Harry Potter: Magic and Guns

Support me and be 20 chapters ahead of webnovel:

patreon.com/Draco_
*****

“H-Harry, you feel like having roast chicken, right?”

“Huh? What?”

“Hagrid, you can’t eat him!”

The twins, who had been pretending to faint just moments ago, jumped up at once when they heard Hagrid's words. Their faces were full of alarm as they stared at him, a hint of worry in their eyes.

“Well, hurry up and get up then!”

Hagrid snorted, clearly unimpressed by their act. “You know you’ve caused a lot of trouble this time.”

“Are you out of your minds?! Why would you go so deep into the forest? I’ve warned you countless times! If you were just hanging around the edges before, I let it slide, but do you have any idea how dangerous the Forbidden Forest is?”

“Five-legged beasts, venomous leopards, Ridgeback dragons, sphinxes, manticores, terrorbirds, blackrock serpents... I can’t even count how many creatures in this forest could kill you in an instant!”

“Don’t just ignore what Headmaster Dumbledore and the professors tell you! You little brats!”

Hagrid’s furious shout echoed in the twins’ ears, draining the last bit of energy they had left.

“This is a place where people die! If you hadn’t run into me today, you’d be dead in a Troll’s stomach right now!”

“We're s-sorry, Hagrid, we weren’t thinking this time…”

The twins, looking utterly deflated, didn’t dare to argue. They hung their heads and nodded. They had known they’d made a terrible mistake the moment they encountered the Trolls, but by then, there was nothing they could do.

“From now on, neither of you is allowed to set foot in the Forbidden Forest. I don’t want a day to come when Molly and Arthur arrive at Hogwarts only to take home whatever’s left of you—be it a finger or some undigested bones.”

“We understand.”

Whether the twins were really listening or not was unclear, but at least for now, they obediently agreed.

“That’s better.” Hagrid nodded begrudgingly. “You two risked your lives just for this?”

He pointed at the Puffball Bird they were holding. The twins nodded.

“If you wanted to keep one, why didn’t you just ask me? I could’ve brought back a dozen of them. These little birds may run fast, but a single shout can knock them out cold. They’re tasty too, though there’s not much meat on them—good for making soup.”

Before the twins could respond, the Puffball Bird in their arms puffed up in fright, turning into an even larger ball of fluff. Its little tail trembled, and it buried its head deep into its body, completely disappearing. Hagrid's talk of eating it had clearly terrified the poor creature.

“Hey! Hagrid, he’s our friend! You can’t eat him!”

“Yeah, right, Blu? We’re friends, and we won’t let Hagrid eat you.”

The twins stroked the trembling fluffball gently. Comforted by their touch, the Puffball Bird poked its head out, gazing at them with grateful little eyes.

“All right, all right. Seeing as you both barely made it out alive today, I won’t press the matter further.”

Hearing this, the twins’ eyes lit up, but their relief was short-lived as Hagrid quickly extinguished their hopes.

“But you still have to face the consequences. You’re coming with me to see Professor McGonagall. Sneaking into the Forbidden Forest on the first day of term? I’m sure she’ll have a fair punishment for you both.”

“Nooo!”

“Please, Hagrid!”

“We’re begging you!”

The twins’ faces dropped as they could already foresee the long, dreary days ahead filled with detentions and scrubbing toilets. The toilets in the school hospital had practically become their lifelong nemesis; after two years of ‘intimacy,’ they could even recognize each one’s distinct features and had taken the liberty of giving them names.

“No room for negotiation. It’s settled,” Hagrid said firmly, shaking his head. He needed to ensure they learned their lesson today.

“Rest here for a few minutes while I tidy things up. Stay put and don’t even think about running off!”

“H-Harry, keep an eye on them. If they try to run, just punch them. If you knock them out, it’s on me.”

“Right…” Harry rolled his eyes. What was even going on here?

As Hagrid walked off to deal with the Trolls he had killed—or nearly killed—the twins exchanged knowing glances. With friendly smiles, they turned their attention to Harry. The twins were naturals at making friends and could easily strike up a rapport with anyone they wanted to know.

They were, in fact, quite knowledgeable about a bit of everything, though their intelligence rarely reflected in their exam scores. Still, there was no denying their cleverness and resourcefulness.

Within just a few lines of banter, they had already drawn Harry into a lively conversation. The twins, acting as unofficial Hogwarts know-it-alls, spoke freely about all sorts of interesting tidbits. They quickly deduced one thing upon meeting Harry: he would be an excellent friend to have—not because of his already well-toned physique, which was hard to miss—but because Hagrid had taken him into the Forbidden Forest.

The twins had long since accepted they would never win over Hagrid’s favor, but Harry? Now, he could become Hagrid’s favorite. And with that connection, what couldn’t they get their hands on from the Forbidden Forest in the future?

As Harry enjoyed their lively chat, he seized the chance to ask about something he had been meaning to inquire about. To his surprise, the twins provided him with unexpected news.

“Quirrell, you say? Wasn’t he the Muggle Studies professor, George?”

“Yeah, that’s right. Graduated from Ravenclaw, I think. Stayed on to teach, like Charlie and the other brainy ones.”

George rubbed his chin, trying to recall more details. “But I heard he’s dead. He wasn’t around at the start of term, and over the summer, Dad mentioned something about a Hogwarts professor dying in Albania.”

“Oh, right! He was completely drained of blood—looked like a mummified corpse. It caused quite a stir at the Ministry, since it’s been a long time since there was such a grisly murder.”

“Some think a vampire did it, while others suspect it was dark magic. Dad believes it was a dark ritual, maybe some cult coming back to life.”

“But Harry, how do you know Quirrell?”

The twins looked curiously at Harry, but before he could answer, the heavy sound of Hagrid’s footsteps cut the conversation short.

Hagrid had dragged over the giant tree that had been smashed by the Trolls. He had been planning to chop wood anyway, so since the tree was already down, he figured he might as well put it to good use. One of the Trolls, though headless, was still alive—its chest had a gaping hole the size of a washbasin.

The Trolls, now tied up with thick, sturdy vines, were secured to the tree, which Hagrid casually slung over his shoulder. The massive load—easily twenty or thirty tons—was effortlessly hauled by Hagrid, who moved like a human tow truck. He could probably travel hundreds of kilometers on just one meal, making for an eco-friendly transport option.

“Alright, let’s go. We’re leaving the forest now. Keep up!”

The twins scrambled to their feet, and Harry, deep in thought, followed closely behind, reflecting on the startling news they had just shared.

“Quirrell died in Albania, huh?”

“So Voldemort... Hah, something’s definitely off with the script in this world.”

“What kind of ‘fish’ will Dumbledore catch with that Philosopher’s Stone bait?”

Lost in his thoughts, Harry silently trailed after Hagrid, step by step, as they left the eerie green depths of the Forbidden Forest.

(End of Chapter)