Surviving as a Useless Bard in a Game

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I held a slightly heavy long sword and took a rough stance.

I had never formally trained in swordsmanship, but thanks to the platinum adventurer Nisha, I had learned the concept of fighting through attributes… So I at least knew how to fight.

A typical opening for a battle between a wizard and a knight.

Right. Time to think like it’s chess.

Unlike Skylar, who possesses infinite magical power and a divine heart… my opponent was clearly at a disadvantage with a noticeable “casting delay” after pulling out a scroll.

I might just win.

A draw was also a possibility.

I learned everything from Nisha. Although I didn’t learn it perfectly in just a week, I definitely grasped the combat methods against wizards and warriors. Especially with the spear user; I had a solid understanding.

You might ask what a spear user is doing, but in such a confined space, a wizard’s tactics are limited.

If there were no spatial restrictions, a wizard’s combat ability would increase exponentially while the knight would be disadvantaged. But at this distance… if I can avoid a few attacks, I can get my own chance to strike.

“The attack magic inscribed on the scroll is non-lethal, but even one hit would likely render me combat incapable.”

There’s a slim chance Skylar might go easy on me, but it’s low. That brat kept his word, maintaining a dogged personality despite his appearance.

The opening.

A commonly used tactic.

The wizard’s first move.

Skylar moved his hand. I dashed straight ahead. A scroll sprang from my cloak, and magical power glimmered in an instant.

“[Ball]”

It sparkled.

The timing for activation.

3 seconds.
2 seconds.
1 second.

Now.

I held the training longsword like a spear. I never intended to win against Skylar as a “knight” anyway. What matters most to me is “survival.”

Survival tactics start by utilizing all available terrain, environment, and objects.

The blade of the training sword isn’t sharp. It’s rather blunt. Thankfully, it’s easy to grip… it lacks power.

Thanks to this, I could grip the sword firmly with merely a thin leather glove and lift it like a spear.

At this moment, I became a spear user.

And then, Skylar’s first attack for containment was on its way.

I learned from Nisha.

—A wizard first launches an attack for containment at a distant warrior. Typically, a sphere of magical power.

It was accurate.

The chances of my habit of clumsiness or narcolepsy kicking in were low. It was morning after all.

I can definitely block it.

Ping.

A clear, refreshing metallic sound.

The tip of the training sword collided with a glowing sphere of magical power the size of a bowling ball.

And then, the magic shattered.

“[Binding Plant]”

I tried to move my feet.

But I didn’t.

‘…Binding!’

I looked at my feet. Green plant vines… were binding my feet and ankles.

If it were a typical binding scroll, I would be immobile, combat incapable, and defeated. But right now, it was a practice match. It meant non-lethal magic.

The power and strength of this training scroll were merely enough to tie shoelaces.

I wanted to avoid injuries, but for now, winning was important.

‘I want to hit that brat once.’

…Honestly speaking, I found Skylar annoying.

Yeah. Just one hit. Me too.

I took off my shoes.

The rough dirt was mixed with stones. My feet were injured, and it seemed like blood was flowing. Something hot was seeping out through my feet.

But it’s fine.

I took a step forward without stopping.

Skylar was trying to retreat with a flustered expression.

The next scroll was coming.

Even while panicking, his hands adeptly prepared the next move. A skilled adventurer’s skill. Skylar was truly not a simple opponent.

However, if I could just get into a favorable situation even once, victory would be mine.

Skylar was likely preparing a defensive scroll next. A shield? A barrier? Or perhaps attempting to bind me again.

I couldn’t know what type of scroll it was, and Skylar had already used two. It might be a good strategy to let him exhaust the remaining eight scrolls while soaking up magic.

If I were aiming for a draw.

But I was aiming for victory.

Without a chance to use another scroll, I moved my hands in slow motion, holding the sword like a spear, getting into a thrusting stance. I thrust forward.

Even with a blunt sword tip, it would still hurt a little. Skylar.

That annoying brat.

“…[Flash]!”

I messed up. Skylar chose to attack rather than bind or defend my feet. An attack that was almost evasive.

I couldn’t see. Either the aim missed, or Skylar turned his body to dodge.

My vision gradually returned… No, there’s no time to wait.

‘Move.’

Feeling the power of magic shift to my eyes. In that week… while taking direct hits from the platinum adventurer, I learned enough about magic management to be basic but possible.

The pink hue in my eyes intensified.

But what I was aiming for wasn’t charm, but something else.

