Hogwarts Reimagined

Content warning - Panic, intrusion of personal space, brief discussion of past transphobia. Then grief and meltdown.

After the discussion they had had with Hagrid about Riddle’s diary and his true identity, Rhiannon was set on giving the diary to Professor McGonagall. However, she hadn’t considered just how difficult that might be. They were confined to common areas, the library, the great hall or classrooms at all times, and it was incredibly difficult to get a moment to speak to a teacher when the teachers themselves were so stretched in trying to keep an eye on all the students at once. So the diary lay in Rhiannon’s clothes-chest unattended, as she tried to get a free moment to bring it to the professor.

Had it been Hermione alone, perhaps the school would not have closed down so much. But a second girl had been Petrified in the same attack, a fifth-year Ravenclaw Prefect named Penelope Clearwater, though Rhiannon had been too distressed to take note at the time. As Fudge had mentioned, she was a pureblood – and that gave the school and ministry alike no choice but to take the attacks far more seriously than they had. Ministry workers trawled the castle and its’ plans for the Chamber of Secrets, and the students’ movements were restricted for their safety.

Rhiannon’s plans to take the matter to McGonagall were further interrupted by the March full moon cycle that began only a few days after learning of the diary’s allegiance. Neither she nor Dudley were particularly enthusiastic about it, and the strange sounds that rose from the forest kept them away. They were too quiet and miserable in themselves to even want to run over the hillsides. So despite Hagrid’s urging, they both stayed put behind the cabin, sniffing around the magical creatures and the garden. Dudley was scolded for chewing the garden fence, while Rhiannon was so quiet and withdrawn that eventually Hagrid gave up and let her inside the cabin to sleep on the floor with Fang while Dudley nosed around outside. After a while even Dudley lost interest in exploring alone, and he sat at the door and whined until Hagrid let him inside too.

What was a surprise was what they found when they got in on the second night of the full moon. Rhiannon was just heading up to bed when she collided with a very startled Ron Weasley halfway up the girls’ staircase, holding a lit lantern in the pre-dawn darkness. He yelped and nearly fell when he saw Rhiannon, the first warning he got was her eyes reflecting his lamplight back. That left Rhiannon more than a little suspicious. It wasn’t that she thought her friend was hiding something malicious, she just wished he’d talk to her if he was questioning things. But, it wasn’t her business or her journey, and she resolved to stay out of it. Ron would talk when he was ready.

Between the full moon and the changed state of the school, Rhiannon didn’t get a free moment until later in the term on the third of April, just a couple of days after the new moon. She managed to slip free of Professor Kettleburn as he escorted them to lunch in the Great Hall after Care of Magical Creatures class, and hurried upstairs to fetch the diary from where she had hidden it in her clothes chest.

The first sense something was wrong came as she got to the top of the stairs, to find the door to the second-year girls’ dormitory standing open. No one else should be in here – she’d skipped lunch to get here early. And inside... Rhiannon stared, mouth agape, as she entered the room to find it torn apart. Her trunk was thrown wide open and her belongings scattered across the room. Her bedsheets had been lifted up and searched through, feathers drifted from a torn pillow that now lay under the bed. Calypso was under the bed too, trembling, with wide eyes and her thick mottled fur bushed out at all angles. She didn’t have to check for what was missing – she already knew what it would be. The thing she’d come there to get in the first place.

Rhiannon dropped her cane and got on her knees, crooning softly to coax the frightened feline out of hiding. Callie hissed at her and retreated, still trembling, and Rhiannon let her be. She pushed herself up off the ground and lurched over, almost falling onto her bed where she lay on her side, trembling herself and her breath coming too fast and too shortly. The room even smelled wrong. She didn’t have to ask herself who had done it, the intruder’s smell was everywhere and she rolled over and curled up as tears began to drip from her eyes. Ginny had been here. How she’d got in Rhiannon wasn’t sure – but it was just a password protecting the room, and her scent was everywhere. Hours old too, she guessed – Ginny must have broken in sometime that morning after everyone had left for classes, and Rhiannon hadn’t been back all day... Rhiannon hugged herself miserably and cried into the blanket – the mess was too big, too much, there was no-one here to help and she just, couldn’t. Not now.

