Spring Winds

"Ehmm... " Ahh, the sun is so nice out today…

Perfect weather with only wispy clouds above and the sun smiled down upon me, bathing me with warmth. Senior Sister's subtle sounds flipping through pages of her book accompanied the soft murmur of the wind.

What perfect conditions to take a nap, ah.

Shifting my body, I tried to get a better position so that the sun wouldn't be shining into my eyes every time the breeze decided to shake the branches above.

Ah, truly, it's a struggle.

"Why do you keep moving?"

"I'm trying to avoid the sun. It keeps getting in my eyes."

I heard a sigh escaped Senior Sister's mouth. "Then why don't you just pick a different spot?"

"Hmm, I like laying on your lap.

It's comfortable." The feeling of Senior Sister's fingers running through my hair while she read her book felt nice and comforting. And even though that spot wasn't exactly ideal, just having this small treat was enough to make me stay.

"Sigh.

You're so silly." Senior Sister remarked with a smile in her voice. "Fine.

Enjoy it while you can. I can't stay here long."

"Eh? What do you mean?"

Opening my eyes, I looked up at Senior Sister's face for answers. However, I couldn't meet her eyes as she appeared to be looking at something far off in the distance.

Her eyes light up in a sparkle that I've never seen before. Her cold and stoic face bloomed like the most radiant flower as a loving smile appeared on her lips.

Sitting up, I tried to see who she was looking at. However, I couldn't make out the face.

Senior Sister called out their name with glee, but I couldn't hear it. Everything seemed to be drowned out by a deafening noise.

It was as if I was underwater as it became hard to breathe as I saw her run-up to the faceless person.

Jumping into their embrace, I've never seen Senior Sister look so happy. It was as if she were looking at her whole world…

As if remembering my existence, Senior Sister briefly looked back with a smile. I couldn't hear her words, yet her lips read simply 'farewell…'

"Wait, Senior Sister…" Trying to get up, I wanted to go after them before they disappeared from my sight. However, I found that I couldn't even move.

My legs have lost their function as I remained rooted in place. The tree roots started to tangle themselves around my legs as if trying to drag me down.

Tugging at the rough root, I wanted to free myself to no avail. "Wait, don't go, Senior Sister!"

My hands started to glow red from the friction, as I could only watch them slowly drift away, Senior Sister clinging to her partner's arm.

Tears started to blur my vision as the roots around my legs grew tighter. "Senior Sister, please!

Wait for me!

D-don't go…"

Perhaps something worse than the pain of the roots was the intense ache of my chest as Senior Sister didn't even bother to turn around…

"S-senior Sister!"

As if someone was holding my head underwater, I found that I couldn't breathe as my vision started to fade.

Stretching my hand out, I fruitlessly tried to grab her fleeting image as the tree pulled me closer to its body. "Senior Sister, please don't leave me!

You promised me you wouldn't leave!"

---

"Jing Ran, snap yourself out of it!"

Someone lifted me from under my arms as my head finally broke the water's surface. Gasping for air, my heart pounded rapidly, and my head became dizzy as the air started to pump through my lungs.

"Jing Ran, what happened to you?" Master's voice became clearer as my breathing became stable. I could see Master leaning over me with worry in his eyes through the curtain of wet hair.

Eyes drifting around the small room, I could see that I wasn't in a blooming flower field anymore, but rather the bathhouse's room.

"I'm… I'm fine…" I managed to squeeze out. My throat hurt from talking as I swallowed too much bathwater.

"Yeah, right?!

I came to check up on you, and what do I see? My disciple is trying to drown herself in the bathtub!"

"I wasn't trying to drown myself…

I was just trying to practice that new mediation method that you taught me…"

"That's supposed to be in a controlled environment! You're not ready to practice this new technique unsupervised just yet!" Master scolded as he piled warm towels onto my cold frame. "This meditation method is very intense and can only be done by those experienced enough in the basics.

You have only started today!" After seeing that I was alright, Master started to light the brazier in the bathhouse's corner, bringing warmth to the cold room.

"Aiyah, this master leaves you for one second to get towels, and you cause this much trouble already.

Hah, I can only imagine the struggle that your senior sister faces daily…"

---

Laying in bed, I watched the moon through the cracked window that Master let me keep open. After hours of nagging, Master finally left to who knows where. Regardless, at least it allows me to have some quiet peace again.

That crazy old man… He worries too much over a silly girl like me.

The shining silver disk shone a soft white light through the cracks, making the room look less gloomy in my solitude.

"The moon looks nice tonight…" Snuggling deeper into my quilt, I tried to tuck my feet closer to my body as they grew cold.

F*cking spring weather.

So unpredictable.

One minute it's warm and sunny; the next, you're covered in ice.

As I tried to get some shut-eye, my mind kept drifting off to thoughts of Senior Sister. No matter how hard I tried, it seems like my mind was like a labyrinth, with each path leading back to her.

What the heck is this?

