chapter 18
18. The Voiceless Voice of the Brave
“Where is Krovikas?”
My voice was so low it even surprised myself.
It seemed my emotions had gotten the better of me. Calm down. Be rational.
I took a deep breath, letting out a slow “Fu-” as I exhaled.
Noel looked at me with a mixture of amazement and disappointment.
“Calm down, you’re not yourself.”
“I’m sorry.”
“You’re angry because of the Demon Clan? That’s not like you.”
Noel shook her head, muttering “good grief.”
She knew what had happened to Beriel, how he had met his end. But this was her reaction.
Unlike us, she had been holed up in the church and hadn’t been in contact with Beriel, so maybe her impression of the Demon Clan was naturally bad.
From her perspective, it was as if her friends had been forced to search for the Demon Clan’s family, only to be attacked. That’s how it felt.
Even if there were circumstances, it wasn’t something Noel would know about.
That’s just how Elves were.
“And what about Krovikas’s location?”
“I want to know where he is.”
“I’m not going to answer that question.”
“Why not!?”
My voice slipped out again. Noel shook her head, looking troubled.
“If I told you now, you’d probably rush off immediately. The opponent is a seasoned Demon Clan warrior. If we don’t prepare properly, we’ll definitely lose this time.”
Her words were as solid as a rock. She wasn’t wrong about a single thing.
As Noel said, if I knew Krovikas’s location, I would have set off immediately. That would be no good. The opponent was a seasoned warrior who had been fighting Elves and humans since the beginning. Unlike Beriel, they wouldn’t hesitate to kill.
If we let our guard down, we would definitely be killed. That’s why we needed to prepare thoroughly.
Thanks to Noel, I was able to calm down.
“That’s right. Let’s prepare carefully.
When should we set off?”
“How about in 5 days? We’re supposed to receive contact from the church in 3 days. I think it’s better to organize our information and set off again.”
“Got it. I’ll let the party members know.
So, it seems Krovikas is being watched by someone from the church?”
“That’s right. It seems there’s no conspicuous movement for now, so don’t worry.”
It seemed we would know Krovikas’s location in 3 days at the earliest. We would need to organize the church’s information and confirm it before we set off.
It was clear from Noel’s words that the Elves were putting a lot of effort into espionage, not just against the Demon Clan.
“I’ll head back to my friends’ place for now. If I show up at the church in about three days, that should be fine, right?”
“I want to hear a report from you first. I need to explain things to the others, so can you come back in four days?”
“Alright, I’ll bring everyone with me in four days.”
“I’ll leave the preparations to you. I don’t want to negotiate with a human merchant, so I’ll just gather information and wait.”
It seems like our roles are clear.
If I let her negotiate with a merchant, it would be a huge commotion. There’s no way an elven merchant would exist outside of the elven kingdom…
I’ll head back to the inn for now. I also need to see Noel’s face and share this with my friends.
There are people who haven’t returned even at night, and some whose whereabouts are unknown. We should move quickly.
“Let’s meet in four days. Don’t push yourself too hard, Noel.”
“Who are you talking to? You and I are different, after all. Don’t worry about it.”
Her confidence is still unwavering, just like in the past.
I think it’s better to leave the information gathering to her. As for travel preparations, I should take the lead.
Eclair won’t talk to merchants, so there won’t be any negotiations, and if we leave it to Sasha, she’ll just end up buying unnecessary wine.
As for Tor and Dar… well, let’s not think about it. We had a bad experience with them before.
I bid farewell to Noel and leave the church. I think I heard her say something as I was leaving, but maybe it was just my imagination…
“Can’t you stay with us a bit longer…”
When I returned to the inn, I was greeted not by my party members but by the innkeeper and a guard.
How many times is this now? I don’t need to hear the explanation. It seems like someone has done it again.
“Is that Mr. Kail?”
“That’s me. What’s going on?”
This guard is different from the one before. He confirms my identity and bows.
The innkeeper’s sympathetic gaze beside him is painful.
“Mr. Kail, a member of the same hero party as you, Lady Eclair, has been caught for not paying her bills. Can you handle this?”
“I understand. I’ll take care of it.”
It seems like Eclair has done it again. It’s been a while since she’s caused trouble.
This time, it’s about not paying her bills… I don’t think she’s short on money, but maybe something happened?
