The Loneliest Ballad

24 May, 1368. St Ivan's Palace, Islia

Lady Sabine's face was a picture of wide eyed horror when Celia confessed her plans to her.

"My lady, you're not serious about this. You can't even be thinking about it! Please tell me you're not!"

"Of course I'm serious." Celia replied calmly. "The kingdom needs an heir, doesn't it? Otherwise, the future rests solely on Tobin's shoulders."

That wasn't strictly true, she supposed. Tobin had two elder sisters, neither of which resided at court. Still, the country had no precedent for a reigning queen. And as far as Celia was aware, neither of the sisters had children of their own.

The House of Tralhamir didn't seem to be particularly fertile stock.

So yes, it was definitely up to Celia to save herself.

"All I'm asking you is to accompany me to speak with a healer or two." Celia tried to sound reassuring. "I'm not asking you to perform dark magic or anything forbidden like that."

"Why do you need my company at all for that?" Sabine's eyes flicked nervously as if they were surrounded by spies, even in the quiet of Celia's bedchamber.

"Because if anyone should ask, I can simply say I was accompanying you while you sought remedy for an ailment."

Sabine frowned, clearly displeased with the explanation. She tugged nervously at one of her russet coloured braids. "I see. And what ailment do I allegedly need a cure for, my lady?"

"Sabine…" Celia started, determined to pull rank. Was she not a princess? Did her ladies serve her or not? Then she sighed and said quietly, "I wouldn't do this, or ask for your help, if I weren't truly desperate. You know how miserable I am. A child would bring peace of mind for both me and for Havietten in general."

Sabine frowned thoughtfully, her thoughts clearly at war. She was nobly born but her aristocratic family, the Irdens, had recently fallen on hard times. She'd know the only way to lift her station in life was going to be through an advantageous marriage. But no one would seek her as a bride if her name was tainted by allegations of witchcraft.

On the other hand, if her mistress became the exalted mother of an heir to the throne, Sabine's status as her favourite lady-in-waiting would also rise and make her more attractive for the marriage market.

After taking a deep breath and murmuring what sounded like a quick prayer, Sabine gave her a resolute stare. "Alright, Your Grace. I'll help you with this. Only because I know you're driven by noble intentions for our country, and not your own selfish wishes."

Celia almost pointed out that she was thinking less about the good for her adopted kingdom and more about preserving her own neck, but she didn't. The important thing was that her friend was agreeing to aid her.

"I'll introduce you to a few of the healers but no more than that. The rest is up to you, my lady. I don't want to hear or know what you talk about or what happens afterwards."

"Of course. You have my word." Celia nodded quickly. "I actually think it's better that way. Because if someone were to ever question you, you'd be able to answer with complete honesty that you know nothing about what was discussed."

"When did you want to do all this, my lady?" Sabine winced slightly, as if fearing Celia's reply.

"Tomorrow morning."

Sabine sagged visibly at the prompt response. "I was afraid you'd suggest something like that. Don't you think it's wise to take a little more time to think it through?"

"What do you think I've been doing for the last few days? Living a life of tedium gives you plenty of time to think, I can promise you that." Celia gave her a sardonic smile. "Every month that passes makes my position weaker. I can't afford to just keep waiting and praying for salvation. I must seize it with my own hands."

Sabine's face was a chalky white from fear. "How will we do this?" she whispered.

"I'll meet you in my presence chamber at the stroke of six in the morning. There will be no servants around because everyone knows my husband sleeps late and refuses to be disturbed before he rises." Celia tried to not let her face scrunch up in disgust when speaking of Tobin's laziness. He was Sabine's future king, after all.

The lady-in-waiting frowned. "But if you rise from your bed early, won't His Highness notice your absence?"

Celia smirked. "Don't worry about that. My lord husband sleeps like the dead, so he won't notice. Nothing can wake him from his slumbers."

Except for probably the scent of food, Celia thought scathingly. If a sleeping Tobin caught even a whiff of a meal's aroma, he'd likely leap from his bed as if his life and crown depended on it.

Again though, she didn't tell Sabine that. She didn't want her friend to think of her as some bitter young woman who felt nothing but disdain for her husband.

She wanted Sabine - and everyone else - to think of her as nothing but as an endlessly loyal princess trying to do her best for her subjects.

"Most of the courtiers will still be in bed, so it'll be easy for us to move through the palace unnoticed. All you have to do then is introduce me to the healers and let me make a decision on which one can help me the best. As soon as I have what I need, I'll return to my rooms well before Tobin awakens and the servants arrive to attend to us."

Sabine's throat bobbed repeatedly. Celia almost grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her.

Why are you being so timid, she wanted to shout? It's me taking most of the risk, not you! And if I can stomach it, then you'd better stomach it too, goddamnit!

But Celia said none of that. She just gave Sabine a gentle smile and thanked her again for being willing to help.