Hunter of the Perished World

[73] Surviving, and Living (4)

What an ironic situation it is to not be able to bring out both the words to be together for each other.

Leona found out that she had to be unhappy in the wilderness, so she fell in love with her own self-indulgence, unable to say selfishly to come together because of the tragic fact that she was ultimately a stumbling block.

Tomorrow, when the armored car is ready, they leave Harbin Fortress.

Originally, Leona’s goal was to find a place to live, and Fortress was the perfect place to be compared to the heavens beyond meeting her wishes.

Leona sits on a bench with Sarah. The other children were harassing the executioner and asking questions. It was a funny situation, just before Ramfil’s iron mask broke, but Leona couldn’t smile.

“Leona, are you staying here? Are we staying?”

Sarah asked with a big smile. She may have acted as Warlord’s daughter, with a frowny look and a kind gesture, but Sarah was a really good girl. If Sarah hadn’t come, Leona would have been wandering around the lodge. Sarah helped Leona on both sides of the water to have a pleasant time at Fortress.

Sarah had an unsuspecting look on her face because she believed Leona would stay here.

Monsters on the ground will have no effect on themselves. So you can live with your own essence.

But every time I saw Sarah looking at herself with that look on her face, Leona felt different even though she was enjoying it.

The children of Fortress, who never had a moment to worry about their survival, think that today is just fun and tomorrow is just fun. They think it’s fun to talk about Leona growing up in a rough environment.

No one showed any malice to themselves, but Leona felt a sense of ignorance every time she saw those children for no reason.

It’s a sense of superiority, including inferiority.

The overwhelming sense of self that we’ve been through a little more than these kids.

I felt inferiority when I saw the inherent goodness of children who could live without thinking of such things.

Leona’s life was at stake, even though she fell short of a struggle right away. How many people have you killed so far?

Just as Leona felt when she saw that dirt was clean, she realized that she couldn’t be fully immersed with her children.

Sarah lives where what she thinks is going to happen. Leona, on the other hand, had more things that she couldn’t have, and had to fight for survival, not every day.

Good kid.They ‘re good people.

Leona thought so and really enjoyed it.

But they were good people, but they didn’t want to be together. At the end of the day, only the rounded side of the stone is showing. Will they still be able to show the same smile when they see that part?

Unlike these children, Leona has seen far too much of humanity’s disgust.

Slatters, needless to say, are killing people for a penny all over the world.

After all, this fortress has only covered one skin of human nature.

With that in mind, Leona was unable to answer Sarah’s smile.

That night,

Fortress’ back was turned off with minimal light. Life in the basement depends on whether the main lamp is turned on and off, unlike on the ground. Literally, it artificially regulated day and night.

Outgoing is the time to sleep, unless you are a special worker. Ramfil, Jean, and Leona Seth were also in the room.

Ramfil enters the room and asks you to sleep, and Leona lies in her own bed.

If you live in Fortress, you have this room, you have your own house, and you just have to do what you’re told to do to live this life.

No one will refuse this offer.

Leona knows better than anyone that Jean doesn’t need herself. It will take at least five to ten years to become a hunter who can do his part.

Everything he wanted to say is in here.

But Leona never closes her eyes. Gin leaves tomorrow. Leona was distracted, even though she knew it wasn’t right.

Bait….

Leona went out to the living room to drink some water.

“ ……. ”

Then Gene, sitting still on the couch, met his eyes.

“Ah…. Now, I can’t sleep…”

Gene nods as if to say so. Leona lies on the couch across from Gin. Even though it was underground, I didn’t feel that the air was suffocating. It might be a good place to live your whole life.

Is that so?

When I think about it,

Gene told me.

“You’ll remember I’ve lived a long life.”

“Yes.”

Jin looks down, looking at Leona and slowly says.

“I met a lot of people.”

I helped someone, fought with them, got help, and became important to each other. Although Jean did not specifically explain what meeting was, Leona seemed to know her mind a little.