Oh well. If I pay the compensation, it’ll be resolved. Let’s just get it over with.
Just like last time with Tor, I’m escorted by the guard to the station, where I see Eclair looking dejected.
She seems to be reflecting on her actions. I don’t think she has any ill intentions. Maybe she just forgot to bring her money and couldn’t explain herself?
“Sorry to trouble you. What did the shop owner say?”
“The shop owner said they’re fine as long as they get paid.”
“I understand. How much do I need to pay?”
After confirming, I realize it’s not a large amount. I take out the money from my pouch and hand it over to the guard, who thanks me, saying “You’re really going through a lot, Mr. Kail.” He’s the same guard as before.
It’s a dirty story, but problems that can be solved with money are easy to deal with.
“Eclair, I paid the bill, so let’s go. We’ll apologize to the shop owner later.”
“………”
She nods with a tearful face.
Compared to Tor’s time, the damage to my stomach is smaller. I think she’ll be more careful from now on, and it’ll be okay.
We leave the station and walk in silence for a while. Eclair is originally quiet, so it’s not like I’m not talking to her. It’s just that she’s really down, so it’s hard to talk to her.
It’s better to hear the story, isn’t it?
“Ekurea, let’s sit down and talk for a bit?”
“………” * silence *
“I think there’s a store nearby. Let’s order a drink and talk.”
“…………” * silence *
I wish she would talk, but it can’t be helped. I’ll just have to accept it as part of her personality…
I walk with Ekurea to the store. I remember a customer from the inn recommending their fruit juice, so I’ll order that.
“Do you want the same thing, Ekurea?”
“…………”
She nods. I order from the store employee and turn to face Ekurea, who has been looking down since earlier.
It’s not like she’s that upset, but compared to the other members, she’s still quite cute.
The store employee brings the fruit juice, and I start talking to her. I’ve already somewhat guessed what’s going on.
“Did you forget your money or something?”
“………” * silence *
“Did you realize it after you ate?”
“…………” * silence *
“So, you couldn’t explain it and it turned into a big deal, huh?”
“…………” * silence *
Ekurea looks like she’s about to cry. Since she’s not talking, I feel like I’m interrogating her.
The circumstances of her getting caught are just as I expected. If this continues, she’ll just keep getting more upset. Maybe I should change the subject. There’s something I want to ask her too.
“Ekurea, can I ask you something?”
“…………” * silence *
“If it’s an impolite question, you don’t have to answer. Can’t you talk, Ekurea?”
She’s never tried to talk before. I wonder if she’s embarrassed to speak or if it’s just hard for her. But it’s ridiculous that she won’t talk at all. Is it not that she can’t talk, but rather that she won’t?
She nods slightly. It seems like she really can’t talk.
“Is it some kind of illness or curse?”
Ekurea shakes her head. It’s not a hospital thing.
“Is it a curse or something?”
Ekurea shakes her head again. If it’s not an illness and not a curse, then what is it?
“Is it something you’re born with?”
Ekurea nods. So it’s something she’s born with. Maybe it’s related to her being a hero?
I don’t get it. She’s looking at me like she wants to convey something, but I don’t know what.
If she can’t talk, then what about writing?
“I understand you can’t talk. Can’t you write?”
Ekurea shakes her head. She can’t write? She can read, so it’s not like she can’t write. What’s going on? It’s inexplicable. Is there something going on?
“Do you know what’s causing it yourself?”
Ekurea nods. She knows the cause, which is something she’s born with. I think about it. There must be some kind of hint.
The reason she can’t talk isn’t an illness or curse, and she can read but can’t write. Is some kind of power interfering? If that’s the case…
“Is it maybe related to God?”
Ekurea doesn’t nod or shake her head. She just looks straight at me with an imploring gaze.
“Last question. Is Eclair a reincarnator?”
Same as before. Not nodding, not shaking her head. Just gazing straight at me with an unwavering stare, just like earlier. When I mentioned “reincarnator,” her pupils quivered slightly. It seems that’s the case.
“You can’t say it, huh?”
Eclair nodded. I understood well.
She’s a fellow reincarnator, just like me.
Episode 1. Brave Eclair Can’t Speak
───○ Month ✕ Day, I died.
The cause of death was nothing but a senseless suicide by jumping.
