Overlooking Your Eyes

It wasn’t that Yeong-won disliked making friends, but ever since his family’s financial situation had rapidly deteriorated, he found it difficult to form meaningful connections. He felt uneasy about the possibility of someone asking to visit his home, with its glaring foreclosure notices plastered on their furniture. And once he realized how crucial studying was for his future, he had thrown himself into it entirely, leaving little time to socialize.

Kim Hyun-jin was the first friend he made after becoming isolated in middle school, his days filled only with studying. While Yeong-won studied, Hyun-jin would sit nearby, reading comics or playing games. Even in the poorly ventilated one-room apartment, Hyun-jin would eat three packets of ramen and then leave five more behind for later. A friend who knew all his circumstances and didn’t interrupt his studies, Hyun-jin was enough for Yeong-won. He didn’t feel the need to make new friends, unwilling to go through the time-consuming process of building trust and understanding from scratch.

That’s why Yoo Seon-woo’s overt kindness made him uncomfortable. He didn’t know how to handle someone who openly extended their goodwill and stepped so quickly into his space. Moreover, the idea of an unplanned variable like Yoo Seon-woo disrupting the carefully laid plans for his future was unwelcome.

“……”

As he watched Seon-woo toss the empty carton into the trash bin at the back of the classroom, Yeong-won turned his attention back to the front as the door opened. It was better to look ahead than to glance back. And he found it much easier to lower his gaze than to look up.

Greeting the math teacher as he entered, Yeong-won opened his workbook. When the teacher announced it would be a self-study session, his mood lifted instantly. Without hesitation, he dove into his workbook, quickly solving problems with unwavering focus. Everything was back to the way he preferred it, progressing exactly as planned, without the slightest disruption.

***

Chewing on a crispy piece of pork cutlet, Yeong-won glanced at Kim Hyun-jin, who had been giving him a suspicious look for a while now. Hyun-jin wanted him to confess how he and Yoo Seon-woo had become close, but there was nothing to say.

“Even if you keep staring at me like that, there’s nothing to tell. What I said earlier is everything.”

“No, seriously. The way he looked at me earlier, it was like he was telling me to get lost.”

“Why are you exaggerating? He was just saying goodbye.”

“No, dude. I’m not exaggerating. You know that vibe, right? Where if I asked why he looked at me like that, I’d just look like an idiot? But something definitely felt off.”

As he ate a bite of stir-fried potatoes and ham, Yeong-won shook his head. Hyun-jin was great, but his tendency to fixate on things and analyze them to death was, if anything, his biggest flaw.

“He even tried to give you the bread while we were together. You said no, so it’s like he just gave it to me as an afterthought.”

“Come on, it wasn’t like that. I said I didn’t want it, so he asked you next. In order. Stop overthinking it and just finish your food. Don’t come crying later about being hungry.”

“Ugh… there’s something going on. The way he talks to you and the way he talks to me, it’s different. Even the way he looks at you. I feel like I’m the clueless guy who barged in between you two.”

Even while taking a big bite of rice, Hyun-jin kept speculating. Watching him, Yeong-won took a sip of clear soup, his gaze shifting past Hyun-jin’s shoulder to where Yoo Seon-woo sat. Maybe it was because they were now in the same class, but he seemed to notice Seon-woo far more often today than before. Every time he turned his head, Seon-woo was right there, it was odd, almost uncanny.

“Do you know who Yoo Seon-woo hangs out with?”

Hyun-jin, who had polished off his meal in just five spoonfuls, turned his head in the direction of Yeong-won’s gaze.

“I don’t know? Doesn’t he just get along with everyone?”

“That makes sense, right? We weren’t in the same class before, we weren’t close, and we didn’t see each other every day.”

“Yeah, so what?”

“But Yoo Seon-woo knew.”

“Knew what?”

“That you and I are close.”

As Yeong-won’s eyes accidentally met Yoo Seon-woo’s over Kim Hyun-jin’s shoulder again, he quickly averted his gaze. He felt like he’d locked eyes with Seon-woo more times today than he had solved problems.

“Maybe he’s just one of those people who remembers every little thing.”

“…Maybe.”

Though the unease didn’t completely fade, Hyun-jin’s casual tone made him feel a bit better. Taking his last bite of rice and pork cutlet, Yeong-won set down his chopsticks. Glancing at the half-finished food on Yeong-won’s tray, Hyun-jin pushed his water cup closer to him.

“How can you study after eating that little?”

“If I eat too much, I get sleepy. Can’t concentrate either.”

“I could eat two full trays and still be hungry by the end of sixth period.”

“Maybe you’re the weird one.”

“Ugh, why do I eat so much and still not grow taller? I want to be as tall as Yoo Seon-woo.”

Taking a sip of water, Yeong-won slid his chair back. Following his lead, Hyun-jin picked up his tray, and the two of them walked toward the waste bins. As they passed by the table where Yoo Seon-woo was sitting, Yeong-won could feel his gaze again. This time, he didn’t turn to look, simply disposing of his leftovers and stepping out of the cafeteria.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

It felt strange to admit he kept making eye contact with Yoo Seon-woo, so he swallowed the thought and followed Hyun-jin to the snack bar. Having already bought a Picnic drink and an apple jam cookie earlier, Yeong-won decided he couldn’t afford to spend more money. If he did, he might have to skip trips to the snack bar for the rest of March.

