The Great Adventure

The gang soon found themselves in the middle of a Bourtroom. As we all know, bears do not use lawyers, so Mushpuff, Bird, Plagiarize, Snorter, Hoofa, Gumpton, Klumpkrump, and Qaeron all had to defend themselves. The Budje began to speak.

“Cat 1 and penguin, you’re in here because you killed the bears of Bear Pit. Also, one of those bears was the Bear King’s only son. Dog, you’re here because you squashed a bear with your elephant.”

“Darn!” whispered Hoofa. “I thought they didn’t see that.”

“Cat 2, you’re here because you destroyed many Bearmy ships with your Energy Cube. You also killed Chunk.”

“Why is Chunk so important?” asked Klumpkrump. “He was just some random bear.”

“He was president.”

“Of what?”

“Bear President. Anyways, the human and the pig are here for associating with criminals, and the elephant is here because it was the one who squashed the bear. We also have one special case before we wrap things up. Anyways, let Bourt begin.”

“...so how exactly does Bourt work?” asked Mushpuff.

“It’s simple,” said the Bear Judge. “We tell you to defend yourselves for various things you did. The Bear Jury takes notes and decides if you’re guilty or not guilty.”

“Nobody’s arguing against us?” asked Snorter.

“Your morals are,” explained Bear Judge. “Anyways, let’s begin with the Bear Pit Incident. Cat 1 and penguin, please stand.”

Mushpuff and Bird stood up. It was very stressful in Bourt, bear court. Everyone was looking at them.

“Now defend yourselves,” said the Bear Judge.

“Your honor,” begun Mushpuff, “we are innocent.”

“We’ll see about that,” interrupted the judge.

“Our spaceship, you see, it runs on ketchup. We crashed on your planet and saw a massive billboard that said something like ‘the bears on this planet have ketchup for blood’. So we went around looking for bears. Eventually we found a bunch of bears in a pit in a room at the bottom of a ravine who said they were trapped. And then my friend pushed a button that killed the bears and we took their ketchup.”

Upon hearing this, the room was filled with the loud sound of pencils on paper. It was the bear jurors, taking notes.

“That seems like an incredibly convenient series of events,” said the Bear Judge. The bear jurors wrote louder and harder upon hearing that.

“Well, it’s what happened,” said Mushpuff.

“Penguin, what do you have to say about this?”

“Everything he said was true,” said Bird, who was quite afraid of speaking in front of so many bears.

After a few brief moments of relative silence, filled only with the sound of pencils on paper, the doors of the Bourtroom banged open and a BEAR walked in.

“I have very important information!” yelled the bear who entered the room. “The bears in Bear Pit, including the Bear King’s son, were all… ENEMIES of the STATE!!!”

The Bourtroom was filled with the gasps of hundreds of bears. The sound of pencils on paper got dangerously loud.

“That’s what we’ve been trying to tell you this whole time!!” said Mushpuff, taking this perfect opportunity. “We were eliminating them because they threatened the Bear Republic!”

The sound of pencils on paper reached 130 decibels.

“Is that all you wish to say?” asked the Bear Judge.

“Yes,” replied Mushpuff.

The sound of pencils on paper ceased almost immediately.

“Dog!” shouted Bear Judge. “You squashed a bear with your elephant. Explain yourself.”

“It’s pretty much the same scenario, yo,” said Hoofa, standing up. “We needed ketchup for our ship. That bear was just kinda, like, sitting there, so I squashed him.” The bear jurors began to take notes once again.

“I’m sure there would’ve been better ways of acquiring ketchup,” said the Bear Judge.

“Well, we couldn’t think of any, so too bad,” said Hoofa, sitting down.

The bear jurors finished taking notes and then the third trial began.

“Cat number 2, you destroyed many Bearmy ships and killed Chunk. Defend yourself!”

“In both cases, the Bearmy attacked us first,” explained Klumpkrump.

“Oh really?” said the Bear Judge. “You have no evidence.”

“It’s true!” shouted Klumpkrump. “They’ve been after us for a long time because Mushpuff and Bird, also known as Cat 1 and the penguin, killed those bears in Bear Pit! Which was clearly a good thing because they were enemies of the state!”

“Yes, but your dog friend also attacked that one bear,” said Budje.

“I’m sure we can get that sorted out,” said Klumpkrump.

“I have something to say!” said Snorter. Everyone’s attention was quickly redirected towards her, and Klumpkrump sat down as Snorter stood up.

“What?” asked the Budje.

“I wish to reveal two crimes that the Bearmy has committed!”

The Bourtroom was filled with shocked gasps for the second time.

“Nonsense!” announced the Bear Judge. “The Bearmy is incapable of committing crimes!”

“You’ll see about that after I’m done talking,” said Snorter.

“No, really. They’re excused from all crimes.”

“But they destroyed my city! And they stole an innocent bear’s locket and left him to die!”

“Ah, speaking of that bear, that’s the Special Case of the Day. Qaeron, please stand!”

Qaeron stood up and the Bourtroom was filled with boos.

“I don’t suppose he told you what he did to the Bear Queen!” shouted the Bear Judge to the gang over the sound of the booing.

“Mmmm, Qaeron is innozent, yez?” said Qaeron. “Innozent!!”

“Bring in the locket!” shouted the Bear Judge. The Bourtroom doors were closed just so they could be dramatically opened again. Behind them was a bear holding a golden locket with an odd symbol on it.

“The Bear Queen saw that everyone hated him, so she invited him for a chat to see what was going on,” explained the Bear Judge. “But he showed her the inside of this locket and she died!”

The Bourtroom was filled with shocked gasps for the third time, this time being the loudest out of all the times.

“Qaeron, WHAT is inside that locket?” asked Klumpkrump.

“It is zomething from home, yez,” replied Qaeron.

“Qaeron the bear!” said the Budje. “You have been accused of murdering the Bear Queen! Whatever is inside that locket helped you achieve it!”

The bear holding the locket, now curious as to what exactly was inside it, opened it up. As soon as he saw what was in it, he DIED!!!!