I’m Not That Villain

17 – The First Guest (3)

The room was, well…

In a word, filthy.

“Pl-please come in…”

She led me inside, but I couldn’t quite tell what made this place different from the outside.

Not only were there piles of junk, but there was also a heap of recycling trash in one corner, as if it hadn’t been properly cleaned. The floor was covered in hair, and instant food wrappers were scattered around.

Is this a dump or a place where people live?

I glanced at the clothes strewn about. They were all stretched out. It must have been hard to find clothes that fit her body shape. No matter how big the clothes she bought, they were clearly not enough.

Could it be that the hoodie she’s wearing now…

Isn’t custom-made, but just a large piece of clothing stretched to fit?

She hurriedly pushed the trash to one side. I glanced back at the front door, which was about to close.

My phone alarm went off.

A brief warning.

[Do not close the front door. If it closes, they will enter immediately.]

I wedged a piece of trash between the door. It looked closed at a glance, but this way, it wasn’t.

I followed her inside. She, embarrassed, offered me a seat.

“Would you like something to drink?”

The refrigerator opened.

Inside, there was nothing but beer.

“…….”

“…….”

She quietly closed the refrigerator again. I could smell the rotting food inside.

“…Are you eating properly?”

“Of course…! It’s just that… I don’t clean often…”

I glanced at the unusually fluffy hair. I gestured to her with my hand.

“And so?”

“Yes?”

“Blood collection. You would have followed me if you could.”

She hesitated and nodded. She groaned as if trying to muster strength.

“J-just a moment… W-why isn’t this working…?”

I waited for a few minutes, but there was no significant change in her body.

First, I lightly swept the trash into one place so I could sit down. I pressed down the overflowing trash can.

Once there was enough space, I sat down. I looked at her and asked questions one by one.

“That ability, can’t you release it at will?”

“N-no… that’s not it…”

“Then?”

“It works at home. But strangely, not now…”

An ability that only responds to specific places.

Of course, it exists. I’ve heard of such things. There are mountains of papers on it.

But the woman in front of me didn’t seem to be such a case. To clear my doubts, I asked the remaining questions one by one.

“It doesn’t seem like it only responds to specific places… Can you only release it at ‘home’ and nowhere else?”

“Usually… yes.”

“But now it doesn’t work.”

If there’s a variable, it’s one.

My presence.

“It’s a psychological issue. The trigger is probably a ‘comfortable place.’ Since you’re tense, the ability isn’t working. Such cases are relatively common.”

“Y-yes?”

“Calm down. I don’t intend to criticize your home. After all, I’ve lived a similar life. But this place is… quite dirty.”

Maybe it’s because the interior is dark.

I couldn’t see well, so I took off my sunglasses. Taking them off didn’t change anything. I was still wearing my mask and hat properly.

Whether it’s a comfortable place or reducing tension, it was a problem that could be solved by addressing the same issue.

I looked up at the stiff, giant werewolf. To ease the tension, it’s good to find common ground.

“But my house was often dirty too.”

I casually brought up the topic. I muttered as if talking to myself.

“When you’re busy, you have no choice but to postpone cleaning. That’s how it was for me. Even if I wanted to, I didn’t have the time.”

“…….”

“But you don’t seem like that. Do you just not like cleaning?”

“Th…that’s not it.”

I managed to open the conversation. She stammered as she spoke.

“It’s just… even if I try… I can’t find the motivation…”

“Motivation?”

“I, I’ve never really finished anything before. I’m just… hopeless… Ahaha… Maybe it’s because I’m a girl without parents…”

Self-deprecating.

No one said anything, yet she flaunts her shortcomings with her own mouth.

I wasn’t a psychologist. But at least I could tell she wasn’t normal.

“A girl without parents.”

“…….”

“Me neither.”

“…Why?”

“My family tried to commit suicide together, but they failed, and I was the only one who survived.”

Her eyes widened. Her wolf-like eyes became clear.

Her body leaned forward slightly.

“…When?”

“When I was in elementary school.”

“…So you’ve been alone since then?”

“That’s right. Because I wanted to live.”

Even though I can talk about it casually now, honestly, it’s not a story to bring up lightly.

But she reacted to it. That was important.

