Kiss the Ground

Their bodies were heated from the excitement right after scoring. The air was so hot you could almost see steam, and their sweat-drenched gazes met through the narrow gaps. Chahyun briefly locked eyes with that wavering gaze before moving his hand, which was pinned under someone’s knee, to grasp Misha’s head. He then whispered softly and clearly.“This isn’t part of the contract, either.”When Chahyun frowned and smiled, Misha’s eyes widened momentarily. Chahyun slowly pulled his forehead closer and kissed him directly on the lips. He could feel the trembling breath touching his wet neck.Yes, when you give, you get something in return. It’s a simple equation between people. To teach this to Misha, Yoon Chahyun crossed the invisible line drawn between them.With a slow, dizzying realization, Chahyun squeezed his eyes shut. The sound of cheers, shaking the entire ground, echoed faintly from a distant place.***It was a resounding victory in enemy territory. Flashing lights burst from all directions. As soon as the final whistle blew, Winchester’s players tangled together to celebrate their victory, while the spectators from Villadevald quickly flowed out like an ebb tide.Among them, the most attention-grabbing figures were, of course, Yoon Chahyun and Misha Asplund, the scorers of the first and clinching goals. Journalists with large cameras and dozens of microphones didn’t give Chahyun a moment to enjoy with others.“Misha, Yoon Chahyun, let’s start the winning interview right away.”Dragged by the hands of hurried coaches, Chahyun and Misha entered the familiar press room. In front of them, dozens of reporters with logos from various countries strained to get a glimpse of the two players. As Chahyun received the pressing microphones, he glanced at Misha standing right next to him.‘You played so well, why do you look like that since earlier?’It had been the same since the end of the match. Misha, unable to even wipe the sweat dripping down his chin, stared blankly ahead. He wasn’t looking at the questioning reporters, nor did he seem tired or exhausted. If anything, he appeared deep in thought.Despite the joy and excitement that should have been overwhelming, why does he look so out of it? Especially after scoring such a great goal.Misha was responding to questions, but it sounded more like a monologue than answers. Chahyun smiled and maintained a pleasant expression in his place. After about a dozen questions about the game, the joy of winning, and scoring, they were finally able to leave the press room.By the time the interview ended, all the other Winchester teammates had disappeared into the locker room. Yoon Chahyun and Misha walked down the now quiet corridor in silence. To be precise, Misha was silent.“Misha.”After glancing at his blank side profile several times, Chahyun finally stopped him. Misha, with his arm caught by Chahyun’s hand, stopped and finally looked at Chahyun’s face. His gaze, floating in the air, belatedly settled on his face. That strange feeling made Chahyun frown.There’s definitely something going on.It was unusual for Misha, who always approached others without hesitation, to avoid eye contact. Even with his hair still damp with the urgency of the match.“You’ve been acting strange since earlier. Is it because it’s been a while since you played? Judging by your form, you didn’t seem that tired. You were so excited just a while ago.”“…….”“Or did you suddenly feel unwell? Was it uncomfortable sleeping in my bed?”“Yuan.”Misha’s eyes deepened at Chahyun’s concerned voice. Up close, his expression seemed more troubled than blank.“You’re not hurt, are you?”Feeling a sudden drop in his chest, Chahyun mentally reviewed today’s game. From the substitution to the end of the match. Had Misha fallen or tumbled badly without him noticing?What flashed through his mind was the moment Misha scored, when Chahyun kissed him at the end of the match. Until that moment, Misha had been acting as usual.When he pressed his lips to Misha’s hot forehead and let go, Misha’s eyes were wide open, looking like they might spill over. That vividly remembered black dilated gaze.It must have been from then. That Misha started behaving this way. Chahyun hesitated for a moment before speaking.“Or when I… when you scored that goal earlier.”In hindsight, it was an impulse driven by joy and momentum. Should he make some excuse? Just as Chahyun was about to say something awkwardly, Misha spoke first.“You were right, Yuan.”His voice was low. It was somehow hotter and more urgent than the tepid tone he had used in the interview a moment ago. Chahyun asked foolishly.“About what?”“About the question you asked me yesterday. If I was satisfied with our contractual relationship.”Contract—a sudden word that made Chahyun’s mouth open slightly.It was a connection he hadn’t expected. Until just before the match, they hadn’t shown any sign of bringing up that topic. He thought Misha had either forgotten it or didn’t care.