I Became A Playwright In Medieval Fantasy

“Why is that? Do you think our sister is lacking as a bride?”

The boy, perhaps taking my reaction as rejection, soon started rambling about my sister’s pros and cons.

“Think about it! Our sister is the most beautiful in the Empire, and moreover, she’s the Crown Princess set to inherit the throne! If you marry our sister, you’ll be the country’s official consort!”

“Official consort?”

“Of course you know! She can be a little rough around the edges! Once married, she’ll hold her husband tightly! If you prefer a delicate lady, it might not fit!”

The Crown Prince seemed to be pondering excuses, sealing his lips tightly. Before long, he spoke in a determined tone.

“But, yes! They say there’s a saying in the world! Men are meant for women, and women are meant for men!”

…Are you a 60-year-old grandpa or what? Who told you that saying?

“Your Highness, please calm down a bit. It would be better to clear your head and speak…”

“Come on, think about it! The conditions fit perfectly, so we can adjust our preferences after marriage, right? Right?”

Now, his lime-colored eyes were spinning absurdly.

It seemed he greatly wanted to be the consort of the illustrious Klauswitz family.

‘Was the Cthulhu Mythos that impactful?’

Well, as a horror fanatic, if he’s fainted, I’d want to feed the writer dumplings.

But even so, to attempt negotiations by offering his own sister as a prize…

Seriously, did he think someone was hiding behind that mask? Without knowing their identity, appearance, or personality?

Just then, as I was about to give a word of comfort seeing the boy getting overly excited…

“Oho?”

A cold voice mixed with laughter suddenly came from behind.

“I rushed over when I heard you fainted. You’re having quite the interesting conversation, little brother.”

“Hik?! S-sister!”

Standing with her arms crossed and a smile was Diana von Klauswitz, the Crown Princess of the Holy Empire.

…However, that smile was not a normal smile at all.

“By the way, Wolfgang?”

While maintaining her composure, she concealed a sharp dagger behind her demeanor.

It was the haughty rage of a female cat revealing its claws and fangs before its prey.

“Why do you think you can decide this sister’s marriage on your own?”

“U-uh, that, um…”

The Crown Prince’s pupils vibrated like there was an earthquake. It seemed he finally had a grasp of his blundering remarks.

He looked exactly like a mouse that had encountered a cat.

… Watching this, I sighed and defended the boy.

“Your Highness, please hold on. He just woke up and is still a bit dazed.”

“Hm?”

“That previous conversation was just a dream-like rambling due to the aftermath of fainting. Please don’t blame him for my carelessness in inviting you to a horror play.”

“P-Pant…!”

The 13-year-old boy’s eyes sparkled as if he were deeply moved by my actions.

At that moment, Crown Princess Diana slowly uncrossed her arms.

Her lustrous blonde hair flowed over her alluring figure.

“Is that so? Is that what you’re saying?”

In the next instant, an enticing smile bloomed on the princess’s lips like a sunflower.

“Then it’s only right that I scold you in place of my little brother, isn’t it, Wolfgang?”

“Eh?!”

The Prince’s face instantly turned to that of someone struck by thunder.

Then, the princess added with a sly gaze directed at her brother.

“Didn’t you just say it’s all Phantom’s fault? Then naturally, it’s Phantom who should be scolded. Doesn’t that seem logical?”

“N-no! If you put it that way, sister…”

“What are you doing? Get out of the room, Phantom.”

The princess elegantly turned her back, cheerfully ignoring her flustered brother.

And then, she walked away leisurely, swaying her hips as if to show off.

“You should be prepared for a serious scolding. I am quite angry right now.”

“S-sister! Wait! It’s a misunderstanding! Sister! Sister-!!”

The Crown Prince, unable to move properly, was flustered in confusion.

Turning my back to him, I quietly followed the princess’s orders and left the room.

—

“So? How would you like to be scolded, Phantom?”

On the terrace of the palace after leaving the Prince’s room, the princess asked while basking in the sunlight.

I shrugged and replied.

“Well? I’m not particularly wanting to be scolded.”

“Oho? Are you belittling me, the Crown Princess?”

No, there was no belittling at all.

“Aren’t you teasing the Crown Prince too much? I thought he was genuinely panicking over the possibility of punishment since he just regained consciousness.”

“Well, if my little brother was messing around with his sister, he deserves some punishment. After all, he tried to sell off the future Crown Princess without permission.”

With a joyful grin, her lime-colored eyes were filled with mirth. With no sibling watching, the pretense seemed to vanish.

I decided to ask a question I wanted to know for a while.

“By the way, what is that outfit you’re wearing, Your Highness? I’m sorry, but no matter how I look at it…”

“Ah, I see. A true creator can spot it right away.”

The princess lifted her skirt playfully, raising the corners of her mouth.

“How do I look? Does it suit me? I’m trying on the female protagonist’s outfit from ‘Mage Workshop Times.’”

