ALL NOVEL Chapter 37
32. The knight or the gainer mourns.
Since I was thirteen, I’ve also been able to think a little bit about whether I’m a farmer following the board all year round or not.
My father is also starting to say, “If you really want to go that way, I won’t stop you.”
As I tell myself, if you’re a knight to my father, hey, even if such a desperate princess becomes a queen, there’s no shame in risking her life to protect her. It’s a waste of our taxes, even if that happens, dying falls, even if it’s just a soldier. My father didn’t try to wave me the fist I held.
My dad gave me up, too.
I gave up on you, too.
It really hurts me that I’m less than fucking human.
I want to be, groaning that I want to be
Say nothing,
No effort at all,
I don’t try to do anything.
It’s an embarrassment to my father, a scumbag who can’t do it.
I wish I could just die like this.
Many times I thought of that, and each time there was a little “I wanted to die a knight if I were to die anyway” from the back of my chest, and I stabbed the violin into the field to strike it off.
“Hurry up and ask the Knights Commander for help.”
“We don’t have time for this. Quick, get the Knights to help the recruits.”
The hustling hooves and the screaming pass in front of the field in large quantities.
When I cared and accidentally looked, it was the Knights.
Just looking at that knight’s uniform hurts my chest.
An awesome number of Knights rode horses and passed. Mouthfully shouting “Knights Leader” and “To Support”.
“My father…?
And with this day at the border, my life is going to change dramatically.
……
Knights’ Operations Conference Room.
Once upon a time, when I was a kid, my father and Clark brought me on a tour.
One day you will be here, and I will remember my father’s face proudly speaking.
When I told him it was my father’s body, the gatekeeper gave me a meaningful look and stayed inside.
I miss it.
I didn’t think you were going to come here, thinking you couldn’t possibly come again.
Well, I can’t stop thinking about what the knights just said. My mother lied to me, and I had to go home as soon as I could make sure it was right.
It was when I opened the door to the Knights’ Ops conference room with that in mind.
It’s just a purposeful voice, and you don’t even realize that I came in here nailed to video of all the Knights floating around.
When I looked at the footage with the knights, it was my father who was there.
‘Unfortunately, I seem to be this far. You asked for the rest of me, Clark. It’s time for a few ambushers to come down with a halt to the attack from this side. As a knight to the end…’
“What the… it…
Unexpectedly, my voice leaked.
My father, why…
“So far,” he says, “at the end of the day.”
I didn’t know what that meant.
The knights set me up and Clark stopped it, fluttering and I approached my father’s footage to see if it was real.
Why are you there?
My father in the footage is rarely surprised, but I can’t believe what he just said, as much as I don’t care.
The Knights passed the field, what is this zama, no matter how many shouts of joke my father never came back to say anything.
No, no, no, no. I can’t believe my dad died here.
“Stand up, goddamn father. Go home and apologize a thousand times to your mother.”
My father finally opened his mouth when he shouted like that.
‘I’m sorry… that’s impossible. I die here as a knight. At least… I’ll give you another audition.
“There’s no such thing as an archery of knights. I told you I would never do anything to knights.”
I scream desperately, wanting to reject my father’s words, which I say as if this were the end of the line.
I don’t know if you’re a knight, I don’t do archery, but if only you could live.
I lean down and desperately look away from reality.
No, I don’t like my father dying.
‘Right…… your life. As I told you before, I’m not going to strongly stop you from not going for a knight anymore. I just wanted you to know… how my people and people risked their lives to be knights…. as my father.
Still, the voice of my father, who speaks to me, seemed so spicy and sad that I had never heard it before. I couldn’t hear that voice, and when I leaned down and shut up, I heard them not my father this time.
“Looks like we’re out of ammo at last, huh? Let me take care of this.
If you look up, they’re probably the ones attacking my fathers. They wanted to stop by and surround my father.
As soon as that was done, Clark had him cut off communication.
