Chapter 32: A Bitter Fear
Mavin found himself on the pier. Far from the noises of the Capital City, where he finds some bit of peace. The peace was something that he had cherished and thought maybe some of her works had brought him to a train of thought.
He should be in the capital to find Null. But he had to drive to this place to clear his head. There was a smell of salt air in the air. He found a path leading to the sun, and the world was in a dome. There were boats to his right. There was a place on the rocks where the fishermen were taking time to get some fish. And found that they smoke a brand of cigarette that was popular among the soldiers. It was a lucky star cigarette that everyone was smoking back then.
Mavin was just glad to stare at the sea. As someone who came from the mountains. He had always liked the view of the sea and stars. They were beautiful during the night. The coolness was something that he missed dearly. Although, he had been outside of the city to deal with the baroness. He didn’t have the time to admire the beauty of the sea itself.
It has been so long, Mavin thought to himself. Ever since the day that I started this. During that night, on the hill, where I remembered the memories. I haven’t thought of the memories ever since then. Who would want to believe that it was real?
He tried to believe that there was more to it. That there was no way that those delusions could be real. Truthfully, he had felt an existential crisis that almost drove him mad.
Who wouldn’t be afraid knowing that it was all part of kismet? A destiny that one day he had to face. Mavin had wanted people to know of this secret, but when he had done so. His parents still went ahead and fulfilled their destiny. The only difference was that they didn’t die without taking down the demifiends that were on their way.
Mavin felt cold since that day. He thought that there was something in his heart that made him focus on what needs to be done.
The vision of Lazon burning. An Empire burning and the people he knew were fighting for their lives. Mavin couldn’t deny that he was afraid of Natalya Wilde more than anyone. Who wouldn’t be afraid of a woman who in his vision, was the single reason that the Empire itself was burning? Where iron giants walked the earth, where the demikins would lower their heads in worship to the Imperator who would rule the continent. The woman who had been called ‘lady death’ by her peers?
I am afraid of her, Mavin confessed.
When he got out of bed this morning. He couldn’t look her in the eyes. She had no intention to speak. She went out of her way to avoid him, and she had no desire to make him know what she was doing. She does what she does and that bothers him.
Among the people that he had met. She was the only one who didn’t follow the pattern that his memories told him. She did not have her arrogance, and if she had that. She was hiding it so masterfully that it was hard to frankly tell her. Her words were sincere and insincere. She speaks without tone and yet she desires nothing more than to fly a plane.
Mavin could tell that something was going on behind that desire of her to fly a plane. He could follow her and wonder what she was doing, but that was completely breaking her trust.
He had no right to intrude on her life. She had no desire to intrude on his and had been only giving him words. Mavin’s only reason why he even let her in the ancestral house was because of fear. Fear that she would do something that would lead him to believe that it was better to place a bullet in her head than let this farce play out.
Mavin wanted to believe that there was more to her. He had seen that change happen at Kohl. How he returned to his beloved without accident, proving that there was change if he strives for it.
He doubts that she was the same. He couldn’t let the ‘memories’ influence him too much, but the fear of the Imperator was getting to him. The war was prevented, and the war of attrition that would have continued among the borders was prevented by the signing of the treaty in flost city.
Old Sable was dead.
The revolutionaries were gone. However, Mavin was starting to suspect that there was still a divide among the nobles. The problems within the ebony market, the appearance of the baroness, and General Steelheart coming to the Empire to offer the technology was something that shook his belief.
This time the technology wasn’t going to the Empire, but distributed to Lazon as well. The factories and production centers would still be in the city, but it wasn’t going to be as centralized as before.
The baroness still owns the Falcone Family. Prince Kaleb was still the King of the Ebony market. The Bradley Family was more powerful. The biggest change was the existence of the Lazon Family’s presence and Natalya Wilde being in the Empire’s capital city.
She was someone who shouldn't appear in the city at all. There was no remark or profile on her activities inside his memories. That bothered Mavin because he had no vision of what will happen next with her in the city. She shouldn’t even be in the same place where the ‘spark’ happens.