The attire was like that of ‘Edna’ in Charlie Chaplin’s classic, Modern Times, at the ending.

A hat adorned with flowers, a cute ribbon around the neck, and a form-fitting dress.

At first glance, she seemed less like a proud princess and more like a lively and charming city lady.

‘Has she become fond of character cosplay since Cleopatra?’

As I took that in, I chuckled and replied.

“There’s no outfit that doesn’t suit you, Your Highness.”

That wasn’t just flattery.

In reality, Diana was so refined that she could pull off any look.

Her face was stunning, her figure was magnificent, and every little movement exuded grace.

If only her personality was a bit less fox-like, she would be truly flawless.

“I’ve heard the news. The new Cthulhu Mythos you made was a gift for my brother’s birthday?”

At that moment, Diana tilted her head slightly and asked.

“I’m curious. My birthday is coming up soon, so will you give me something like Wolfgang?”

“…Are you saying you want a birthday gift from me?”

“That’s how siblings work. If one side receives something, it’s natural for jealousy to arise.”

“Ah, I see.”

It seemed there might be some truth to that.

Even if they are close, siblings would inevitably feel displeased if one got something while the other didn’t.

My twin nieces from my past life showed similar traits too.

“So what does Your Highness desire? Perhaps the opportunity to choose the theme for the next project like the Crown Prince? I was just about to start conceiving ideas for the new work now that the premiere of Cthulhu Mythos is done.”

“No? I’m not really interested in that. Rather…”

The slender hand of the princess rose subtly.

Thereafter, her right-hand index finger gently touched my chin.

The sweet fragrance that resembled a tangy fruit lingered close to my nose for a moment.

“How about going on a date with me once you complete the next project? Just the Crown Princess and Phantom, cozy without guards or attendants.”

“Y-you…?”

A date? Is it that kind of date I know?

“Are you serious? Or is this just a joke?”

“Who knows? Which one could it be? Think about it, Phantom.”

Having said that, the princess turned her back and walked down the corridor.

I gazed at her every graceful stride, as confusion enveloped me.

It must be a joke, right?

Yeah, there’s no way she really said that.

It’s probably just some nonsense she threw out to tease me, like the countless playful exchanges we’ve had through letters.

—

The day after the fainting incident with the Crown Prince.

“Sanchipinchi Sanchipinchi~ ♫”

The theme song from a certain Japanese anime that moé-fied the original Cthulhu Mythos.

Humming and walking lightly, I was on my way to the Vanderbeune Theater.

Didn’t the Prince collapse under the troupe’s roof?

Since everyone should know the subsequent developments, I was on my way to convey the news in person.

“Shanti Shanti Kare Kareya~ ♬”

The parody song that came with the famous piece, Love Is the Slave of Chaos.

Entering the interior of the Vanderbeune tent while reciting a tune only a few knew, I heard…

“Wow, he’s here!”

“W-we made a mistake! Please forgive us!”

“P-please let us go! It was unintentional!”

The members, who had been waiting with anxious expressions, instantly dropped to their knees.

Starting from the leader, Fluffy, the apprentice witch, Morgan, and various other non-humans, all bowed in unison.

“It wasn’t intentional! We are just poor wandering players! We had no intention of harming the Crown Prince!”

“Y-you’re right! We live from day to day, why would we plot rebellion! It was truly an accident!”

“It was all my fault for directing the play too terrifyingly! If you must execute someone, kill me, the leader Fluffy, as an example! Spare the others!”

“N-no! If you think about it, it’s mainly my fault for mixing the hypnotic spell too effectively! If necessary, I’ll sacrifice my humble self as the apprentice witch, so please show mercy…!”

Fluffy was passionately banging his head on the ground, and Morgan was already on the floor, breathing heavily.

Watching their antics, I quickly spoke up.

“Leader? It’s me, Phantom. I’m not a royal envoy.”

“Ah! So you were Phantom the writer…!”

Only then did the performers slowly rise, obviously relieved.

Fluffy, looking around nervously, asked carefully.

“How is the Crown Prince? Is there any serious injury?”

“No injuries. He merely lost consciousness due to shock, so please don’t worry.”

I gently patted Fluffy’s mask while trying to speak as kindly as possible.

“And this incident won’t lead to any punishment for Vanderbeune from the royal family. The responsibilities primarily fall to the Crown Prince.”

“R-really? Can we really work without worry?”

“Of course! I guarantee that as a candidate of the Hero of the Pen.”

With those words, Fluffy fell limp in relief.

Morgan, standing beside him, collapsed to the floor, letting out deep breaths.

The reactions of the other members were largely similar.

“But everyone? There’s something urgent I need to tell you.”

Clearing my throat, I brought forth the news from the palace.

“Everyone, please don’t panic. Regarding the latest performance, His Highness Crown Prince Wolfgang wishes to…

“EEEK?! So the assurance was a white lie! Is the Crown Prince coming to get us in a rage?!”

