Overpowered Idiots

A small boy decked out head to toe in white and blue garb rushed towards the scene. His eyes briefly scanning the crowd of kneeling peasants before landing on Salem. Behind the little magic boy two guards followed, calling out the him, which he continued to ignore.

“Teacher, teacher,” Zane waved his hands wildly in the air adding a little hop to his run as he drew near.

“Oh, fuck me.” Salem whispered underneath her breath.

“You came! I didn’t think you’d be here so soon. Why are over here?” The mage boy slid to a stop before Salem, nearly vibrating in excitement.

“Uhhhhh,” Salem blanked.

“Well, I suppose it doesn’t really matter, but you should really join me over there.” He pointed to the line they’d came from. “Its a quicker entry, and you don’t need to be around these… people.” He didn’t quite sneer at the people still on the ground but more than a hint of distaste slip through.

Salem’s expression hardened. “These people are no less important then you or I, address them with proper respect.” She scolded.

Zane looked briefly confused for a moment, before nodding readily. “Ok.”

“Damn, that was a quick turn around.” Star muttered. “Congratulations on becoming a cult leader.” She stated matter of factly, glancing up at Salem.

Salem whacked Star up side the head.

“Ow.”

“Ehem,” The commander cleared his throat.

“Who are you?” Zane asked as he turned to face the guard, a neutral expression on his face. All his previous excitement gone in an instant.

“The switch up, damn…” Star murmured rubbing the back of her head.

“Commander Jack, I’m in charge of the guards for this sector.” He replied.

“Why are you here Commander Jack?”

“I-”

“Further more why are you interrupting my conversation?”

“Sir, these two have caused a major disruption and attempted to harm a capital commander. I must-”

“Your ugly.” Star interrupted. “And you have a receding hair line, also your forehead is massive.”

“Your eyebrows aren’t aliened either, and your ears are two small for your head.” Salem added.

“I- What?” The commander flinched back, holding his hands over his ear, “They are not-”

“Your foreheads so big a plane could land on it.”

“The fuck is a plane-” He snarled, previous confusion melting off in favor of anger.

“And your teeth look like they belong to a chain smoker.”

“ENOUGH!” The commander finally snapped, unsheathing his sword. “I will-- ACK!” The commander found himself tackled to the floor, sword knocked out of his hand, by the two guards following Zane around.

Star made a bad approximation of a whistle. “Damn, didn’t even let him finish.”

“Commander Jack. You are hereby under arrest for the attempted murder of two mages. One of which that has been named my teacher. You do understand how the implications of this are, correct?” Zane sneered down at the commander looking as intimidating as his 5 foot nothing height would allow him.

“He can do that?” Salem wondered aloud.

“Eva-fuckin-dently.”

“You can’t—”

“I don’t believe I introduced myself yet.” Zane cut him off. “Seeing as your so inept as to not recognize my family crest, I am high mage Zane Wintour, heir to the marquis house of Wintour.” He announced a light show flashing behind him as a sudden gust of wind gave him a dramatic aura.

“Why aren’t you ever that flashy.” Star questioned.

Salem rolled her eyes.

The guard rapidly pales. “I… was not aware.” He tightened as he seemed to force the words out. “I’m sure we could work something out though. I mean, I have plenty of connections and… monetary assets. Perhaps I could assist you in some way—”

“I have no interest in a bribe and no use for your connections. Guards.”

The two guards haled the man to his feet. “Yes, sir.”

“Take him away.”

The guards noticeably stiffened at that, “But sir…”

“I am plenty well protected with my teacher around, I assure you.”

Salem looked a tad miffed at that.

The two guards gave one sharp nod, hesitating for but a moment longer. “We do as you command.” They dragged the man away as he screamed profanities, fighting their grip.

Star hummed, giving a small way goodbye before her hand was slapped down by Salem.

“I wasn’t aware you have the power to make arrests.” Salem turned her focus back to Zane as he positively beamed at her.

“Oh yes, high mages are given quite the modicum of power. Being a marquis heir does as well to a degree. I can make arrest, offer apprenticeships, vote to override ruling alongside other high mages, make arrest, place individuals under investigation and more.” Zane smiled, utterly delighted to show off his social power.