Mavin felt incredibly helpless when it came to her. At least he had an understanding of how some of the people that he knew functions. He can understand and identify what their thoughts are. It was because of this that they had let him in. Without that, Mavin felt helpless, and he knew that he had become too reliant on memories that were starting to become useless.
Mavin after some time alone went out of the pier, entered the cobblestoned streets, and got in his car. He drove from the pier to the Academy. The weather was mild and tempered. Mavin found a spot in the Academy’s parking lot. After he got out of his car and locked the door. Mavin walked to the main building while ignoring the looks of the students who looked at the suit he wore.
Mavin noticed that the electricians were working the electrical lines of the Academy’s main building. There were extra soldiers on duty and there were those who recognized Mavin from his time in the field. He exchanged a few greetings and went to the mechanical division of the Academy. The mechanical division’s archive is filled with documentation, books, and research papers on their recent studies.
He did not find the educational journals that should have been in the archive. He moved out of the archive’s dusty bookcases-filled room and entered another room that was staying cool. It was one of the places in the academy kept cooled and electricity-proofed. In the middle of the room was one of the electric computers that the Academy has. With a ten-hole punched tape input and a teleprinter display. The 50kw machine was one of the most hidden technologies of the mechanical division.
However, there was more to the ‘memories’ than the events that might happen. Mavin could vaguely remember the common sense knowledge of the person looking beyond that screen. He knew what he knew. He had an idea on technology and had an inner instinct on technology far advanced than what the people here know. However, he only knew how to operate them. He had no inkling on how to build the far advanced ones to the point that it seemed magical to him. Just because he knew what the materials were, does not mean he had the actual blueprint to make them all from scratch. However, he had some recollection of weapons that might prove useful, and you could say that some of these are in the good hands of the Enforcers of the Lazon Family.
He ran his fingers on the teleprinter and checked on the computer. After making sure that the computer was running fine, he rounded the computer, checked the wiring and the jack before nodding his head. He walked out of the room and met eyes with the person inside of the mechanical division. Before there was any misunderstanding regarding why he was in the room. He presented his identification and told the person that he was one of the people who had helped in assembling the machine.
Though impressed, the person walked into the room and checked for the computer, just in case. It was then that Mavin decided to take a seat inside the mechanical division’s main hall. The electrical wiring, the machines, and their equipment unusable and fried, there was nothing they could. There was nothing much to do other than watch and sometimes help them in lifting the heavy machinery. The boons he collected had allowed him to reach a physical peak that was just a step away from being an enhanced human.
Mavin had originally wanted to keep those boons and give them to his peers and develop the serum that would strengthen them. He took those serums from the places that they should be and from what he could remember, those ‘boons’ were an accidental medication that made the user stronger. He had time to develop himself before the war, and he was heavily involved with the ebony market so that he could get the items.
He would not have met the baroness when he was young. Mavin made sure that he had the items. Most of his activities before the seven-year was getting involved with Rose, helping people out that will lead him to the ‘boons’ and dealing with the baroness early so that she would get an idea how beneficial it would be if she enters the market early in her career.
Mavin wanted a broker that was interested in dealing with the Tomas and the Bradley family only. All of these opportunities and ideas were merely something that he had borrowed from the Prince who would criticize them later for their lack of power. The steps he had taken were masterful, but it was not his idea in the first place. He had made use of their ideas before they could profit from it.
They think that I am some kind of masterful schemer when in truth, most of the ideas came from the ‘memories’ and the wisdom of my peers. I do not have the talent and ability to rule so I handed them to Derrick because he knows what to do. Countess Elma, though she has her reasons to become a Tomas, she is a loyal person who would do anything for Lazon first, before the Empire.
Mavin had no delusion that he could rule an entire region the size of two countries. The size of the Greater Lazon right now even made him more hesitant to take the burden of rule. Sure, there were a lot of impassable terrains and mountains, but the south of Lazon had become a breadbasket and the place where resources were. Not to mention that the advances in technology had allowed them to create bridges and reform the land to a place where they can live better. Most of Lazon had flat grasslands and uneven terrain that it took years to cultivate the land to what it was.