“Aaaah! No, please! I’ll prepare to apologize stark naked! It won’t feel sincere otherwise!”

“No! That’s not it! Don’t be scared!”

I hurriedly soothed the panic spreading through the tent as I pulled out a card from my pocket.

It was a small proof document coated with semi-transparent premium material.

“This is a gift from the Crown Prince to the Vanderbeune Theatre. He was very pleased with your performance of the Cthulhu Mythos, and wishes for the continued prosperity of the troupe.”

“A gift?”

“A gift for real? What did he give us?”

Smiling, I handed the card to Fluffy.

“It is free teleportation ticket. It’s valid indefinitely. Not only the troupe but also each member can use it.”

“HIEEK?!”

“Free teleportation ticket?!”

The astonished members of the troupe turned to one another in disbelief, clearly unable to tell if it was a dream or reality.

Teleportation devices had always been strictly regulated by the Imperial government.

The examination processes and conditions to gain usage permits were rather difficult.

Usually, only government officials or wealthy nobles had restricted access, right?

Yet this humble troupe, made up of non-humans, received such privilege? The shock was overwhelming.

“Use this freely to ensure there are no obstacles to traveling within the country. Therefore, continue to pour your hearts into the puppet shows with gratitude to His Highness!”

“Is this really ours? This isn’t a joke or a prank, right?!”

“I’m quite upset! Do you think I’m someone who jokes about these things, Leader? It’s definitely the real deal.”

“……”

A heavy silence fell over the room.

Neither I, nor Fluffy, nor any of the members uttered a word.

Breaking that silence was Fluffy’s overwhelmed sob.

“Wah… Huh…”

Fluffy’s eyes glistened with tears.

After a while, she wiped her eyes and said,

“It’s a blessing! Thank you so much, Phantom!”

“Eh? What for?”

“It’s all thanks to the script of the Cthulhu Mythos you wrote! Thanks to you, we’ve been given such a blessing!”

Fluffy smiled, her shoulders shaking with emotions.

It was a beautiful smile filled with happiness and elation.

“Of course, the treatment won’t dramatically change overnight! But finally, we, the wanderers, feel like we’re recognized as proper members of the Empire! I won’t forget this grace until the day I die!”

“That’s right! Thank you, Phantom the writer!”

“You are our benefactor! Hahaha!”

“Sob, sob! Truly a great author! To bestow such a heavy blessing upon our Vanderbeune with a new work…!”

The members of the troupe chimed in, sharing Fluffy’s exuberance.

Amidst the colorful members, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

‘To think the real H. P. Lovecraft was a vehement racist.’

His cosmism, a fear of the unknown and destruction, somewhat aligns with that racism.

Different civilizations with cultures entirely distinct from Western white society.

Hatred and wariness towards them are some of the central themes of Lovecraft’s works.

He actively believed in conspiracies against Jews and promoted strict racial segregation to prevent societal collapse, denouncing Black people as inferior races tainting Western bloodlines.

Yet, in this world, the very beings discriminated against—like orcs and beastmen—have come to embody the essence of the horror Lovecraft sought?

This might just be the ironic terror mentioned in his piece The Forbidden House?

—

Though there was a strange incident involving several people fainting, the premiere of my new work, Cthulhu Mythos, continued smoothly.

Including the horror enthusiast, Crown Prince Wolfgang, who had been knocked out, the disaster turned out to serve as noise marketing.

Thanks to that, the Vanderbeune troupe thrived in the capital for a while.

Acquiring data from the excessively high threshold of fear set during the premiere, they offered tailored services according to audience preferences.

A version only allowed for real horror aficionados with extreme spice.

And for those who wanted a milder experience, they arranged a gentle version as well.

…But that didn’t mean an incident like the premiere wouldn’t recur.

“Brehhh, hurl!–“

“Quick, move him outside! We must ensure he can breathe!”

“Kihihhik, hee! Honestly, I think Cthulhu is weaker than Hastur!”

“What kind of nonsense is that, you pink elephant?”

“What are these humans babbling about again? Get them sent to the priests!”

Every time Cthulhu Mythos went up, fainting incidents occurred with alarming regularity.

Not only did the spicy version have that, even those who underestimated the mild version saw audience members collapsing left and right.

Sometimes the emergency team waiting in the back found themselves fainting while watching the performance.

It was a truly bizarre chain of events where two went in and four were carried out.

“Damn it! What trouble it is to perform Cthulhu Mythos! Every single time!”

“Damn it, did the rookie faint again?! Who’s that useless mentor of theirs?!”

“Ah, we have replicating patients!”

Day by day, various happenings due to Cthulhu Mythos unfolded in the capital.

…Until suddenly, rumors of unknown origin started circulating through the streets.

“The Necronomicon is a real magic book!”

“Howard Phillips Lovecraft is not a fictional character but a real person!”

A bizarre rumor, half-truth and half-lie, spread across the realm.

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