“Oh, that. Yes, I did say that.”Chahyun agreed awkwardly. Misha hesitated for a moment, as if choosing his words. Finally, he spoke.“Yesterday… when you first asked me that, I didn’t understand what you meant. Why you were asking me that question.”Chahyun already knew that. Even after hearing Chahyun’s serious question, Misha hadn’t shown any sign of contemplation. Chahyun still remembered the confused look on his face, as if deflecting the question.“I kept thinking about it since then… and now I think I understand.”So where did this change come from? With a serious expression he’d never shown in front of Chahyun, Misha spoke as if driving a nail.“You were right.”“What…?”“I think we should end the contract.”A cold feeling swept through his legs.Chahyun dropped his arms and stared blankly at Misha’s face. His eyebrows and forehead were tightly drawn together as if enduring something, with a desperate look that seemed to convey he couldn’t understand his own pain. Chahyun felt a hot lump in his throat, rendering him speechless.“I want to stop now.”Misha repeated his words as if confirming them for himself. He looked at Chahyun’s chest with an anxious expression, as if avoiding his gaze.“I know it all started with my mistake. I’m the one who harmed you, and I’m the one who suggested this as a solution. But…”“Misha.”“I don’t think I can do this anymore.”In the hallway, where the voices of their teammates could be faintly heard, Misha dropped his gaze. An unsettling silence spread through the air.Chahyun felt a bead of sweat slide down from his cheek. As the lukewarm breeze brushed his wet legs, his entire focus was on Misha’s voice.“Yuan, I’m the one who made you like this…”The more he spoke, the more Misha’s gaze wavered. His eyes, filled with something unspoken and chaotic, made Chahyun take a step closer unconsciously. His heart ached.But Misha stepped back and spoke his final words. Chahyun stood still, unable to do anything but listen.“I can’t kiss you like that anymore. I’m sorry.”***The contract was over. It was inevitable since one of them didn’t want it anymore. Unlike the pain when it was formed, the end was anticlimactic.As Misha said he wanted to end the contract, he rubbed his forehead, looking as if he had a severe headache. He didn’t make a single groan, but under the shadow, Chahyun could see his painfully distorted eyes.Hearing the sudden rejection just as the euphoria of victory hadn’t yet faded, Chahyun was at a loss for words. The heat dissipated in an instant, and he felt like he was drenched in cold water. Seeing the shocked Chahyun, Misha apologized repeatedly.“I’m sorry, I’m sorry… I want to end it now.” His face looked like he was constantly being pricked by something sharp.Yoon Chahyun, for his part, just smiled. He patted Misha’s arm, saying it was okay, not to worry. He said it was enough now, raising the corners of his mouth.He couldn’t ask, “Why all of a sudden?” because he already knew. No one could happily accept such an abnormal contract. Even if you put yourself in the other’s shoes, it was clear.How could anyone maintain physical contact with someone they liked without any emotional connection, especially for the absurd purpose of personal goals or resolving issues?It must have been hell. Although it was masked by Misha’s blind affection, Chahyun’s heart had already realized it first.But what Chahyun was curious about was the trigger. What had dropped the stone into Misha’s heart?Oddly, this question remained rough and unsettled, like undissolved sugar at the bottom of his heart. As he sat beside the drowsy Jude on the flight back to England, Chahyun kept reflecting on the past few days.Still, there was only one thing that came to mind: the so-called ‘service’ kiss he gave to Misha.“That must have been the problem.”Maybe Misha was tired of Chahyun pushing and pulling him as he pleased. Rejecting him when he approached with contractual terms, only to violate the contract himself without warning. It wasn’t surprising if it became too much.He wasn’t upset, resentful, or worried about what would happen next. Chahyun thought the one-month contract period had been unexpectedly pleasant. He had spent more time with Misha, learned about his family matters he otherwise never would have known, and had countless ridiculous and funny moments. He even got to eat choco-sandwiches.It was okay. It really wasn’t bad. Staring at the clouds beneath the window, Chahyun thought about Misha for hours.***It was late afternoon when Yoon Chahyun arrived home.There were always many things following a victory. Reporters crowded the airport, trying to get even a single word from the players, and fans rushed in with uniforms and pens, blocking their way at every step.Then there were the club’s schedules. Returning gear and enduring interviews, the excitement of victory transformed into a painful fatigue. Using celebration and praise as energy, lifting his exhausted body was a half-day limit. Only after nearly collapsing from personal concerns and physical exhaustion that had filled his mind since the game ended did Chahyun finally head home.