Knowledge and Power: Reincarnated Into A Society That Only Values Strength.

 

I always knew there were no human races. Humanoids that were entirely different. While I was still learning about the world I was taught about several different species, but they never felt real to me. Now though, before me was an Oni with glowing horns and eyes.

 

My curiosity got the better of me and I reached out to touch the point, almost pricking my finger. “This thing could really impale someone… It must be a handy secret weapon. Are they hard enough to block too?”

 

“Impale?” He looked worried and flinched back. “Uh yeah, they're harder than my bones…” He let out a small sigh. “So you really aren't scared then?”

 

I reached up to scratch my head, letting out an embarrassed laugh. “Sorry, guess I should have asked before touching them. Why would I be scared though? You look nothing like Bhaltair so it's not like you could be a real demon anyway.”

 

“What?”

 

I was fully aware my logic was a bit off since Bhaltair was technically human, not a demon, but as far as I was concerned actions were the only thing that showed who you were as a person. Judging by his actions during our duel, he was a terrifying opponent. If I had to fight him again I very well may have been terrified.

 

I looked down, to the side. ‘We aren't fighting anymore though, and he seemed sincerely apologetic about not stopping sooner, he even went as far as treating my arm.’

 

when his eyes had that crazy intense fire in them I did feel fear, but as he was at that moment I didn't feel threatened at all. Looking back up at him, his appearance had changed.

 

His hair had become even more spiked and prickly, reminding me of a porcupine, and heavy black marks covered the sides of his eyes and the back of his jaw just under his ears. His skin visibly hardened and lost a shade of color, looking more gray than tan.

 

‘It seems there are a lot more about Oni that are different, besides just their horns…’ I felt my smile soften. It was exciting, but I couldn't imagine his appearance was something to be celebrated… At least not where we were. Why else would he be hiding it? “Thank you for showing me… But if it's supposed to be a secret you should change back.”

“Uh, right.” He placed his hand to his face like he did before and his appearance slowly changed back, refreshing the other questions I had in my mind. “Magic!” I tried to hide how giddy I was at the sight of it. “That was magic, right? Do you know more?”

 

If he knew magic it meant he could teach me. It also meant he could explain a few things. I knew it was technically banned, but even my father used it. So long as I never got caught, I would be fine.

 

“I do, but I'm confused. I was told magic was pretty heavily frowned upon here.”

 

The giddy feeling I had instantly left and my smile fell to the ground. “Yet you're using it in broad daylight all the time.”

 

“Sorry.” He chuckled.

 

“Whatever.” ‘I guess it was too much to hope for. He would get in trouble too if we got caught.’ “It's fine… it was still exciting to see your horns. I've only ever seen people that look human.”

 

“How do you know about the Oni? Most people just assume we are demons.”

‘I figured there was a reason he was hiding the way he looked…’ “I read about it in a book. I never thought I'd actually meet one though. Hey, listen. I know you can't show me magic now, but you better do it before I die OK.”

 

“Before you die?”

 

“Yep, or before you turn into a monster whatever that's about. You can't turn into a monster until you show me magic, and I can't die, got it?” 

 

‘It's a silly promise, and one I'm having him make before he even knows what all it means… Still’ I looked into his eyes, his disguise didn't fully hide their glow. ‘Maybe I'm just being selfish, trying to give myself more reasons for trying to help me make it through…’

 

I suddenly heard a light-hearted laugh and he held out his pinky. It was true that it was a childish promise. I felt a little silly for coming up with it, but I would take every excuse to keep going that I could. It seemed like he could use something to keep him going too. At the very least it helped calm my nerves about the next day's training.

 

I never knew what the weight of a promise truly felt like, but in that moment it began to feel like I couldn't die, it just wasn't a possibility, not until he showed me more of what magic could do.

 

Of course. Eventually, we had to go our separate ways. He went back to the barracks, and I had to go back to the main house. The moment he stepped out the cold air seemed to surround me again as the dull lonesomeness set in weight the dark that came after the sunset.

