chapter 17
17 – 17. Beginning
Sometimes, when you hear something too absurd, accidents come to a halt.
For Princess 1 Victoria, this was one of those moments.
“Are you stupid, sister?”
A madman suddenly barged into her office and spewed curses.
It was, of course, an unprecedented experience. Victoria wore a black military uniform and a triangular hat due to her military status, but her actual stature was more than just a mere lieutenant.
Rather, excluding the Emperor, she was the most revered presence in the Empire. No one could treat Victoria lightly.
“Did I hear wrong?”
At that moment, an uninvited guest, elegantly dressed, spat out another curse, as if to confirm that it wasn’t a misunderstanding.
“I asked, are you stupid?”
“Anais!”
Victoria had to admit the fact that she ended up being scolded by her younger sister.
However, the absurdity didn’t disappear. Rather than Siena doing such a thing, it was not Siena who was confronting her now, but her youngest sister Anais.
A child who had always been kind and pure since childhood.
Victoria, too, was quite fond of her.
Just a month ago, she even gave advice on matters of the heart. Wasn’t there a senior at the academy who slightly caught her attention?
The vivid image of her happily giving advice was still fresh in her memory, but now she was spouting curses. Rather than anger, it was more of a restrained resentment.
“Even just looking at your eyes, it’s clear you’re not in a good state.”
The eyes that were compared to obsidian were already clouded, and the face that always had a smile now only retained venom.
“I wish you’d tell me why I’m considered stupid. Is it because of Baron Soyon?”
“…That person is trying hard to impress you in front of the family lately.”
“It might be disappointing that the nobles who supported you are constantly defecting, but I didn’t capture him. As you know, I’m not particularly interested in creating factions. Only the distant relatives are helping with administrative matters.”
“That doesn’t really matter. It’s because of the morphine.”
“Is it just because that bothered you?”
The medicine called morphine, which she had reluctantly received at the military hospital the day before for the sake of being considerate.
Alan Maydoff had shown such insincere enthusiasm that Victoria had only agreed to his request out of politeness. It was pleasing to see him wrap himself around Siena like that.
“In the end, is it because it benefits Siena that he’s feeling frustrated? There must be some conflict between them.”
Victoria sighed, thinking that she should calm Anais down.
Swearing was unpleasant, but she could overlook it once. After all, Anais was only seven years old, too young to be involved in such matters.
“Anais, it’s not something extraordinary. It’s just op*ium.”
“Just op*ium?”
“Yes, it’s op*ium. The administration started yesterday… and from what I found out, its effectiveness is just average.”
“Average…? The hospital probably sugarcoated it a bit, fearing that you might disapprove of a substance brought by Siena’s confidant. In my opinion, it’s almost certain…! It’s not just at the level of op*ium.”
“……”
“I’ve blocked almost all hospitals that tried to introduce morphine, and you ruined it. There’s no turning back now.”
Anais closed her eyes as if she had been confident but proven wrong.
Victoria found it strange that her usually dejected sister was acting this way.
To try to prevent the introduction of morphine… Wasn’t it strange to pressure and interfere when no one would accept it anyway?
“You’re being too sensitive.”
“Sensitive…? It’s actually you who’s being careless! Look at thalidomide, for example. At first, I thought it was just a peculiar mushroom. Herbalists tried to extract similar species but couldn’t find any. They ended up killing several people during the experiments.”
“Wait, people died?”
“That’s not important right now!”
Anais started biting her nails, wondering what to do.
Victoria finally felt uneasy as well.
Come to think of it, didn’t Siena treat Empress Yeonhwa, who had been confined to her bed, and make her (excessively) lively again? Lately, she had been overflowing with energy. It’s not like Siena suddenly acquired knowledge of medicine, so there must be another secret behind it.
However, even so.
“Even if what you say, Anais, is correct, there’s no need to get upset.”
“Me…?”
“The appropriate treatment for PTSD is the most crucial factor in maintaining morale. If it’s an effective medication, you just have to pay the right price and take it.”
“No, not now…! Ugh, forget it.”
Watching her disappointed younger sibling, Victoria just looked at her pitifully.
The thought that it was an exaggerated reaction still hadn’t changed.
**
Morphine is a god.
For Sergeant ‘Malik,’ who has been bedridden in the military hospital for a month, it was an unspoken truth.
Perhaps he didn’t realize he said it out loud. It didn’t matter anyway. They won’t come looking for him in the pulpit just because he praised morphine a bit.
He belonged to the Royal 3rd Artillery Battalion.
After enlisting because there was nowhere else to go, he had been leading a relatively satisfactory military life, but a month ago, he had an accident.
An explosion accident during artillery training.
