Is This a Novel or Something?…Everyone and Their Dog is Regressing, It’s Fking Ridiculous

Chapter 29



The group of Chinese people grows distant.

Even though they were initially bad Chinese who committed the evil act of voice phishing, what are they now?

Haven’t they become good Chinese who love peace before we knew it?

Moreover, there’s no need for aftercare.

From now on, public security will make them even kinder.

It’s truly the principle of treating the enemy with the enemy (以夷伐夷).

[You really hate China that much, huh?]

“Hate? No way! I actually like China a lot.”

When it comes to my preferences about China, I lean more towards liking it.

So every night before bed, I pray.

I hope there are more things about China I can like.

Roughly, I think having five emperors and sixteen nations would be enough.

Anyway, since work is done, I was planning to grab some lunch.

However.

“Can we just order the four-person set? We’re on a budget, so that’s cheaper for us.”

“Sure, go ahead.”

That’s what the staff said; they can only order the four-person set.

So while thinking about who to call, I naturally summoned Kyoukyou.

As I was eating and briefly talking about what happened in the morning, Kyoukyou suddenly started complaining.

“Why am I the only one being bullied!! It’s Korea, so why is there bullying!!!”

“Kekeke. Bullying isn’t just a Japanese culture.”

“That’s dangerous, so it could be.”

Jeong Ahyeon scolded Kyoukyou.

However, Kyoukyou didn’t seem to have any intention of backing down.

“But still not allowed!! If I want to go to art school, I need to see more art!!!”

“I mean, what does art have to do with catching those damn Chinese?”

“I realized after seeing Hyeji-chan!!!! Explosion is art!!!”

“Oh my, Kyoukyou. You finally realized!”

Hyeji put down her food and hugged Kyoukyou with an overflowing expression of joy.

Kyoukyou, grinning from being hugged by Hyeji, reopened her mouth.

“I’m going to art school and do even fancier art than Hyeji-chan!!!”

“Shit, I thought you were a dictator but you’re a Daedara instead.”

“Then from today onwards, we’re rivals in goodwill. Please take care, Kyoukyou.”

“I’ll show a bigger explosion than Little Boy or Fat Man!!!!!!”

“Yeah, Kyoukyou. I won’t lose either. I’m looking forward to it.”

Suddenly, Hyeji and Kyoukyou stopped eating and shook hands.

If someone who didn’t know saw this, it would be a delightful scene, but in our eyes, it looked like two crazy girls plotting something.

“Is it really necessary for such a huge explosion?”

“I wanted to explode this rotten world!!!”

“Don’t write lines here that sound like something a bread-baking old man would say.”

“……Are we witnessing the start of World War III right now?”

I was mistaken.

I intended to express Kyoukyou as just a dictator.

She was far more than that.

“Bravo, Kyoukyou. Destroy the world with your own hands.”

[At this point, you should just change Kyoukyou’s name to Kim Kyoukyou.]

After finishing our meal, we suddenly followed Kyoukyou’s guidance.

Where we ended up was the conveniences within the academy.

“There’s a lot to play here, www. I envy the academy students, www.”

The convenience facilities had all sorts of equipment.

An arcade. A park. Various shops.

Truly, the facilities were grand for anyone to see.

Of course, the number of users was limited.

A few academy students and a majority of trainee students.

It makes sense, though.

“Shinwoo, did you know there was a place like this?”

“I just found out too.”

“……Is this really a place for students?”

We had no idea about this place’s existence.

It surely was a good place.

Most of the facilities were free or charged only a small amount; anyone would agree it was generous.

No, it might even be seen as a deficit.

While pondering why we weren’t informed of this, a voice echoed in my head.

[They probably didn’t tell because too many students would cause a deficit.]

“Damn, this academy is really idiotic.”

They only regarded students as research students or candidates for dog fighting.

Damn academy.

Road Taylor Kim Shinwoo will chew you up, you bastards.

Anyway, as this was my first time here, I was excited and started to play around.

Of course, it wasn’t smooth sailing.

“Hyeji, calm down!!! It’s just play!!!”

“I’m a girl, you bitch!!!!”

“Got it, please calm down!”

Hyeji was throwing a tantrum attacking the punch machine.

It seemed she was upset that her score was low.

“This is my strength! Just one more!! I’ll blow it up gently!! Let’s do it once!!”

“Hyeji, stop acting like a kid. I’m really disappointed.”

“……I might have gone too far? I’m sorry.”

Hyeji drooped her head at my words.

At that moment, Jeong Ahyeon, who was trying to stop Hyeji, sighed in relief.

But.

“As an adult, you need to at least use two.”

“Just as expected from the leader. I knew I could count on you!!”

“Master!!!! Please don’t encourage her!!”

“Hyeji-chan!! I’m a minor, so let’s just make one!!”

That relief didn’t last long, though.

Of course, Jeong Ahyeon wasn’t exactly calm either.