 

I still had the envelope he gave me though, making me feel like I wasn't alone, at least to an extent.

 

I hid it in my dress to avoid unnecessary complications from my family in case I ran into them. I felt like a child guardian, a meaningless secret from her parents as a part of a game. Deep down I knew that it was different though.

 

Bhaltair would likely steal it and rip it to shreds if he saw it, while Mara or my father would end up asking questions I knew I didn't want to answer, possibly taking it away on principle.

 

It had never been a problem before, and honestly, it wasn't something I even cared about, but I certainly didn't have any privacy. That just never mattered until the moment I had something I wanted to keep to myself.

 

As I made it back to the main building, I slowly creaked open the door, hesitating, hoping no one would be on the other side.

 

After walking through, I was simultaneously met with disappointment and relief as I saw my sister Lu sitting at the table. ‘She usually doesn't even bother saying hello. This should be easy.’’

 

We had never been that close. When we were really little, as when I was 5 and she was 3, we would play together. I doubted she even remembered that though, so to her I might as well have been a stranger.

 

We never even acknowledged each other's existence. If we did it was usually to crack a joke about how weak I was. A part of me wondered if she even saw me as her sister, or if she looked at me the same way Bhaltair did.

 

‘In the end, I guess it doesn't really matter.’ I turned towards the stairs to go up to my room.’

 

“Siya wait.”

 

I froze mid-step. ‘What!’ “O-oh, hi Lu.” I said awkwardly.

 

She never turned around, just stared at the table in silence, like she wasn't sure what she wanted to say.

 

After a long pause, I decided to speak up, trying not to sound awkward again. “Did you need something?”

 

 She stood up and turned to face me as if Mara’s words were echoing in her head too. That was the first lesson I remembered her ever trying to teach… Always look someone in the eyes when you are speaking to them.

 

“You…” She paused again. “You look better in rags.”

 

The whole situation was too strange for me to actually feel insulted. She looked like a little girl trying to overcome embarrassment as she told a boy that she loved him.

 

I stared back at her as she struggled to maintain eye contact. “Oh, ok.”

 

She continued staring at me in silence.

 

“Was that it?” She looked like she wanted to say more, but for some reason, nothing else was coming out.

 

Eventually, I started to feel awkward too, just wanting to leave. “Well. If that's it I'm going to go to bed.” I turned away.

 

“Siya!” As she yelled my name I turned back around, but she was still silent.

 

‘I guess she's still just a 12-year-old girl. One that grew up in this family… She probably just can't express herself very well...’ I walked over to the table and got up in one of the chairs. “Ok, I'm here. Let's talk.”

 

She looked me dead in the eye. “I don't have anything to say to you.”

 

My brow furrowed. I wasn't so much annoyed as I was confused. ‘What is she trying to tell me? Whatever it is, I'm not going to get the message if she doesn't have anything to say… “Can I leave then?”

 

“Please don't.”

 

I settled into my seat, feeling like I would be there for a while. There were things I wanted to ask her too, but I was too afraid. ‘Afraid… Is she scared to talk to me too?’

 

She continued staring at me, refusing to say anything else. ‘Think about it she's only a 12 year old right? Mara isn't exactly the most caring mother, and even if she was, she spends most of her time training me.

 

‘Father is never around either, Bhaltair is barely human, and Airside is just about the most indifferent person I've ever met. Of course, she would have her own issues… Growing up in that environment.’

 

‘She doesn't want to talk, but she doesn't want me to leave either… Maybe she's lonely.’ “It's ok to not like being alone, Lu.”

 

Her eyebrows moved together. “That's not it.”

 

‘Ok, maybe she isn't lonely.’ “So what is it then?”

 

Her face turned a light shade of pink, just barely noticeable.“It's you…” It was obvious she was struggling to get the words out. “I wanted to be with you.”

 

It was a sweet moment, but one that only confused me more. “Oh, ok.” ‘So, she doesn't think I'm a loser?’

 

Her brow furrowed as all the tension in her seemed to finally begin to bubble out. “You're kind of puny, and you're weak, and stupid, and a loser.”