“That quite a bit of power.” Salem pointed out, her expression giving away her mild discomfort for the idea.

“Well yes, mages are relatively rare to begin with. Ones as powerful as I even more so. No kingdom wants there mages to be snatched up by its neighbor, so we’re give more than a few liberties.” Zane explained, give a view vague hand movements in a way that indicated it wasn’t a big deal.

“I see…” Salem continued to be unconvinced.

“I’m surprised your not stuck as one as well, with the power you displayed and all.” Zane seemed to pause slightly at the thought as if he were just know realizing how strange it was they weren’t aliened with any kingdom. “Why aren’t you—”

“We like to travel.” Salem quickly cut him off.

Zane blinked, once, twice, “Oh, ok.”

“You accepted that way to quickly.” Star blurted. Salem lightly elbowed her. “Why must you bully me this way.” She complained.

“I’m not jeopardizing my chances of being taught magic.”

“We don’t even share the same type of magic. How are you so sure I can teach you anything?”

“How do you know that?”

“Your magic types are wind and light correct?”

“And contract.”

“Right, I don’t use any of those magics.”

“Doesn’t matter.”

“It… doesn’t?”

“No.”

“No…?”

“…”

“I don’t think he gonna elaborate.” Star helpfully stated.

Salem scolded.

“Arf.”

“Opal agrees with me.”

Salem let out a long, suffering sigh. “Alright then. Here’s the deal. You get proper guards out here, and also some humanitarian aid, and I’ll teach you magic for the duration of my stay here at the capital.”

“Deal!”

“Good, now Star,” Salem’s tone demanded attention, as she turned to look at Star playing in the dirt with a stick she found.

“Yessir!” Star snapped to attention, dropping her stick.

“Start setting up accommodations for the people still waiting outside the gate. Water, food, and shelter in that order.”

“Aye aye!” Star immediately turned heel and dashed into the crowd, striking up a conversation with the nearest family for a few moments before handing some thing over. The family took it with only mild hesitance before turning to the next person and passing along the information.

Zane watched in mild astonishment as the crowd began to break apart dividing themselves into a few section in the matter of moments. “She is really good at this.”

“Star has a way with and people and on top of that lacks any and all preservation skills. It makes her extraordinary good at convincing people to go along with whatever she says.” Salem explained as the groups made defined shapes, moving away from a center location where Star stood. “She could be a cult leader if she wanted.”

Zane let out a vaguely startled noise a that.

Before he could say anything however, Star’s voice drifted faintly over to the duo. “Ready?”

The crowd gave a murmur, looking on in mixed expressions of skepticism and hope. They watched Star pulled a long case out of her bag. It stood around four foot tall and was only six inches wide. She pushed a little button at the top and the crowd watched with awe as it began to unfold itself revealing a pool of clean water contained in a circular shaped fountain with a statue of a wyvern in the center.

This simple act sent the crowd into an uproar, immediately people began heading toward the water. They cupped their hands to get a drink, splashed some in their face, and simply waved their hand around in it watching in fascination as all the gunky water was pulled to the wyvern and came out the top purified.

“There’s enough for everyone, form a line in front of someone with cups. Everyone will be able to drink plenty.” Star voice carried authority as she used a tone Salem rarely ever heard from her. “No one is going to take this from you, this is not a limited resource. Everyone will get there fill.” She repeated as lines began to form, stopping the initial stampede that nearly broke out.

Slowly everyone began collecting a bit of water for themselves before dispersing to different areas. Every once in a while Star would pull someone off to the side and speak lowly to them before handing that person something and allowing them to leave. This process continued for some time as Salem watched people’s eyes and attention slowly drift away from Star allowing her to easily slip away. She tracked Star’s movements as she began catch the people she had previously pulled asides attention. Watched as they all began congregating to one area where Star began pulling items out of her bag one more.

“….Soooo,” The wizard boy said from beside her, “What are we doing here still exactly?”

“It’ll most likely be a minute,” Salem stated, not bothering to look at Zane. “Star will most likely take a little while longer get food and shelter set up before we go.”

“Right, and where is she exactly? I don’t see her…”

Salem choose not to reply, instead leaning back against Opal. She rested her body weight on the wyvern slowly sinking to the ground, getting comfortable.