“Hey Clark, what…”
“We need information about our enemies, but we can’t give them anything from here.
Clark says cold to me trying to catch him.
You’re lying, aren’t you? Clark’s my dad’s best friend, and he’s an old daddy… and yet, how can you be so calm?
I thought so, and when I stared at Clark, my fist shaking quietly, my blood seeping in.
Why…
Both Gorotsuki laugh at his father.
I was wondering if my legs were hazy and I couldn’t move, and he said it was dumb.
Of the Knights, making fun of my father.
Yet my father tells us to turn our backs on us so we don’t care.
“There are future recruits ahead. I’m not going to let you serve until backup arrives.
Right now, you’re not the other way around, are you?
You can’t get away with this, can you? You can’t move, can you?
Why can’t you just let it be nothing like that?
‘So watch, my son. of my father as a knight… the last living. ”
My father waves his sword at the same time as that word.
For the first time in my life, I saw it, it was the back of my fighting father.
Vibrant, powerful, without a moment’s stray.
It’s my dad’s back I’ve been dreaming about since he was a kid.
I wanted to line up on that back and fight.
And what am I doing now?
In a place like this, you can’t do anything, you can just watch.
My father had many opponents, and as soon as he was bundled up and jumped, my father began to be pushed.
It conveys this much willingness to put a sword on one father, a gun, and kill him.
My father will be killed.
I would have screamed if I had noticed.
“Don’t be ridiculous, Father. I didn’t admit I was going to die.” I’ll kill all of Temehe and the others. Stop, stop, stop. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. ”
I don’t know what I’m talking about myself.
All I could do was scream at you for being stupid, and you were going crazy.
I haven’t told my father anything yet.
Really, nothing.
Disappointed, frightened, given up, abandoned.
Yet my father told me to watch at last.
No, I don’t want to be watching.
I wanted to fight with you as a knight.
But I can’t tell him anymore. Nothing.
Quite frankly, I can only watch him get killed or my father.
This gradually fades into reality wondering if this is any bad dream or if the dream I had this morning would have been like this.
Only my helplessness is so resentful that I just want to kill it.
Pan.
The dry sound brought my head back to reality again.
My father’s leg was shot out.
My father on my knees tells me that I can’t get a gun.
Reaching out to my father, screaming for no reason, my hand rubbed through my father and fell straight across the video from body to body.
It won’t arrive…
Even one arm… I’m, like, nothing, nothing, nothing.
“Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”
Slap your fists on the floor and scream.
Looking back, there were many of them dressed as knights who admired so much in front of them.
“Somebody help me. I’m the leader of your group. I’m different. I’m special.”
My father is special.
Unlike scumbags like me, I have the best special abilities, powers and vessels as a knight. He’s the chosen one.
And yet, why am I living here,
If my chosen father had to be killed by those guys, wouldn’t he?
“Then help me, Father. Why are there so many knights and so many… why can’t anyone help Father?”
Somebody, somebody help me.
You can take my place.
I haven’t been able to say anything yet.
I haven’t been able to return anything.
I’ll do anything I can.
So I need your help.
My precious family.
Yet none of the knights moved.
Just like me, all I can do is stare at the father in the video.
A knight who didn’t want me to be could not even help one father.
My vision darkens.
My body is weak again and I can’t move.
No more… no one, no matter what
“It’s okay.
Bread.
Someone suddenly slaps me in the shoulder.
It’s okay, the word and its outfit are too inappropriate for this occasion, and I wondered if I was looking at it again with my face up.
Little girl with more kids than me with bright red wavy hair.
“Who are the people of my country, I will not let them be unhappy”
Pull out an incompatible sword and cleave a luxurious dress in front of you.
I don’t even know what’s going on or if this is real or something. It’s just that the kid speaks words that no one in the knight here ever said.
“Bring me to that battlefield.”
He raised his sword and shouted as if I were a scorched knight.
My father’s back overlapped.