“What are you getting?”

“Nothing for me.”

“Ugh, you’re so picky.”

Opening the ice cream case, Hyun-jin grabbed a chocolate-flavored bar for himself and a green-grape flavored one for Yeong-won, confidently paying for both before handing it over.

“I got my allowance today. This is on me.”

“Thanks.”

“Who else do you have but me?”

The youngest of his family, with two much older brothers, Hyun-jin was showered with affection and had a natural knack for being playful and endearing. He often said things that others might find cheesy, but over time, Yeong-won had grown used to it, no longer cringing but simply laughing it off.

Smiling, Yeong-won unwrapped the grape-flavored ice cream halfway. The frozen treat was so cold it made his fingers sting. Pulling his uniform sleeves down to cover his hands slightly, he adjusted his grip on the bar. He needed to snap the stick in half, but the ice cream was so frozen that it hurt to apply pressure.

As Hyun-jin, holding his own ice cream in his mouth, reached out to help, another hand suddenly slipped in between them.

Startled, Yeong-won instinctively looked at the nametag in his line of sight. Yoo Seon-woo. Shocked by the name, he looked up, only to meet Seon-woo’s downward gaze.

“Here.”

With ease, Seon-woo broke the stick and handed the ice cream back to him. As Yeong-won stared blankly at the bar, he flinched at the sudden sensation of warmth and cold on the back of his hand. Seon-woo was holding his hand. Startled, Yeong-won reflexively pulled his hand back and hid it behind his body, realizing belatedly that his reaction might have come across as rude.

“You’re not taking it?”

“Huh? Oh…”

But Seon-woo didn’t seem offended. He simply smiled and gently shook the ice cream toward him. Carefully, making sure not to touch Seon-woo’s hand again, Yeong-won took the ice cream.

“And this.”

Lifting the small piece of ice cream attached to the broken stick, Seon-woo brought it close to Yeong-won’s lips. Caught off guard, Yeong-won instinctively parted his lips slightly. It wasn’t a conscious decision, it just happened. The moment he realized what he was doing, the piece of ice cream slid softly between his lips.

“…….”

After confirming that Yeong-won had properly bitten off the cap of the ice cream tube, Yoo Seon-woo finally withdrew his hand. The taste of green grape lingered on Yeong-won’s tongue, and he hurriedly pulled the tube out of his mouth and pressed his lips together. The background noise around him seemed to flicker…now audible, now fading. It wasn’t malicious, nor was it teasing, but something about the interaction felt off.

Why is he doing this to me?

That single thought was all that filled his mind.

“I saw the two of you together again on my way out.”

“Oh, do you want one too?”

As Kim Hyun-jin, half-turned toward the snack bar with his wallet in hand, offered casually, Seon-woo smiled and shook his head. His words, ‘the two of you together again,’ carried an oddly negative undertone.

“No, I’m good. Thanks for offering, though.”

“It’s nothing.”

Despite the gentle tone of his voice, there was something in Seon-woo’s manner that made it clear he held the upper hand in the exchange. The dynamic between the three of them felt unbalanced: one person seemed too composed, while the other seemed overly awkward. Watching their exchange, Yeong-won pulled his uniform sleeve forward to shield his hand from the icy cold of the ice cream. What had been rock-hard earlier had now begun to melt slightly, leaving the tube soft and indented.

“Let’s go, Hyun-jin.”

Breaking the silence, Yeong-won spoke up, sensing that staying any longer would only lead to more awkward and meaningless conversation. He considered telling Seon-woo they were leaving but decided against it. There was no need. They hadn’t come here together; they had merely crossed paths. Once they separated, things would naturally return to the way they were.

“Huh? Oh… yeah.”

Yeong-won glanced at Hyun-jin, who was fidgeting nervously, unsure of how to act around Seon-woo. He couldn’t understand why everyone seemed to defer to Seon-woo like this. Was it because of his family background? Because teachers liked him? Because he was rich? While those might be reasons to envy him, they didn’t seem like reasons to lower yourself or act overly cautious.

“See you in class.”

Seon-woo’s kind farewell was paired with a gaze that fell momentarily on the hand holding Yeong-won’s ice cream, its knuckles peeking out from under the sleeve of his uniform. Feeling self-conscious under Seon-woo’s gaze, Yeong-won reflexively curled his fingers inward, hiding them further within his sleeve.

The ice cream tube in his hand felt freezing, as if it could burn with cold, yet the gaze resting on it felt strangely hot. The contrasting sensations were unsettling, almost surreal. Without glancing back at Seon-woo, Yeong-won lowered his hand further, tucking it behind his body. Only then did Seon-woo’s gaze slowly lift and rest on his face.

“Go on.”

It felt oddly like permission, like Seon-woo was granting him leave. There was nothing coercive about his tone, but the feeling lingered. Letting out a quiet sigh, Yeong-won finally turned to follow Hyun-jin, sneaking a glance at Seon-woo’s tall figure as he walked away. Even as he left, he kept the hand Seon-woo had stared at hidden behind his back.