The Lightbearer's Gift

I was riding Noire in the early hours of the morning. The sun was just about to peek above the horizon, and I was only a few hours in my search for transports. I was flying over the wide stretches of grassland that comprises most of the Baronesses territory and followed the supply routes noted by the Baronesses scouts. Against the sky Noire’s Grey feathers were practically invisible so I only flew about 1000 feet in the air.

This was much more enjoyable than sitting around waiting to respond to an attack. The baroness was certainly generous with her payments. Thinking of her brought back memories of our night together. It was quite enjoyable, but now with distance between us, I could clearly see the game she was playing with me.

It was manipulation without any real manipulation. Her generals, noble vassals, servants and command staff all treated me with the utmost respect. It was enjoyable, and that was the problem. I despised the idea that she understood my personality enough to maneuver me so easily. I had nothing to complain about, and this led me to feel like I owe her my best effort. Then finally when her total victory was assured, she gave me her body. Child or no she was still a lovely woman, and with such accommodations as I had been given, what man wouldn’t fall for her charms.

I shook my head and chuckled, as the idea of making my alliance with her deeper didn’t raise my hackles as usual.

“Far too smart,” I said to myself.

I couldn’t really blame her, it’s not like I did anything different with Benny. I wanted a tool to use and gave her what she desired most to buy her loyalty and devotion.

While the magical spells and tens of thousands of coin in my account were useful, one boon I never realized I would gain is the chance to observe how the Baroness ruled. Vernon ruled with a combination of arrogance, fear and bravado. His boisterous nature engendered loyalty and devotion from his men. The willingness to spill blood inspired fear, which he used to maintain control of his lands and before his probable assassination he was successful.

The Baroness ruled differently, she was cold and distant. She would not drink or eat with any below her station and maintained the strictest poise and grace in all things. The difference was that she was constantly present, in all aspects of ruling her lands. Taxes, trade, commerce, war, noble intrigue, it seems that she took all with the seriousness it deserved. There was no plot within her capital that she didn’t know about and from what I could tell had eyes everywhere.

This inspired a different kind of fear that made even the nobility stay in line. They didn’t squabble about and scheme as the nobility in Vernon does. All this I watched over the last few weeks. I took it as a lesson in ruling that maybe one day I could use.

I found a decent enough cave with no signs of predators on the side of a small hill to use as a safe place where I could transform without anyone coming to check on the screams.

In the middle of my musing, I finally spotted what I was looking for. A train of 15 loaded horse drawn carriages were clearly heading in the direction of the occupying army. No doubt it was a supply train and from the size of the carriages it was a considerable amount. I could see from this distance the 30 or so guards that were walking alongside the train on the compacted dirt road. I was too high to see if they were simple mercenaries or actual members of the army.

I dove down towards the first carriage at incredible speed. Shouts of alarm went up as they noticed the gigantic bird diving towards them. Noire pulled up, halting her dive and landing in front of the first caravan terrifying the horses. Soldiers streamed forward circling around us but keeping their distance.

“Who are you?” one man in full plate shouted as he stepped forward, brandishing his sword and shield.

Ignoring him, dismounted to Noire and stepped a few feet forward looking unimpressed at the 32 guards surrounding me.

“Elf if you refuse to answer you will be cut down.” He said impatiently while throwing worried glances at Noire.

Counting the soldiers and drivers of the carriages it was 47 humans, a decent amount to start. I cast a massive shield covering the entire area making sure that no one would escape. They stared up in shock as the shield expanded to over 500 feet locking them in with me.

“Archers,” the man shouted.

10 of the soldiers knocked arrows and prepared to fire. I looked at the guard considering how to go about this then I chucked as I thought of a spell, I had never considered would be useful.

“What do you want?” the man said with fear in his voice.

I used my other hand to cast suction. It took a large amount of ether to produce enough suction to pull a person towards me, but one thing I had in abundance was stamina. The man flew through the air towards me and landed in a heap, dazed. Before he could recover from the spell, I planted a hand on his face and began ripping the life from him. He couldn’t hope to match my power, so the process only took a few seconds. I savored the delicious rush of power that coursed through me.

The rest stared dumbfounded as from the outside it looked like I simply touched the man and he died.

