Kiss the Ground

“Who is this? The famous man from Winchester FC’s number 12, who is now in a relationship?”As Yoon Chahyun entered the club training center locker room, he cursed his astonishing misfortune upon encountering Jude Ingram. It was expected to meet someone from the same club sooner or later, but this was too fast, even for Chahyun. There was no time to prepare mentally.Chahyun stumbled into the locker room like a child who had made a mistake. However, the fact that Jude’s locker was right next to Chahyun’s was another cruel twist of fate. While Chahyun fumbled with his hands, missing a high-five, Jude looked at him with a stern expression, resembling a judge at the entrance.“Heh, hey, Jude…”“What shameless liar mocks someone with no shame?”“…”Jude’s sarcasm was as sharp as a defense attorney handling a criminal case. The contrast between his intense choice of words and the cold tone represented his discomfort. Unable to find the words, Chahyun closed his mouth like a guilty person.Even while unbuttoning his shirt to change and sitting on the dressing room bench to put on workout socks, Jude remained silent. Chahyun felt as if he were being whipped with a thorny whip rather than just sitting on a bench. It was incredible to feel such guilt without having done anything wrong.Before he knew it, Jude had changed into his workout clothes, standing in front of the locker and putting on indoor sports shoes. Watching Chahyun, who finished changing clothes almost at the same time, it seemed like an awkward situation, but the connection formed over a long period of shared breaths didn’t seem to disappear.Chahyun, bending over and tightening the shoe laces, looked at Jude with a slightly awkward dilemma. Waiting for him to finish preparations in such an awkward situation would make him seem too hesitant, but leaving for the gym first might annoy Jude.In the meantime, Jude, who had finished all his preparations, threw his remaining clothes into the locker. Watching his intense gesture, Chahyun took a deep breath and realized that he needed to confront and resolve the issue, whether it led to a fight or a resolution. As the saying goes, it’s better to strike first even if you’re going to lose.Being a constant companion, if they didn’t resolve the conflict now, this agony would surely last all day, or even longer. Chahyun blocked Jude’s path, who was about to leave the locker room with a cold face.“Jude, I’m really sorry for not saying anything. It wasn’t intentional… There were circumstances.”“What circumstances?”“It’s a very complicated…”Jude squinted his eyes even more. It seemed to make his mood more uncomfortable rather than soothing it, but there was no other way. Explaining the situation required more determination.“Anyway, I’m sorry. I mean it.”Jude looked at Chahyun in silence for a while. As the quiet silence began to get on Chahyun’s nerves, Jude’s calm voice resonated.“You’re upset because you think I’m angry just because you’re dating someone.”Well, isn’t that partially true? Chahyun glanced at Jude’s expression without much thought and quickly looked down. Whether Jude noticed Chahyun’s unspoken words or not, he narrowed his eyes.“Of course, that’s part of it! You, just a month ago, were calling me your soccer ball lover!”“…”“But what angers me more is that you didn’t just escape from being single; you hid that story from me.”“…”“Am I so pathetic that I couldn’t even talk about it? Afraid I might get jealous?”“It’s not that…”“And imagine how I felt hearing about Yuan’s problems from someone else’s mouth.”“Jude…”“I’m really hurt this time. It was really bad of you.”From the intimidating face just a moment ago to a completely different, truly lonely expression on Jude’s face, Chahyun felt like a deer caught in headlights. The situation was bizarre enough, being scolded for something that didn’t happen, but Jude’s appearance seemed genuinely hurt.Moreover, Jude’s comment about not being able to share even one secret hit Chahyun’s feelings accurately, coincidentally or not. There was indeed something he couldn’t bring himself to say.“I’m really sorry. I know it’s painful. I would’ve felt the same…”Chahyun awkwardly grabbed his arm.“Let it out, Jude.”“… It’s over. There’s no need to drag it out.”Jude sighed as he looked at Chahyun, who was now only looking at the floor. Perhaps seeing Chahyun’s softened demeanor, Jude’s heart seemed to soften a bit too. His human nature, which couldn’t stay angry for even a day, was the factor that brought Jude and Chahyun closer than anything else. Jude, who had been silent for a moment, opened his mouth with a much more relaxed expression.“So, how long have you been dating?”“2, 2 weeks… or so?”“So, what you told me a month ago wasn’t a lie.”“Yeah.”