ALL NOVEL Chapter 10.3 - Sometimes, running away is the best answer.
“Oh, it’s not like that!”
“Or maybe it is.”
Theodore’s questions were getting annoying. No, why is he asking so many questions? He’s never been this way before!
“……Have you grown to hate me?”
“Huh? Not at all!”
“Of course not. Why would I hate……”
Just as I’m about to give in to the kid’s barrage of misunderstood questions:.
“What are you two doing?”
Jeffrey, who was arriving for work just in time, squeezed between us. He was dressed in a neat robe, holding a cup of coffee in one hand and yawning sleepily. Nice, Jeffrey!
“I’m in a hurry, I’ll go first, you two have work to do! Oh, and you’re on your own for lunch!”
And with that, I rushed up the stairs, leaving Theodore behind. I almost got misunderstood… Ah!
Did he think I wanted to end our relationship?
No. I don’t think the Tower Master would allow it in the first place.
I was just trying to avoid being caught turning in the papers too late. It’s too… I don’t want to look like a teacher who doesn’t care about his pupils.
As I calmly walked up the stairs one by one, I was reminded of what I had forgotten during our conversation earlier. My nervousness quickly subsided.
Over the course of ten days, I realized… Dante didn’t belong in the Tower of Light. He wasn’t supposed to be here.
Being a failing research mage was just a cover. He had talent, it was just that he channeled it in a bad way.
‘The moment the basement lab is discovered, I’ll be immediately accused of heresy and condemned…’
My spine chilled at the clearly visible future. Accepting it and deciding to somehow get through it wasn’t supposed to be like this. This kind of thing… I really didn’t want to seek forgiveness for.
‘……I don’t know.’
It seemed like I hadn’t solved anything, but just snowballed into an irreparable mess.
‘I just… I thought that if I reconciled with Theodore, I would be able to make a life for myself afterwards…’
That was my arrogance, fueled by ignorance. I sighed heavily, and it too dissipated into thin air.
Without leaving a trace.
***
Nevertheless, I put all my energy into finding a solution that might exist somewhere. And finally, I found one.
[Study No. 8882: Recreating the Physical Body].Research Results: Failure.
Notes: As I continued to search for a vessel to increase the amount of mana, another possibility occurred to me.
What if instead of searching for a vessel, I create one? The experiment failed, but it seems worthy of further study. To be followed up.
As usual, I descended into the basement lab at dawn and sat with my back against the bookshelf, flipping through the stacks. The study numbers were already approaching eight thousand.
”Recreating the Physical Body…..”
I flipped through a nearby book to find the next page. It said ”to be followed up,” but it didn’t look like it had been done. Suddenly, I realized I was nearing the end of this paper.
Suddenly, I remembered a conversation I had with Jeffrey some time ago.
‘I was just running away to this place.’
‘……Don’t say such things.’
‘That’s what everyone says. …which isn’t wrong.’
‘……’
One day, without Theodore, the two of us had a quick lunch and a walk to digest it. Jeffrey brought up the subject quite easily, a topic he’d never once considered bringing up, perhaps because it was painful for him.
He tilted his head slightly, looked off into space, and muttered.
‘I thought I was going to die if I stayed in there.’
‘Was it that bad?’
“Yeah…. I felt both miserable at my damned fate and wanted to resist it, you know? I mean, it’s my dad’s fault for not being able to keep his pants on…. and now I have to fight with my sibling over it, it sucks.’
‘……’
I had heard of it before. About the fighting within the imperial family.
I had no interest in politics, but there were a few things I couldn’t help but learn when I took Jeffrey under my wing.
That the Emperor had two wives, and that there was a power struggle between them, and that the man called the Emperor, instead of stopping it, had encouraged it, and furthermore, it had become a power struggle for the throne.
“I… I want my older sister to win.
‘……’
‘I could see that I was an obstacle to her. So I just… I don’t want to be a burden.’
The look on Jeffrey’s face when he added that was like he was holding in a lot of sadness. I quietly patted him on the shoulder.
Jeffrey stuffed his ice cream into his mouth and acted casual.
‘I don’t regret it.’
‘Oh…?’
‘Because I felt like I was going to suffocate to death every day I was there. Having no power, and knowing I had nothing… Not knowing when I might be assassinated……’
‘……’
‘But I tried to hold on, it was still my home, but my nanny told this to me.’
‘… Tell you what?’
The child replied, smiling brightly.
‘That sometimes running away is the best answer.’
At that point, I realized that Jeffrey was speaking in past tense, but I didn’t press him further.
“……Why did I remember this now…”
Maybe it’s reminding me because…
Actually, I knew. I knew, but it was such a cowardly thing to do that I couldn’t do it. One that I thought was not an option because it was never going to work. Now, I…
I want to run away……
***
I succeeded in following up on study number 8882.
The one magic research that consumed my months of early mornings was now in my hands, and it also happened to be one of the few days my kids were away.
It was the beginning of the story.
Jeffrey and Theodore had been busy preparing for their ceremony since morning. I could only watch them in awe as they bustled around in a frenzy of activity. Probably the last time I’ll ever get to see them like this.
It’s a joyous day. A day that should be filled with joy for them and me… But my expression showed no sign of softening. I still hadn’t made a decision. Even after all my research.
Theodore, who was now standing close by, gently touched my forehead.
“You’ve been up all night again.”
“Oh, I didn’t…”
“You have to open your eyes before you lie to me so I can decide whether to believe you or not.”
“You…”
I’m still your master, that’s not how you should be speaking…
I pouted once and then slumped back against the desk, face down. Despite this, things have really come a long way between me and Theodore in recent months.
We’ve gotten along better, we’ve eaten together, we’ve worked out together, and we even argued about things like this……
It sucked, and I ended up feeling sorry for myself.
‘I am leaving this place today.’
I didn’t say anything to Theodore. It was like I had already made up my mind like I couldn’t think of a better gift. It was funny. My first gift as a master was to disappear.
I quickly changed the subject and asked Theodore, in case the mood turned sour again.
“What time do you leave for the ceremony?”
“Four o’clock, in about… 30 minutes.”
“It’s better to go early than late.”
Theodore nodded as if I had a point. With that, the three of us left the study. I followed quietly behind them.
“Take care.”
I said as I stood by the stairs to the second floor and waved. The two of them walked toward the main lobby of the tower. I thought that this was how we would part ways, but then Theodore came back and stood right in front of me. As if there was something he wanted to say.
“Why? Did you leave something behind…”
“…When I get back.”
There is something I have to tell you.
Theodore said so in a serious voice. His gaze was angled down, and I couldn’t guess the meaning behind it.
Not that he wanted to say something, but something he has to say.
“So I’ll let you work overtime today.”
“……Only when it is convenient to do so.”
“You know, you sound a lot like the real Master.”
Isn’t that right?
Theodore flashes me a smile in agreement, but I turn my head away as if I were a schoolgirl.
If I didn’t, I’d give away my rumbling heart.
“Go now.”
Despite the bluntness of my words, my eyes continued to follow Theodore. Until the moment he descended to the ground floor and exited the tower.
With everyone else gone, the familiar silence descended upon the tower.
And then, without the boy in front of me, I said the words I couldn’t say.
“……I’m sorry.”
I don’t think I’ll ever hear what you had to say, ever.