This time, it was Hyeji trying to talk down Jeong Ahyeon.

“How dare you toy with me? It’s ridiculous. I’ll definitely make you pay!!”

“Hey! You were normal when you were trying to stop me! Why are you suddenly insane!!”

“Step back, fellow! Even if it’s a machine, you must pay the price.”

What angered Jeong Ahyeon was the claw machine.

We all got what we wanted, but it seemed she couldn’t catch any, making her grumble with resentment.

“Missing the things I caught! This needs to be punished.”

“You were eyeshining beforehand, right!! Shinwoo, help her out!”

“Just as the Master would say.”

“Nise Martial Artist!!! Please fetch a Japanese Empire’s cannon camera too!!!”

In the end, we got caught by the staff and ended up submitting a letter of explanation.

The reason was property damage and theft.

At least it was fortunate that trainee student Kyoukyou only got scolded a little.

“Damn, if I knew this would happen, I would have broken something.”

“I agree. Should’ve just cleaned everything out.”

“These guys have a different mindset.”

Feeling wronged, Hyeji and Jeong Ahyeon sharpened their teeth as they returned.

Though it was a bit rough, we played relatively calmly compared to earlier.

Of course.

“This is really weak! It’s already broken!”

“Can’t even hold up against this?”

Thanks to Hyeji, levers and buttons broke.

And a few machines malfunctioned because of Jeong Ahyeon.

But still, it was a day well spent.

*

The next evening.

We were sending off the trainee students returning to their home country.

Before they boarded the bus, Kyoukyou came over to say her final goodbyes.

“Hyeji-chan! Shinwoo-chan! See you again, desu wwwww.”

“……Don’t leave me out.”

“The name Nise Martial Artist is hard, desu wwwww.”

Kyoukyou laughed heartily, while Jeong Ahyeon held her head.

I grabbed Kyoukyou’s shoulder and gave her serious advice.

“You saw what happened to my coin, right? Don’t double down.”

“Oh! Blue was on Shinwoo-chan’s phone, wwwwwww.”

“Yeah, damn. Sanji will be coming soon.”

Kyoukyou turned her back and boarded the bus.

Leaning out of the window, she waved goodbye.

“Kyoukyou, see you next time! I’ll keep in touch a lot!”

“Next time, let’s meet somewhere other than this idiotic academy.”

“Heh! If I come next time, I’ll really show the terror of a martial artist.”

“Thank you, www. See you again, www.”

We also waved back at Kyoukyou, chiming in our farewells.

With that, the bus grew distant, becoming a small dot before disappearing from sight.

It was farewell.

As Kyoukyou’s figure faded away, we halted our waving hands.

At that moment, Hyeji approached me sneakily and spoke.

“Still, Shinwoo, you did end up getting the cannon camera, didn’t you?”

“Damn, it ended up costing way more than its actual price.”

“Master, why did you do that?”

“Oh, I thought it’d work this time.”

I definitely caught it, but in the end, the machine forced its arms open, which was excessive.

Then came Hyeji’s look of disbelief.

“Didn’t you just get through that gacha and spend beyond the ceiling?”

“Damn shit game, for real. That rat keeps showing up.”

“……Can you return the emotional parting I just felt?”

Anyway, we sent off Kyoukyou too.

Since we had no more purpose, we decided to part ways.

Then suddenly, I remembered something I needed to tell Hyeji and grabbed her.

“Shinwoo, why?”

“Hyeji, I have something to say.”

“What is it?”

Hyeji tilted her head in curiosity.

“I’d like to talk one-on-one. Shall we move to another place?”

“U-uh!! Where should we go?”

“Just follow me for a second.”

Hyeji’s expression changed suddenly.

She looked as if she was expecting something.

I led Hyeji to the empty sparring ground.

Without saying a word, she followed me, and once we arrived at the destination, Hyeji quietly opened her mouth.

“Shinwoo? Can I know what you want to say?”

“Well, actually I…”

“Uh-huh, I can wait as long as you need until you talk.”

Hyeji’s face was slightly flushed.

Seeing Hyeji’s face, which looked like she was expecting something, I whispered softly.

“…I think I awakened my ability.”

“……Huh?”

Suddenly, Hyeji’s eyes darkened rapidly.

Her expression froze into a icy glare in an instant.

“I awakened it while fighting the Ear Goblin, but I don’t know what the ability is.”

“……”

“So I wanted to ask for your help to confirm what it is.”

“……”

Hyeji silently glared at me.

Around her, a sense of pressure started to sway.

Of course, I was unaware of this and continued to talk.

“I told you first because I didn’t want to tell anyone else. You’re the only one I’m close with after all.”

“……Hey.”

“I have permission to use the sparring ground. Can you help me a bit?”

“Hey! You bastard!!!!”

Hyeji exploded.

With her rage came a tidal wave of fury.

“Hyeji? Why are you suddenly getting angry?”

