Quintet for six and a half persons

Vadim and Artem had been friends practically since birth. Their mothers were best friends, having met in school, then enrolling in the same university together. They even interned at a major production company at the same time and were both offered permanent positions there. They shared almost everything, even meeting new boyfriends together.

Their work often involved constant travel, but they made sure to coordinate their trips so that one of them would always stay with the children. From the earliest days of the boys' lives, whenever one mother had to leave, the other would care for both children. Often both boys were fed together, from the breast of the same mother, which made them not only childhood friends, but also foster brothers.

You might think their childhood would be idyllic, full of love and harmony. Yet, life turned out differently. Neither of the boys knew their fathers. Even before they were born, their parents' relationships had been strained by endless business trips, jealousy, and constant arguments. Both marriages fell apart within three years. Shortly after the breakups, each mother discovered she was pregnant and decided to raise her child alone.

Artem's father remarried and started a new family where there was no room for Artem, while Vadim's father moved abroad and vanished from their lives entirely.

As they grew up, the boys often quarreled and harbored jealousy toward each other. When left in the care of the other's mother, it always seemed like the non-biological child received more attention, tastier treats, or better toys. This led each boy to feel neglected, as if they were somehow less loved or not good enough.

When both boys started school, their primary goal became proving their superiority over the other. If one excelled in breaststroke swimming, the other had to master every aquatic discipline. The same rivalry extended to running, jumping—whether it was into something, over something, or onto something—gymnastics, shooting, throwing, and every other activity offered at school. 

The competition didn't stop at sports. They joined the drama club, the solo singing club, and even macramé, home economics, and cheerleading. In all these areas, they stood out as the most striking members, further amplified by their completely contrasting appearances. 

They were never on friendly terms and always ended up in opposing teams, constantly competing in everything they did. This relentless rivalry turned their relationship into an irreconcilable feud that lasted all the way through to graduation. 

Their mothers were thrilled. Their children boasted the highest grades and an impressive collection of awards and medals for various achievements. Teachers constantly praised them, marveling at how intelligent and talented both boys were. Despite the boys' mutual animosity, adults always tried to pair them together wherever possible. They sat at the same desk in class, shared a room at summer camp, and even ended up with adjacent seats at the cinema and theater. For the boys, this forced proximity was unbearable. 

Home became a sanctuary of sorts, a temporary ceasefire where they coexisted quietly to avoid upsetting their mothers. However, all the pent-up frustration found its release as soon as they stepped outside. They'd run off to a secluded grove or hide behind garages, where they'd pummel each other with their fists until they collapsed from exhaustion. They avoided hitting each other's faces, knowing full well that visible injuries would set their mothers off on endless tirades. 

At home, they played the part of caring friends, tending to the cuts and bruises they'd inflicted on each other. While patching each other up, they'd slyly press harder on the wounds, just enough to make the other wince in pain, masking their malice as "gentle care." Later, they'd concoct synchronized lies about getting into fights with local bullies, delivering their fabricated stories with such precision that their mothers never suspected a thing.

Nevertheless, they both graduated as the top students in their class, amassing more awards and certificates than anyone else in the school's history—second place was an insult neither could tolerate. 

After graduation, their mothers decided it was time for the boys to live independently. Boys, after all, needed to grow up without clinging to their mothers' skirts, especially in the absence of a father's guiding hand. So, the boys were sent off to the capital, where they enrolled in one of the country's best universities. 

Secretly hoping to never cross paths again, each resolved to choose a career that the other would never consider. Yet, fate—or perhaps some deeper irony—had other plans. Not only did they end up at the same university, but they also chose the same faculty. Their mothers were overjoyed, convinced this was proof of the unshakable bond of their sons' "friendship," blissfully unaware of the silent rivalry still burning between them. 

Entering the lecture hall for his first art history class, Artem froze in his tracks. There, in the very center of the amphitheater, sat Vadim. The sight hit him like a punch to the gut. For a moment, he stood paralyzed, but the worst part came when he realized the only available seat was right next to him. 

Artem couldn't fathom what cosmic crime he had committed to deserve such karmic punishment. The sheer improbability of this coincidence was beyond him. The only consolation was the look on Vadim's face when he noticed Artem sitting beside him. A mix of horror and despair crossed Vadim's features, and, oddly enough, Artem found himself enjoying it. 