‘I really feel like I’m going to die.’It was a miracle he managed to drive. Dragging his heavy legs, Chahyun approached the front door of his house. He just wanted to lie down somewhere and close his eyes.“……”Cold air poured from his heart down to his legs at that moment.There was something there. Something wedged under the door.“…What?”Unconsciously, Chahyun took a step back. Even though it was his house, he couldn’t shake off the eerie feeling. Fixing his gaze on ‘it,’ Chahyun froze.The lukewarm evening air wrapped around his cheeks and neck like a rope. He didn’t know how long he stood there. After a while, Chahyun knelt and looked under the door.A thick envelope was messily jammed into the narrow gap.He wasn’t mistaken. Chahyun reached out with a trembling hand and forcibly pulled the envelope out. He then raised it right in front of his eyes. The front, which looked like it would tear at any moment, had a single number written on it.[2]“How… why.”He felt like he was going to vomit. Despite it being mid-April, his hands and feet were ice-cold. Finding it hard to breathe, Chahyun collapsed on the spot.“How?”The person who sent this, as far as Chahyun knew, shouldn’t be able to do this. He should be in a correctional facility, arrested on the spot as a perpetrator of a terrorist attack against Yoon Chahyun.His mind went blank. He was one step inside, but he couldn’t stand up. Chahyun placed his trembling hand on the floor. A chill emanated from the smooth stone.He needed to ask for help. He needed to report this. In a similar situation, he hadn’t done so, and it had led to an irreversible accident. He had hurt someone else. His hand moved on its own, rummaging through his pockets.After several failed attempts, he managed to tap the screen and turn it on. Looking at the darkly lit keypad, Chahyun’s fingers twitched. He knew the number he had to press, but he couldn’t do it. A strange, unprecedented fear surged within him.“Wait…”Cold sweat had already gathered on his forehead. Chahyun gripped the phone tightly several times before finally making the call. Hearing the dial tone echo like a distant cry, Chahyun pressed his fist to his mouth, trying to control his rough breathing.Someone parked their car smoothly and rushed towards Chahyun. Yoon Chahyun was crouched on the dark entrance’s stone steps, his forehead resting on his knees. Urgent hands wrapped around his shoulders.“Yuan!”Chahyun slowly lifted his head. Against the backdrop of the dark night sky, he saw Misha. Still in the clothes he had worn just before leaving the club, Misha looked down at Chahyun with a desperate and urgent expression.Without thinking, Chahyun raised his knees and threw himself into Misha’s arms. Misha fully embraced Chahyun’s body with both hands. Although he was pushed backward, he didn’t even take a step back.“Misha…!”The other person’s embrace was warm and solid. Pressing his cheek against Misha’s chest, Chahyun wrapped his arms around Misha’s back. He wished someone would hold him tighter and stronger, to surround and protect him. Otherwise, he felt like he might slip and fall into some abyss beneath his feet.“Yuan, it’s okay.”Hearing the quiet voice from above his head, Chahyun clung to Misha’s back even more tightly. A desperate sound escaped his throat.“Misha, what do I do, what do I… I’m sorry.”“Calm down.”“I shouldn’t have called you… You shouldn’t be here.”“Yuan.”Trying to steady his breathing in the warm embrace, Misha placed a hand on Chahyun’s head. That small touch slowly calmed Chahyun’s mind. Blinking repeatedly and taking deep breaths, Chahyun tried to regain his composure.Why did I call Misha?Dialing his number instead of the police was an unconscious impulse. Misha was the biggest victim of this incident, an innocent bystander who shouldn’t be involved. This was something that had befallen Yoon Chahyun alone, and he alone had to bear this crime.But Chahyun had ended up calling Misha.Seeing him run over in a heartbeat filled Chahyun with overwhelming relief. He didn’t know why, but he understood just how selfish and reckless he was. In a situation where he should be protecting and shielding Misha, he had dragged him back into this mess.What if he gets hurt again? What if Misha gets injured because of me and can’t play or train anymore? How could I ever atone for that?Besides, right now, he and I…A burning sense of guilt and contradictory comfort alternated in Chahyun’s mind. Misha, firmly holding Chahyun’s shoulders, looked down at the envelope that had fallen on the floor.“This?”Chahyun clumsily nodded. Misha stroked Chahyun’s back and picked up the envelope with his other hand.“Did you open it?”