Two soldiers died, and Malik barely managed to survive alone.
He wasn’t completely unscathed. Shrapnel stuck in his side, and his arm was severely injured, requiring amputation. Thanks to a messenger who rushed at the officer’s request, the amputation surgery was quickly completed.
Since then, a month of continued hospitalization.
The pain in the injured area was what tormented Malik the most. It was so painful that sometimes he wanted to pass out. He could hardly sleep.
What saved Malik from that suffering was none other than morphine.
‘Isn’t it about time?’
The medication time was 12 o’clock.
I’ve checked the time several times anxiously. Restlessness crossed Malik’s face.
When I checked earlier, it was 11:40, so it must be close to 12 o’clock now, right?
No, if it’s 12 o’clock, it must have already started. Then is it 11:50? I’ve been waiting for so long, and it’s only 50 minutes. It must have been at least 55 minutes. So if I wait for just 5 more minutes, it should be fine. But what if it’s not 55 minutes, but 54 or 53 minutes?
‘Instead of thinking like this, let’s just ask.’
Coincidentally, a nurse was passing by in front of him.
“Excuse me, is it now…?”
“45 minutes.”
“Still 15 minutes left…?”
Disappointment appeared on Malik’s face.
15 minutes.
Should I read a book during that time? I do have a coloring book to pass the time, but I can only see the pictures clearly after taking morphine. Before that, it was just a jumble of poorly printed characters.
‘Then what should I do to endure?’
As Malik swallowed his saliva repeatedly and anxiously looked around,
His colleague, who was using the bed next to him, raised an eyebrow and looked at Malik. He was the guy whose knees gave way when he spoke.
“Can’t you even wait for just 15 minutes?”
“Why are you suddenly picking a fight?”
“I’m not picking a fight. I’m asking you to think about how we lived before taking morphine. Don’t you remember… or rather, do you remember how we survived back then? Compared to that, we’re living a decent life now.”
“Ah.”
After listening, it made sense.
Malik and the patients in the same ward had only started using morphine two days ago.
Before morphine, they had simply relied on op*ium. They would drink op*ium juice several times a day.
At its worst, they would take 2 grams of op*ium at once, and at its worst, 3 grams.
At most, they would consume a total of 20 grams of op*ium in a day, but it didn’t really help manage the pain. That’s why the dosage increased as the days went by, and at some point, the stomach couldn’t bear it anymore.
But the effects of morphine were on a different level.
“They said it’s 15 milligrams at once. It’s unbelievable, really.”
In reality, it was just like a powder? Just melting a small amount in strangely salty water made the pain disappear as if it were a lie.
The pain from the shrapnel in the side, the pain felt from the severed left arm, and even the pain from the spine that had started to become stiff due to the hospital bed, all disappeared as if it were a lie. Even the despair that came with the pain was taken away.
“Malik, was that what we were living for back then?”
“Not at all.”
“Crying out in pain from morning till night, groaning about wanting to die all night, wasn’t that our daily life? …We were all disabled anyway, but seeing them killing and cursing each other made me want to die too.”
“That’s true.”
“Compared to back then, this is heaven. Let’s endure it.”
Those were the right words. They had endured a month of nightmare, so couldn’t they endure those 15 minutes?
They had passed the time talking with their colleagues, so they were really close. The nurses would soon come with the morphine and kindly distribute it to the patients.
Malik waited, keeping his mouth shut, only waiting for noon to come.
9 minutes left.
“Hoo, hoo.”
6 minutes.
“They’re coming…! Ah, no, they’re not.”
3 minutes. Now, my breath was truly caught.
And finally.
“It’s time for medication.”
The nurse’s dreamlike voice echoed in my ears.
Along with it, sighs of relief bursting from every bed in the vicinity, the sound of clapping hands, and soft laughter.
Malik, too, wasn’t any different, recalling a bright smile. If he had two arms, he would have probably applauded.
‘Waiting was worthwhile.’
Now, Malik couldn’t imagine a life without morphine. There was no need to imagine. If there were thoughts in the military hospital, there was no reason not to use such a good medicine. People love it so much; there’s no way it should be cut off.
Malik became devout and waited for his turn.
He even corrected his posture with an uncomfortable body. Just the thought of welcoming Mr. Morphine made his heart flutter.
In Malik’s excited ears, a strange sound was heard.
“The medicine received as a sample is all gone. What should I do?”
“Quiet, you idiot…! Patients can hear.”
The nurses’ suspicious conversation. Malik’s expression gradually became serious.
If he misheard, that would be great, but looking around, other patients had similar expressions. The conspicuous behavior of the nurses who visibly cringed raised suspicions.
“The medicine is all gone…?”
It didn’t take long for unrest to spread through the ward.