“Is she Korean?”At the sudden specific question, Chahyun rolled his eyes. If he says she’s British, Jude might suggest bringing her to the center at least once. Blocking such possibilities seemed like the better option.“Uh, yeah…”“Then, when you went to Korea last time?”“Uh, yeah. That happened.”“Nice!”Jude slapped Chahyun’s shoulder suddenly with a proud face. If he sets his mind to it, he’ll do anything! Despite the annoying expression, Chahyun’s spine was covered in cold sweat. Lies tend to snowball the more you tell them… Adults are never wrong. Now that Jude’s heart seemed almost melted, he finally stood next to Chahyun.“But it’s been a while since you stopped hanging out with Misha, right? I saw you yesterday, and it seemed like you were keeping secrets from each other.”“Is that so?”“Yeah. I know you can’t drink vodka and about your girlfriend problems…”“Well…”“And did you take her home well?”“It was a bit challenging.”“Did you sleep at the doghouse because she was mad? I saw you at the front earlier, and your whole body was covered in dog fur.”Having already forgotten the terrifying scolding, Jude laughed heartily. Worried that he might touch a nerve again, Chahyun quietly went along, leaving the locker room together. Truly dynamic.After resolving the conflict with Jude, Yoon Chahyun thought he had roughly overcome the major hurdle, but the true aftermath began as soon as he left the locker room.Even in the midst of undergoing regular tests to measure strength, endurance, and jumping ability, Chahyun could feel fleeting glances directed at him from somewhere. Whenever he turned around startled by this eerie sensation, Aloys and Winston were always there, pretending to have casual conversations…Standing beside them, Leroy, unlike them, had an endlessly sad expression. But that made things worse for Chahyun, triggering guilt as if he had committed some grave offense against him.He couldn’t bear it out of fear. Kids, I’m just like you! I’m also struggling in this harsh world… He wanted to shout that, but Chahyun was currently a voiceless person. He messed up a visual test due to being distracted by persistent gazes, leaving training coach Martinez bewildered with a puzzled expression. Worried that it was on the level of a 10-year-old child.When he threw himself into strenuous training, he could forget about such pressures to some extent. But when mealtime arrived, the situation changed again.“Yuan, you have a girlfriend now. That’s really nice.”Sitting at the table with scrambled eggs, Chahyun almost choked on his drink when he heard someone whispering in his ear. Lucy looked at Chahyun with a playful smile and secretly nudged the plate in his hand against his side, as if sharing a secret rendezvous.It wasn’t unexpected that such an incident would happen in front of the most talkative players at Winchester FC. However, the speed at which the news spread was beyond imagination. If they knew about everything from the club’s cafeteria to the staff room’s main dietitian… Just how far had it spread? Despite receiving a dessert from Lucy as a rare gift, Chahyun couldn’t taste anything.When even Doctor Alana, who came to check on the players’ condition, smiled faintly at Chahyun, he finally realized. At the very least, dating within the team in this lifetime was out of the question… He never had any intention of actively pursuing it in the first place, but now that it had come to this, he felt strangely conflicted.***After enduring numerous intrusive comments, Chahyun returned to the dressing room feeling several times more exhausted than usual. Mental exhaustion was far more draining than physical exertion. It was the same with matches. Playing for 90 minutes and winning was less tiring than playing for 20 minutes and losing.While the players finished training, showered, and changed clothes, Chahyun collapsed on the dressing room bench like a wet butterfly. His teammates, clad only in towels, teased him playfully, but he had no energy to respond, so he just scowled menacingly.In the morning, Misha, who arrived at the club with Chahyun, parted ways at the front desk to go to a different floor. And since then, they hadn’t crossed paths once. She sat silently on the left passenger seat like a silent masterpiece.Thinking about their last conversation made his chest feel heavy. Strictly speaking, all of Chahyun’s recent hardships were his own fault.“Now I should just forget about it…”Absentmindedly reaching into his pocket, his hand touched his phone. Whether it was from last night or this morning, the sensation of holding his phone, which he carried everywhere, felt like it had been a very long time, perhaps because there had been no messages. Chahyun raised his phone to check the accumulated messages, expecting inquiries about the well-being of friends and family, colleagues’ life updates, and intrusive messages from a rude media outlet that managed to get the direct contact number of a player. Among them, there was one noticeable message.