I had lost hope in living, and my mind was a mess, wondering what to do, feeling like I was stuck. I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could meet him again if I died.
The one who protected me and got hit by a truck, Takahashi Atsushi-kun.
We weren’t lovers or close friends. We were just coworkers and former classmates, and friends with my older brother. That’s all.
No, I should stop lying to myself. He was the person I liked.
I liked him so much, it was unbearable. I loved him deeply, ever since he saved me from bullying back in school days.
I couldn’t express my feelings all this time. I hated my own cowardice.
I hated myself for not being brave enough. I hated myself for being content with just being by his side.
I hated myself for only being able to follow him.
I chose the same school and workplace as him, just to follow him. I was happy just watching him from afar.
If possible, I wanted to confess my feelings and become his lover, but I was happy just being near him.
Even after his death, I’m still trying to follow him.
I’m sure people would call me a stalker.
“You know, don’t you? You’re dead. The cause of death was suicide.”
“Yes.”
“Normally, you should’ve lived a bit longer, but oh well, that’s just how it is.”
She introduced herself as Mirabel.
Apparently, she’s a god-like existence.
“Let’s get going to your next reincarnation spot! It’s already decided, so let’s hurry up!”
“Wait!”
“What’s wrong? Ah, worried about your species? Don’t worry, you’ll be human in your next life.”
There are cases where I wouldn’t be human, right!? That’s unbearable, but that’s not it!
“Is it the same world where Takahashi-kun, who protected me and died, is?”
“Hmm, who was it again? Ah, that kid! Unfortunately, it’s not the same. You have your own reincarnation spot prepared, so go there.”
She flipped through the papers on her desk to confirm, but that wasn’t the answer I was hoping for.
“Is it impossible to be in the same world?”
“It’s impossible.”
“Why is that!?”
“It’s just that the flow of life for those with a predetermined fate is already decided. Everything from birth to death is already set in motion. You can’t change it.”
“Then… “
“Hmm?”
“Then, dying is pointless! A world without Takahashi-kun is pointless to me!”
“I can’t live in a world without him!”
I thought that if I died, I could meet him. But even if I die, I still can’t meet him. A world without Tono-kun?
No way. I absolutely won’t accept that.
“You can’t force something that’s impossible. Give up.”
“Please! Let me go to the same world as Tono-kun!”
“That’s exactly why it’s impossible…”
“I don’t care what happens to me! I’ll take any punishment! Just let me go to the same world as Tono-kun!”
“You…”
I’d do anything, even if it means kneeling on the ground. If you tell me to die, I’ll die. I’m already dead, anyway.
If you tell me to take humiliation, I’ll take it. If that means I can meet Tono-kun, I don’t care.
I’ll do anything. Whatever happens to me is fine. Just let me go to the same world.
After a few seconds of silence, a sigh could be heard.
“If you try to forcefully změny the flow of your predetermined fate, it will cause a huge distortion. You’ll have to receive a corresponding penalty.
It’s not like you can just transfer to a new world and get what you want. But is that okay with you?”
“Yes! I have no interest in a world without Tono-kun.”
” Humans are really something…”
Mirabel seemed to be saying “good grief”.
She’s talking about gods, but she’s really human-like.
“That’s right. Let’s talk about the penalty, then. If you say something different after you’re reborn, it’ll be a problem.
If you want to give up after hearing about it, just say so.”
“Yes.”
I can tell she’s worried about me. She’s basically kind.
“You won’t be able to say a word in the world you’re reborn into. You can read, but you won’t be able to have conversations through writing.
You’ll have to convey what you want to say through actions, without nodding or shaking your head. It’s incredibly inconvenient, more so than you think.
Will you still go?”
“Yes! If Tono-kun is there, I’ll go!”
Another sigh. She probably wanted me to give up.
“To be honest, this penalty is to prevent other gods from finding out. It’s to bind you so you won’t talk about this in the world you’re reborn into.
If you lose your memories, you won’t need this penalty, but that’s not an option, is it?”
“Yes. I don’t want to forget about Tono-kun.”
If I forget about Tono-kun after being reborn, it would be meaningless.
“Sometimes, other gods check up on us. They want to make sure we’re doing our job properly.
What I’m trying to do now is, to be honest, unfair. If I get caught, I won’t just get demoted. So, I want you to transfer to the planned world…”
She stared at me intensely. This is the crucial moment.