Options appeared.

–
1. [Right]
2. [Left]
3. [Center]
–

…Status window.

When I call for it, it never helps when I need it, so why now?

No, for now, let’s just win.

Thinking comes later.

–
1. [Right]
–

Skylar is left-handed.

I didn’t purposely figure it out, but traveling together, these little things become apparent.

What I figured out, I’ll put to use.

That’s how to survive.

The probability of the center or left being higher.

“It’s brightening my eyes!”

“…For someone who’s hurt, your recovery is a bit too fast.”

“I’m not giving up until I land a hit on you!”

Skylar frowned as he prepared the next scroll.

Did my provocation work?

No, he’s a cautious type.

No matter how much of a lefty he is, he’d surely check my body’s orientation before casting a scroll. So, what’s my choice?

‘For now, a fake.’

I shifted my weight to the left based on Skylar’s perspective. And just as he reached for the scroll to prepare magic.

Right away? No, not yet. I’ll wait until just before activation.

Dodging comes afterward.

Time around me seemed to flow slowly. No, it really was flowing slowly. I’m not sure why, but it works, anyway.

My body still felt sluggish; I didn’t intentionally slow down time. Perhaps my visual acuity surpassed expectations, or my mind was spinning that quickly.

I don’t know.

Anyway, let’s think about it later.

Skylar’s magic activated.

What’s the scroll’s name?

“[Ball]”

Ball.

When the duel first began, he launched that blue magic sphere. Was he using the same magic twice?

The blue magical sphere aimed and flew towards me. Specifically, to the left from Skylar’s point of view.

I stepped down with my right foot and lifted my left.

And then, I slid.

My thighs and feet scraped against the rough dirt and stones. Scratches appeared.

…‘Thin Skin’ was my choice.

Why did I only think of that now? It’s driving me crazy.

Anyway, it’s an attack.

Holding onto the longsword, this… I’m too late—

“[Binding Plant]”

Skylar activated the scroll.

The vines grew and grabbed my sword.

I was unable to strike Skylar with the training longsword. A typical knight would have lost to a wizard at the moment of having his sword taken.

But I wasn’t a typical knight. I was a bard. A damned bard willing to do anything to survive.

And you’re not an ordinary wizard either. You can’t see magic and lack a magical heart. You’re just a scroll user.

So… there will inevitably be a casting delay.

Having used two scrolls in succession, you’re out of hands now?

Not binding me with the vines and instead binding my weapon was clearly Skylar’s mistake. He probably did it out of concern I might get hurt.

But, step back.

That consideration is why I win.

You little brat!

‘No, it does feel like my opponent is looking out for me a bit. He’s only used two scrolls so far.’

I’m a bit annoyed, but in any case, the fact that I won doesn’t change.

I’m going to tease him all day long now.

Yap.

My fist made contact with Skylar’s belly.

And then, nothing happened.

I clenched my fist with all my might and hit his stomach with my other hand.

Yap.

Nothing happened again.

Surprisingly, it had no effect whatsoever.

“Selina, you win by decision. I grant you the silver badge.”

“…Huh?”

“Congratulations.”

“Oh, no, no, wait a second. No.”

I could hardly put any strength into my hands. My arms were weak.

My legs and feet were all scraped up and a mess.

…Combat incapable.

I was just throwing a tantrum.

In the end, my plan to hit Skylar failed and I couldn’t even tease him about it.

The guild receptionist cast a healing scroll on me.

The scrapes and blood disappeared in an instant.

However, my mood didn’t recover.

“Why push yourself so hard…”

“I won.”

“Yes. You must have.”

“I said I won.”

“Yes.”

…It doesn’t feel like I won at all.

I’m the only one badly injured while that brat didn’t even show signs of pain from my punches.

—More than that, it feels like Nisha taught me not how to beat a wizard, but how to beat Skylar for over a week. I definitely acted just as she instructed. Is this rehearsed…?

The guild review ends.

My mood was gloomy, and the guild was filled with nothing but depressed old men.

Receiving a new badge that says “Silver, Selina,” I too sulked in a corner of the Adventurer’s Guild while sipping a drink, parallel to those gloomy old men.

I pulled out my precious instrument from my pocket.

I borrowed some alcohol.

I downed a whole beer on an empty stomach.

The alcohol was weak. The cost-performance of the alcohol was good. Before my intelligence could rise, the inebriation took hold first.

Wobbling.

I climbed onto the table.

—♬