No, no, no.

I don’t think I do. Leona walks right past you.

Hunter! Thank you! ‘

A child waves to Gin holding her mother’s hand. Immediately after that, Gene encounters the body of a child torn apart by a monster in the same ruined village.

I’ve always saved someone.

From the monster, I rescued, rescued, and protected someone from the humans. However, they always appeared before Gene as unwelcome guests. Or, just die somewhere and never see him again.

Humans die.

No one else in the world feels as frivolous as this natural proposition.

“Hunters! Protect us!” ‘

A screamer in the middle of a swarm of monsters.

Hunter!

A young boy running from the slatters’ junk wagon is shot in the head and killed.

‘I don’t want to die….’

Someone who was bitten by the lower half died saying so.

‘Please, just a child…’

Some people hung on Jean to keep her alive even as a newborn child was dying.

All of them, Gene once protected. Gene witnessed their death, or never saw them again. It was common for the village that was once saved to become ashes, and it was also common for Slater to feast in the flesh.

Even if the person who saved me became a slater and became a killer, I have witnessed countless things.

Why are you so obsessed with chips?

It is not just because it prolongs life.

Leona realizes that.

Gene, who appeared to be a perfect hunter, was only perfect as a hunter.

Gene as a human has always failed.

Relationships, affections, friendships, relationships, love. I have repeated only failures. No one has been able to keep them intact, and no one has seen them happy. I even had to kill those I loved with my own hands.

The world was cruel enough not to have a single happiness. I couldn’t stop the sadness that overwhelmed the place where I left.

I’ve only succeeded in survival. With repeated failures in everything else, the hunter is dull.

And then, it collapsed.

If you have to be the perfect hunter, you just have to be the hunter. In this miserable, dreary and cruel world, Gene has lived too long to be human.

So, I just wanted to be a hunter.

Why are you so obsessed with chips?

It’s because it’s more comfortable that way. It’s because it’s less painful. If you don’t love anything, nothing will hurt you. If you are obsessed with nothing, you feel nothing.

Inevitably, it had to be.

‘Killing a few demons won’t change anything.’

A blonde boy mutters with a sad expression in front of the dead woman’s face. Next to it is the wretched corpse of a mangled monster.

‘I will quit the demon-hunter.’

The shape of the man crumbles and the other looks touch.

‘You’re gonna miss me.’

At the Hall of the Dark Castle, a woman kneels in blood and says,

‘Because of what I was born, I don’t believe in what I live for.’

A woman in a junk wagon smiles.

In that instant, Leona glanced at hundreds of memories. I don’t fully understand it, but the deep emotions conveyed there were too heavy to call grief.

It should be called despair. Jean looks at Leona, not knowing what she saw.

What about the hunter who tried to be careless about everything now?

Leona couldn’t fully understand Jean’s feelings, but she was suffocated by the sight of them. Can a person live with that feeling?

I can live through this.

After experiencing these things.

I can still walk with someone.

The Gene now knows that all relationships are bound by destruction and despair. However, compared to Jean’s long life, she is walking with Leona for a short time.

I think I know now why Gene wants to keep a constant distance from himself, why his expression gets so hard every now and then, and why he wants to put himself somewhere safe.

That’s why Leona couldn’t even ask me to come with her. I saw a lot of things, but it was a moment close, and Gene looked at Leona and said,

“I’ve faced too many bad endings.”

The hunter has no choice but to pursue the tragedy, and for Jean, it is a destiny. On Jin’s face, a strange face is revealed. Gene laughs, but he laughs like he’s desperate.

“Leona.”

“Yes…”

“In pity, you told me you were a coward.”

I’ve been there.

‘You’re a coward.’

I once left Gene saying that. Leona wanted to bite off her tongue for saying that. Gene nods.

“Yes, I am a coward. Fear a lot of things.”