“I understand!! I’ll make it happen. But I won’t compromise on the penalty, since my risk is already high.”
“Yes! Thank you! I’ll accept any penalty.”
“This conversation we’re having now is also forbidden. You can’t talk about your past life, being a reincarnated person, or the fact that I, a god, am involved.
Since your loved one is already in the world you’re reborn into, you’re a target for checks! I’ll make sure you don’t get caught!”
It’s like I’m going crazy. But it’s my fault, anyway.
“I’ll do this. You’ll definitely meet your loved one.”
“Yes! I’ll definitely meet Dun-kun!”
“The world you’re going to is a bit harsh, so I’ll give you all my talent. It’s enough to make you the protagonist of the story.”
“Thank you! I appreciate it.”
“Then, I’ll give you a penalty. Off you go.”
The light released from her hand hit me.
Huh? I’m trying to talk, but my voice won’t come out. This feeling is weird.
This level of risk is worth it! If I can meet Dun-kun, I don’t care. I’ll go to your side again. This time, I’ll convey my feelings. Ah, I can’t talk. How am I supposed to convey them?
───Farewell, Satou Shiori (previous life). And I was reborn as Eclair Ferglant.
“Oh, by the way, is that child okay? I gave them talent, so I don’t think they’ll die easily, but let’s check on them in about 10 years.”
Mirabel said something like that. Whatever.
The most troublesome thing after reincarnation was my childhood, especially when I was a baby.
I couldn’t talk, no matter what I said.
I remember my parents and the priest panicking because I wouldn’t make a sound as a baby. I felt sorry for causing them so much worry and trouble back then.
They investigated whether I was sick or cursed, and finally, the priest judged that I had the blessing of God. That’s probably the reason.
More like a penalty, though…
Well, thanks to the interpretation that I had a blessing, I was treated as a special child, and that was good.
If I had been treated as a weird child, I might have been abandoned by my parents.
So, I was raised with great care, being told that I was born with the blessing of God.
My family’s lineage being related to heroes was a big deal, I think. Since I was born with the blessing, everyone thought I would definitely become the next hero.
I wanted to deny it, but I couldn’t talk. I was just a baby, after all.
───Time flew by!
Around the age of 5, I started imitating my father’s sword swings with a wooden stick.
It seemed like Dun-kun was in this world, but I didn’t know where. That meant I had to search the entire world.
But, it seems like this world is quite dangerous, with monsters and bandits, so I need to be careful.
Honestly, I only learned piano and was terrible at sports, so I thought I’d be bad at sword fighting, but this body is amazing!
What my father taught me stuck with me quickly. Mirabel was right; I have incredible talent.
As I swung my wooden stick, my father proudly said, “You’re truly my child. You already have the talent of a future hero.”
Who’s he trying to impress?
I still haven’t forgiven him for stroking my cheek with his beard when I was little.
He did that to my soft, delicate skin. I’m the type to hold grudges. I’ll never forgive him.
I want to keep my beautiful skin and have Dun-kun tell me how lovely it is.
───Time flew by!
Around the age of 10, my range of action expanded, and I started exploring various places.
Until now, I was overprotected, so I wasn’t allowed to explore the town alone.
Now, I’m in the kingdom of Arcadia, in a town called Eden, where I was born and raised.
This town is famous for being the birthplace of heroes, and I often see tourists.
The big reason is the large sword stuck in the rock at the town center. Apparently, it’s the holy sword left by the previous hero. Whoever can pull it out is said to be the next hero.
That’s why strong-looking men try to pull it out, but they fail and slump their shoulders.
I think I could do it, though… I wanted to try, but my father and the priest, who’s been living with us, stopped me.
It seems I’m not ready yet. I’ll wait until my body is stronger and I gain more power.
Both of them assume I’ll be the one to back down.
───Time keeps flowing!
Around 15 years old, my body started to take on a more feminine shape.
Unfortunately, just like in my previous life, my chest didn’t grow that much. Well, I’m still growing, so maybe it’ll get bigger later!
Is Dun-kun a chest man? I have confidence in the shape of my butt, so I hope Dun-kun is a butt man.
I’ve inherited my mother’s blood, and now I’m a beautiful girl. I can feel the hot gazes of the boys in the neighborhood, but the only one I’m interested in is Dun-kun. Give up, boys!