Rhiannon wasn’t sure how long she’d lain there, but she was roused from her miserable huddle by a soft knock on the doorframe and someone’s quiet footsteps.

“Rhiannon? What’s going on?” a soft voice asked. Rhiannon pushed herself upright and hastily rearranged her disheveled hair and straightened her glasses, as Lavender Brown crossed the room to sit on the bed beside her. “Are you alright?”

Rhiannon shook her head and coughed weakly, wiping her face with her sleeve as she did so. “I just – it’s, s-ss-s-o-so much mess,” she whispered miserably. “And th-th-they – scared – they scared my cat.”

Gently, like she was approaching a wild animal, Lavender reached out and squeezed Rhiannon’s shoulder. When Rhiannon didn’t recoil from the touch she rubbed the smaller girl’s back in soothing circles. “I just came up to change my shirt, I got a spill on it at lunch. Will you be okay while I do that? I’ll help you clean up after.”

Rhiannon nodded after a brief pause, and Lavender got up to go and change. Rhiannon shivered and hugged herself, staring bleakly down at the pillow-fluff and scattered clothes and books that covered the floor. “Why are you being so nice to me?” she asked. “It’s – not that I don’t like you just – I didn’t think you liked me.”

Lavender, her shirt changed, came back and sat on the bed again, a short distance away. Her cheeks were flushed and she bit her lip. “I – didn’t. I’m sorry. It wasn’t even about you it was... I don’t know, you’re smart and pretty and everyone thinks I’m just pretty and I guess it made me feel insecure, and I took that out on you. And I had some stupid ideas... I thought, you weren’t a ‘real’ girl, why did you get to look prettier than me when I was? And that’s really bad, I know, I know - and I’m, really, really sorry about that. I was awful.”

Rhiannon spluttered, trying to tamp down an incredulous laugh – that was not appropriate right now. “Me? I – made you – insecure?” she managed, bewildered. Lavender nodded, her blush deepening. “But – you’re you – I feel like a lump next to you!”

Lavender looked up, a shy spark in her brown eyes. They shared a glance, and then both burst out laughing at the silliness of it all. “We could have just – talked it out – but I was being so terrible!” Lavender gasped helplessly, tears of laughter springing to her eyes. “I thought you were too – I don’t know, cool, to ever want to be friends with me and I made us into some kind of – I don’t know, rivals, in my head!”

Rhiannon giggled, and reached out to squeeze Lavender’s hand briefly. “I’d like to be friends,” she offered, and was rewarded with a shy smile from the other girl. “I think you’re plenty smart – you get things in Charms just as fast as I do, and you’re great in Creatures... I don’t know – I’m not good at girly stuff, yet. Parvati helped me get ready for the party but I mean – normal stuff. So I don’t feel like a-a-a-a- I don’t know, a swamp witch, all the time. And I can, I don’t know, help make History less boring.”

Lavender laughed, and stood, gesturing around them at the mess as she did so. “Girly stuff I can do, and that sounds – really nice. I’d like that. But I think we’ve got to clean this up first, c’mon,” she replied. She held out a hand to help Rhiannon up that Rhi accepted, and together they set about cleaning the room and chattering about comfortable topics like how Lavender’s party date had been, which then led onto how Rhiannon’s sort-of date had gone. Lavender was kind enough not to tease Rhiannon about her bewildering new feelings, but there was a mischievous tilt to her smile that said she just might later.