It wasn't like this before. Tossing around, I eventually laid on my back, facing the blank bamboo ceiling above. My mind began to wander off again, leading me back to that dream, no, the nightmare I had earlier.

It wasn't like anything that I've seen or felt before. It was as if someone had plunged their hand into my chest before mercilessly ripping it out.

However, the pain dulled, and even recalling it didn't hurt as much as the first time.

Like a bad memory, the less I think about it, the less it will hurt.

Senior Sister is allowed to like anyone that she wants…

I have to stop being such a burden to her. It will only weigh her down from going after what she wants…

Like Master says…

Senior Sister is already dealing with many responsibilities; I shouldn't have to be another one on her list…

My eyes started to feel heavy as my dry eyes began to sting, and my throat grew tight.

Maybe if I just stop thinking about her, then it will hurt less…

---

Senior Sister looks beautiful.

Standing off the side, I watched as various women fussed over Senior Sister as they made sure that nothing was out of place.

Dressing in a red embroidered bridal gown, Senior Sister sat in front of the vanity mirror, with her phoenix crown[1] carefully balanced high on her head.

"Lady Hua, you look stunning!" One of the faceless women gushed.

"Yes, yes! When your lover sees you, I'm sure that they will fall for you once again."

"Ehmm! Sister Hua looks like a fairy descending from heaven!

Your partner is fortunate to have met a woman like you!"

The women continued to fuss over minute details before they eventually left.

The bridal carriage was going to arrive soon.

"Junior Sister," Senior Sister called out as she turned around and smiled at me. "What do you think?"

"I…" Words could not describe what I thought. Those words that those ladies used to describe Senior Sister's appearance could only scratch the surface of who Senior Sister looked.

Heck, Senior Sister could be wearing rags and sticks for hairpins, and I would still say that she was more beautiful than some heavenly fairy.

But, who am I to criticize them if I couldn't even find the right words.

"You… you look good, Senior Sister…"

"Oh? Just good?" Senior Sister smiled with a teasing tone. "You usually have more to say than just 'good.'"

"Hah, well, those are the only words that I think of at the moment."

"Haha, I see."

"Em…" Darting my eyes away, I couldn't bear to look at her any longer as a whinge of jealousy arose in my heart.

They don't deserve Senior Sister…

However, my ugly thoughts are meaningless. After all, they were the one who Senior Sister chose.

Not me…

"I heard that you're leaving. Is that true?" Senior Sister asked.

"Uh, yeah…" Scratching my head, I tried to think of an explanation. "I'm trying to advance my skills, so I'm leaving the central plains.

I hope that by traversing the world perhaps, it will expand my outlook…"

"Haha," Senior Sister started to giggle. "This takes me back. I remember the days that I had to force you to sit and learn.

To think that there would be a day that you would go out and seek more knowledge by yourself."

"Hah, I suppose people change... " Focusing my time and energy into study cultivation and other techniques is a good distraction. "I can't stay like that foolish girl forever... "

"Shame.

I actually quite liked your silly self that clung to me. However, nowadays you seem to have matured very quickly.

Haha, I suppose it's about time for a young girl like yourself to grow up."

"Ehm, yeah." My mind raced in anxiety as I took notice of the fleeting time which had left. "Senior Sister, I just have one question for you."

"Em? What is it, Junior Sister?"

"When did you realize that you were in love?"

"W-when I realized that I was in love?" Senior Sister started to blush profusely. Before, I would've taken great pleasure seeing her like this.

However, knowing that it was for that person, it only left a bitter taste behind.

"Well, it was back when they had saved my life. I didn't think that I would've managed to come home that night; however there they were, staying by my side throughout the entirety of that harsh night.

From then on, my eyes would follow them subconsciously. Before I knew it I had fallen in love.

Haha, I just never dreamed of them accepting my feelings!"

"Oh, I see…" My hands curled themselves into tight balls, as my nails created tight crescents into my palm. "That's… that's quite the love story…"

"Em!" Senior Sister nodded as her face grew only redder.

From the distance, I could hear the marriage procession's music start and the cheerful chatter of women coming closer.

It seems like my time with Senior Sister has come to an end.

"Then, I shall wish you and senior brother-in-law a blissful and long-lasting marriage."

"Thank you, Junior Sister.

You don't know how much that means for me to hear that."

Soon the doors of Senior Sister chambers opened as the maids came flooding in. Carefully placing on the embroidered bridal veil that Senior Sister tirelessly worked over, a dragon and phoenix pair adorned the red silk.

Following her out, I watched as Senior Sister was escorted out the gates before stepping into the extravagant bridal carriage.

I suppose I don't need to worry about Senior Sister's well-being with such an expensive show of things.

Lifting up the flip of the carriage window, Senior Sister gave one final wave farewell.

And then she was gone.

[1] phoenix crown - Fengguan is a traditional type of Chinese headgear for women. It was worn mainly by noblewomen for ceremonies or official occasions. It is also traditional headgear for brides.