Sunshine Shower

Due to the aftermath of drinking while being in a physically and mentally battered state, Moon Seoyoon was sick the entire weekend. When he drank with Nam Taeun, he thought the wound was bearable, but it seemed it wasn’t something that could heal so easily.Meeting someone and drinking together after a long time briefly soothed his tattered heart, but Moon Seoyoon wasn’t feeling any better at all.“Is it normal for a guy to be turned on by another guy?”The disgusted expression and the contemptuous voice spitting out such filthy words constantly haunted his mind.“Little puppy, do you want to go to the hospital?”Moon Seoyoon barely managed to lift his eyelids. In his blurry vision, Nam Taeun was looking down at him with a worried expression.“I’m fine. I usually get like this when the seasons change. It must be because I drank yesterday too.”“You weren’t this sick when you were in the army.”“Maybe I’m suited for the military.”Nam Taeun frowned as if just thinking about it was horrific.“At least take some medicine. I bought some while I was out.”“I’m fine…”“Hey, if you don’t take it, I’ll pretend I don’t know you when I get sick.”It was an empty threat. Still, it lightened his mood a bit, so Moon Seoyoon weakly smiled as he tried to sit up. His whole body ached with even the slightest movement, like he was suffering from a severe cold. It felt as if his entire skin was bruised and sore where it rubbed against his clothes.As he barely managed to sit up against the wall, Nam Taeun unexpectedly placed a small table on the bed. Why is there something like this in the dorm? Even though he was sick, he couldn’t help but blink in surprise.“What’s this?”“I brought it to comfortably drink with my roommate. It’s uncomfortable eating on the floor.”“Do you know you’re a really weird person?”“Live life your own way, Seoyoon. Eat some porridge before you take the medicine.”It turned out Nam Taeun had bought a container of porridge from a shop, not just from a convenience store. He even handed Moon Seoyoon a spoon like a grandparent would.Even in this situation, he thought of Woo Yeonjae. If Woo Yeonjae knew he was sick, he would have stormed into the dorm immediately. He might even insist on taking him to his apartment, claiming that living with others is what’s making him sick.“I’m actually a bit touched that you bought porridge.”“Convenience store porridge tastes awful. When I’m sick, get me the expensive stuff too. That’s why I bought it.”“Thanks for the meal.”Even though he had no appetite, he felt he should eat a few spoonfuls out of consideration for Nam Taeun. He scooped up some vegetable porridge and put it in his mouth. Despite his bad condition, the porridge oddly tasted good.“Ah.”Nam Taeun plopped down on the bed opposite him.“You got a call yesterday.”“A call?”“Yeah. I forgot the name, but it was something like Woo…?”There was only one name that came to mind immediately.‘Contact me when you’re back.’It was clearly a call out of concern since he hadn’t reached out. Woo Yeonjae was the only one who knew how hard it was for him to spend time with his father. At first, Moon Seoyoon hadn’t even realized it himself. As a high school student, home was merely a place to sleep since he spent most of his time at school. He wasn’t particularly close to his father, so there weren’t many incidents that made him aware of his discomfort.It was only after entering university, when he had more free time, that he began to notice the unease. Spending more time with his father made him suddenly realize how awkward it was to be alone with him. Though his father was a busy man, and they didn’t cross paths at home often, whenever they did have meals together or talked, it made him feel strangely suffocated.He had called Woo Yeonjae every time, so there was no way Woo Yeonjae wouldn’t know.“We’re close friends.”He realized too late that Nam Taeun knew Woo Yeonjae was his unrequited love. If they had talked, Nam Taeun would also know that the owner of that name was a man.“With him? He’s really rude.”So they did talk. For a moment, he didn’t know how to control his expression, and his whole body turned pale.“Did you… talk on the phone?”“Yeah. He called me at dawn, so I thought it was something urgent and answered. But I was drunk too, so I don’t remember what I said.”Did he forget the name? Seeing his calm reaction, it seemed he didn’t realize the caller was the same person as his unrequited love. What a relief. Feeling a wave of relaxation, Moon Seoyoon fiddled with his spoon.“How can you say he’s rude if you don’t remember?”“I don’t remember the conversation, but his voice and tone were annoying.”