Futile Love

Chapter 127: Chapter 127
The little girl, who appeared to be a court lady in his eyes, knew every nook and corner of the palace as if she lived there for a long time. Following her, he went to secret places where he couldn’t dare to go alone and saw beautiful scenery that he could not imagine. When they parted, the girl had tears in her eyes and wouldn’t let go of the hem of his robe. But when they met the next day, she wrapped her arms around him with a smile on her face.

“I’ll see you again tomorrow!”

The girl promised to meet him without listening to him. Although he could easily break the promise she made on her own, he went to see her without fail. As a result, he stayed much longer than he planned to originally, and it was already at the end of spring before he knew.

After he met her in the back garden, he wasn’t interested in what went on at the cabinet meetings in Daejon in the Hwa Kingdom. He found himself spending days thinking about the girl and recalling her face unconsciously.

“Isn’t it time to say it now?”

One day when he was watching her babbling pleasantly after picking up a bunch of thin silk from somewhere, he asked her.

Running around as if she was about to dance with the silk wrapped around her, she trotted toward him. The girl grinned at him after she gently sat in front of him as he squatted on the field.

“What do you want to know about me?”

“Your name. I think we can introduce to each other, as we have been playing together a lot.”

Pouting her lips, she said, “Well, if you know my name, you will run away. I hate it. I won’t tell you because you will leave me, because you won’t play with me…”

She suddenly looked aghast while grumbling then began to cry. Although he was hardly ever moved by into revealing his true feelings, he was really at a loss about what to do this time. Tears dropped on the silk wrapped around her body, showing no sign of stopping. Although she was wiping her tears quickly, it was useless as she shed more tears than she wiped. With the girl crying before his eyes, he agonized, not knowing what to do.

He was not sure whether he should stroke her head or pet her on the shoulder to dissuade her from crying, or hug and comfort her. He never thought he wanted to stop someone’s crying. So he didn’t know what to do.

“I won’t run away. I will not leave.”

In the end, that’s all he could say to her. Although he wanted to hug that little girl crying, he couldn’t, and shouldn’t because she was a court lady of the Hwa Kingdom.

That was too bad.

A court lady was the king’s woman. No matter how young she was, she was the king’s woman, so he couldn’t hold her in his arms.

For the first time since he was born, he felt a sense of despair that he couldn’t have his way, and a bitter sense of defeat.

‘How come this girl is a court lady here?’

“As I want to be closer to you, I want to know your name. I can’t call you just ‘you’ forever.”

With his hand pausing in the air momentarily, he barely touched her head. Her hair was soft. When he stroked her thin hair, she held his hands as she cried.

“I’m simple-minded, so let me trust you.”

She nodded and then said just one word after hesitating a bit.

“Chanbi.”

“What did you say?”

“Chanbi. My name is Chanbi.”

She saw the girl’s closed lips trembling.

“Hummm…..Chanbi. So, you are called Chanbi or cold rain, because ‘chan’ refers to cold, while ‘bi’ refers to rain?”

The girl shook her head at his interpretation.

“Then, just Chanbi? Is Chanbi your name? ”

The girl shook her head at that, too. After sighing, she barely opened her mouth when somebody interrupted.

“What are you doing here?”

He heard a man’s voice, but he didn’t care about it and still looked at the girl, but the girl was surprised and backed away from Bipaan. At a loss about what to do, she buried her face in the hem of her silk skirt.

Bipaan was slightly irritated by the voice that interrupted it because he felt he could find out her name. Looking at the place where the voice was heard with a stern look, he found a boy dressed in silk clothes, looking too young for an adult.

Was he about the same age, 15 or 16?

Despite his young age, he had an aura of dignity, as if he were from a noble family.

Of course, he was not comparable to Bipaan, the Crown Prince of the Mok Kingdom.

Nonetheless, the boy approached proudly and stopped in front of the girl.

“What were you doing here? How come you were so rude without knowing who he was?”

“Oh, Prince Mingung!…”

Her voice trembled, as she was scared. Bipaan looked at the boy called Prince Mingung. The boy who suddenly appeared was Mingung, the prince of the Hwa Kingdom. Knowing the opponent’s identity, Bipaan was more annoyed about him.

‘How come the prince of a small kingdom disturbed him?’ he thought to himself.

“She just mentioned Mingung. If that’s the case, are you a prince of this kingdom?”

His slow voice was very cold, compared to his soft voice when playing with her.

Not only Mingung was surprised by his cold voice but also the girl, who turned and looked at Bipaan with teary eyes.

At that moment Mingung replied, “I’ve introduced myself to you recently. Don’t you remember me?”

The girl’s round eyes turned to Mingung this time. If he was a prince, he was the third highest person in the Hwa Kingdom. How come he was using honorific words towards him?

As she did not know Bipaan’s identity, she couldn’t understand the situation. Without knowing her curiosity, Mingung bowed to him and pulled away her hands.

“Please forgive this child’s rudeness. I just hope her rudeness won’t cause any crack in the friendly relationship between the two kingdoms.”

“Well, that depends on you.”

Bipaan’s gaze turned to the girl. Noticing that, Mingung hid the girl behind her, biting his lip. When the girl behind Mingung stuck her head out and looked at Bipaan, he pushed her back and said, “Go back to your place.”

“However… . ”

“Go on!”

As Mingung raised his voice, she flinched and left the back garden, with her head down.

Leaving, she seemed to cry again. Bipaan was touched. With tears dropping, she disappeared. After she left, Mingung said a few more words, but Bipaan didn’t care.

From that day she did not appear in the back garden. Bipaan went to the place a couple of times, where he went with the girl, but he couldn’t meet her. The girl disappeared after she opened his tightly closed heart at once and won his heart.

There was no reason for him to stay in the Hwa Kingdom anymore, so Bipaan left the country, with his lingering affection for her.

***

Many years passed. Young Bipaan now grew up to the age of twenty-three while completely concealing his emotions. He confessed to his favorite brother Ruhae a few times about his affection for the girl he met in the Hwa Kingdom but kept his longing for her to his heart. As she was a court lady of a foreign kingdom, he was not supposed to keep in touch with her. All he had to do was just to hide his love of her from anybody else.

One day the emperor gave Bipaan another order. Ironically, it was an order for him to greet the princess of the Hwa Kingdom, who was the only girl in his heart. In fact, he had a woman he had already married.

Bipaan accepted several women at the emperor’s order. All he did was just accept them at his order, nothing more or less. He had no intention to live with them from the beginning. In fact, he had given away all his heart to that girl who he saw in a foreign kingdom a long time ago.

It was one day after some time had passed since both kingdoms discussed about their marriage. Bipaan, as always, was reading a book at his residence. Then a eunuch came in to announce, “I am honored to inform you that the first princess of the Hwa Kingdom has arrived.”

When he heard the ‘Hwa Kingdom,’ he was heartbroken but didn’t reveal his feelings.

The eunuch continued, “I hear that Prince Ruhae, who was walking in the back garden at the moment, greeted her.”

“Ruhae?” said he, wiggling his eyebrows.

“I am relieved if he welcomed her.”

He was briefly disturbed by that, but he opened the book again. The woman who would be his official wife and the Crown Princess several days later was not the subject of his valid interest.

He was not interested in a ‘woman’ at all. His first and foremost interest was only in being the emperor. He was born to be an emperor, he took it as his rightful duty, and he could do anything to become the emperor. He was born and raised solely for the position of the emperor. He had never thought about nurturing warm and tender feelings, except for one occasion.