He did not have the patients and temperance to rule the land. Many had called him a fool for abandoning power. However, Mavin had already made it clear that the throne of Lazon had always belonged to the one who was worthy of it. There were only four people worthy of Lazon. Old Fred, Count Derrick, Count Elma, and Logain Strom. He was not worthy of the throne and he wanted none of it.
The Academy of Arkadia had many departments. Most of the main departments are located in the center of the Academy and connected to the main building. Built like a city.
There are many places in the Academy where the corresponding departments are located. One of those was the arts and literature building built like a rounded palace.
Mavin traveled his gaze on the painters just outside of the palace. He was about to move on when he locked eyes with a person whose eyes were golden. She wore a dress accented white and blue with frills and laces. Her left hand held an umbrella, and the other hand carried her luggage of painting tools. Her eyes dilated for a moment before her lips lifted.
“Well, if it isn’t Mav, strange how you’ve grown tall enough. Don’t stand, come and help me, it’s not like you anything else to do, Constable.”
Mavin took her painting tools and walked side by side with Princess Cecilia.
“Are you a Teacher now, milady?”
“It’s a ‘Professor’ now Mavin Tomas. Hmm, you have grown and wonderful in the years that passed.”
Mavin looked away. Finding his silence intriguing, her eyes landed on him.
“Oh my, do you have complaints about my appearance?”
“Nonsense, however, says that the Princess is lacking will have my fist on their face.”
“How old are you?”
“I am twenty-three, milady.”
“Twenty-three, and still have no interest in having a family?”
“Have you been betrothed, milady?”
“Unfortunately, my love for my hobbies is more interesting. I’d call you if I have interest in experiencing what my dear mother feels, and then I shall have you represent your sinful body to me,” she said lightly. Mavin opened the door for her.
“I guess you’re doing well.”
“Guessing that I am doing well…I don’t understand your words. For now, how about you enter with me?”
The palace’s main lobby was decorated lavishly with mahogany panel walls, matted floors, and decorations that allowed the artists to place their work on the wall once a week. Most of the artists bowed their heads immediately after seeing the Princess. Mavin followed her until they reached her studio. Her studio smelled like paint, oil, and glue. There were cans of paint strewn and littered across the floor. A canvas spotted with red and blue colors. Mavin almost stepped on a strange figure in the room.
“Is that why you allowed me in your studio?”
She tilted her head and smiled, “Nonsense, but would you kindly help me?”
Mavin took his vest, coat, and suit, rolling his sleeves. He unfastened his tie and walked to the storage closet where he found a dusty broom. He first picked the materials on the floor and started cleaning the room.
“Usually, a maid should be responsible for this.”
“And let another foot sully my studio?”
Mavin shook his head. The Princess set aside her tools and looked at the sculpture in her workplace. It was the area where she does her work. She sat on her stool and stared at the block of wood sitting in front of her.
“Do you think that my father would appreciate this?”
“I am sure he will.”
“That reminds me, he was rather displeased when you didn’t attend the award ceremony. You have enough medals to get a title and even land a Princess. It was a shame that you did not appear. Thank you for that, the 108th nobles can be unbearable that I’d rather start an uprising.”
“Please no. I rather not worry about you.”
“Why not, it might be fun seeing you distress about my actions.”
Mavin stopped. He leaned his forehead on the broom, “No, I rather stop you right now rather than entertain such ideas, Princess.”
“Well, you must be worried about something. You have become much more expressive than before. Better than that dead-eyed look on your face that makes men get the chills and the women wet.”
“Princess…”
“Please, I am merely joking. Or does it not suit me?” she snickered. “I like saying such things lately. The look on my brothers face is such a delight. Of course, it is only because you are one of my few friends that I am speaking like this. Do not worry about this Princess, I am careful.”
Mavin shook his head. He swept the broom around the room. Mavin felt the Princess’s stare.
“You’re bothered by something and it is showing. You have great over your emotions, at least on your face, but you wear your heart on your sleeves next to us.”
“Do I do that?”
“Yes, it is unsettling to watch and I rather have you out of here than suffer this.”
Mavin hesitated. “Princess, are you a crow or a raven?”
