I Can’t Run Away From the Girl Who Saved Me

18 – Sleeping (4)

＊

“Sil, Mr. Sylvia?”

Sylvia hugged me.

More precisely, it looked like he was trying to get my body into his arms.

As she held me in her arms, she muttered in a trembling voice as if she was casting a spell.

“You can’t go anywhere, you can’t go out anymore, you won’t let me go. Never, never.”

I was very embarrassed by her sudden hug, but I quietly smiled and hugged her back.

Sylvia-san’s body trembled as if she hadn’t thought that I would be able to hug her.

I put my cheek on her shoulder and whispered quietly.

“… are you okay.”

I couldn’t get through that hard night and refuse her simple request for nothing more than a hug.

Contrary to her girlish demands, it was because the sight she had seen last night was so shocking.

Even now, the scene of her self-injury, which I saw through the slightly opened door, remained so vivid in my mind.

“Sylvia-san knows that I’m not going anywhere.”

She strangled herself in her sleep.

Suffering from nightmares, she broke into a cold sweat until the sheets were damp.

A very disastrous downfall and harsh fate given to her, the undisputed warrior who defeated the demon king.

She felt sorry for her and felt very guilty.

I felt particularly guilty and sorry that my three-inch tongue had pushed her, but

More than that, the fact that I didn’t know that she, who had made achievements worthy of being praised as a person living in this world, had locked herself in this place and was waiting for her to slowly die.

“I have no intention of going anywhere, leaving Sylvia alone.”

I, too, have not yet digested all the misfortunes that have happened to me well beyond my mind.

The emotions burned and wounded my throat as if they had swallowed a hot fireball, and were still bubbling and boiling in my stomach when they arrived.

A torn throat often made me vomit, and a hot stomach made me so sensitive that even I was startled, or made me shed tears.

But… no, rather, that’s why I was able to reach her.

I got to this forest because my uncle killed my parents and was after me and my sister.

I was able to find her because I had a carriage accident.

Of course, it’s still a painful memory, and it’s true that it’s such a terrible misfortune that every morning I wish it was all a dream.

Still sitting in front of Layla’s grave, I, like Sylvia, would feel an irresistible urge to die.

But, biting my tongue and biting my lips, holding back the urge and waiting, Ms. Sylvia always returned to me smiling and holding her prey.

I also don’t think it’s bad if I became that kind of existence to her.

Just like how Sylvia made my sister’s grave, if I can alleviate her pain even a little bit, wouldn’t all the misfortune and pain that happened to me have some meaning?

I thought so and hugged her back even tighter.

“So… it’s okay.”

“…ash.”

My left shoulder, where she buried her face, was slowly wet with something hot and damp.

I put a hand up and stroked her blond hair.

“The day I was cursed, Sylvia-san said that.”

“…”

“…Uh”

“…”

“What was that…”

I broke the mood like an idiot.

There was definitely something left in my head, but since it was a fairly long sentence, I couldn’t spit it out straight away.

“…poof,”

Sylvia-san ate as she buried her face in my shoulder.

I couldn’t hide my embarrassment and spit out the sentences in a stammered voice with a cracked voice.

“Ah, that… What kind of desire, wanting to get out of boredom? It wasn’t because of that… selfish mind that I couldn’t go out. What did you mean?”

“…”

Instead of answering, she nodded her head on my shoulder.

“…how about being a little selfish. He is the warrior who defeated the demon king.”

“…”

“So I’m not going anywhere. huh? Don’t worry.”

When I finished talking, she hugged me tightly.

So we hugged each other in the cabin for a while.

Silvia finally let me go after lunchtime, when I usually woke up rubbing my eyes, and slowly opened her mouth.

“Thank you… Ash.”

Sylvia-san smiled lightly as she said that.

Her swollen eyes were as red as the eyes of the two of us.

The skin and hair, on the other hand, were very pale in comparison.

To be honest, it was a bizarre look that might look a little scary, but for some reason it looked so pretty in my eyes.

In the bright sunlight coming in from the window, her pale hair and skin were as transparent as the wings of a fairy, and her smiling face through the veil-like hair of the bride was as beautiful as a goddess.

＊

Now, a few days after that, our cohabitation life was showing some differences compared to before.

Most of the difference was due to Mr. Sylvia’s change.

For example, after that day, Mr. Sylvia began to demand direct ‘compensation’ after going hunting.

At first, I was a little nervous about her request for a reward, but at most the reward she wanted was to hug her tightly and say ‘good job’.

I said that I could do this at any time without any compensation, but Mr. Sylvia said it with a firm attitude.

“I thought it would become a habit if I kept receiving hugs like this for no reason.”

She asked him not to hug her except for compensation.

Her request seemed to refrain from feeling a crush on me, so I felt a bit sad, but in the end I had no choice but to agree to her words.

That’s right, because we weren’t lovers.

Of course, the only person I would be with for the rest of my life would be her, but that didn’t necessarily mean we had to fall in love.