“Well then who is next?” I asked.

This prompted them to charge me in masse; I sighed. It was going to be an annoying process.

20 minutes later.

“Please sir mage I have a family, a wife and child don’t……..” his words cut off as I drained the life of the last man. 11 humans ended up dying before I could drain their lives. This last person was one of the drivers, some average looking peasant. The only distinguishing feature was him being massively obese. Doing this while being attacked was an annoyance and I barely felt half full. One of the horses made a noise. I shrugged, deciding to drain the lives of the horses as well.

Noire started to tear the armor off one of the dead soldiers. She mangled the body horribly before getting it off. It was rather dexterous of her given her size. I was wondering what she was doing before she swallowed the man whole. Then she moved on to another soldier.

“Noire no. I need these bodies to be found later.” I said.

She looked at me guiltily since I had told her multiple times not to eat humans. Seeing the massive creature look so guilty almost made me feel bad. She sidled over and gave me a soft nudge with her giant head. I sighed and gave her some life ether. She was a good girl almost all the time, so I suppose she did deserve a reward.

“Fine, you can have this one. But no more, you’re getting too big” I said pointing at the fat man.

She hadn’t actually gotten any bigger the life ether I was constantly feeding her seemed to make other changes. It mostly seemed to just be making her stronger and faster over time. She giddily ripped the man in two pieces and swallowed the mangled parts whole.

When did she get a taste for humans?

I checked each carriage. They mostly carried food, and little else of interest. I did take a few luxury goods like wine and cheeses that were no doubt meant for the nobility who were in the army. I also found a small chest with a few hundred gelding that I put in one of the Noire’s saddle bags. Taking flight, I carpet bombed the area with over 30 fireballs to make sure no one could tell what really happened and sped off into the air in search of other victims.

In my hours in the air, I could feel the energy bleeding off into me slowly. It nourished my tissues, no doubt improving them but at a certain point the improvement stopped as I reached the highest potential of my body. At least that is what I had noticed over the first few months after my first transformation.

It took another day before I found a second transport. This one seemed to be for military equipment. Carriages were piled high with swords and shields, pieces of armor and tools like hammers and nails. Devouring everyone was an easy enough process, and I was getting better at dialing back my power to reduce fatalities when they decided to attack in mass. I looked over the latest carnage bodies lying on the ground in macabre poses. Noire was sneakily trying to eat a soldier. I ignored her and focused on my internal senses.

I was 65 lives in and at this point I was teeming with more energy than ever. While I felt godlike, I could already feel the power slowly bleeding away, I was close though. Just one more and I could break through.

“Noire come.” She swallowed the man whole and with a single flap landed in front of me. My determination was absolute. The mad hunger dominated my mind, and the promise of sweet ecstasy and power culled any hesitation from draining so many.

‘More, more, more’ thought as we took off. I just needed a few more to break through. Finally, I spotted another group actually leaving. They were all on foot and from their armor and weapons they were soldiers of one of the 3 barons. There were 18 men and 2 women. Deserters possibly.

I landed a few dozen feet and hopped off Noire. Stumbling the entire time. I was practically bursting with energy. The group started asking questions as they drew swords. None of it really made it to my mind. They were little more than food. I started consuming again with little care for the begging that came from those that realized there was nothing they could do to stop me. At some point in the slaughter, I started laughing.

Finally, after the tenth man I broke through. I rapidly drained the lives of the rest and blew up the entire area. I drunkenly stumbled over to Noire barely managing to get myself strapped in.

‘To the Cave quickly.’ I commanded. I glanced at my hand; it looked as if there was a bright light glowing under my skin. I sat there mesmerized at the red hew that my flesh and blood created. I was getting myself ready for the pain to start but nothing came. Just that glowing light under my skin.

Noire landed in the cave around half an hour later. My worry seemed to spur her on, so she flew at top speed the entire time. The entirety of my body glowed as if my bones were made of pure light. I unstrapped myself and dismounted. Noire looked at me worriedly, but I just stood there watching my hands. Glancing inside my leather breastplate I could see that I was glowing inside as well.

I glanced into the ether and was nearly blinded by the intensity of the life ether.