▶ [Player Yoon Chahyun. I’m glad I could help. I’m busy now because of the deadline XD. How about returning the handkerchief during a meal this weekend? I won’t charge for the interview 🙂 — I.P]It was a reply to the message he sent to Ilya yesterday evening. The use of emoticons like XD and 🙂 by an actual person… In Chahyun’s inbox, filled with the rough swear words and consonants of the typical sports players, it was an unusual message. Whether it suited his inbox or not, it caught his eye, maybe because of that.The message arrived this morning when Chahyun was in the middle of training at the gym. Judging by the time gap between the sender and receiver, the claim of being busy seemed true.The weekend was two days away. Despite the important schedule looming, it seemed acceptable to have dinner after training. Where should I go? Should I buy the meal? Where should I go… Lost in thought, Chahyun raised his heavy arm to tap the screen.▷ [Alright. Where should we meet?]***Yoon Chahyun stepped into the agreed meeting place. The restaurant, with its subtle orange lighting, created a comfortable atmosphere. It was a Chinese restaurant that had become trendy among the members of Winchester FC recently. Not only was it easily accessible, but it was also known for its delicious food. Although some players had been there before, there wasn’t a single player who had only been there once.Yesterday, three hours had passed since Chahyun’s message asking what Ilya wanted to eat, and he received a response. Even in the exaggerated world of dramas and movies, the scenes of reporters taking nutritional supplements and working overnight on their articles seemed accurate. Nevertheless, Ilya’s enthusiastic reply, [I want to try the restaurant that players often go to :D], revealed his passion for his profession to some extent.As it was still early in the evening, the inside of the restaurant wasn’t too crowded. Thanks to that, it was relatively easy to spot the silhouette of the person sitting with his back turned at a table inside.“Mr. Park, hello.”“Player Yoon Chahyun! You came early. Please sit down quickly.”Chahyun casually took a seat across from Ilya. Observing Chahyun’s casual attire – a white t-shirt, jeans, and a black baseball cap – Ilya chuckled.“It feels different from when you’re wearing a suit.”Saying so, Ilya’s demeanor wasn’t much different from the last interview day. He still had the same atmosphere, resembling a young eccentric professor, with his black horn-rimmed glasses and white shirt. His impression seemed more inclined towards intellectual pursuits than sports. Well, just like grumpy and silent grandpas who would rush to a local pub for beer when the league games were on, one couldn’t judge someone’s enthusiasm for sports solely by appearance.“Have you ordered the meal?”“Um… no, I wasn’t sure what to get. I waited until Mr. Yoon Chahyun arrived. Do you have any recommended dishes?”“The creamy shrimp here is delicious. It’s trending among the players these days.”“Really?”“Yes. Donobi especially likes it. How long have they been in business…?”“Can I write that down now?”Pulling out a small notebook from his bag on the spare chair, Ilya’s eyes sparkled. It was enough to momentarily divert Yoon Chahyun’s thoughts that had questioned his profession. When Chahyun nodded, Ilya opened the notebook and scribbled something.“Actually, I usually record with audio, but today is a private occasion. I’ll just take a few notes…”“Sure.”While Ilya organized his notes, Chahyun ordered the meal. The staff didn’t seem particularly surprised, noticing Chahyun’s face. Most of the stores around the club, where colleagues always gathered to mark their presence, had a similar atmosphere.The two exchanged light conversation until the meal arrived. They talked about Ilya’s hellish deadline situation and Chahyun’s struggles of attending the training center until the weekend, just before an upcoming match. Sharing difficult experiences rather than good ones did indeed increase intimacy, as some research suggested. As they finished the appetizer-like conversation, Chahyun felt more at ease with Ilya than before.The table fell silent for a moment when the meal arrived. The body that had endured training all afternoon was now appealing for relaxation. Although it was a restaurant he had visited frequently lately, the food still tasted delicious, and Ilya seemed satisfied with the meal.“This is good. There are many Chinese restaurants that serve heavy dishes, but this one is not like that.”