chapter 35
35 – A grand plan covered in a shell of good intentions
“Come on, eat.”
In the bedroom on the second floor, I ate at a small table by the window.
I slowly put the food in my mouth, savoring the smell of charcoal and freshly baked bread from the thinly sliced salted ham, and the moisture and freshness of the fresh vegetables.
I was chewing it over and over, enjoying the crumbly mass in my mouth and slowly disappearing over my throat, but for some reason, a feeling of uneasiness began to grow in my heart little by little.
‘I don’t think he added hair again.’
With that thought in mind, I lifted the ingredients little by little with my hands, or lifted and placed the bread with trembling hands… I licked the ham with my tongue –
“Puhehehe, what are you doing now?”
It just caught on to her.
“No, no, that’s…”
When I reflexively covered my forehead, wondering if she might hit my head on the floor again, she gently sat down next to me and handed my hair over.
“Why? Is there something in the food?”
“…”
Is that too outspoken?
Intimidated, I looked at her and she held the bread and held it to my mouth.
“I want you to be happy when you eat my food. It’s not that you get scared when you see my food. Huh? You have to eat my food to cheer up, eat my food and feel refreshed… Aha, this is too much for me to say. I might not have been too concerned.”
With a flick, the bread landed from her hand and returned to the bowl.
“…”
Silently, she took her hair tie out of her pocket, tied her hair together, looked again at the bowl, and held up the bread to me again.
“No hair. I swear. And I promise. I won’t play with food again.”
Seeing her sitting with her legs together, smiling at me and urging me to eat the bread, I… Huh, I ended up taking a bite of the bread.
Yes, the taste was there.
The pancake she gave me that day was also a dinner I would have chewed without hesitation if it hadn’t been for her hair.
“I’m going to take Mr. Felter to the hospital today. To check his health.”
“…wasn’t he wary of her?”
To be honest, I never thought that words like that would come out of her mouth.
It was yesterday that he expressed with all his heart that he did not want her from me.
One time, I left her alone in the living room and intermingled with her, saying that she would leave a mark on my body.
And the thing that attacked me in the bedroom while saying that I would definitely mark it…
ok
But to say that you will take care of her yourself like this?
If something is wrong, it must be definitely wrong –
“No matter how wary I may be of her, the reality is that without your affection, nothing is possible.”
A rattle, the bowl made a sound.
“Even if I show you how great my affection is, if I don’t get even a little love from you, all my actions will be useless. I know that.
No matter how much love is poured from either side in both directions, if it becomes unrequited love, it is useless for any pair. In the end, that kind of thing is just a mass of nuisance, and those who have unrequited love are greatly hurt by that reality.
Even if you want to convey your heart to someone you love, how cruel it is to feel sad and sad as much as having that behavior and heart itself becomes a nuisance…”
Without blinking, she looked straight into my eyes and continued talking. She put the last bite in her mouth and chewed it.
“hahahaha, I ate well.”
She licked off all the remaining bread crumbs in her hand, brushed them off in her mouth, swallowed them, and sat down facing me.
“So, now I’m trying to get affection from you. It’ll take some effort on my part to do that, right?”
“Sureuk,” he said, holding his hand.
Holding my hand with a little force, she started talking to me in a whisper.
“The child’s hometown is the back alley of the city. It’s not such a good environment to be born and grow up. Due to the nature of a dirty place, he’ll get sick, and there are many things that need to be taken care of. Medicine for treatment and regular visits to the hospital… Overcoming the disease They need warm attention and affection.”
Her whispers seemed to urge me to act. It’s like allowing a little bit of freedom.
But it… I wasn’t the one who would be completely fooled by it.
She intends to test me.
As if she was digging the grave I had dug, she was quietly handing me a shovel.
By way of analogy… She would know all too well that if I were to resist her, I might try to hit her with a shovel in my bare hands.
But they give me a shovel.
Because I know very well that I can’t resist, no, I can’t resist.
“I will take care of the child. All you have to do is to check the child’s condition as the owner and continue to watch and support him so that he can safely return to health in your arms.”
“Sureuk,” her arms wrapped around her, her breasts covering my nose.
As the hazy body odor climbs up my nose, she blows hot breath into my ears and flicks her tongue. Slowly, very slowly, it drenches and swallows my ears.
“And when she is finally healthy and happy, pray for her bright future and set her free from your arms. Just like a cute little girl…”
At her last words, I felt a sudden jump in my mind.
And I felt something indescribable in her eyes.
I hoped that what I was thinking was wrong.
I hoped she wasn’t thinking of Mr. Felter as a rehearsal for the daughter we were raising.
I tried to use Mr. Felter as an opportunity for me to get some distance from her.
But she turned the game upside down all too easily.
Compared to her, she is so dwarfed and looks young.
Compared to the 25-year-old girl full of maturity, she doesn’t even feel like a woman, just a cute and pitiful kitten.
Was it because she knew what to think of Mr. Felter, or did she just wake up something latent in her mind because she looked young?
Either way it wasn’t good.
I was already her husband and her partner.
To the extent that the very act of trying to distance herself from her even a little was colorless, she had already determined and acted on something.
Her relationship with me had become something she couldn’t even concede to, and she was about to clear the roadblocks.
In a way that even I dare not say anything carelessly, with a terrible kindness.
“For her, we are the perfect family. Not a dirty family that kicked her out and sold her for mere riches, but a loving and affectionate family that makes her a great adult. And when the time comes, We’ll let her go.”
Her lips lightly touched my forehead, and she got up to look in the mirror and straighten her dress.
“So let’s try to be good guardians, us.”
The road to her lair was well-intentionedly paved.
***
family.
To be honest, it’s a dumb idea even I came up with.
When I first came up with this idea, I seriously wondered if I was crazy.
However, as soon as I realized that it was the best way and the best way, I couldn’t help but tremble with joy.
Maybe, of course, I won’t be far off from my predictions – but the best gift you can give to a child who grew up in a bad family is affection.
But what if that affection is not affection as a member of the opposite s*x, but as a family affection?
If you treat her with kindness wrapped in good intentions, just as you would treat a daughter or a younger brother… she will automatically rely on me and follow me.
She too will remain thinking of him as a brother or a relative.
How can you come up with such a good idea!
When I think of them as a family rather than a competitor, I feel like I can see a more comfortable path.
It feels like the chimney-like worries and hatred disappear like snow melting.
Wouldn’t she believe in me and follow me if I received my kindness and attention before the goodwill she would give me?
If I use a little fear and authority to subdue her, get her accustomed to me with kindness and love –
It’s like naturally moving away from him, and at the same time having a child who is like a family member who listens to my ‘request’.
It’s like raising a daughter…
Ah, thinking like that makes my heart tremble even more.
The child between him and me, how cute.
You can think of it as a rehearsal. Of course, cuter and cuter children than that female cat will be born between him…
Happiness comes to me only when a crisis is turned into an opportunity.