Kiss the Ground

The day turned to dusk as we drove back home from the filming location. The sky darkened rapidly like ink, and not a single star was visible.As they glided through the dark night, Chahyun kept thinking about the article in the Yellow Post. The more he thought about it, the more absurd it seemed. Psychoactive drugs… He had no intention of obtaining or using them. He even avoided inhaling cigarette smoke, so what kind of drug could it be?Cheap gossip, so-called tabloids, were nothing new to Chahyun. From the moment he decided to pursue this career, he knew his name would escape his control. It was almost routine for his name to be mentioned carelessly by others and to appear foolish in unknown texts. In a few paragraphs, Yoon Chahyun was either a lucky person who somehow secured a striker position in a big English club, a fool getting attention because of his parents, or a promiscuous man who flirted with every woman.However, drugs… Questioning the credibility of the game itself was no longer just a personal issue for Yoon Chahyun. It was too outrageous to be taken seriously.As Chahyun rested his elbow on the window frame, watching the passing scenery, he turned to Misha in the driver’s seat. Misha was looking straight ahead with a slightly subdued expression.“Misha, what did my manager say to you earlier?”“He said to take good care of you. To keep you off the internet and make sure you stay in good condition.”“Ridiculous…”If he puts it that way, what does that make me, who’s older? Chahyun clicked his tongue lightly, and Misha glanced at him.“Are you still bothered? About the article from earlier.”“Not really. It’s just such an absurd content… I don’t think anything will come of it.”To be honest, it didn’t feel real. Although he often brought scandals back when he visited Korea, suddenly being accused of doping in a foreign country was too low of a tactic if they were truly aiming for a dramatic downfall of Yoon Chahyun or Winchester United. Cheon Sungjoo was particularly worried about Chahyun’s soft-heartedness, but he wasn’t weak enough to crumble under such ridiculous rumors.Could anything really happen from just one news article? Would people even care about such things? As he thought this, a serious voice came from the seat beside him.“Yuan, I don’t know how you’ll take this.”It started with a strange nuance. Chahyun looked at Misha with wide eyes. Misha, holding the steering wheel with one hand, was again looking straight ahead.“About the article’s content.”“Yes.”Chahyun had a slightly blank expression. The explicit sentences from the article replayed in his mind. The next clear, unwavering voice hit his ears.“Don’t you think it’s similar to the conversation you had with the reporter last time?”Chahyun tilted his head back blankly. He saw streetlights swiftly pass above the black sky. His mind turning towards Misha felt a bit rigid.“Illya, you mean?”“Yes, don’t you remember the things you said to him after I spilled water on him that day?”“Uh…”What did he talk about with Illya? The conversation after Misha’s sudden mistake was like a cushion to erase the awkwardness. He couldn’t remember the details. He vaguely recalled that topics like documentaries and red ginseng were mentioned. Shortly after that… He was asked if he was taking any drugs…“…”A sudden icy sensation filled his stomach. Chahyun raised his hand to touch his chin and mouth.“Receiving substances likely to be banned drugs from an acquaintance and habitually consuming them… If it is proven to enhance or stimulate performance…”Chahyun pondered each word that came to mind. As he recalled more, his heartbeat gradually accelerated. The strange anxiety collected under his legs and slowly rose to his throat, making his breath slightly heavy.“So you’re saying the stories about me taking drugs and someone providing them all came from our conversation that evening?”“That’s what it seems.”“They wrote about the herbal medicines and health supplements?”“And about your family. That they’re the ones giving you such things.”“Ha, no way…”Chahyun laughed a bit. It was genuinely funny. But Misha didn’t seem to find it amusing at all.“You’re not the type to suspect or be wary of people, but I think the only one who could leak this is him.”“…Misha, but that’s too much.”Isn’t that too much of a leap? You dislike him… He wanted to say, but the words stuck in his throat. An odd mechanism in his heart was sounding an alarm. Was it because he had just heard Misha’s words? Or…Chahyun quickly took out his phone and searched for Illya’s contact. What should he say? Did you write an article based on our conversation that day? He hesitated to speak of uncertain facts, but his finger was already pressing the call button.But even as the ringtone continued, no one answered on the other end. Chahyun waited until the voicemail message came on and called a few more times. Amid the endlessly ringing tone, only Chahyun and Misha’s gazes quietly met. Even though it wasn’t hot, sweat was dripping from the hand holding the phone.