I’m currently in intense training so that I can go on a journey to find Dun-kun at any time.
Until my body grows, my main focus has been on muscle training and sword practice, but recently I’ve also been doing sparring with Father.
I thought I could easily win with my exceptional talent, but this bearded old man is incredibly strong. I wonder why he’s so strong, even though he’s not a knight or a mercenary.
I’ll never give up. I’ll defeat him someday.
The priest living with us suggested that I learn magic.
Yes! I’ll become an all-mighty, beautiful girl warrior who can wield both magic and swords!
───Time keeps flowing!
I’ve finally turned 20. In my previous life, I would’ve been considered an adult by now. Unfortunately, my chest still hasn’t grown that much. Maybe it’s a bit smaller than average? I wish I had inherited my mother’s large breasts…
I hope Dun-kun is a butt man.
I was worried that I’d develop weird muscles from all the training, but I’ve managed to maintain soft, feminine skin.
And yet, my physical strength has increased significantly. This must be the power of this world!
Finally, my training has paid off, and I’ve defeated Father. I completely crushed him. Take that, bearded old man! My soft skin was the key to my victory!
My sword skills are also improving rapidly. It’s as if my level is increasing at an incredible rate. This body’s talent is truly amazing.
I’ve also been practicing magic simultaneously. I thought I wouldn’t be able to use magic because I couldn’t speak, but as long as I have the right attributes and magical power, I’m fine.
Chanting incantations increases the power of magic, but even if I don’t chant, I can still cast spells as long as I remember them correctly.
My attributes are “Holy” and “Lightning,” and my magical power is about 30 times that of a normal person. I’ve been told I can make it as a magician. Amazing, right?
When I was around 20, I had the chance to go to the royal capital with Father, but Dun-kun wasn’t there. I searched everywhere, but couldn’t find him.
Where is Dun-kun? I want to see him soon.
I want to go on a journey, but Father and the priest are stopping me. They say my fate is already decided, but it’s not time yet. What are they talking about, these bearded old men?
───Time keeps flowing!
I’ve turned 23. My beauty has been refined, and I’m now known as the most beautiful girl in town.
Honestly, I could meet Dun-kun anytime. I want him to tell me how beautiful and lovely I am.
I want to go on a journey soon.
I think I’m already strong enough, but I’m still not allowed to go. My magic is also getting smoother, and I can easily defeat Father now.
I can even take on Father’s disciples and win. My abilities are more than sufficient. But when I ask for a reason, I get the same response: it’s not time yet. Are they receiving some kind of signal, these bearded old men?
Anyway, until now, everything has been peaceful, but this year, a bit of a commotion has started.
A noble in the Kingdom of Arcadia committed a crime and was stripped of his title and lands. The discontented noble then attacked the church with his soldiers, taking the Elven priests hostage and demanding the return of his title and lands.
Honestly, I think it’s ridiculous. Such demands will never be met, and even if they were, the problem would only be temporarily solved.
However, this is a serious problem for the Kingdom of Arcadia. A noble of their own country has attacked the church, and if they harm the Elven hostages, it’ll become an international issue.
The kingdom is in a predicament, and a messenger even came to Father’s place. I thought they were asking for my help, but it was actually a request for Father to take action. But I’m the stronger one…
In the end, this incident was resolved peacefully.
Father was about to take action, but someone else beat him to it. Apparently, it was a traveling mercenary.
He single-handedly defeated the nobles who had taken over the church, rescuing the hostages.
Amazing, right? I thought “I’m gonna do it!” when I heard the news.
If I recall, it was Kail Grahem, the “Sword Saint”, who was really strong.
He even participated in the Arcadia Kingdom’s Martial Arts Tournament and inherited the title of Sword Saint after winning.
The biggest reason we didn’t have a huge commotion this time was because the Elf’s High Priest, who was present at the scene, mediated the situation.
It could have led to war with the Elf’s country if things went wrong. Good job, unknown mercenary and Elf’s High Priest!
By the way, there’s a rumor that the Demon King has revived, but will we be okay?
───Time flows!
I turned 25 and became a hero.
The rumor about the Demon King’s revival seems to be true, and the demons that had been hiding are now causing chaos everywhere.
The damage is not small, and even the Arcadia Kingdom is affected.
