Intelligent Design: A Monster Evolution LitRPG

A thick silvery haze glittered prettily in the center of the room, a light coating of dusk powder beginning to build upon Herold’s carapace as the world held its breath. Literally, in most cases, everyone heeded Claire’s bellowed warning like it was the word of God they scrambled away from the center of the room. David quickly righted himself in the air and darted back to the makeshift arena, landing close to Herold as he watched the powder continue to coat the enormous insect as it sank toward the ground with increasing speed the longer it was airborne, the particles heavier than air by design.

Shit, fuck, crap, balls, no no, nooooooo, no. Oh that's not good, please don't get violent.

“Erm, young David, what is the nature of this ability? I trust you haven’t inflicted me with a deadly toxin or blight?” Herold called apprehensively as David joined him within the abilities radius.

David squirmed guiltily, “Uhhhh…It is a toxin but it’s not fatal! It’s a Control effect that works by uh…making the target hallucinate.”

“It functions through inhalation?” Herold followed up David's statement in a much calmer voice that made David pause slightly.

“Yes? I haven’t tested it much, only in fights.”

“All is well!” Herold boomed, “David please accompany me outside and help me remove this substance if you please. My spiracles are quite protected by my carapace. I do not believe I have inhaled an appreciable amount for my size, but I decline to remain and allow it to build.”

What the fuck is a spiracle? He isn’t affected by Gloom? Shit…I didn’t even get a notification for it, he’s right. Okay, maybe this isn’t so bad…god, I hope that wasp doesn’t get a whiff of this, do bugs just not breathe? I’m so confused.

“Clear the way! David you idiot, if I didn't think it’d make me trip balls I’d carry you around in my mouth like a puppy.”

David cringed as Claire added her two cents to the growing murmurs that followed both him and Herold outside the warehouse and onto the grass a safe distance from the door. Herold sank slowly to the ground and allowed David to hop atop his armored body to assist with removing the residual Ability from his outer shell. He stood there uncertainly, unsure how exactly to proceed as the breeze carried scents to him, mostly of water and growing things, with a fair amount of animal smells mixed in. After a few moments of wracking his exhausted brain, he came up with a simple, effective solution to his blunder.

“...I’m amazed that looks like it’s working.” Claire grumbled from her position just outside the warehouse where she stood to avoid catching any of the Gloom herself.

“Reminds me of something Thomas would do, honestly.” Betty gurgled in reply as the panther shot her a wicked side-eye.

David ignored the voices chattering from behind them as he continued to simply rub his mane across the armored plates on Herold’s back like the world's ugliest mop, his thick fur easily soaking up the heavy powder. He continued the maneuver along the beetle’s shell like a neglected cat desperate for attention until he had mostly saturated himself before hopping delicately to the ground. David scampered off into the bushes near the trees a fair distance away to shake himself violently in an explosion of silvery powder and rolling in the grass a bit to get any remainder before repeating the process two more times. Kai then declared from his position in the doorway that he could no longer see enough of the toxin to be worth worrying about and David simply flopped back down into the cool grass and lay there.

“Splendid David, thank you! I dare say I am even shinier now than I have ever been, no harm done. Perhaps we shall continue our training in the morning, outdoors?” Herold boisterously nudged him with one of his thick-clawed feet as he spoke.

“You seem awfully keen on fighting people, what’s up with that?” Claire rumbled, “Seems like a dangerous waste of time.”

Herold fell silent for a moment and his antennae almost ceased waving around happily in the darkness as David watched from his position a few feet away. Kai and Thomas visibly cringed from the doorway, and Betty excused herself so quickly that she bowled Dallas over as she fled and took most of the illumination with her. Dallas grumpily righted himself, lifting off with a droning hum, and Herold chose not to say anything as the enormous wasplike insect hovered into the air until he drew level with Claire’s head before speaking quietly.

“Because there used to be almost twenty of us with Evolutions until two days ago, but we had no experience, and we got cocky. So now we’re going to train, constantly. David made a mistake, but he’s got the right idea.” The lethal-looking wasp continued in a sedate voice, “Do you two even know how most of your abilities work? Have you even used all of them since evolving? How about while you’re trying to stop less evolved or weaker people from getting caught in the crossfire? We lost people that way too. It’s the reason Leo stopped talking, even though it wasn’t his fault.”

“And if you bring it up to him I’ll sting you, I swear to god.” Dallas added more quietly after a moment's thought before zipping over to land atop Herold and tapping on his shell comfortingly.

Claire’s jaw had fallen at the bluntness with which the wasp had delivered his diatribe, obviously unaccustomed to even a gentle ass chewing. She swung her massive head in David’s direction, flabbergasted, and he simply nodded to confirm that he’d heard what the man had said despite it being spoken quietly and nearly inaudible over the sound of his wings. Claire took a few steps to close the gap and lowered her snout to gently nudge the enormous beetle on the side by way of apology.

“Sorry…we’ve obviously had very different experiences since hatching. It’s just been David and me, we haven’t had to deal with the same type of problems, I hadn’t even considered…”

“No, no. I erred as well, you had warned me your companion was unfit to spar with but…well…I do take this quite seriously these days. Perhaps to my detriment, hah! Come, let us return inside. Wendy should be back soon, it won't do to ruin the surprise of your arrival by having you out on the lawn like tacky plastic flamingos!”

David fluttered up to land on Claire’s back as Herold bustled past them inside, Dallas still standing atop his shell and buzzing his wings every few seconds grumpily when they vanished through the door. Kai motioned for them to join with his wing before turning to follow them, vanishing quickly as he turned to make room for Claire to fit through the door.

“I feel like a total douche.” Claire rumbled slowly as David poked his head out from around her neck to meet her gaze.

He shook his head blearily in denial as he replied, “They seem nice, I think we’ll be okay. Doesn’t seem like a weird cult or anything, they’re just doing the best they can, same as we were. I think they have a point too, I don’t know exactly how Gloom works. I don’t know how far Screech will hit people anymore, and I’m not even sure how much health I drain when I hit someone! I feel like we’ve just been getting lucky.”

“I can’t exactly spar with anyone…”

“Tell that to the turtle in there, I’m pretty sure he’d be able to give you a run for your money. Herold too, those plates are thick Claire, and we heal like mutants or something. Those Slitherwolves destroyed my leg and it was fine in like an hour. We’ve got no idea what we’re doing. If they aren’t lying and they…lost…six evolved people that means we could get smoked too.” David paused, “Well maybe not you, you’re too fat to die.”

Claire snorted explosively, a single barking laugh of surprise booming through the darkness, “Hah! Just when I was gonna say you were sounding smart again for a second! That doesn’t happen very often, and you had to go and ruin it.”

“I’m too tired to be stupid right now, I say we stick around for a little while. Maybe we don’t sign up for the whole tour of duty but we could stay for a few days and 'train', see if there’s anything else we’ve been completely overlooking.” David yawned hugely and flopped down between her shoulder blades like a sack of flour, “Wake me up when whoever Wendy is gets here? They looked cool from like five miles away but I’m curious what they look like up close.”

Claire crouched a bit as she maneuvered her armored bulk through the loading door and shook her head.

“Go to bed stupid, you can go back to fighting random strangers tomorrow.”

Yeah, that sounds fun. Why didn’t Kai say anything about them having more people before? What the fuck happened two days ago?

David curled up into a ball on Claire’s broad back and was asleep before she had rejoined the rest of the group inside.