***Three days before the second match, it rained from the morning.The gray sky bore no trace of last evening’s beautiful sunset. The saying that the sunset predicts rain the next day seemed to hold some truth. In the car parked at the center’s parking lot, Chahyun quietly looked up at the raindrops hitting the window.“Yuan, are you okay?”“Ah, yes.”Chahyun, slightly flustered, looked at Misha. Misha, with one arm on the steering wheel, was looking at him with a somewhat worried expression. Lately, Misha’s words to Chahyun were mostly about concern and worry, but today the source was clearer than usual.Illya hadn’t answered the phone since last night. He tried calling again this morning, but the only response was the endless ringing tone, giving no sign of connecting to a person. Once, twice. Each time the unanswered call ended, a small lump formed in Chahyun’s heart.Had Illya really done such a thing?When Misha first told him, Chahyun’s initial reaction was denial. He thought it couldn’t be true, but as more time passed without any contact, his feelings shifted to growing anger, and by morning, it had turned into doubt.If Illya had really done such a thing, why?But thinking about it didn’t change anything. It only made the person in front of him worry. Chahyun didn’t want to make Misha more anxious, so he forced a playful smile.“Don’t worry, I’m fine.”In response, Misha silently grasped Chahyun’s hand tightly, at an angle low enough to be hidden from view outside the car window. After a few seconds of secret contact, the two entered the club center.Inside, the building had the quiet atmosphere typical of a rainy day. They walked up the stairs, where the sound of rain echoed, and down the long hallway to the locker room. If it were just a drizzle, they might have trained outside, but today’s downpour was too heavy to dismiss with enthusiasm. Indoor training was likely on the agenda.The hallway was mostly empty, perhaps because everyone was preparing for the upcoming away match. Upon reaching the third floor, Chahyun greeted the first staff member they encountered.“Good morning, Carly.”“Oh, Yuan…”“There’s a lot to take care of today with all this rain.”“…Yes.”But Carly only gave a half-hearted nod and quickly disappeared down the hallway. What was that? Chahyun glanced at Misha, who seemed just as puzzled.They approached the locker room. Inside, it was already bustling with the presence of teammates who had arrived and were changing clothes. Chahyun and Misha, who had spent private time in the car, needed to change quickly as well. Chahyun activated the sensor to open the door.“Hello.”The lively chatter instantly ceased as if someone had turned off a radio. More than twenty pairs of eyes simultaneously focused on the two standing at the entrance, particularly on Yoon Chahyun.“…”It was a strange atmosphere. Not a good one. The feeling of being stared at by teammates, half undressed and paused in their actions, gave a peculiar sense of alienation.“What’s going on?”Chahyun’s question broke the silence in the eerily quiet locker room. Just as he was about to speak again, unable to stand the strange stillness, Jude, who was standing deep inside, rushed over and grabbed Chahyun’s arm. He gave Misha, who was standing ominously behind, a silent glance before quickly pulling Chahyun out of the locker room.“What’s going on? Why are you doing this?”“Just follow me.”Jude hurried down the hallway as if marching. Only after they reached a secluded area far from the locker room did he let go of Chahyun’s arm.“Seriously, what is it? What’s with everyone today?”“Do you really not know?”“Know what?”His voice naturally rose. The overlapping confusion from the inexplicable situation burst out. Looking at Jude with a frustrated expression, he saw Jude frown as if he couldn’t understand either. But it was Chahyun who was left speechless by Jude’s next words.“The Yellow Post! Don’t you check the internet? The doping allegation article about you!”It felt like being hit on the back of the head with a hammer. Words he didn’t expect to hear now.“Why…?”Chahyun looked down at Jude with his mouth slightly open, ready to voice his frustration. Jude’s expression twisted with discomfort, and he whispered to Chahyun as if sharing a secret.“It’s causing a stir. The article hit the internet last night and seems to have become a controversy overnight.”“And?”