zombies that tried to accost me on my way there and I dealt with them without an issue.
It kind of struck me when I cleanly decapitated one of them.
I’d really gotten used to fighting, hadn’t I? I remembered the first time the basic zombies had jumped me back on floor one and my panic and fumbling around. But now? No problem.
Being in this world was slowly changing me. Not just the physical changes or even the system messing with my head, but I was changing as a person as well.
Just when had I become a freaking fighter? Where had the innocent Vcuber averse to exercise gone?
I huffed and shook my head.
I didn’t really have a choice, did I? I needed to be a fighter to survive in this world. I still knew barely anything about it, despite already being here for a week, but if all this world had to offer were empty forests and dungeons, I had to be able to fight.
No time to mourn who I used to be. Not like there was much to mourn anyway. I was… happy with who I was now, despite everything.
But I couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to my old body back on Earth. Was it still there, lying lifeless in the bed? Or had the entire apartment complex burned down with me in it?
I could ask people to check… But it still felt wrong to dox myself like that.
Why the hell was I so apprehensive about it? I was literally in another world. Maybe I should just–
A splash behind me made me whirl around and toss my key sword like a boomerang. The blade pierced the emerging zombie through the skull and the zombie slid back down into the pool while I re-summoned the blade.
I stared for a moment before heaving a sigh.
Later.
I wanted to finish this dungeon first and then I would worry about everything else. Not like it really mattered that much what had happened to my old body anyway.
Unless there was no old body and this was all a simulation or a dream or…
Okay, no. Not going there again.
Shaking those thoughts aside, I finally made it to the slides again and shoved these thoughts aside. When I came to the seemingly mild slide, I squatted down and narrowed my eyes in suspicion.
“Now look, chat. The last slide betrayed me, so I’m not about to trust this one. For all I know, it could suddenly change into something even steeper than that one–” I pointed at the first slide I’d used. “–and then drop me into a pool of sharks.”
JamieWasTaken3: that would be very on brand for this dungeon lol
KaiEbikoOfficial: I really hope not…
GonguuH: maybe let a coin or something roll down the slide first?
I hummed and reached into my backpack and into the wallet to pull out one of the copper coins.
“Good idea, Gong. Let’s see what happens…”
I set the coin on top of the slide and let it get washed down by the trickle of water coming from the top of the slide. I kept my eyes on it the whole time as it slid down at a leisurely pace, flew into the air, and then splashed into the pool of death water below.
I stared.
“...Is this slide literally a trap? What the heck?”
KaiEbikoOfficial: good thing you didn’t use it then
GonguuH: hmm I guess the space warping only works on you?
Jeofffff: its a trap!
GonguuH: maybe try the steep slide too?
Irid123: you gotta burn the water first like with the other slide, right?
I frowned at the comments.
“True. I had to fireball the other pool, I guess this is the same…? At least, I hope it is,” I mumbled, before an idea struck me. “Hey, you know what, chat? I never tried to use my bucket or my towel on that death water. You think it will work?”
Jeofffff: I doubt it
Jeofffff: it’s a dungeon object
KaiEbikoOfficial: that’s a good idea
JamieWasTaken3: omg how about you load that water into your gun
Jeofffff: meh they ar eimmune anyway
“Oh right! The gun!” My eyes went wide. “But yeah, the zombies are kind of immune to that. But maybe it will be useful elsewhere?”
Well, the gun’s barrel seemed to have a massive capacity, so there was no harm in loading it up with some of that death water.
Jeofffff: it’s probably not gonna let you carry it out of the dungeon
I frowned.
“Why wouldn’t it…?”
Jeofffff: didn’t let you steal chairs either
“...What are you talking about? I never tried stealing chairs.”
Jeofffff: wait really?
Jeofffff: I could have sworn
I eyed Jeoff in chat suspiciously.
Jeofffff: nvm then try it
KaiEbikoOfficial: having indestructible chairs would be nice for your house quest
I shrugged.
“You’re right… Ugh, I wanted to do the final boss and here I am getting distracted by all the side quests… Well, whatever. It can wait.” I pulled out the map and scowled at it again. “Not like I even know where to find him yet. This thing’s not very useful.” I put the map back in. “Anyway! We’re getting too off track. Let’s see where this slide leads. Hopefully not instant death.”
So far, this dungeon hadn’t had any blatant unfair death traps that I couldn’t get out of. Maybe it was a bit foolish of me to think that it wouldn’t switch things up, but… my gut told me that this dungeon was meant to be cleared. It wouldn’t just randomly kill its explorers without giving them a chance.
And well, worst case scenario, if the slide was a trap, I could launch myself out of the death pool with my bubble glove like I’d done against the octopus boss.
It was going to be fine.
“Here goes nothing!”
I pulled out the towel and held it in my right hand preemptively to prevent repeating another drowning episode, made sure I had enough Ether for a big Fire Breath just in case I needed to burn the pool’s surface again, and nodded to myself before settling down on the slide.
Then I pushed myself down the slide.
It started off very mild and slow, but I was already gritting my teeth in preparation for it to get crazy like the spiral one.
But to my surprise, it never did. I slid down at a leisurely pace and got tossed right into the pool of death water. Seeing as the space had yet to get all wonky, I decided to act before I landed in it.
I breathed in and prepared to burn through the death water like I’d done with the first slide, but before I could, the space finally began warping, this time around the pool itself. The pool’s surface bent inwards like a sinkhole and created a tunnel right in the middle of the pool where I was falling.
Then I was suddenly sucked in. It felt like someone had grabbed me out of the air and roughly pulled me down.