The Princess’s glare sharpened, “A cassowary, I do not want to be both of those. They are such boring creatures. Though the cassowary is a flightless bird, it is still one of the most fearsome birds.”
“I see.”
The Princess shook her head. “What is it with you people and birds? Next time, do not such ask me such a stupid question.”
“What about your brothers?”
“I don’t care what kind of bird they are or what they identify as. Please, spare me this question of whether one has more value and if the other is an ill omen.”
“I will.”
“Good,” the princess said, her voice was soft. “If I was the Empress I would have beheaded you for it.”
“Please don’t say such things, milady.”
The Princess smiled but did not speak. She focused her eyes on the block of wood. “I can still remember your audacity eight years ago.
However, you knocking me down gently had allowed me to discover my love for the arts than the politicking of high society. I don’t understand why you were so adamant in saving me that day.”
“You were the best girl,” he repeated what the person in the 'memories' would say.
“Such a strange language, what does that mean?”
Mavin shook his head. “That is one of the few things that I can never tell you, Princess.”
“Aha, is that so?”
“Yes,” Mavin stopped himself.
“That’s nice, but can you keep cleaning?
Mavin sagged his shoulders and continued sweeping the floor.
The room looked pristine the moment Mavin finished cleaning. In the area where the Princess was carving, there were shavings of wood from the block of wood she was working on. The Princess studied the wooden block. Her eyes scrutinizing every detail on the figure carved from the wood.
“How is it?”
“Okay.”
“Okay? Did dust blind you? Look at it, it’s beautiful.”
Mavin placed the broom aside. He walked next to the Princess and studied the figure. “You do know that my taste in fine arts is abyssal.”
She looked at the head of the figure. Her chisel adjusted the size of the brow.
“Who is it?” Mavin asked.
“Someone who I imagined, of course, it could have been my lover.”
“Congrats.”
She stopped her hand and ran her palm on the cheeks of the head.
“Whatever happened to that sweet boy once again,” she began.
“Remember when you visited the castle? You were always so eager, hopeful, and then utterly convinced me to look forward to my debutante, because you said that you would dance with me. We used to play around the Imperial Palace, share naps, and when I visited Lazon, you would always accompany me. Therefore, I was surprised to see that the person who would smile at me turned so cold. As if, you had sealed your heart behind that cold exterior. I was worried that you had changed. The trauma had gotten to you. I heard of what happened. What you did and how you threw it away, including me.”
“Princess, I didn’t--”
“Maybe, but I understand where you were coming from. But the past is past, and eight years is a long period,” she shook the shaving of wood on the tip of her chisel. “Our paths diverted the moment you threw it all away for war. You could have stayed home, waited for my debutante, and we would have walked the aisle. Did you also give away that cabin of yours in Lazon?”
“No. I didn’t,” Mavin said sincerely. “That was the only place that I could not give away.”
“Is that so?”
Her demeanor stiffened for a moment, the Princess bit her lip, and then breathed out. She started carving the cheeks of the human head. Her eyes focused on adjusting the features of the figure.
“I heard many things. My brothers and my father talked a lot about you. How you disappeared like a ghost and brought many enemies. You even save my brother from death. Odd that you have never met my eldest brother, and have never shown any interest in him even when you could have the time. The Ghost of Dinia, the butcher of Sinia, they call you many things. How did it feel?”
“Feel what?”
“Doing what you did.”
“Awful and the recoil was bad. The dirt keeps going on my mouth when I prone on the trench. 72 hours of nonstop rest, and the best days are when I am in the mountains. Many would love to be in the mountain rather than in the trenches. The Frans always deployed the gas and nothing to do than pray to god that a stray shell or a bullet does not get you. I did what I did because one less soldier meant one less rifle firing. I hunted down soldiers day and night for the sake of fighting. I had my orders and that was to keep our men safe. I ran around the field sabotaging anything that I could. Not once, I found peace. People tell me that I have gotten a lot better when I got back home. That my complexion got better than the dead-eyed look that I had after ma and pa died. Do you know why?”