“You jerk!!!! You made me expect and look at this rubbish!!!!”

“I mean, what did I say for you to get like this?”

“Damn!!!! Am I the idiot here!!!!!”

With her feet stomping and growling angrily, Hyeji looked furious.

In that moment, I remembered something else I needed to tell her.

I was really foolish.

How could I forget this?

I waved at Hyeji with a smile.

“Hyeji, why don’t you come a bit closer? I have one more thing to tell you.”

“Ughhh. Okay, this better be the real thing.”

“Just come here.”

It was getting dark now.

This was the right time.

Quickly calming her anger, Hyeji approached me.

Soon, she stood right in front of me.

With a slight smile, I pulled her closer, and she didn’t resist, surrendering her body to me.

“W-what were you trying to say by pulling me this close?”

Hyeji was now nestled in my arms.

Her face was red enough to be distinguishable even in the dark.

As I locked eyes with her, she began closing her eyes slowly.

So, I quickly pulled out the front hem of my coat and said.

“Look! It’s a glowing dinosaur!!”

“……Huh?”

I showed her the glowing dinosaur before she could fully close her eyes.

The glowing dinosaur sparkled in the dark, reflected in Hyeji’s eyes.

“Even if it’s not completely dark, can you see it well?”

“……”

“Did you know you could engrave something like this inside a defensive coat?”

“……Is that what you wanted to show me?”

Hyeji’s voice sounded somehow eerie.

“Isn’t it cool? What else should I engrave? Can you give me some suggestions?”

“Can you let go for a second?”

Hyeji was grinning.

Except for her eyes.

Her face was pale, and upon closer look, her lips seemed to be forced to rise.

As Hyeji moved away from me, she suddenly activated the sparring ground system.

“You said you wanted to figure out your powers, right?”

“That’s right! So you’ll help me?”

“Of course, of course.”

She immediately activated her powers.

It seemed she wanted to show me her abilities in action.

But.

“I’ll keep doing this until you understand, even if you don’t want to.”

“Thanks for helping me. But why does it seem like there’s quite a lot?”

The number of manifested weapons was excessively high.

No matter how I looked at it, it was not suitable for training.

Instead, it looked like she was ready to thoroughly demolish someone.

“I need to make sure it’s understood. Don’t you agree?”

“….Hyeji? You’re smiling, right? But your eyes look dead?”

In that moment, Hyeji’s face twisted.

With gritted teeth, she unleashed a storm of rage.

“Why are you the one who understands this when just a moment ago I got treated like trash?!?!”

“Hyeji, I’m sorry. But can I say just one thing?”

“Go ahead.”

Hyeji stared at me quietly, as if it was her last chance.

In her eyes, a faint glimmer of expectation flickered.

“There are too many weapons. Please cut it down to half.”

“Just get hit and die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Of course, it quickly vanished.

As soon as Hyeji finished her words, the gun she held and the many weapons she manifested went off.

The deafening sound of gunfire assaulted my eardrums.

The dense smell of gunpowder caused me to fear I might go numb.

And with no room for a moment’s rest, bullets filled the air.

“Ah!!!!! It hurts too much!!!!!!”

“I made it hurt, you bastard!!!!!!!”

“Just ease up a bit! At this rate, I’ll die!”

“Just please die!!! Don’t even breathe!!! Just die!!!”

It was one-sided violence.

Until the usage time of the sparring ground ended.

The defensive coat nearly reached its limit, but Hyeji didn’t stop.

Instead, Hyeji shot with even greater fervor as if delighted by the situation.

That day, instead of learning about abilities, I learned two facts.

One. White phosphorus grenades hurt a freaking lot.

Two. Don’t mess with Hyeji.

[……Are you alright?]

“Damn, it’s a 500 won white phosphorus grenade. A 1000 won white phosphorus grenade. It freaking hurts.”

As soon as the usage time ended, Hyeji turned her back and strode off to the dormitory.

She seemed like she was still boiling with anger.

I wanted to catch her, but my body felt paralyzed, so I couldn’t speak a word.

After Hyeji left, once my body got a bit better, I also returned to the dormitory.

After roughly washing up and lying on the bed, a voice resonates in my head.

[Look at you, you got hit so joyfully.]

‘I got beaten up hard, huh.’

[You deserved it.]

‘No way, you should hit lightly. Even newbies don’t get hit like this in Tekken.’

Though there were no visible scars left, it felt like phantom pain was nagging at my body.

[If you don’t know Tekken, you get hit. Not having common sense means you should get hit.]

‘What’s the psychology behind this?’

[Isn’t it more fun if I don’t tell you directly?]

A mocking voice laughed at me, chuckling.

The more I listened, the more irritation welled up.

‘Is that so? Then I’ll make it unfun for you too.’

[I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.]

A pathetic little bastard.

This is HAL gaslighting.

Thank you, Han Dae-ri.



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