I’m not afraid of monsters and slatters, I’m afraid of people. I’m afraid of all the humans that remain human. I’m afraid of people who are coming.

So Gene was afraid of Leona, not some wimpy white witch hiding somewhere.

Gene is afraid of Leona.

“I’ve failed too much, too much…. I’ve made a mistake.I can’t… I don’t want to face that end.”

Before, Gin’s gentle tone contained deep sadness.

Humans die one day. You will die one day. As long as he lives in this world, he will die someday. So, I don’t want to see you die but die in front of me.

The person who realized that it was impossible to live by guarding something was forced to say so. I fear that Leona will die before my eyes once again. That’s why I’m afraid of her.

Leona found out that the only thing she said to me was that it would end up hurting Jean.

Instead, Leona bites her teeth in the face of Jean’s deep despair. But Leona didn’t just learn about Jean’s thoughts briefly.

Just as Leona fears loneliness and loneliness, so does this old hunter.

Gin also lives in solitude and solitude, but she doesn’t like it. I just accepted that I had to live like that.

“You’re lonely, too.”

“…….”

“You need me.”

Gene doesn’t answer.

“You could live here. I know it would be better. But….”

Leona tightens her neck and speaks slowly, but clearly.

“I don’t need to be here.”

Although Portless can accept Leona, Leona is not a person who needs her. But what about now?

“But I need you.”

“…….”

“And he needs me, too. I think so. So we… We’re talking about this.”

We don’t have to talk about this if we don’t need each other. I just want to break up. But Gene told Leona why she needed to be torn, and she couldn’t help but worry about him.

In the end, it is not a laughable situation to keep picking up and serving the reasons why we need to part.

No one needs me, but a comfortable life.

Living with someone who is dangerous but needs each other.

Which life would you choose?

Everyone will be different, but Leona’s choice was made.

Leona’s will hardened in the face of Gin’s memory.

“You said it’s a more human life to think about living, not surviving.”

“I did.”

That was in the sense of guaranteeing a life of pursuit of something other than survival in this comfortable life in Fortress.

Survival requires guns and bread.

But what more is there to live for?

After all, Leona only wants bread at Fortress. After all, it’s not a life, it’s a life that just survives. Rather, this tranquil environment just throws Leona into perfect survival.

Leona looks at Gin with a serious look. It contains only complete sincerity with no lies, falsehoods, or profanities.

Say it.

“I’m not here to survive. I want to be with you in order to live.”

Gene is tied to what he says. Leona wanted to be alone with this old hunter. When I realized why I had to push myself away, I couldn’t help myself.

Leona says to live for life, why do you insist on only surviving? You need more than guns and bread to live. And Leona and Jean can be more than just each other.

Leona believed so.

“…….”

Gene closes his eyes in front of this foolish and wise boy. A long time later, Gene opens his eyes. With red eyes, Gene speaks slowly.

“Leona, I have lived a life forged by mistakes and failures.”

Jinn’s voice was trembling.

“So…”

Gene resigned, or else it was his destiny as well.

“Even if you add one more to all those mistakes, it’ll be okay.”

After all, repeating the same mistake over and over again may not only be foolish.

Knowing that it will fail and deciding to repeat the same mistake, it will also be great in some sense.

It doesn’t matter if you add one to many scars. I don’t say it out loud, but I don’t say it out loud. After all, even one of the many scars is a clear wound.

Leona also knows what Jean’s decision made as she faced the consequences. Jinn had failed every relationship for a hundred years, knowing the outcome and choosing a relationship that was only painful once again. I don’t know about anyone else, but Leona knows how hard Jean’s choice was.

Tuk

That’s why Leona cried without my knowledge.

Leona steals the eye area by hand. However, one tear burst out of my eyes. Without crying, Leona takes a deep breath and hides the tears.

“Ugh…”

You can’t solve anything with tears.

But even knowing that, there are certain moments that must be mistaken.