It sounded a bit cold, but I read somewhere that people love people is just a process for breeding after all.

If that were true, she and I didn’t have to make love.

Considering our curse, even if she and I were married, we would never be able to have children.

I wouldn’t want to go through the experience of killing a child with my own hands.

That’s why it was the best distance for us to remain as close friends and colleagues who soothe each other’s loneliness.

A lifelong companion and colleague.

right there.

I made that promise, thinking about the worst situation that premature love could bring.

Besides, in the first place, she was only craving the warmth of others, and she probably didn’t love me either.

Her restrictions also felt right for both of us.

And another problem arose right at this point.

The second change that has occurred over the past few days is that she has been asking me to sleep with her every day.

It was a direct threat to my earlier decision to exclude love from our relationship.

Of course, I don’t think she meant anything else.

She just doesn’t want to feel lonely, alone in the cold, dark night.

However, I refused and rejected this request to the end.

She wasn’t the problem, I was the problem.

The problem was that I couldn’t stand it next to her toned body exposed in her thin pajamas.

Of course, if I attacked her, she would literally be able to knock me down with one hand, so I don’t even dare to try to insult her.

I didn’t have the confidence to keep my composure with the body of a beautiful woman by my side every day.

In the end, Sylvia withdrew her request to sleep with me after promising to hold my hand and stay by my side until I fell asleep on a day when I was about to have a nightmare.

But after that day, Mr. Sylvia started to sleep with the door of her bedroom, which was tightly closed every night, wide open.

As if telling them to come in at any time, they prop up a chair to the door and fall asleep peacefully in their defenseless pajamas.

It must be nice to be trusted, but for some reason I couldn’t shake the thought that she was making fun of me.

Anyway, thanks to her sleeping with her door open, I was able to fall asleep listening to her even breathing every night.

“…”

No, I couldn’t sleep.

I ended up not being able to sleep at night.

This was the biggest change and the biggest problem among the changes in the past few days.

My daily life pattern, which has changed between day and night, still hasn’t returned.

“…I’m going to die of sleep.”

Of course, just because the night and day changed didn’t mean I didn’t sleep at all, but since I shouldn’t have fallen asleep before Sylvia came back from hunting, I forced myself to lie down and stay awake, resting or lightly napping each day.

The dinner I was making was just a simple dish that I couldn’t say was very good by my standards, but I knew very well how anxiously Mr. Sylvia was waiting for that simple dish.

Dinner time with me in this forest, where there is virtually no entertainment, would be her only, albeit small, pleasure.

That’s why I didn’t want to disappoint Sylvia-san.

Rather than disappointing her by falling asleep irresponsibly, it seemed much better to hold on until the pattern returned, even if my body was a little tired.

After all, I spent the day forcibly moving my body or somehow trying not to fall asleep.

And at the end of the dangerous cooking process, so that it would not be strange if she was injured at any time in a dreamy spirit, and after serving her delicious food, the night came soon.

But at night, these damned eyes went black again.

One of the reasons is that I have a constitution that is difficult to change once the pattern is disturbed, but the door she left wide open was also one of the factors that made me care.

“Ha-am… what should I cook today?”

Today, I forcibly lifted my heavy eyelids and wandered around the cabin for no reason. I went into the kitchen and checked the vegetables and herbs I would use today.

There weren’t that many different kinds of vegetables prepared anyway, so the vegetables to be served with were not very different regardless of the result of her hunting, but there were ingredients that were a little more suitable or vice versa.

Anticipating that Sylvia might not catch fish today, I opened the lid of the basket containing the dried herbs.

“…Ah, no.”

The herbs were all gone.

Just in case, I checked the basket of mushrooms and other vegetables.

“Ah… it’s a big deal.”

Most of them have already run out or only have one or two left.

I should have checked in advance, but it seemed that I hadn’t paid attention to it because I had only slept for two or three hours a day for several days already.

Looking at the sun shining outside the window, there were probably only a few hours left until Mr. Sylvia returned.

There was no time to hesitate.

I took an empty basket and left the cabin.

“Maybe in an hour or so…”

Sylvia was very anxious if I wasn’t seen where I was supposed to be.

Her anxiety didn’t just pop up over the past few days.

Even before she showed her face to me, the day I went to Lila’s grave with my still-not-healed leg, she was very embarrassed and searched for me.

On the first day I went out to gather herbs and vegetables, the fact that she sniffed my futon was also a strange behavior caused by my disappearance.

At first, I thought it was separation anxiety caused simply by fear of loneliness or loneliness, but after thinking about it, I realized that it might not be the only thing.

Since I was cursed right on her, it was clear that if I impulsively left the forest, there would be catastrophe in the world.

As a hero, it would be natural to be wary of such situations.

I also didn’t want the world to be ruined because of me, and I didn’t want to make her anxious.

“I have to go quickly before Mr. Sylvia comes.”

The full-scale gathering can be done tomorrow, so I thought it wouldn’t take too long if I picked just enough to eat for dinner today.

I cradled the basket by my side and slowly entered the woods.