My dad finally said, “The time has come. Follow me, draw the holy sword, and become a hero!” but I had already drawn the holy sword before he said that.
The damage from demons and monsters is increasing, and the world is in chaos.
I think it’s my turn now.
I thought it would be harder to draw the holy sword, but it came out easily. I remember the person who was waiting behind me screaming “Ah!”
When my dad saw me holding the holy sword, he collapsed to his knees. How shocked he must have been, this whiskered old man.
And then, the one who drew the holy sword appeared.
My name spread all over the world as the new hero, and I think the demons are terrified and expecting something from me.
I was summoned to the Arcadia Kingdom as a hero shortly after.
That’s where I met my fate (kare).
“Kail Grahem, the Sword Saint! Thank you for answering my summons. I’m grateful.”
“The threat of demons is a threat to the world. I’m honored to be chosen as the force to counter them.”
I couldn’t take my eyes off the king, who was like a prince from a golden-haired, blue-eyed storybook.
His hair color and eye color were different, but it was undoubtedly him,敦君 (Dun Jun).
His face was exactly the same. He must have dyed his hair and worn color contacts. His physique was a bit more muscular? I liked him in his previous suit, but he also looks great in armor. I love him.
I was planning to travel the world as a hero to search for敦君, but I never thought we’d reunite like this!
Is this what Hige Moja meant by “fate”? Is敦君 my destined person!?
Wait, calm down. I’m getting too excited. It’s been 28 years since I last saw敦君, so I shouldn’t get too carried away.
Right now, the king is saying something important, so I should focus on that… Ah, his serious face is also cool.
“Let’s go, my heroes! Defeat the Demon King and save this world!”
I realized the king had finished speaking, and my face was pale, but I’m okay?
I’m also clutching my stomach, but it doesn’t hurt, right? If I’m just being patient, I should go ahead and do it.
Oh, and it seems like we’re about to set off on a journey?
I was staring at敦君 for too long and didn’t hear anything, but everyone else is moving, so I’ll follow them.
敦君 is right next to me, and it’s not a dream, right? We’ve finally met!
Is this the start of our journey together as a hero party with敦君? It’s too amazing!
“Was it Eclair?”
As soon as we left the castle,敦君 spoke to me. His voice is still the same. Just hearing his voice makes my heart skip a beat.
I’m getting nervous. I want to respond, but I’m too tongue-tied.
For now, I’ll just nod.
“Eclair, the hero. This party has gathered under your leadership. We want you to guide us.”
His serious expression is cool. His blue eyes suit him. He really looks like a prince.
I can’t ignore Dun’s words. I nod to respond.
Am I the leader? What kind of actions should I take as a brave warrior?
Even if I head out, I don’t have a destination. Come to think of it, the game I used to play also had a brave warrior as the main character.
Maybe I should do the same.
I can travel with Dun. That’s the best!
“Who are you?”
I seem to remember that in the game, the brave warrior would enter people’s homes and gather tools. There’s money in the dresser, right? We need travel funds.
As I put the money in my bag, the homeowner starts yelling and attacks me. I’m startled, but I reflexively throw them away.
“What are you doing?”
Dun is startled. I finally calm down. It seems I was too happy to be with Dun and got carried away. My tension is too high, and I’m getting high-strung.
Did I act like I was in a game? Is that a crime?
Ah, the city guards are coming.
Honestly, it’s embarrassing. I want to dig a hole and hide.
And to make matters worse, I did it in front of Dun. Thanks to Dun’s quick thinking, I didn’t get caught, but I still did it!
“It’s okay? Everyone makes mistakes. What’s important is not to repeat the same mistake. Let’s move on.”
Dun’s encouraging voice makes me want to cry.
His kindness is painful.
I want to turn back time right now. When I reunite with Dun, I want to start again and be more like a brave warrior.
However, what’s done is done. As Dun said, I won’t make the same mistake again. I’ll move on! I’ll be brave!
I nod, and Dun smiles slightly. So cool! So charming! I want to be with him!
I want to convey my feelings, but the words won’t come out. My embarrassment gets the better of me, and I’m satisfied just being near him.
I want to change. I want to be brave.
───A brave warrior is someone with courage!
I’ll convey my feelings to Dun before this journey ends.
───”I’ve liked you since before I was reincarnated.”