It goes without saying that their mothers, ever the schemers, had managed to turn the dorm upside down to secure a shared room for the boys. Their argument? "They're practically brothers!" 

The only way to convince the mothers otherwise was to fabricate romantic relationships. As soon as Vadim officially paired off with his bogus girlfriend, their mothers unleashed their full powers of persuasion on the university administration. After what could only be described as a bureaucratic siege, they succeeded in arranging a significant reshuffle of accommodations, granting their sons two separate rooms with roommates of their own.

Their life of rivalry and jealousy might have continued indefinitely if Vadim hadn't broken his leg in a skiing accident during their second year at university. As Vadim tumbled helplessly down the icy slope and Artem stood frozen at the top, unable to do anything to save his friend, their entire life together flashed before his eyes. In that moment, Artem felt a sudden, crushing realization of how empty and joyless his life would become without Vadim in it. 

While Vadim lay unconscious, his body bruised and battered beyond recognition, Artem was tormented with guilt and fear. Every inch of Vadim's body—his arms, legs, and face—was covered in dark bruises, cuts, and abrasions, eerily reminiscent of the aftermath of their childhood fights. Back then, such injuries were a product of their shared rivalry, something only Artem was allowed to inflict, and even Vadim himself had no right to push his body to such extremes.

For the two long months Vadim was bedridden in the hospital, Artem became his dedicated caregiver. He tended to his wounds, helped him with the most basic tasks, bathed him, applied ointments, dressed his injuries, and rewrapped his bandages multiple times a day. Seeing Artem's tireless devotion, Vadim found himself revisiting the chaos of their shared childhood and regretting how foolish he had been. He came to understand much about their unique bond and, from that day on, resolved never to let petty quarrels divide them again.

Even when both of them fell for the same girl, they reached a silent agreement: it would be better for her to find someone else entirely.

By that time, both of these notorious ladies' men already had steady, official girlfriends and were even living with them. But don't rush to judge them for debauchery—this was a story in its own right. 

From the very first day of university, the entire campus had been "shipping" Dasha and Artem as a couple. It all began when Dasha, overwhelmed with anxiety and terrified she'd fail the first round of entrance exams, broke down in tears. Artem, ever the compassionate soul, comforted her with such genuine sincerity that it was impossible for anyone watching to interpret their bond as anything but romantic. And so, the myth of their relationship was born. 

In truth, they found the arrangement convenient. Together, they maintained the illusion of a relationship while respecting each other's personal lives. For Dasha, a quintessential bookworm in every sense, this setup allowed her to focus on her studies without the distraction or pressure of meeting new guys—something she was too shy to do anyway. For Artem, it only enhanced his reputation as a gentle and caring boyfriend, drawing the attention of a very specific type of girl. These women were intrigued by his supposed commitment, knowing full well that he wasn't looking for anything serious. It was a win-win situation for both. 

But things with Vadim and Anya were far more complicated. Their initial connection was purely casual—an attraction free of commitments. They enjoyed each other's company exclusively in the bedroom, and outside of that, there was absolutely nothing. In public, they pretended not to know each other at all. 

However, a month before New Year's, when preparations for the university's freshman ball began, it became glaringly obvious that Artem was a shoo-in for the crown. This, of course, was unacceptable to Vadim. Determined to win at all costs, he and Anya spent the entire month training and rehearsing dazzling moves designed to captivate the audience and secure their victory. 

At the competition held just before the ball, Artem was effortlessly at ease. There was no need for him to strain or fret. His pitch-perfect ear and lifelong aversion to anything off-key made him a natural singer. Seven years under an extraordinary literature teacher in school had shaped him into more than just someone who could read expressively; he empathized deeply with the characters he portrayed and had grown into a remarkable actor. His love for poetry and his innate ability to deliver verses with heartfelt sincerity only added to his charm. To top it off, his sense of rhythm and musicality made him an excellent dancer. 

He excelled in all three competition segments with grace and poise. Thanks to Artem's calm confidence and unwavering support, Dasha—his partner—also rose to the occasion. Even she had never imagined herself capable of performing so well.

But Vadim knew his rival far too well—without exaggeration, he had been studying him his entire life—and was no less talented in any area. However, Vadim also understood that the crown was much more likely to go to couples who exuded genuine romance. With this in mind, he and Anya leaned fully into their strategy. 

