System Only Gives Me Useless Gifts

A pudgy attending with sagging cheeks stormed up the stairs and kicked the metal door open with a loud bang. He tugged himself onto the rooftop and took out his pack of cigarettes.

"Damn ****!" He cursed.

The attendings huddled on the rooftop turned toward the new arrival.

"Whoa there Dr. Wei, what got you all wound up?" The cardiologist asked while puffs of smoke escaped from his nose and mouth.

The group of three junior attendings gathered in a circle as they smoked and complained about their days. They were all hired within the past two years, but after attaining the status as attending doctors, they were still bullied by the seniors and patients.

"I got assigned this s***** first year resident," Dr. Wei complained as he completed their circle.

"Most first years are pretty dull and meek if you ask me. They only turn on you during the second year. Don't tell me you got one of those three ACS demons?"

"Yeah, I got that b****. She's just a first year, but she acts like she owns the department. The ****. I thought she was some bigshot, but she's just the daughter of some high school teachers!"

The attending sighed. "Well, someone was bound to get her. You have my condolences."

Mi Xuan was learning to communicate better with her patients, but the skill had not been transferred over to her co-workers.

"Since we are in the same department, do you want to trade?" Dr. Wei asked the other orthopaedist. "Who do you have?"

"Li Yun and An Luchang…" The orthopaedist replied slowly.

Dr. Wei's lower lip shifted as he considered his options. He knew a bit of their reputation, but they did not seem as bad.

"I'll take over two night shifts if you trade me them for those two b******."

The orthopaedist thought about it. "Three nights?"

"You got yourself a trade," Dr. Wei shook hands with the orthopaedist and accepted the offer.

The following day, Dr. Wei waited for the two residents in the Orthopedic department lobby area. He saw two young men looking around the lobby. He recognized Li Yun, who was recently on the news for capturing a criminal.

"Didn't that doctor say to meet us here?" asked Li Yun looking around the lobby.

"Are you the two first-year residents from ACS?" Dr. Wei asked as he approached them. "I'm Doctor Wei. I've been reassigned to supervise you. Follow me, I'm assuming you guys had the tour of the department the other day, so we will see the patients first."

Dr. Wei was a relatively new attending, so he didn't have as many patients as the other attendings. His usual day included seeing around 15 patients and scribbling in the chart.

The only thing different that month was having two outside residents shadow him. As they walked into his suite, he gave his nurse a cheerful nod to start bringing in the patients. He was already happy that the two new residents weren't as chatty as the guy Yang Kang from before.

As he sat down, he signaled the two residents to stand by the back corner. They followed his directions and he cheerfully smiled.

"Why don't you read to me the first patient history and physical," Dr. Wei requested.

"First patient is Ms. Chi, 56 years old, works as a receptionist," An Luchang began reading the report from the computer screen. "She has been complaining of dull and achy wrist pains for the past 7 years. First scans show very mild signs of carpal tunnel. She had been going to therapy every month, but recently it has not been working. She's requesting another exam."

Dr. Wei nodded as though he understood. After finishing the review, he asked the nurse to bring in the patient. Ms. Chi, a slightly short and overweight woman, walked into the room and greeted the doctor. After the usual pleasantry, she narrated the reason for being there.

"Oh, you see doctor," she began to explain. "My workload has increased exponentially over the years with all these digitization initiatives. Our office is going digital, but guess who has to input all the information into the system? Me!"

"I see, so your wrist pains are related to your work?" Dr. Wei asked.

The woman laughed out her frustration. "You don't understand Doctor, my job description is clerical staff, not copywriter or typist. I have already explained to them that I have carpal tunnel, but they insist that as long as I type properly, it should be fine. They have the nerve to say that I probably type more at home. What the heck? What I do at home is my decision. So you see doctor, I'm here to have another scan to prove to them that it's making me worse. I would also like you to assist with my lawsuit against them."

Doctor Wei nodded the entire time, but he had subconsciously blocked out half of what she was saying.

Li Yun also nodded along. Doctor Wei didn't seem like a bad guy, he wondered if Mi Xuan was being dramatic. She didn't seem to like a lot of people.

"Ms. Chi, I will do my very best for you," Dr. Wei replied. He looked at his MRI scans. "The scans show that you still have a mild carpal tunnel. Now, I'll perform a Tinel test, please give me your hand."

"Yes, doctor, but don't you think it's unreasonable for me to work in my condition?"

Dr. Wei tested her hand. "Oh, it looks like you are fine. Take breaks between work, massage your wrist, and stretch."

"What about my lawsuit?"

"Ms. Chi, you are free to take a copy of the MRI scans to your lawsuit. Unfortunately, we are not usually allowed to go to court unless we have a court order. I hope you understand."

"But will this MRI win me the lawsuit?"

"I hope you hire a good lawyer," Dr. Wei nodded.

The woman didn't look like she wanted to leave until she got a note saying she didn't have to work. After nagging for another five minutes, Dr. Wei gave in and said the nurse will give her a note for five days' rest.

Li Yun could see how Mi Xuan would have pissed off the patient, and then Doctor Wei. It technically wasn't the right thing to do, but sometimes it was the only thing doctors could do. Patients making medical claims to get out of work was as common as people walking the earth.

"Ms. Chi?" Li Yun asked.

Ms. Chi turned to the resident standing behind Doctor Wei. Doctor Wei also turned his head, slightly alarmed. He was a bit frightened because the other day, Mi Xuan started to berate the patient. He was hoping the new resident had better sense.

"Do you currently suffer from headaches and sometimes rash on your skin?" Li Yun asked.

Ms. Chi's eyes opened, and she nodded. "Oh yes, I have been complaining to my family doctor, but she said it's just stress. Do you know a way to cure it?"

Unfortunately, the only cure for laziness and work allergies was retirement.

"When you go on vacation, I suggest you visit a couple of places," Li Yun replied. Li Yun scribbled a list of places. "I heard from the monks that every time they visit, they feel a healing sensation."

Ms. Chi's eyes lit up. "Is that so? My next vacation is in a few weeks, I'll put it on my calendar."

Ms. Chi thanked the doctor and left. The two men in the room looked curiously at Li Yun.

"What did you recommend to her?" Dr. Wei asked.

"A friend of mine is working on an architectural project around major cities. They are basically migrant worker shelters."

"Oh?"

"Just showing her the differences between her work and their work."

Doctor Wei started laughing hysterically.

"Dr. Wei, you also have to consider your position," Li Yun said politely. "You're a doctor, not a pushover. If you continue giving into patients like that, you'll end up like your predecessor, sued for fraud and bribery. You're new, so start making better habits."

Doctor Wei's mouth zipped up quickly, why was he being lectured by a resident? Before he could defend himself, an email appeared on his computer screen.