“What did you talk about?”“I told you, I don’t remember. Did he ask who I was? When I tried to answer, my phone died.”“Oh…”Moon Seoyoon glanced at the phone lying on the desk.“I couldn’t find the charger, so I couldn’t charge it. I’ll do it now. Where’s the charger?”“In the drawer.”Nam Taeun, acting magnanimous, pulled the charger from the drawer and connected it to the phone.“Finish that and take your medicine. I have to go out, so call me if you need anything.”“Thanks.”“What’s with the thanks between us? I’m off.”Now that he looked, Nam Taeun was dressed to go out. It seemed he had stopped by briefly to check on him before heading out. Moon Seoyoon stared blankly at Nam Taeun’s back as he left the room, then turned his head towards his phone. The screen, starting to light up, went dark again.“…”He wondered if there had been another call from Woo Yeonjae but didn’t have the courage to check.“Let’s take the medicine first and think about it.”Moon Seoyoon started eating the porridge, though someone else had bought it for him, Woo Yeonjae kept coming to mind.He heard a faint vibration in his sleep. The medicine seemed to be kicking in, making him drowsy. He must have fallen asleep without realizing it. Reaching out to his bedside, he grabbed his phone. In a half-awake state, he crawled back under the covers and answered the call. It seemed his fever had gone down a bit, but his head was still dizzy.“Yeah, hyung.”Even as his fumbling fingers pressed the call button, his heavy eyelids didn’t lift.– …Hyung?Contrary to his assumption that it was Nam Taeun, he heard a different voice. Forcing his swollen eyelids open, Moon Seoyoon recognized the voice immediately but checked the caller ID out of habit.“Oh, Woo Yeonjae.”– Who did you think it was?The voice was as warm as before they parted. Feeling reassured by the gentle tone, Moon Seoyoon burrowed deeper into his blanket.“No, I thought it was hyung.”His words were slurred from sleep and fever.– …Moon Seoyoon. Were you sick?The voice, now slightly irritated, asked with concern. Finding it amusing that Woo Yeonjae could always sense his condition, Moon Seoyoon chuckled. It was strange to be in pain because of Woo Yeonjae and yet laugh because of him too.“I think I caught a cold. I often get sick around this time.”– I’m coming over right now.He could sense movement on the other end of the phone. Moon Seoyoon frowned and spoke up.“You don’t need to come.”The bustling sounds suddenly stopped, as if he had never moved.“I’ve taken medicine and had porridge, so I’m fine. You don’t need to take care of me.”Moon Seoyoon continued speaking, not noticing the subtle silence. Still groggy and with a muddled mind, his words came out jumbled.“And to get into the dorm, you’d have to wait for someone to pass by, and it’s cold outside.”Strangely, there was no response. Did the call drop? Moon Seoyoon checked the screen. The call timer was still ticking.“Yeonjae.”The name slipped out unconsciously.– …Yes?The response came after a brief pause.“My roommate took care of me, so you don’t need to come. It’s a hassle.”– Moon Seoyoon.He expected an acknowledgment but was surprised to hear his name instead.– You don’t need me?Woo Yeonjae’s unexpected question left him confused. Pressing his eyes with the back of his hand, Moon Seoyoon found it hard to follow the conversation.“What are you talking about?”– You said you don’t need me earlier.The voice that had briefly been cold now sounded forlorn. It was a voice that seemed pouty. When did I say that, Moon Seoyoon blinked under the covers. His vision was blurry, perhaps because he had pressed his eyes too hard.“Did I say that?”– Yes. You said you don’t need me anymore.“Did I? Honestly, I don’t remember anything I said. I just woke up.”– I can’t even get mad at a sick person…“Don’t be mad.”Moon Seoyoon mumbled, curling up a bit more.Even if he got hurt by Woo Yeonjae, it was impossible to remove him from his life. There was a period of two years when they didn’t see each other, but even then, he had a vague feeling that they would meet again someday and return to their usual relationship.Before being someone he liked, he was a friend who shared his happy childhood. If Woo Yeonjae turned away from him, Moon Seoyoon would have nothing left. He had long lost his family and his piano. He couldn’t lose his last childhood friend.– Moon Seoyoon, you still don’t know how weak I am to you.To keep this kindness, he had to hide his feelings. Getting hurt didn’t matter. It wasn’t said to him directly, and it wasn’t aimed at him, so he could endure it.Moon Seoyoon closed his eyes to calm his mind.As long as he didn’t get greedy, everything would be fine.