“Apparently, they want to verify its truth before the match. Your doping allegations.”Chahyun stood there, unable to respond, his mind blank. Jude moistened his lips slightly with his tongue before continuing.“So the committee members came early this morning. They’re in the medical center right now.”“Committee members are at the club? Just because of one article?”“It seems the public reaction was intense… Since it’s an important time, they couldn’t ignore it. Showing up unannounced is their protocol. You know there’s been suspicion since the Brongham match.”It was an incomprehensible situation. The words of Cheon Sungjoo, saying it was all about striking first, echoed in his head.Do they really think the doping committee would act on such a low-tier tabloid? Do they really believe Yoon Chahyun would take performance-enhancing drugs, accepting psychoactive substances from someone?“Alana came to the locker room earlier and asked to send you to the medical center as soon as you arrived. They said the test couldn’t be delayed any longer.”Jude’s voice sounded almost calm. Listening quietly, Chahyun slowly opened his mouth. What emerged from his parched throat was a plea of innocence he hadn’t expected to utter even that morning.“Jude… it’s not me.”“I know! Idiot. Who doesn’t know that?”Jude punched Chahyun’s shoulder with an angry face. It was a familiar action. The heavy pain transmitted through his body felt like ordinary routine, but Jude’s next whisper shattered that illusion completely.“Just go. There’s no other choice right now.”Knowing it was genuine concern, Chahyun couldn’t say anything. Jude, seeing Chahyun unable to hide his confusion, scratched his forehead with an even more troubled expression.***Chahyun stood in front of the medical office. Unlike the noisy locker room, the inside of the white door was filled with an eerie silence. An unnatural quiet, indicating that everyone inside wasn’t speaking a word.As Chahyun reached out to open the door, it opened immediately, as if anticipating his move. Standing there was Alana. Upon seeing Chahyun, her eyes widened briefly before she stepped outside, not giving him a chance to enter. Through the briefly opened door, he glimpsed three or four unfamiliar faces.They were strangers to him, but Chahyun instantly knew their affiliation. The impassive gazes fixed on him unmistakably belonged to members of the doping committee. Alana quickly shut the door and stood in front of Chahyun. Seeing a familiar face, he immediately voiced his questions.“Alana, I don’t understand what’s happening. Why do I need to be tested again?”“Yuan.”“Is it really because of that article from yesterday? It’s just a rumor!”“I know it’s hard.”“No, it’s outrageous! I had a doping test after the Brongham match… there should’ve been results from that, but now this,”Listening to his complaints, Alana suddenly fell silent. Seeing her steady gaze, Chahyun realized he was directing his anger at the wrong person.“What… does this even mean?”His voice gradually slowed and then stopped, like a faucet being turned off. Shame and self-reproach enveloped him.“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get angry… I’m sorry.”Chahyun covered his face with both hands. He could try to think of the doping test as no big deal. He just needed to provide whatever samples they asked for—blood or hair—and it would be over. The controversy would die down in less than a day. But what was troubling his mind now wasn’t that simple.Yoon Chahyun’s pride was hurt. He couldn’t stand the thought of his skills, sincerity, and efforts being doubted by such a trivial trick. Why did he have to prove his innocence against someone’s malicious intent? Why did he have to assert his innocence because of baseless suspicion? Why didn’t they believe the obvious truth…?It was then that a gentle touch on his arm interrupted his thoughts. The team doctor’s voice, controlled and calm, echoed in his ears.“Yuan, it’s okay.”“…”“Everyone in this club knows you’re innocent. We’ve all seen how hard you work.”“…Yes.”“No one is forcing you to take the test. If you don’t want to, you don’t have to. I’ll tell them you refused.”Alana looked at him with sincere eyes. Her short blond hair swayed calmly behind her neck.