Reborn as the Spider who bit Peter Parker

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***

Sneaking back home, I quietly pulled a bottle of whiskey from the flower stash and headed for the kitchen. Moral fatigue and psychological burnout were already making themselves felt. Being a parasite, I couldn't get tired physically, but all the worries and stresses were inexorably accumulating in me, literally dragging me to the bottom of melancholy.

Taking a mould with ice out of the freezer, I carefully sent three cubes into my mug and began to lazily pour the alcohol. I wasn't going to get very intoxicated, but at least it would please my taste buds, and in my case, it was more of a psychological ritual to relax than a banal binge.

Old world habits are still weighing on me. And that's okay, because all of them are like bricks that make up the unique me that thinks and realises all my actions and motivations. Each brick is like a part of me, and it doesn't matter if it's a memory of a person, a habit or something else. It's all just one piece of the puzzle that we call our own self. Perhaps, one day, I will master the art of replacing these pieces, but by my own will, and I will finally be able to be the person that I always dreamed of in my dreams and fantasies.

However, all this is secondary, and even the existential crisis is not as terrible as it is portrayed to us. Now we need to think about other things. And it is true - where can we dump so much gold and at the same time not collapse prices on the precious metals market? Of course, you could sell it all for absolute cheap, but let's be honest - neither I, nor you, would go for such a senseless waste of resources and your time. Gold can be melted down, but into what and why? On the plus side, it will be easier to sell, but there are nuances there too.

As they say - greed is the devil's greed. And on the other hand, a couple of tonnes of gold will certainly not be superfluous, and, again, the stockpile does not weigh down the pocket. However, it is necessary to think over how to sell it, because who knows at what moment such a monstrous amount of cash may be needed. What if we sell all the gold through art? False documents that everything is covered with gilding, and after the satisfied client makes a second examination and legalises all samples of art in full value? It could work, of course, but I don't know a damn thing about it, so I need an expert in this field.

It's complicated, and all I did was borrow some gold. I wonder how our criminals were going to legalise such a large amount of gold. Or maybe they already had a client. Now we will not know, because Kulibin ran away, and all his workers silenced forever already I.

If you think about it, my conscience sleeps sweetly somewhere in the back of my mind, and I've done worse things, so it's extremely difficult to shake it. And I don't consider such scum for the best of our society. During my service in Karabakh and Yugoslavia I had time to look at both of them, so a healthy dose of cynicism is always with me. It is sad that the main scumbag has left and now rumours about me will spread. And then the Russian brothers will come too, because I stole a very characteristic toy from them.

Taking a small sip from the mug, I continued to think about eternal things. What to do, who is to blame - this always torments our man with his eternal question about existence. Slightly reflecting, I did not immediately notice the burning look from May, who was spectacularly frozen under the light of the pale moon.

- Peter Benjamin Parker...' she said sternly. - Drinking alone is a sure sign of early alcoholism. - May said more mischievously. - Tell me. - She said demandingly and added her mug to mine.

- I'm tired,' I said honestly. - It's like burnout. Apathy and a complete unwillingness to do anything. - I continued, sipping slowly from my mug. I tossed May two ice cubes and just as leisurely poured her whiskey exactly two fingers.

- Er, no, young man, it's too early for you to burn out. After forty it's the best time, so don't be mopey and melancholy. - May said cheerfully and, touching her mug to mine, sipped her whiskey. - It's strong. How can you drink such filth? It's like young wine from the French lands. What are we talking about? Oh, yeah, you need to get out, kid, and I need you to take Anna Watson's niece to the cinema. I'll take you to a marathon of old shows tonight, cos you're a bit of a mess. - She finished her whiskey in one decisive gulp and winked mischievously at me, saying, 'Don't worry, kid, we'll work it out.

- Hmm. Sounds like a plan. But why do I have to be the one to take this cute little Redhead to a romance every time? I understand everything, but everything has to have limits, I can't get rid of her, and now it's a film. - I tried to be indignant for the sake of appearances.

- Peter, you seem like a smart boy, but sometimes you're such a child. - May smiled. - I'm not going to tell you the obvious truths, though - you should understand. And yes, remember, I'm still waiting for grandchildren...' she smiled wryly.

- May! - I was immediately taken aback by her statement.