There was no pain, for some reason that scared me. I didn’t know what to do at this point so I just sat in the corner of the cave and let whatever would happen. I didn’t truly start to worry until a crack opened up on the back of my palm and light burst forth.

“What?” I shouted as I bolted to my feet. Then another crack opened up and more light. Then I began to smell burning flesh. The light from inside me started cooking my flesh from the inside out. The skin on my arms cracked faster and faster. A massively bright white light bursts forth from every crack. I could tell it was moving up my arm. And slowly I could see the brighter light being emitted from my neck.

“Oh fuck,” I shouted then I realized there was light being emitted from my mouth. I tried to use my abilities to repair the damage. But I couldn't do anything with the ether. I couldn’t even cast the simplest spell. Then the light in my hands died down and faded into nothing leaving charred flesh. I had lost all feeling in my hands. They had turned from black to gray. I watched in horror as half of a pinky broke away and fell to the floor. Then my arms from the elbow down simply broke off like spent charcoals and fell to the ground making a soft pile of ash.

The sleeves of my armor hung loosely. I tried to move then I tripped and fell. My ankles went out like my arms, and I simply broke and fell to the ground. Through all this there wasn’t even a hint of pain. Or any feeling at all. Dread came over me as I realized I was dying; I could see the lights from my cracked face since I fell face first. One of my ears fell off and disintegrated into ash. I lost all feeling in my body. If it progresses like this, I could have little more than a few minutes to live.

Think moon. Think. How do I save myself? My lower jaw fell off as I attempted to scream. Everything I could think of was useless since I could even cast or use life ether. As the seconds ticked down to my eventual death. I thought of my short life in this world. I had done nothing in the end, nothing to be remembered for. Was I really brought here just to fail like this, what a perfectly insignificant life. I lost vision in my left eye then my right.

In those final moments leading up to my death I felt strangely at peace. It was for some reason a familiar comfort. Finally, there was nothing, not even a thought. There was only the great abyss that was death.

I floated in eternal darkness for what could well have been a few seconds or an eternity. Then I snapped awake.

I looked around my surroundings trying to get my bearings. The first thing I noticed was the sky; vast and blue with not a single cloud. Below me was a strangely calm ocean, which I stood atop. What was odd was that there didn’t seem to be a traditional horizon. It simply stretched on infinitely. Looking down at the surface of the water I saw my reflection or lack thereof. Where I expected to see a royal elf, I saw instead a vaguely humanoid shape of white energy. I didn’t breathe nor did I even have eyes. I tried to clasp my hands, but they simply passed through each other.

I looked around in utter confusion at my situation. Out of sheer curiosity I tried to use magic but as expected nothing happened. The ether was as dead to me as with the moment of my death. I shrugged not really sure what to do. I tried to speak, and sound came out, I didn’t have a voice box or a mouth but for whatever reason I could speak. I shrugged and simply chose a direction to walk in and started off. My steps didn’t make any kind of ripple on the water’s surface.

I walked for hours, my mind flitting from one topic to the other. In this state it was rather hard to keep my mind on one topic. One moment I was in existential dread and the next moment a calmness would take over and nothing fazed me. My scenery didn’t change, the world remained an endless expanse of water and sky. There wasn’t even a sun to navigate by.

Hours streamed into days I never felt tired or even bored, the concerns of my life were starting to fade.

“What’s this now?” a voice from behind me said.

I spun around to see another amorphous blob of energy stepping out of the water below. Instead of the white that I was composed of, this creature was a mass of rippling blacks and purples. Each step it made toward me caused that inky blackness to seep into the water. I don’t know why but something told me to not let it touch me.

“We hadn’t had a guest in some time, please let us talk”, its voice was changing pitch after each syllable ranging from a small child to a grown man.

“What are you?” I asked.

It clapped and hopped in place reminding me of Lori when she got excited.

Did it say we?

“It doesn’t know,” another voice from behind me said.

Turning around I saw another emerging from the water. Then hundreds and thousands started to emerge.

“NO. I FOUND IT FIRST” the first one shouted.

“There is nothing wrong with sharing, we are so hungry just give us a bite.” another said.