“But if you refuse, I can’t guarantee you’ll be allowed to play in the next match. The club will decide, but you need to choose now.”Chahyun felt his energy drain away.The public wants tangible proof, not just silent trust. Saying “there’s no way” or “he wouldn’t do that” is useless nonsense. The world’s eyes are demanding solid evidence of Chahyun’s innocence.Slowly lowering his hands from his face, Chahyun looked at the doctor who was likely carrying guilt that wasn’t his to bear. He didn’t want to cause unnecessary distress to others at this moment.Chahyun glanced at the floor for a moment, then nodded slowly and followed him into the medical office.The committee’s doctor, after getting signatures on several consent forms, wrapped a long, round band around Chahyun’s arm. As soon as the sharp, thick needle touched his arm, bright red blood appeared. It flowed through a transparent, long tube into the collection device. Watching his own blood being drawn, Chahyun remained silent.After the blood draw, Chahyun signed various documents. The papers, filled with complex technical terms, mostly confirmed that the subject voluntarily agreed to the test and accepted the results.Without further words, Chahyun completed the forms and moved to the waiting room adjacent to the medical center. The so-called waiting room was more like a private room in a large hospital. Equipped with a bed and bathroom, it was a place for players to stay during times like this. The only difference from a hospital was that a committee member stood outside, monitoring Chahyun constantly. This part felt like a holding cell.“What is this even about?”Chahyun sat on the bed, staring at the white wall in front of him. As he let out a long sigh, the inside of his left arm throbbed. A white bandage covered the puncture site.Alana, who had helped him stop the bleeding, told him he couldn’t go home today. Blood tests, although accurate, took longer to yield results. As a result, Chahyun wouldn’t be released from the center until the following evening. It was absurd and harsh, especially at a time like this.However, they didn’t confiscate his personal belongings, such as his phone. Checking his phone with a frown, he saw a message from Cheon Sungjoo. There were a few missed calls and a long message.▶[…Things have gotten complicated, so I’m heading back first. I’ll see you before the finals, so don’t worry too much and stay strong. Keep your head straight, especially in times like this…]It wasn’t surprising. Given that Chahyun had to take a separate test, it was natural for him to get busy. As the media manager, his top priority would be preventing the rumor from spreading back home.What would happen to the commercial he shot with Misha? Would it be useless now? Even though they had many outtakes, they worked hard on it.Chahyun fiddled with his phone. He wanted to contact Misha. But Misha, who was in training, probably didn’t have his phone with him.His body slowly leaned back onto the bed. If he had to stay here until tomorrow evening, he wouldn’t be able to participate in the last team training before the match. He wouldn’t be able to attend the final seminar in the morning… Just as he closed his eyes to push away the overwhelming thoughts, his phone rang with a familiar tone.“…”Startled, Chahyun checked the screen. It was his younger sister. Seeing the caller, he felt a strange sense of unease.“Hello?”―Oppa.The ominous feeling was right. His sister never called him “Oppa” in such a formal way.“Yoon Chana. What’s wrong? Isn’t it night there?”―Yes. …I just called to see if you’re okay.“I’m fine…”Everything was far from fine. And the timing of this call was eerily precise. Chahyun paused for a moment, then quickly continued.“They found out about it there, didn’t they?”―……“Tell me. Chana, did that article reach over there too?”The voice on the other end hesitated to respond. But Chahyun could easily guess the reason. The cruelest aspect of such nasty rumors was that, inevitably, family would come across them. The people around them wouldn’t just leave them unaware.It was painful but expected. Chahyun lowered his voice and spoke clearly.“It’s okay. These things happen sometimes. It’s the end of the league, so things are noisier. Don’t worry too much; it’s nothing serious.”―Oppa….“If people talk too much around you, just avoid using messenger apps or the internet. Don’t take it seriously and ignore the insults.”Every word he spoke was advice he had heard from Cheon Sungjoo. But now wasn’t the time to be comforted by someone else.“You must be really scared. Worried that something might happen.”―……“I’ll be done with this soon, so don’t be afraid.”He heard a faint rustling of clothes from the other end. It was a slight noise, but it distressed Chahyun. He worried she might be crying. Though her concerns were different, she had a tender heart, much like his own. But just as he was about to add a few more words of comfort, his sister spoke something unexpected.―Oppa, um… Mom…It felt as if all the blood had drained from his body. Chahyun’s hand holding the phone stiffened.―Earlier, a lot of reporters came to see Mom. They came to our house.“What?”―They said they needed to talk to her… They asked if she knew about the article about you and if she was involved.His mind and vision went blank. His hands and feet felt cold, as if frozen.“So… what happened?”