Marvel: I Have A Super USB Drive

Just a Quick Note: I don't own any of the characters, worlds, or universes mentioned here (aside from a few original characters). They all belong to their respective creators and companies.

This is a work of fiction, created simply for fun and inspiration. No offense or infringement intended.

***

'Atta boy,' Joe smirked mischievously as his cocooned body hung suspended, subtly swinging back and forth. The situation was so perfect, so similar to Lara Croft's starting dilemma in the Tomb Raider. The problem was, for the love of him, the inability to moan in every situation. 

'Um, that's sexist. Lara is just doing what Lara normally does. I should leave her out of my current... quagmire.' He lightly chuckled internally before refocusing on the sticky strands restraining him completely. 

Though Joe could have easily avoided his current predicament by dodging Peter's webs, he chose not to. Instead, he pitied Peter and allowed himself to be caught, sacrificing his pride to ease Peter's distress. 

"Not so scary, are we? How's the taste of the medicine I've given you?" Peter smugly tapped his head, irritation on his face, as he allowed his body to slide down through his thick web in an upside-down position. 

'I don't wanna taste your stuff, bro. Especially when they are something sticky...' Joe thought, recoiling in disgust in his mind. He didn't dare to open his mouth. Even if he wanted to speak, the voice would come out muffled and incorrigible. 

All in all, Joe had immense respect for Spider-Man's webbing formula. Peter had developed it back in high school, likely concocting the breakthrough in the chaos of his messy bedroom.

"Cat got your tongue?" Peter said in a mocking voice as he tapped Joe's totally wrapped-up form, making him swing like a pendulum. 

'The audacity of this sneaky bastard. Sigh, why did you have to act so smug, Pete?' Joe's lips twitched, suppressing a smile as Peter swung him back and forth. His eyes gleamed with barely contained mirth, even as he maintained a facade of helplessness.

"Joe, don't dream about escaping from there until I've vented enough." Peter swung along with Joe's pendulous momentum. It was a comical scene. 

"♪Spider-Man, Spider-Man... ♪" Peter whistled his phone's ringtone as he reveled in the ridiculous moment. 

'How typical.' Joe nearly facepalmed himself but could not do so because of the strong web. He tried to shift his body parts, but the webbings were quite elastic, somehow adapting to his movements. 

"Interesting. The tensile strength is around 120 pounds per square millimeter. Its molecular flexibility is remarkable, and it even can absorb small amounts of kinetic energy. If he ever got his hands on vibranium and reverse-engineered its unique properties, I can't begin to imagine what heights he'd reach. Using just synthetic polymers alone, he's already achieved so much." Joe mused, fascinated by the intricate composition of Spider-Man's webs.

'So these webs once temporarily restrained a blood-lusted Hercules in one comic issue. I reckon even the Hulk got stuck by Spider-Man. Hmm, they are quite durable.' Joe once again experimentally flexed his arm muscles, feeling the resistance. The webbing strained against his muscled arms. 

'Pete, you're strong, but not strong enough. I'm your father, just like Arlecchino. You'll never be able to oust me.' Joe's lips curled into a one-sided grin as he prepared to break free from the cocoon. A butterfly was meant to fly freely, not remain trapped. Metamorphosis was a force that transcended nature's constraints.

Joe had already metamorphosed once. Going through the second phase wasn't that bad, right? 

Joe methodically tensed his muscles, feeling the illusory omnipotent power course through his body. With his current strength, he really felt he could lift even the Mjolnir or support the skies. 

'Just kidding, I'm not worthy.' 

The familiar pulse of muscles contracting, gathering raw power, filled Joe with the sudden urge to just unleash the beast of destruction within him. Joe curbed those hidden primal urges and concentrated on getting out of the 'sticky' situation first. 

BOOM! 

In one thoroughly calculated attempt, Joe forcefully tore the webbings, splattering the fiber remnants all over the lab. 

"Holy moly—" Peter's jaw nearly hit the floor as he reflexively moved away from Joe, who perfectly landed on the floor. 

'How can he be that strong?' Peter narrowed his gaze as he agilely crawled on the walls. 

"O.M.G, did you just… do a superhero landing?" His eyes dilated as he gawked at Joe's majestic form. His thoughts tended to be all over the place, especially when he experienced a series of jaw-dropping situations. However, the cliched landing wasn't the most important thing at the moment. Peter had a lot of questions to ask Joe. Curiosity got the better part of him. And there was nothing intense like rubbing the Peter tingle. 

"Uh-huh." Joe casually nodded as he rose from the ground. 

"I apologize for making you shit your pants. My bad." He dramatically performed a praying gesture, a deeply apologetic expression plastered on his face. He fully embodied that emoticon hashira named Gyomei. 

Peter's lips twitched at the unnecessary theatrics. Joe's verbal apology was enough to make him sideline the horror prank. Leaping off the wall, Peter gracefully landed near Joe. Peter's curious eyes never left Joe's body as he constantly sized him up. He eyed his muscles like the most fascinating thing on earth. 

Joe instinctively took a step back, his brows furrowed. "Stop with those creepy eyes, bro. You're making me uncomfortable.' 

Peter smiled in embarrassment while pinching his nose. 

"I-I didn't mean... sorry about that. I'm not gay," he stammered awkwardly.

"It's normal to be gay for me, bro. I know I'm flaming hot like hell." Joe's lips cracked into a cocky grin as he stretched out his hand and patted Peter's shoulder. 

"The hell?" Peter's face twisted in confusion, a skeptical look settling over his features.

'What's up with this dude?' The thought flashed through his mind, followed by a cringe.

"Ew, no homo." He made a face, trying to shrug Joe's hand off his shoulder. 

Peter's eyes widened in surprise when the hand didn't budge. He stretched out his hand, applying just a hint of pressure, careful not to use too much force. Even now, he worries about accidentally hurting Joe.

'Still not moving?' His thoughts raced as he glanced between the hand on his shoulder and Joe's smug face. 'I didn't expect him to be this strong.'

"We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Which one do you choose?" Peter said, dropping a cliché like it was fresh.

Joe sighed, shaking his head in mock disappointment. "Seriously, man? Can you update your one-liner repertoire? I'm cringing for you."

Joe disengaged his hand, deeply embarrassed for Peter. 

"What—?" Peter froze like a statue, mouth agape. For a moment, it felt like the ice age had returned. 

Thankfully, he recovered a few seconds later, his earlier fascination with Joe's superhuman feat overriding that embarrassingly awkward moment. One slip-up couldn't easily turn off the switch in his head.

"Anyway, tell me—how did you tear my webbing apart like tissue paper? Wait, did something radioactive bite you? Or maybe you used a bioelectric disruptor to weaken the tensile strength? Are you like... Captain America?"

Peter excitedly circled Joe, firing off questions nonstop as he scrutinized him from every angle, like a photographer searching for the perfect shot.

A thick black vein pulsed at Joe's temple, followed by a low, dark chuckle.

'I forgot what kind of person Peter is—a curious kid. Funny, since I'm just as childish in my own way,' Joe sighed softly, trying to calm his irritation.

He figured he'd have to indulge Peter's burning curiosity, if only to quell it for a moment.

"Alright, I'll talk, but only if you stop buzzing around me like a fly," Joe said, his tone patient but firm.

Peter immediately stood at attention and zipped his mouth. 

Joe pulled the office chair closer and settled into it comfortably. "So... I've been working on a few things, and finally…" He paused, ready to enlighten his close friend. He was eager to expand his perspective on the limitless potential of science before addressing the crucial matter at hand.

***

[word count 1371]

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