Then the creatures began to argue. I had no clue what I should do in this situation, there were endless thousands of them surrounding me and they were slowly inching closer.

“No, it’s mine, I'll have it,” another shouted.

“You had the last one, it's our turn, look at it, so plump and juicy.”

“Perhaps we could talk before eating.” I said.

“No. No talk only feed” it said.

Suddenly there was a burst of movement and a few started sprinting towards me. That seemed to prompt the rest to act. Before the first creature could make contact, a bright white barrier popped up around me, similar to a radiant shield but without the gold tint. The creatures clawed against it trying to get in. I could do little more than watch in horrified fascination as the barrier held them back. A bright light from above me caught my attention. It was a being similar to the creatures trying to eat me, but it was made of white and gold energy.

“Begone beasts” it said its voice unnaturally loud. A massive pulse of energy burst forth from the being and the creatures disintegrated into nothing. Once more the area was clear and the barrier around me disappeared.

My savoir finally landed in front of me floating about a foot above the surface of the water. Interestingly enough it had no reflection.

“My thanks?” I said, confused at the situation.

“Think nothing of it.” I couldn’t really tell if it was male or female; its voice was as impermanent as the creatures.

“It is fortunate that I arrived in time, your soul would have been consumed and death would follow. It is impossible to use mortal magic within this place.”

So, souls existed. I had a million questions but one was at the forefront of my mind.

“I watched myself disintegrate. Yet you speak as if I’m not already dead.”

Its head tilted to the left considering. Then it said,

“Ah yes, you have the same misconception most mortals do. Your body was destroyed so you presume death. But you are not a body. You are a soul; you have a body.”

I suppose that answers that.

“As interesting as that revelation is, nothing really changes. I’m still as good as dead.”

“Indeed, you absorbed too much living ether.”

“Living ether? Do you mean that literally?” I asked.

“Yes, living ether is the very essence of a soul.” It said,

So, I was feeding on people’s souls?

“You seem to know much about my abilities. What are you.” I asked.

It simply said nothing, I waited for a few more moments and the silence stretched until it became awkward.

“Ok then, you said I absorbed too much living ether, what actually happens when I do that.”

“The body anchors the soul to the material plane, your absorption of living Ether strengthens the soul, in order to maintain the bond, the body must grow in power as well.”

“So, when I absorb living ether from others….”

It continued for me. “The soul weakens and eventually it can no longer anchor itself to the body. Without a soul the body dies, and the soul moves on to oblivion or reincarnation.”.

“But I didn’t move on for some reason.”

“Your soul was too powerful to simply fade when disconnected from your body thus you ended up here. You absorbed so much living ether in such a small amount of time, that your body couldn’t change fast enough to contain your power. Which led to its destruction.”

This creature had some detailed insight into my abilities, which only served to raise my suspicion.

“And tell me why do you know so much about my abilities? Have you been watching me?” I asked.

“Not always.” It said,

What no long-winded explanation this time. Either way I had to ask it, just to clear my suspicions.

“Are you some kind of god?” I asked.

“Yes and no. To a human peasant without magic, would you not also be considered a god” it said.

Is this creature suggesting the difference between me and it was the difference between defenseless human peasants and myself. I had more questions on my mind but there was one more thing I needed to know.

“Did you bring me to this world?” I asked.

There was a ripple across its body. Then it answered.

“Yes,” it said.

I had no heart to race but even then, I felt like it was about to burst.

“Why?” I asked.

I needed to know the reason beyond everything else I needed to know why I was brought to this world. It said nothing, just floating there.

“Can you lie?” I asked.

“No,” it said.

“Why”

No answer.

So, it can’t lie instead It chooses to remain silent.

“What are those creatures?” I said, pointing at the waters below.

“Corrupted souls.” It said,

I was beginning to understand the creature now. Its answers were usually short when I was getting close to information it didn’t want me to know.

“If I break through again, will I return here?” I asked.

“Possibly.” It said,

“Will you be here?”

“Unlikely, the corrupted has your scent and will devour you long before I can find you, this sea stretches to infinity. I am one and they number in the millions.”

Well, that was a problem if I ever tried to get anyone to pass the second barrier. I wonder why Noire could but then again, she was a bird not a sentient being.