Zane’s eyes continued to search the crowd for a while longer before glancing back to where Salem stood. His face turned confused for a moment as he look around, his eyes sliding over her as if she weren’t there at all. “Where did…”

“Down here.” Salem rolled her eyes, taking pity.

Zane’s attention snapped to here, “Oh,” he said rather awkwardly, “I didn’t see you…”

Salem huffed slightly before turning her attention back to Star, by now she’d gotten a long table set up. On the table sat all the things needed to create one very large dinner. Knives, cutting boards, fruits and vegetables, a concerning amount of fish and a few massive pots she’d use on occasion when making massive batches of fish food, or canning, or crafting on one memorable occasion.

“Wait… wasn’t she just…”

Salem’s attention was diverted once more by the annoying mage boy as he forgot where she was for the second time. Really these cloaks were to powerful. Huffing to herself she pulled out a pair of sunglasses and a mask from her pockets. She stared at them for a few moments before mentally deciding fuck it, it was good enough. She slipped the mask on her face and glasses over her eyes before pulling her cloak off, bundling it up in her arms.

“Still here.” She spoke, not bothering to look to Zane.

“ACK!” Zane startled, “I didn’t see you there!” He then whispered under his breath, “How does she keep doing that…”

Salem continued ignoring him.

They continued to rest by the trees for an another hour in relative silence, broken by Zane’s admittedly poor attempts to strick up a conversation. At some point the two guards following Zane around returned, taking there places by his side once more. Salem payed this no mind however, continuing to watch the crowd.

Eventually there was a distinct shift in the crowd, signaling Star had finally finished cooking. This development was preceded by the smell of freshly cooked fish wafting through the air causing many a hungry stomach to growl. Salem watched from her place beside Opal as the crowd began moving to grab plates of food and began woofing them down. Since when did they have this many plates?

Finally, after what seemed like ages, Star made her way back to Salem, yawning. “Nearly done.” She announced, plopping herself down next to Salem and leaning her body against hers.

“Oh yeah?” Salem spoke softly, looking up from where she fiddled with the strings of time.

“Yep, we got enough food for everyone for tonight. Next we just need to get some tents set up, I’ve already got a few people working at that now actually, and then we’ll be done. The fountain won’t run out of water for a few more days at this rate. I’m hoping everyone will be able to get in by the time it runs out though.” She ranted, waving her hands around a little bit as she spoke.

“Is that all then?”

“Mostly, I’m not sure what to do about food though. I gave the people currently serving some for tomorrow as well, just what I had left from canning mostly, and I’m hoping that’ll be enough.”

Salem hummed along as Star spoke promoting her to continue.

“I’m thinking we should see about heading back here to make sure everyone has enough food to eat. This place obviously isn’t sending any aid to these people, and considering this line has hardly moved since we got here I feel the people here are in for the long hall.”

“Hmmm, I suppose, but where do you plan to get that amount of food?” Salem questioned.

“Ugh, logistic.”

“Yes, logistic.”

“I believe I can help with that.” Zane pipped in causing Star and Salem to look to him.

“Oh shit, your still here?” Star blurted out without thinking.

Salem bonked her upside the head.

Zane let out an irritated huff, “Yes, I’m still here.” He crossed his arms, “And I believe I have a solution to your problem.” He drawled.

“And what would that be?” Salem smoothly interjected, keeping Star from blurting out god knows what.

“W-well, I know a place that sells excess food that's about to go bad cheap.” He coughed into his fist, “I can have some brought here.”

“I suppose that could work…” Star thought aloud, “Alright.” She agreed after a few moments of contemplation.

“Right then, I will have it arranged to come here first thing in the morning then.” Zane confirmed, writing something down before handing it to one of the guards, “Take this is to Eleanor.”

The guard nodded before taking the note, “It will be done.” He departed.

“Welp, I best be back to it.” Star announced, sitting up, “I think I can get everything set up in the next half hour or so, then we can go.”

Salem nodded, “Be quick.”

“I will!” Star hopped to her feet, “See you soon.”

Salem watched her disappear back into the crowd, pulling a few people to her as she did setting them to work.

 

 

 

Im back after getting my ass kicked by college and my own mental health!