“Right? The downside is that they don’t deliver…”“The atmosphere here is nice, so coming here in person isn’t bad at all.”“I’m glad Mr. Park likes it too.”Suddenly, Ilya, looking at Chahyun, lowered his fork.“Actually, my family name is pronounced ‘Park.'”“Really?!”“Yes, really. My father is Korean, so you can call me ‘Ilya.’ We don’t usually address people by their last names, right?”Ah, that makes sense… Chahyun had been vaguely curious, but it seemed impolite to ask such a question on their first meeting, so he had kept the thought to himself. Responding to Chahyun’s puzzled gaze, Ilya added with a slight smile,“Also, I lived in Korea until I was sixteen, so I can speak Korean.”“No wonder… your pronunciation seemed natural when you said my name.”“Is that so?”Ilya smiled proudly. While Chahyun’s compliment seemed to please him, Chahyun secretly sighed with relief. He remembered the moment in the restroom corridor that day when a journalist revealed that he had taken a photo of Misha and Chahyun’s kiss ceremony. He had almost unconsciously blurted out Korean profanity at that moment. If he had uttered even a single curse word, it could have caused a major problem… aware or unaware of Chahyun’s discomfort, Ilya continued the conversation in fluent Korean.“You looked quite tired during the interview, Mr. Chahyun.”“Did it show? I was a bit tired, but…”“You looked very tired.”Ilya seemed to enjoy using Korean more than the content of the conversation. It made sense; Korean wasn’t a language you could casually overhear in the corners of a store without intentionally lowering your voice. With a playful narrowing of his eyes behind his glasses, Ilya continued,“By the way, I think my guess was off.”“What are you talking about?”“Your relationship with Asplund.”The orange light reflected in Ilya’s glasses, glinting brightly. For some reason, Chahyun fell silent, feeling as if he were being seen through. The silence was loud, as if Chahyun were waiting for a response.“You said there’s no discord. You mentioned it back then.”“I didn’t believe it.”“…”“But after watching the interview, I understand now. ‘Discord’ isn’t the right word. You wouldn’t passionately think about someone you dislike that much.”Chahyun absentmindedly gripped the glass of lemonade in front of him. This was about the comments Misha made during the interview.He could have just said, “Yes, we’re closer than we thought,” and brushed it off. However, realizing that the person in front of him had witnessed everything, including him avoiding Misha in front of the restroom, he missed the timing to respond casually.It felt as if everything was laid bare. Chahyun suddenly became uneasy. Yet, the current unease was different from what had dominated him until now—worries about the aftermath of Misha’s sudden actions and the awkwardness among teammates within the club.Strangely, this uneasiness was about Misha Asplund’s well-being. A concern that, in this moment, something private about Misha might be revealed through Chahyun.Chahyun worried that, by some chance, the journalist might discover Misha’s personal orientation through him. He became unexpectedly frightened at the thought of a journalist with his profession finding out about Misha’s private affairs. Beyond a kiss on the field that could be dismissed as an incident, if Misha’s private situation were to be exposed…Chahyun didn’t want to make Misha feel that way. It was a very unfamiliar emotion.“Is this a formal interview? Usually, those are arranged through the agency.”In response to Chahyun’s direct question, Ilya momentarily looked at Chahyun and then dropped his shoulders, as if he had collapsed. The piercing gaze disappeared as if someone had turned off a fluorescent lamp. He genuinely lowered his eyebrows, seeming apologetic.“I wouldn’t do that… I have a habit of constantly asking and poking around. I keep getting pointed out, but I’m not good at fixing it.”“I try to avoid personal stories.”“Um… I’m really sorry if I upset you. What I really wanted to ask was something else.”Ilya’s expression, as he spoke weakly, seemed a bit desolate. It didn’t seem intentional. Chahyun felt a bit awkward, thinking he might have overreacted a bit. It was likely a result of recent events and the synergy created by Ilya’s profession as a journalist.“What did you really want to ask?”“It’s about the open training day next week. I plan to cover that too. I thought getting information from the players in advance might help with the article composition…”“What if Ilya spills the club’s secrets in advance?”“I’m not that obsessed with achievements! I mentioned back then that I prioritize journalistic ethics.”