Vadim orchestrated grand spectacles during peak hours: a romantic dinner for Anya in full view of the student body, slow dances in the gym, and, in one particularly audacious stunt, he climbed a frozen drainpipe to the slippery roof above the university's entrance and shouted his love for Anya at the top of his lungs for everyone to hear. Naturally, this nearly got him expelled, but... he was one of the top two students in the class, and the vice-rector ultimately settled for a month of disciplinary punishment. 

Even then, Anya didn't falter. Like a true Decembrist's wife (and, fittingly, it was December), she joined him in scrubbing floors, walls, windows, and even toilets with unwavering determination. Her solidarity softened the heart of the vice-rector, who, after a week, took pity on them. Delivering a stern lecture about how the university was a temple of knowledge, not a dating club, he forgave their transgressions and let them off with a warning.

At the competition, they were nothing short of spectacular. Unlike Vadim, Anya couldn't sing at all, but she whispered the lyrics into the microphone with such sincerity, gazing straight into Vadim's eyes, that the audience melted with delight. During their dance, Anya stumbled through the steps, but at the end, she tripped, and Vadim caught her in a way that turned the mishap into a dramatic and perfectly choreographed finale. Little did anyone know, they had been rehearsing this exact move for an entire month, as teaching Anya to dance had proven utterly impossible. 

In the final round, during the poetry recital, Anya stopped after the first stanza and delivered such a moving performance of being too choked up to continue that the audience was in tears while Vadim finished the poem on her behalf. 

They truly snatched the crown from Artyom and Dasha with sheer determination and theatrics. Artyom was livid, ready to tear Vadim apart in frustration. He recognized every one of those tricks and saw their use as not only unfair but downright underhanded. 

And so, Vadim acquired an equally fake official girlfriend, along with plenty of free time and personal independence.

But after the New Year, things took a turn for the worse. Their group of five unexpectedly grew to six when Valera appeared—a boy hopelessly, head-over-heels in love with Artyom. Valera followed him everywhere, pestered him relentlessly, confessed his feelings at every opportunity, and constantly put Artyom in awkward situations. 

Artyom tried everything—ignoring him, reasoning with him, having heartfelt man-to-man talks, all without resorting to force, of course—but nothing worked. Valera was thoroughly smitten. 

The breaking point came when Valera approached the entire group and, in front of everyone, declared his love for Artyom. In that moment, all of Artyom's friends, as if by some unspoken agreement, sided with the lovesick boy, leaving Artyom to face the battlefield alone. 

"How could you?" Artyom exclaimed indignantly once the girls had escorted the exhausted-from-courage Valera away. "You're my friends! What's wrong with you? Do you want me to date a guy? Dasha! How could you?" 

The entire group burst into uncontrollable laughter. 

"Well, first of all, the guy really deserves some pity," began Vadim in his usual thoughtful tone. "Think about it! Can you imagine how lonely he must feel in this world?" 

"And do you realize how much courage it takes to openly declare your feelings to someone beauty and sexy like you?" Max chimed in, his face the picture of mock seriousness. "Especially in front of such a dazzling group as ours." 

"And look at him! He's so… uh, let's say not the most dashing guy around, right?" Anya asked with a peculiar mix of tenderness and teasing. 

"He must've been absolutely terrified," even Dasha joined in, fanning the flames. 

"Don't ignore true feelings!" Anya scolded, feigning an even sterner tone. "It's cruel!" 

"Don't be such a monster!" Artyom's own girlfriend delivered the final blow. 

The group slowly shuffled away, leaving Artyom to face their mock disapproval alone. 

"You could have done something!" Artem turned to Max, who had lingered a bit. "Maybe you could have gotten his attention?"

"Sorry, buddy," Max replied. "If it was a girl, I would never let you down. With a guy... sure, you can always count on me and my fists. But this?" He sighed dramatically. "I'm at a loss, man. I have little experience... with this gender. I can't hurt him... I can only protect people like him, he's like a girl... so sweet and defenseless." Max continued to mock Artem, with the most sympathetic look.

Artyom stood there, stunned by the collective betrayal. His only way out now seemed painfully clear—he needed to find himself a fake boyfriend.