Lavender paused in their conversation and made a small sound of surprise. Rhiannon looked over at her and her heart sank as she saw the other girl holding a small glass bottle with a cork stopper. It was unlabeled, but the blue-violet liquid inside was unmistakeable to someone who knew what it was – and it seemed Lavender was one such. Rhiannon kept it for spares in case she broke a night’s dose or she had another accident of some kind, and it had been thrown out of the chest along with everything else.
“That’s what happened to you,” Lavender whispered, her eyes welling up with tears. She stood and walked over to where Rhiannon was straightening her bed-covers, and held out the bottle to her. “That’s why you’re always sore. This is Wolfsbane, isn’t it?”

Rhiannon looked up at Lavender, seeing only concern in her new friend’s eyes. She bit her lip and nodded silently. Lavender pressed the bottle into her hands and went back to sweeping up pillow fluff. “I won’t tell,” she reassured Rhiannon. “I’d never.”

Rhiannon shook her head, staring down at the bottle in her hands. “How – h-how did you know what it was?” she croaked, still staring at it. “S- ssss- Snape, hasn’t covered it in Potions yet.”

Lavender finished sweeping and set the broom against the wall beside the bathroom with a final clunk. She had her back to Rhiannon and her shoulders quivered as she hugged herself with a free arm.

“My dad’s one.” she whispered at last, turning back to Rhiannon as she did so. She hid from scrutiny under her hair, and from what little Rhiannon could see her face was streaked with tears. She sat down heavily on the end of her own bed, directly across the aisle from Rhiannon’s. “He was – he was turned, a couple months before school started last year.”

Rhiannon’s eyes widened, and she worried at her lower lip with her teeth. “I thought your dad wasn’t magical? How -”

Lavender cut her off, shaking her head as she did so. “Anyone can get it – it’s part of why it’s so dangerous. He’s really lucky my mum’s a witch and he knew a bit already, but... it’s worse for others who don’t know and they can really hurt people without meaning to.”

“I had – no idea... No wonder you were- difficult,” Rhiannon whispered lamely, to which Lavender shook her head.

“It’s part of the reason, maybe, but... it’s not an excuse. I was angry at everything but I still should’ve been decent to you and I wasn’t. I’d like to be now, if you’d let me – I think Dad would kick me if I wasn’t, now I know... Do your friends know?” Lavender asked.

Rhiannon nodded. “It was just Hermione, and Ron, Luna, Neville and my cousin, but I – I- hhhhh-h-had an accident with it at the end of January so now, more people know. I don’t know if that’s good or not. It’s... scary. But I’m dealing with it.”

Lavender smiled wanly and sniffed, wiping tears from her face. “I’m glad. Dad, he – he doesn’t talk, about the attack, but I know it was bad. He’s doing better, he’s even friends with the guy that bit him – it was a stupid accident, because they make that potion so expensive. But it was... bad, for a while, and I was here at school and – you had to go through all that. No wonder you scream in your sleep.” she sniffled miserably.

This time it was Rhiannon’s turn to smile, a wry, sad sort of thing but a smile nonetheless. “I-i-i-I guess that’s what Madam Pomfrey meant when she said I was doing a terrible job pretending to be asleep,” she joked, but it fell flat. “It – it was bad. Really, really bad. But I’m doing – better – way better, now. Really, I – I even like it sometimes, is that bad?”

Lavender’s smile was brighter this time, and she rummaged in the pocket of her school robe. “No, no – look,” she replied, and held out a photograph to Rhiannon. It was a moving wizarding photograph of a great brown werewolf, fully wolf-shape like Rhiannon and Dudley was rather than the sickly half-shape of those that had attacked her, the ones that haunted her nightmares. His fur lightened around his face and legs, and he played with a thoroughly chewed frisbee as someone, a tall woman with Lavender’s blonde hair, threw it for him and laughed.

“Is – is that him?” Rhiannon asked, a smile spreading over her face.

Lavender nodded and wiped away the last of her tears. “Yeah – it was my birthday yesterday. My cousin took this one time he was over for the full moon, and Mum and Dad sent it to me for my birthday. He doesn’t let me see him like that yet, and I guess I – couldn’t shake the worry that he’d get hurt or something.”