 

“Oh…” ‘So she does think I'm a loser?’ I was starting to get the feeling she was even confusing herself.

 

She gritted her teeth. “I don't understand you at all, you know that? I don't know anything about you. We aren't even family, just two random people that live in the same house.”

 

She slammed her hands on the table and stood up. “I wanted to know what I thought about you, and now I do. When you die, I won't cry at your funeral.” I saw her whole stiffen, like a coiled spring that was ready to snap. “If we even have one.” She muttered.

 

I still wasn't sure exactly what to think. Her words were harsh and cold. I definitely didn't enjoy it, but they felt like lies, even if they were true, hearing them from such a young girl softened them. ‘Twelve-year-old girls exaggerate things all the time. Maybe this is no different…’

 

Memories of me and my sister from Earth flashed through my mind in vivid images. ‘Suzuki… was I this much trouble for you?’ There were a few times I had yelled at her, but she never yelled back, at worst she would flick my forehead.

 

I stood up and we continued staring at each other. Slowly raising my hand up, I flicked her, just like how my sister would. I wanted to tell her she shouldn't talk to family like that, that she didn't have to say hurtful things, even if they were true, but there was no point. In the end, our values probably didn't line up at all.

 

There was one thing that she was wrong about though. “Whether you would cry at my funeral or not doesn't matter… Because I'm not going to die…”

 

She was left dumbstruck as I walked away, starting to shake as soon as I got out of her sight. ‘I can't believe I just did that! She could snap me like a twig if she wanted.’

 

Taking a moment to breathe, I sat back against a wall, sitting on the floor. Her words echoed through my mind. ‘I guess she doesn't see me as family either…’ I expected it, but even so, those words hurt more than I thought they would.

As soon as I got to my room I sprawled out on my bed and stared at the letter Zu had given me. The flare seemed to have disappeared, and the butterflies had vanished along with it. ‘What are the odds that this says the same thing.’

 

I laughed at how ridiculous that fear was. Still, it lingered ever so slightly.

 

Even if that was the case, I felt so numb to the world at that moment that I wasn't sure if I cared. I opened it, pulling out a gemstone necklace and a small letter.

 

[

You are Siya

 

I know now why you didn't return my solute the day that we meant. I didn't want to embarrass you so I thought this would be better, for both of us. I still fully believe you are worthy of my respect, so I will not retract that action. I will continue to wait until the day you feel worthy enough to return my respect, and will continue to better myself to be worthy of it.

 

There is one other thing. I would watch your back. I can sense a deep sadness growing within your house… The kind that only appears before someone does something that cannot be taken back.

 

My people have a saying. If you use rage as your fuel, you will go mad, if you use desire as your fuel you will stop the moment you experience pleasure, but if you are fueled by belief then there is nothing you cannot do.

 

Stop trying so hard to reach a goal that was forced on you. You can't touch the sky just because you're told to, but if you yourself believe, you'll be able to steal the stars.

]

 

I wasn't surprised at the idea of me being in danger. But he used the word sadness. The fact that the person felt that emotion meant that Bhaltair was ruled out for sure. I also found it unlikely that Airsidh was even capable of that either. He seemed numb to everything.

 

It didn't really give me any hints, but the necklace was cool. ‘I wonder if this counts as a love letter? It even has a poem in it.’ I laughed at the thought of receiving such a thing. Respect and love were two very different things.

 

I took a closer look at the necklace, it was dark purple, the same as his eyes and horns. 

 

I placed it directly in my line of sight so that it was the only thing I could focus on and used my magic to scan it.

 

[Oni soul stone: A precious artifact that can be used in mysterious ways.]

 

I quickly turned off the ability before it went haywire again. ‘That was useful… So it nearly kills me if I use it too much, and it doesn't even always give me information…’ 

 

The annoyance somehow replaced all of the darkness I felt after talking with Lu, and in the end, after that I just gave up and went to bed, deciding to wear the necklace in case the mysterious ways ended up helping me somehow.