“Where did I come from?” I asked.

It said nothing.

“What is my true name?”

Nothing

“Did you give me these abilities?” I asked.

“No.”

“What is your name?”

Nothing.

“How old am I?” I asked.

“I do not know.” It said,

“Why don’t you know.” I asked, getting frustrated.

Nothing.

“Why won’t you answer some of my questions?” I asked.

“Your mind could not handle the burden of the truth.”

The being considered for a moment then continued. “It would break.”

The creature looked to the sky for a moment then returned its attention to me.

“Time is short, you must return to the material plane. Spend too long within the sea of souls and you can become lost.” I said.

“How exactly? My body is destroyed.” I asked.

“Simple, you must rebuild it.” it said.

“Ok? How.”

“The greatest factor in magic is will. You must imagine your body, and will it into existence, imagine your bone, muscle, tendons, skin. You know how an organism should function, hold the dizzying complexity that is life within your mind. I will use your power to reconstruct your destroyed body on the material plane.”

It even knew about my medical knowledge that also begged the question.

“Did you take my memories?” I asked.

“No”

“Can they be recovered?”

“No”

“But you know both my true name and my past?” I asked.

“Yes”

“Telling me would break me?” I asked.

“Yes, no more questions we must begin before you begin to lose yourself to this plane.” I wanted to argue but I had little desire to stay here. And if I wasn’t actually dead so much the better.

“Very well. One last question. Is this how I ended up in that forest?” I asked.

“The process was similar.” it said, actually sounding annoyed.

So, it wasn’t the first time I had gone through this process. I still wanted to ask more but thinking back to how I wondered for seemingly days with no care for how much time passed halted me. I would have to wait, but I would see this creature again if it’s the last thing I do.

I pictured my elven body, trying to hold in my mind the image of all its organ systems together as a whole organism. My mind focused on that as much as I could, ridding myself of anything other thought. Cells tissue, bone even ethic strength I tried to visualize in the ether I needed a body strong enough to anchor my soul. I focused as much as I could on the concept. Then I started to feel living ether, leaving my body.

I had to assume that was the creature using my own abilities to rebuild me. I held the image in my mind for what felt like hours. Trying to refine my concept as much as possible. Finally, the flow stopped, and it said.

“It is finished, you will soon feel your body begin to pull on you as the bond is forged. Do not fight it, let it guide you.” It said, sounding relieved.

“My thanks I suppose.” As soon as I said that I could feel myself being pulled. It wasn’t a direction, just something pulling on me.

“I feel it.” I said.

“Why did you help me?” I asked.

Nothing.

“Will I ever learn what the real reason I am here is?” I asked.

“In time provided you have the will. There is more to magic than the simple drop you have learned.”

“It is time your body calls to you.” It almost sounded sad.

“I suppose this is goodbye until I see you again.” The pull was quite strong now and I barely had enough strength to keep myself here.

“Goodbye, Betrayer” it said.

What?

I bolted upright, angry that it decided to say that before I left. I looked at my surroundings and nothing had changed. I was naked and a few feet away from me was my armor lying in a pile of ash. It didn’t even seem that much time had passed.

I checked my body, while I certainly felt good there wasn’t that great rush of power that I was expecting. Noire glanced at me and my charred remains confused and I just shrugged at her.

“It’s not as if I know what’s going on either.” I said.

I got up and walked over to my clothes, I reached down getting ready to clean it of my remains. Until I felt warmth in my chest, then it started to progress burning.

“Well shit” I said looking at my chest there was no light glowing under my skin, so it had to be what I expected.

I was actually glad I was in pain; it meant all those souls didn’t die for no reason. Then I started screaming and thrashing as the pain skyrocketed beyond normal agony. As my mind slowly lost focus on reality, the one prevailing thought that kept looping over and over what the creature said before I left.

Betrayer, he called me. What did he mean and who did I betray? Why did he say that the instant before I left, just to taunt me? Then the creature’s advice popped into my mind. There is more to magic than just the drop I had learned. I suppose after my business in the capitol it would be time to see the elves.

The last thought I had before I lost my mind completely to the pain was, ‘Damn, why didn't I make myself taller.’