“…No.”A crushed voice escaped Chahyun’s throat. He knew what was inside, but he couldn’t bring himself to check.With one arm around Chahyun, Misha opened the envelope with his other hand and looked inside. Staring at its contents as if looking at something unpleasant and filthy, Misha slowly reached in and pulled out a bundle of photographs. Seeing the photos in his hand, Chahyun drew in a sharp breath.Misha flipped through the photos one by one. There seemed to be about 20 of them. While he examined the pictures with a serious expression, Chahyun stared at the cold stone floor.“Yuan.”Misha, who had looked over the photos multiple times, called Chahyun in a subdued voice. Were the contents the same as the first time? Chahyun felt too ashamed to lift his head, cursing his past self for not taking it seriously.Misha put the photos back into the envelope. His voice, unlike what Chahyun had heard during the day, was calm and firm.“We should report this to the police. Let’s get help from those around us.”“……”“It’ll be okay. Nothing bad will happen.”Then, still holding Chahyun’s back, Misha carefully knelt. Chahyun, exhausted from a rough match and unexpected events, collapsed into Misha’s embrace. Misha held him tightly by the waist and whispered,“I’ll stay with you.”His voice was like someone gripping a hand dangling off a cliff. Pressing his face into Misha’s broad shoulder, Chahyun squeezed his eyes shut.***With Yoon Chahyun in the passenger seat, Misha’s car glided through the night-covered streets of London.Chahyun rubbed his face with his hands. When he pushed his hair back and looked up, he saw the streetlights flickering on and off. Misha, sitting in the driver’s seat, gripped the steering wheel with a serious expression, as if deep in thought.An hour earlier, Misha had calmed Chahyun at his front door and then immediately pulled out his phone to report the incident to the police. The officers arrived in front of Chahyun’s house within minutes, making his earlier panic seem almost unfounded due to their swift response.The police were just as taken aback after inspecting the second envelope. The perpetrator of the previous incident had already been identified and arrested, and the security personnel who had been guarding the club and Chahyun’s home had long since withdrawn.Moreover, there was no solid evidence to be found, just like with the first envelope. The officer who had handled the previous case spoke with a troubled expression.“It seems we’ll need to question the perpetrator of the terror incident again. I heard he admitted to the crime when shown the photos last time. If this incident is similar…”“…Do you mean there’s a possibility that the two incidents were committed by different people?”“Well, we’ll know more after a re-investigation, but we can’t rule out that possibility. The suspect is quite unstable.”He then glanced at Chahyun and continued,“And… it’s possible this could be a hate crime by an unrelated individual. Given your profession, you’re more susceptible to such exposures.”Misha dealt with the police on behalf of the speechless Chahyun. Despite his displeasure at Chahyun having to personally review the photos for the investigation, there was no other way. Chahyun cautiously looked at the photos handed over by the police.Photos taken from afar, photos taken up close… All were surreptitious shots of Yoon Chahyun. The angles and compositions were disturbingly familiar. Unlike the indifference he felt when he found the first envelope, this time he clearly remembered the impact of the previous incident, as if it were etched into his bones.The agony was unbearable, as if his insides were burning. His anxious gaze shifted from the photos to Misha, who stood beside him, quietly watching. Observing this, the police officer shook his head.“You must be feeling uneasy. For tonight, we’ll increase security around your home. Hiring private security is also a recommended option, but for tonight…”The officer trailed off, suggesting a few options to Chahyun. The fact that the photos had arrived at his house, in isolation, didn’t constitute a significant crime. Without solid evidence, immediate investigation efforts would be limited.Chahyun took a deep breath.Right, nothing has happened yet. This confusion is just because I’m so tired. If I go home, lock the door securely, and rest my weary body, maybe this uneasy feeling will subside a bit…As Chahyun lowered his head, two hands grasped his shoulders and turned him toward their owner. Misha looked into his anxious, trembling eyes and spoke in a serious, low voice. His words seemed to pierce through Chahyun’s heart.“Yuan, come to my place. Stay there.”Yoon Chahyun ultimately couldn’t refuse Misha’s offer.The trembling subsided. However, once the momentary confusion faded and his composure returned, the first thing that surfaced was regret. Truly, he shouldn’t have called Misha. This went beyond the guilt of involving him in the incident.