Mavin saw her folding her arms. She was one among the many who would listen. A sturdy wall separated them now. Nevertheless, he knew that among many of the people he knew, she would listen.
“I saw a good man lying down in a shell-hole looking at the picture of a woman. He was afraid, but he wanted to fight. It would have been natural that I would have left him alone and prioritized my safety, and we alone would not survive. But I still ran him down and hoped that he would make it out alive. I made sure that he would go back home and watched his back when I was in the area. Five years later, I had to take a trip around the provinces, tell the good people that their son is dead, and then run to whatever place they told me to go so that they needed someone to watch their backs. I did not care how many medals and praises they gave me. Honestly, I was hoping more to know what he had been up to and has done. Did he make it back home? Did he see his beloved again?”
“Did he?”
Mavin nodded and his face seems to melt. That stony look melted and the Princess looked at him with a softened expression. She had a look at someone who had not seen the person in front of her for a long time.
“He did. Bastard almost did not have there at the fear of finding out. the person he loves had another. I made sure that he got back home and they would find their happy conclusion. He would have been captured in that place, turned into a prisoner, and they would not meet.”
“You went that far for someone you barely know?”
“I wanted to believe and seeing them reunited made me forget. I am sorry; I don’t know what’s getting into me.”
She looked at the sculpture she made.
“You must have been emotional seeing my masterpiece. It’s okay.”
“Aha, let’s just say that it is.”
She traced the nose of the figure and nodded her head. “I was wrong it seems.”
“What were you wrong about?”
“I told my brothers that you had changed. That my Mavin was not the person that they would have been talking about. They disliked you because they saw how emotionless you were when you were attending this Academy. I guess you could say that I played a part in making sure that. A woman’s wrath is something you would never understand, and even if you were doing this out of a grand reason. I would never understand and agree because it was enough. Nonetheless, our agreement did give me the freedom to pursue what I wanted to do. Sometimes, I had wondered why you were treating me this way. How did you know?”
“Eight years ago.”
“How did you know exactly?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“I see. I owe you. If you had not bothered them, they would not have known. That is a lot of wealth that you have, an entire research department in Sahus. You know, even without that hospital, even with whatever you are trying to do. I was willing to spend the last days peacefully.”
“I know. I am not strong enough to bear that weight, and if things were different…I would have…I would have.”
“Enough,” she said, this time there was weariness in her voice.
“That’s eight years too late, Mavin. I do not know what you are trying to achieve. I do not know what war you are fighting now and what schemes you have concocted. However, eight years is too long and you know what? I am quite happy that the boy that I met years ago is still in there. He is just trapped in some mission that he does not want anyone to know,” she laughed this time. “I was unsure why I’d let you come here. However, seeing you so lost in thought all alone made me want to talk to you. Who knew that I would be surprised?”
She placed her chisel on the side of her sculpture. She walked to where his vest, coat, and tie. The Princess made Mavin stand up. Mavin wore the vest first, then handed him his coat. She took the tie and fixed it around his neck. She buttoned his coat and nodded in approval. The Princess dusted his shoulders and held his hand.
“I wish you good hunting, my Mavin. I hope you do not stay too long in this city. ”
Mavin smiled wearily, “You three really do want me out of this city, huh?”
“You are making me wish for a happy ending like the story that you told me just now, and I hate you for that. It was nice seeing you, Sir Tomas,” her tone this time was that of a person talking to a stranger.
She walked back to her stool and focused her eyes on it.
Mavin walked in front of the door. He looked back for a moment. The solitary back of the Princess, busying herself in her hobbies gave him peace. Her shoulders shuddered for a moment.
Mavin wondered what was up with that then walked out of the studio. At least she would not be strapped in a hospital bed like in the memories. She could do what she wanted and not care about the affairs of High Society.
You cannot save her.
Mavin hardened his resolve but found it faltering at the sight of those four words he saw in the text boxes in the ‘memories.’
He did not know how the research was going on with Sahus other than they were doing their best to keep the Princess healthy.
It is better this way.
All he wanted to do now was focus on finding Null. Make sure that none of them would come close to even taking the technology out of Rene and Kristine’s hands.