＊

“ash! I’m here.”

Sylvia opened her cabin door and naturally spread her arms.

It was a smooth posture change like flowing water, just like the movement that followed the opening of the door.

However, no answer came from anywhere in the cabin.

“… ash?”

I didn’t even feel the popularity.

Normally, Ash would have lit candles in advance to match the time of darkness, but now the cabin was dark.

It felt as if I had gone back to before Ash appeared.

Sylvia felt goosebumps running down her spine.

Even the hairs on the back of his head seemed to stand on end.

“… no.”

Sylvia frantically searched the cabin.

does not exist.

Nowhere.

She threw the wild duck on the ground and ran toward the graveyard.

It wasn’t even in the graveyard.

Sylvia suddenly let out a scream.

Her shrill voice echoed through the woods.

“ash! Where have you gone!”

what to do What do we do. where did you go

Sylvia was stepping on the grass in the graveyard, unable to do anything about it.

what’s up, what’s going on

Why is there no Ash?

Could something happen?

Did I fall into the river?

Sylvia ran straight to the river.

But Ash was nowhere to be found.

Seeing that there were no footprints on the sandy beach leading into the river, it seemed that they had never come to the river in the first place.

Is it a forest?

It is difficult to find footprints in the forest.

why into the woods?

did you run away?

escape?

why?

Because I keep asking you to sleep with me?

Or because he asked for a hug every time he caught his prey?

Couldn’t this life in the woods simply be unbearable?

Are you tired of life in the forest, which is virtually uninhabited on land, where all contact with the outside world is prohibited?

Did you want to take revenge on the one who hurt your family?

Couldn’t you have overcome that seething sadness and resentment just by being with me?

Why?

why? why? why? why? why? why? why? why? why? why

Sylvia’s eyes wavered like crazy.

Two red dots, flickering and swaying madly in the dark, were turning and looking around.

No, Ash can’t run away.

There’s no way Ash will leave me.

Ash never leaves me

I said no

I said I’m not going anywhere

I said it’s okay to be selfish!

ah,

no way.

Ahh

was it a lie

Was it a trick to catch me off guard?

She remembered Ash, in particular, looking tired these days.

I also noticed that the number of cuts and cuts on his body was increasing.

I didn’t bother to say it because I was afraid of making Ash worry.

Could it be that he was secretly looking for a way out of the woods while I was away?

Ah ah ah ah ah.

Anxious thoughts crept in.

I was deceived.

also.

The feeling of loss that I felt at my fingertips a while ago spreads over my entire body.

I felt a sense of loss, like being thrown into the world naked again.

It was as if a huge cavity had formed in my heart.

Not a wound, but a joint.

An emptiness, not pain, pierced her heart.

As if the wind was leaking into that empty space, her heart grew cold.

It was a familiar feeling to her, but strangely, it was several times more painful.

If it had been pierced from the start, he would have adapted, but when the hole he had barely blocked was pierced again and started to leak, his emotions flooded with helplessness.

She sighed in a voice as low as emotion.

“…ash.”

run away?

why?

If you didn’t like it that much, you shouldn’t have said it.

You should have said no.

why did you tail like that?

who?

you hit

While you’re sniffing, huh?

He said that it was good to eat deliciously, that it was good to save him, and that it was good to hug him as much as he wanted.

Where have you been?

Sylvia went back to the cabin and went to her room.

Of course, I had no intention of letting Ash go.

The curse was the kind that should not be released into the world.

Sylvia took out a large object wrapped in cloth from under her bed.

Then, slowly unwind the cloth.

“I made it clear…”

slippery,

A long piece of cloth was slowly falling under Sylvia’s feet.

“I can’t go anywhere now.”

As the long cloth, nearly five meters long, fell to the floor, she held a large longsword in a leather scabbard in her hand.

“I can’t go out, I won’t let you leave.”

Sylvia spread her fingers wide apart, pressed the sword grip between her thumb and forefinger, and then slowly wrapped it tightly.

After firmly gripping the handle, I slowly peeled off the leather scabbard with my other hand, revealing my presence as the sharp blue blade reflected all the faint light in the dark room.

One of the finest swords forged by the best blacksmith in the kingdom.

Still, its sharp blade, which seemed to cut even just by touching it, reappeared completely in the air for the first time in several years.

It is the sword that cut down countless monsters and demon kings, and the sword of Sylvia that slaughtered all the innocent villagers of Millwood.

From the blood of an innocent child to the blood of an evil snake king, the sword could hardly be called a demonic sword, given its accumulated history.

And, befitting its history, the sword was emitting an ugly and ominous energy.

“no way. Called.”

Sylvia recalled Ash’s body odor and chanted a short spell.

As she finished her spell, a pale red trail rose faintly in the air.

The trail led out of the cabin door and into the woods Ash had entered.

Sylvia put her sword back in its scabbard, put it around her waist, and left the cabin in pursuit of Ash’s trail.

“I shouldn’t have fixed the leg.”

.