- May what? I'm already you know how old May is? For your information, Cousin Garrett and his wife nag me almost every month about Peter and the little Parkers, and they already have three grandchildren. You're lucky I'm as understanding and forgiving as they are,' May glanced at me appraisingly. - But all patience has limits, and sooner or later you'll be asked, my boy. So take the girl to the cinema. Now finish your whiskey and go to bed. But don't worry, we'll marry you off and you'll become a 'normal' person. - May smiled predatorily, and I immediately drained my mug, trying to assess all the prospects.

- A film is a film,' I agreed meekly. - Have I told you how much I love you? - I tried to turn the tables. - So what shows shall we choose for our marathon? And we should probably get some goodies, too. - I kept talking May up.

- And don't think you'll be able to talk my teeth in,' she continued mischievously. - Now let's get to the important stuff. I know you've been missing a lot of nights, so we need to have a serious talk about this, Peter. - May continued sternly. - Richard was also involved in near-legal activities and working for the same group of radicals or terrorists, and Ben was worried about his brother and the safety of the family, hence the health problems. And I don't think your parents were in that unfortunate accident by accident. So please don't make the same mistakes as your father, and share whatever you feel you need to with your family. I will help, even if it's to the best of my ability, but I will. - she said with confidence.

- It's complicated. - I exhaled tiredly.

How could I have been discovered so quickly? However, we live with May in the same house, and it is not difficult. On the other hand, she's right, because who can you trust if not your family? It's just a question of who should be allowed into the 'family,' and that's the hard part.

Those eyes, full of hope and a genuine desire to help, are so comforting. How can I betray them now? After all, she trusts me so much. But will she accept what I'm doing? We'll see. So, I've been there. I'll try to trust her, but only this time and only her. I wonder who Cousin Garrett is. I'm not in favour of an early family, and I'm not old enough to change nappies.

- Start, and I'll try to understand or accept it,' May said sympathetically. - We were all young once, Peter, so maybe I've been through the same things you have. We're a family, and that's what matters. - She smiled sincerely.

- Ahem. Where to start. If I keep it simple, I have a couple of tonnes of gold and I need to sell it somewhere at the highest possible price and launder it as well as possible. - Seeing the pensive look on May's face, I braced myself for the worst. But no hysterics or scandal ensued.

- Well, you certainly surprised me. I hope you did a good job of tying up loose ends. As long as nothing leads back to us. We'll figure out the rest. You know, I just got an interesting order from a friend of ours, Norman Osborne. Well, he wants a new office for his headquarters, where he can host dignitaries. How about ivory, Andalusian marble and a couple of tonnes of gold? Do you think it would be too fancy? - she said thoughtfully.

- You really are a criminal genius,' I smiled and hugged May. - It's nice to have an architect in the family. Knowing old Osborne, he might appreciate this approach to the main office. - Finally releasing the embarrassed Mei from the hug, I smiled again.

- I'm just looking after my family, as any woman should. And you think about the children. One day I might agree with Garrett, and he'll find you a bride, ignoring your opinions and desires. We'll consider the gold settled, and I won't even bother asking where you got it in such quantities. All bureaucratic issues will be solved through the branches of the Chinese company TVEA for a small sum. Well, and the whole delivery, I think, can be entrusted to you. - she smiled like a fox and yawned sweetly. - And now to bed. - May said mischievously again and took the bottle from the table.

- You're the best,' I hugged her again. - I don't know what I would do without you, May.

- See? Family helps each other. - She smiled and hugged me back. - And now - quickly to shower and sleep, tomorrow we have a Friday marathon, - brazenly breaking the cosy hugs, I was categorically sent to the shower, to which, however, I had no objections.

- Good night. - I whispered tiredly as I went into the shower.

- Sweet dreams. - came back to me.

Pensive under the contrasting shower, I tried to understand for what merits I was given such a beautiful woman. After all, this is the first time I've seen something like this, or maybe I was just fatally unlucky in my previous life. Who knows? But damn, family's cool, no toxic relationships, it's fucking idyllic. It's really about not bringing anyone home, so I'm gonna have to get a better disguise. An oversized suit is good, but a regular mask won't hurt either, so we'd better minimise the risk of identification.

I wouldn't mind a Stark-like mask - a tactical interface and an AI of my own would not be superfluous in my game, and in such a mask I'd rather be recognised as an Iron Man fan or an impudent imitator than as an ordinary scientist and student.

As I contemplated my new goals, I almost subtly noted that the moping and melancholy were gone. Indeed, the best medicine was work and thinking about the plans to come. I grinned at the banal solution, then grabbed a towel and made my way to the bedroom as leisurely as I could, because May was right, and there was so much more to come.