“Hmm…”As Chahyun brought the lemonade glass to his lips and played with his thoughts, Ilya sighed pitifully. Even though he was already prepared with a notepad and pen in hand, he seemed troubled.Suddenly, Chahyun remembered how Ilya had deliberately shifted the difficult topic during their recent interview. Although he didn’t suspect it, he felt a bit uneasy around Ilya, who seemed somewhat cautious. Chahyun nodded subtly.“Okay. I’ll answer only what’s allowed. Go ahead and ask.”As soon as Chahyun finished speaking, Ilya’s eyes lit up again. That gaze was truly a professional habit. Chuckling to himself, Chahyun responded calmly to the waterfall of questions.***Chahyun settled into his car parked behind the restaurant. Ilya, who had interrogated Chahyun with numerous questions until the end of the meal, quickly grabbed the bill, claiming it was for the interview. Just before leaving the restaurant, as Chahyun handed Ilya’s handkerchief back, the two shared a laugh about how unpredictable the situation had been.Ilya offered his best wishes to Chahyun just before parting. There were many familiar faces among journalists, but there were few people close enough to share a meal with. Despite feeling a bit unfamiliar, Chahyun didn’t dislike Ilya, who was passionate and intellectual about his work. The fact that their nationalities were similar also had some influence.The appointment was around five o’clock, but by the time it ended, it was well past nine. Ilya wished Chahyun well before leaving. Although there were many journalists whose faces were familiar, there were few people he felt intimate enough to share a meal with. It was somewhat unfamiliar, but Chahyun didn’t dislike Ilya, who was passionate and intellectual about his work. His nationality, similar to Chahyun’s, also played a role to some extent.It was around nine in the evening when the appointment ended, and when Chahyun hurriedly drove his car home to prepare for tomorrow’s schedule.Having parked his car in the garage, Chahyun quickly approached the entrance. He planned to comfort the dog, eagerly waiting for its owner’s belated return.It was when Chahyun grabbed the handle to open the door that he noticed something brown protruding from under the entrance.“A bag?”Chahyun looked down, lost in thought, as he gazed at something unnaturally placed in an improbable location. After all, the mailbox was installed near the fence, far from the entrance. The only fence door to approach the entrance was firmly locked until Chahyun’s return.Why would a postman with broad audacity bother to come all the way to the entrance and push mail under the door? However, in this neighborhood, there was no culture of trespassing into someone else’s residence without permission.Chahyun raised his head and glanced around. Due to the spacious gaps between houses, the surroundings were silent. Only the trees planted in the garden rustled in the evening breeze.Chahyun slowly bent his waist and touched the envelope stuck in the gap under the door. Whether it was forcibly wedged or not, it took a little time to pull it out. The bag he pulled out with effort was about the size of B4 and slightly thick. It had a unique texture that didn’t feel like thin paper or documents. Chahyun flipped the envelope back and forth, then lifted the front, where the sender and recipient could be marked.There was only one letter written on it.「1」One? Chahyun frowned at the letter that seemed to contain no information. Contemplating whether to open it right there, Chahyun held the envelope and first entered the house.“Ginseng, were you good? It’s pretty late, huh?”As he took off his shoes with a sigh, a large dog jumped out of the bedroom. Although he had been controlling the amount of feed a bit due to weight concerns, Chahyun had no intention of putting him on an evening diet, so he hurriedly ran to the dining room. As if complaining of hunger, Hong-sam whined and busily followed him.“Alright, let’s eat.”As soon as Chahyun placed the bowl filled with feed on the floor, Hong-sam stuck his nose in. Watching him eat hastily, Chahyun stroked the dog’s back with a sense of apology.Once the urgent matter was resolved, the bag left on the table caught Chahyun’s eye. It was slightly crumpled on the outside, squeezed into a narrow space. Chahyun, taking off his hat, approached the table with care.Seeing the envelope with no recipient’s name in his hand, Chahyun’s sudden and eerie imagination came to mind. It was somewhat childish and creepy—a letter sent containing a virus for bioterrorism. Opening it could result in catching the Black Death or the plague, as often depicted in movies. The situation was creepy enough for him to unconsciously imagine such things. He briefly considered whether to tear it apart or simply throw it away, but curiosity about the contents lingered. From the touch alone, it didn’t seem to contain unknown powder or devices.