My eyes went wide and I gasped with a startled squeak at the movement, making me abort my Fire Breath.
I tumbled through the tunnel in the lake at worrying speeds for a few seconds, before my momentum abruptly slowed down again and I found myself in the familiar underground tunnels with water right below me.
I splashed into it and spent a few moments trying to find the surface again, but luckily, I didn’t breathe in any water this time thanks to the towel I already had on hand.
When I emerged on the surface again, I took a deep breath and sighed as I put the towel away again.
“...Right. So, that just happened.”
JamieWasTaken3: you got yoinked lol
KaiEbikoOfficial: well that was better than the others at least
Irid123: huh
Irid123: it warped space to speed you up
I shrugged. At this point, I didn’t really have any words for this nonsense. Just another day of dungeon exploration.
“Well, let’s see what’s in these tunnels then,” I murmured.
Just like the first tunnel, this one didn’t branch at all and my only choice was to go either forward or backward. Since both directions looked identical, not to mention, the dungeon was probably going to do its warping shenanigans as well, I swam in a random direction without thinking about it too much.
On my way through, I got accosted by more of those flying plush fish, but at this point, I could easily dispatch them without much of an issue. I didn’t even need Fire Breath for it.
It didn’t take long for me to reach the end of the tunnel. Just like the first slide’s tunnels, it ended with an elevated platform and a chest on top of it.
“Loot!” I cheered. “So this was a side path all along! And the spiral chute was the main path!”
Then, of course, I pulled out my naginata, carefully approached the chest in a crouch with a frown and began poking it.
GonguuH: makes sense
GonguuH: the main path was the middle one
Irid123: I guess that means the dungeon isn’t reacting to you
I hummed. “What do you mean, Irid?”
Irid123: like
Irid123: the dungeon was designed and now you are going through it
Irid123: but it’s not adapting to what you are doing
Irid123: otherwise it would lead you here before the boss
I tilted my head as I stashed my naginata.
“Well, I dunno. It could still be the case. And maybe this is just some bonus loot?” I shrugged. “Whatever. Doesn’t really matter, to be honest. It’s loot time!”
I popped the chest open – it was so easy now compared to a week ago when I’d struggled to open one – and glanced at the contents. My eyes stopped at the pink bikini with white flower patterns on it.
“...Swimsuit? Really, dungeon?”
I fired Appraisal at it anyway.
Ancient Lily bikini
A two piece swimsuit with patterns resembling the legendary Lilies. When worn over the bare body, the user gains a moderate water pressure and cold resistance. Automatically adjusts its size to the wearer by using the wearer’s Ether. Channeling Ether through it allows the user to control the immediate water around them to swim better. Also smells like the ancient Lilies.
Swim better.
I groaned and looked at the other object in the chest – a set of diver’s goggles – before appraising them as well.
Deep sea explorer’s goggles
Goggles for deep water diving. When worn over the eyes, water will affect the user in the same way air does. Also allows better vision underwater.
I huffed to myself.
“Of course I get all the swimming equipment now after I’m done with floor three! God dammit, dungeon!”
Jeofffff: good for future runs
JamieWasTaken3: lmao why does it smel of lilies
Irid123: what does that even mean?
Irid123: the goggles
“What future runs? You think the dungeon will reset once I clear it?” I murmured as I leaned into the chest, grabbed the bikini – god, this felt weird – and sniffed it.
It really did smell like Lilies.
Why?
JamieWasTaken3: nana the swimsuit sniffer
I felt my face heat up as I shoved the bikini into my backpack.
“...Ahem. It really does smell like Lilies. That’s just weird, chat,” I murmured, ignoring my embarrassment.
Good thing they couldn’t see my face.
Then I grabbed the goggles and put them over my head, but left them on my forehead for the time being.
Jeofffff: not gonna use the swimsuit?
“No, I… Look, the resistances are nice, but my current clothes are better, right? I remember them having some general damage resistance,” I reasoned.
Of course, I was also a bit conflicted on actually wearing a women’s swimsuit. Especially since I would have to change while chat was watching…
Jeofffff: I mean fusion
I opened my mouth to argue and then closed it again.
“...Right. Forgot about that. Eh, but I just swapped Craftsman out so I can’t fuse right now,” I said, feeling kind of relieved.
Jeofffff: oh yeah damn
KaiEbikoOfficial: wait, are you going to fight the final boss without it?
“Well…” I frowned. “...You’re right, Ebi. I didn’t think this through, did I? Ugh…”
Dammit. I wanted to finish this damn dungeon today… but it was probably a better idea to wait for the cooldown to swap Craftsman back in, huh? Ugh, but if I did that the next day, then Appraisal would be on cooldown and then I wouldn’t be able to Appraise whatever the boss dropped.
This skill slot system was so annoying. How were you supposed to get more skill slots besides the limit break?
“...Okay, new plan, chat. I’m gonna spend some time practicing using the lightning without Craftsman and if I can do it consistently, I’m gonna do the boss today. If not, I’ll swap Craftsman back tomorrow and find the boss then.”
Jeofffff: aw man
KaiEbikoOfficial: sounds like a plan
JamieWasTaken3: load up on some death water
“Mm, yeah I’ll do that. Thanks for the idea, Jamie.” I turned around and blinked in momentary surprise. The flooded tunnel was gone and was replaced by one leading to outside. Just like the first slide’s tunnels. “Well, I guess I won’t get to test the goggles much. Whatever. Let’s go.”
I pulled the goggles over my eyes and walked out of the tunnel. Just as advertised, the water at my feet barely slowed me down.
If the final boss room had any water, this was going to be very useful.