Rhiannon’s smile turned into a wry grimace – Lavender’s worry hadn’t exactly been out of the realm of possibility, given how Rhiannon’s own first turn had gone. But it reassured something in her to see that picture, of an adult just – playing with his wife as she laughed. Maybe in time she’d be ready to let her own closest friends see her.

“We’ve got Herbology last, d’you want to walk with me? I think Callie wants to be left alone,” Rhiannon offered, with a gesture to the cat who still huddled under the bed. Lavender laughed, and Rhiannon stowed the last of her scattered possessions back in the chest, including the wolfsbane, and shut it tightly.

The two of them set off in a companionable quiet down the many, many stairs to the ground floors, chatting about nothing in particular as they did so. Rhiannon was still on edge with the knowledge Tom Riddle’s – Voldemort’s – diary was back with Ginny, but she had started to relax with Lavender’s reassurance. She even laughed as Lavender told her a story about her dad - she referred to him by his first name, Luke, as if he were a family pet in case anyone overheard – chewing on her mother’s garden trellis. As such, she was totally unprepared for the crowd around the greenhouse entrance.

An incredibly frazzled Professor Sprout turned and saw them approaching, and she tried to keep Rhiannon away from the crowd even as it began to sink in what had happened. Not again. “No...” Rhiannon whispered, shaking her head numbly. “No, no, no-”

Lavender caught her by the shoulders, and at a jerk of the taller girl’s head Ron split from the crowd and joined her in holding Rhiannon back as she trembled. Tears stained her cheeks, her throat felt dry, all she could do was whisper the same two-letter word over and over. “No, no, no, no...” She sank to the ground, Ron and Lavender with her and sagged against Ron’s shoulder sobbing helplessly.

It wasn’t until Madam Pomfrey arrived that Rhiannon even moved. She flinched away from the nurse’s touch and stood, shaking off Ron and Lavender. The crowd of students had been sent away, she had an unimpeded view of her cousin as he lay frozen on the ground outside of Greenhouse Two. Rhiannon lurched over to him and fell to the ground, still murmuring through her sobs as she clung to Dudley’s jersey. Madam Pomfrey tried to pry her away so she could get Dudley onto a stretcher and she fell apart, screaming and sobbing and kicking, growling and snapping at any attempted touch, she couldn’t let herself be parted from him.

“Rhiannon,” Madam Pomfrey said calmly, though there was a brittle, fragile edge to her bedside tone. “Either you let go or I will have to use force. I can’t leave you and him out here all night.”

That cowed Rhiannon and she let her fingers be pried from their white-knuckled grip on Dudley’s sleeve. A gesture from Madam Pomfrey had Lavender and Ron back at her side, and they helped her up and into the castle, trailing just behind the teachers on the way to the hospital wing.
“I was – I was just letting him trim the ivy, tie the Luminous Sweet Peas up – little things, he’s such a nice lad, always patient with the tricky plants, and I thought he’d be alright in the greenhouses,” Professor Sprout explained through tears as they laid Dudley on the bed. Madam Pomfrey shushed her quietly and an older student, one of Madam Pomfrey’s helpers, was already dragging a bed over so that Rhiannon could stay close to her cousin. At a nod from Madam Pomfrey the student pushed Hermione’s bed over as well so that the empty one intended for Rhiannon lay between them, she would have to crawl over the end to reach it.

Ron helped Rhiannon into bed where she lay curled on her side, numb and cried out and shaking, between her two Petrified friends. Ron and Lavender both settled into chairs at the foot of the bed, gray-faced and trembling themselves. One of Madam Pomfrey’s attendants draped a blanket around their shoulders and another over Rhiannon, and gradually the ward fell quiet as Rhiannon’s body demanded she sleep. She was in no state to resist and her friends watched with an exhausted sort of relief as the small tousle-haired girl’s ragged breathing slowed and she settled into sleep. Things would look just as bleak in the morning, but – rest, at least, couldn’t hurt her.