“…That wasn’t the case for me. But… my only mom ran away. Abandoned me.”

“Why?”

“…Just… because. There was a man, and I guess I was in the way. She disappeared in the night. Of course, she had been subtly hinting at it before.”

She fidgeted with her hands.

“Yewon can manage on her own… she said.”

“…….”

“…Well… in a way, it’s understandable. I was just a kid who couldn’t even take care of herself properly, right? In a place like this, in times like these, I’ve heard it’s common to be abandoned. The church pastor said so. It’s common, so just grow up strong and proud.”

“When were you abandoned?”

“…Around the same time… Elementary school.”

“School?”

She scratched her cheek.

“Thanks to my teacher, I got into middle school, but I couldn’t go any further. All the high schools in Seoul are private… And I guess I just lived doing this and that.”

“This and that?”

“Cleaning, washing dishes… things like that. Oh, but I didn’t sell my body. I didn’t want to become like my mom.”

“…Like your mom?”

“My mom was that kind of person. A… prostitute? So, in elementary school, my nickname was ‘prostitute’s daughter.'”

What a tumultuous life.

I could see her forcing a smile.

“For an elementary school nickname, it’s a bit… right?”

“I can’t say it’s not.”

“…But it was okay. At least I had someone with me back then…”

She suddenly lifted her head and raised her voice.

“You know, this ability, it’s really not helpful at all.”

“Why?”

“It’s been exactly a year since I awakened it. But no one will hire me. The only thing I can do is manual labor to barely make ends meet… But even there, they don’t hire me anymore. What’s wrong with being a furry? Right? It’s just cute… But everyone calls me a monster. I can’t fit in anywhere… Hmm… No, maybe I never fit in to begin with…?”

As her tone gradually became more relaxed, I quietly listened to her words.

As more words poured out than questions, I could see changes happening to her body.

Her size gradually decreased. Her fur receded.

She whimpered as if she hadn’t noticed the changes.

“But it’s not all uncomfortable. When I’m like this… I can talk to people.”

“Does that mean you can’t talk in your usual state?”

“…I have social anxiety. But when I’m covered in fur like this, I can at least… seem like a normal person…?”

Her voice trembled as she finally noticed the changes.

Her clothes, now completely loose. She had fully returned to her human form from her beast form and hurriedly curled up.

She had reverted. Completely. The switch for the transformation seemed to be tension…

Fortunately, once she reverted, it seemed to take some time to return to her original state. The fact that she remained completely frozen and didn’t return to her beast form was evidence of that.

“Uh… uh…”

“Your arm.”

I lifted the blood collection device I had prepared as a spare. I took blood from her stammering arm.

Hmm. Good. This time it definitely went in. That’s a relief. If it had been the same reaction this time, I would have lost fifty thousand won.

She completely froze and avoided my eyes. I didn’t stare at her face or do anything like that. In the first place, it was hard to see because she was covering it with her hood and her remaining hand.

I roughly understood her condition. I also grasped the story to some extent.

The reason she doesn’t clean, the reason she doesn’t have any motivation for anything…

It’s probably because of what she went through.

Severe depression. I guess that’s how you could describe it.

I had experienced it once too. It was right after a failed double suicide attempt.

Fortunately, I overcame it. But what about her? It’s a pain only those who have been through it know.

Physically, she looks completely fine on the outside, but inside, she’s all messed up…

It’s a crappy feeling. Really.

I put the blood collection device back into its case after finishing the blood draw. But I didn’t leave right away.

“Do you have any extra garbage bags at home?”

“…What?”

I rolled up my sleeves towards her, who had completely hidden her face with a loose hood.

Let’s think of it as a service. At least for me. I cleaned because I wanted to live. Because…

Just cleaning up makes you feel a bit better. The environment is important. If you live in a trash can, you feel like trash yourself.

Even if it’s not the pain of shared suffering… I was somewhat concerned.

Besides…

If you’re a person, isn’t it normal to want to help when you see something like this?

“If you don’t have any, I’ll go buy some.”

“…….?”

I tapped Seol Ye-won’s forehead, who didn’t understand and had her face covered.

“Let’s do it together. Clean up.”

It’s a special service for the first customer.

Let’s just say it’s something like that.