Chapter 67
Those who suffer from the Tabernacle dream.
“… a… Mari… it’s me, j… r, breathe… so… ⁉”
Who…?
Blurred vision, not sure.
My breath is painful.
Let your body freeze… cold.
No matter how much you smoke, it doesn’t even reach the core of your body.
It’s bitter, and even if you want to come, you can’t help your hands and feet.
Somebody help me.
I should have been so, so ready.
Yet so scary.
I’m… scared to death.
I’m… scared to leave him.
I can see in the blurred vision that he’s finally the one in front of me when I can see the light water color.
It’s supposed to be painful, but it makes me laugh zero.
Woohoo… good to see you at the end.
My darling, my darling.
I’m sure he’s crying again.
You made someone so sweet cry over and over again because of me.
… live, sorry I couldn’t give it to you.
I wanted to live with you more.
When I loved you, I wanted to tell you a lot more.
How long have you been saving me?
It gave meaning to a life that had nothing and only made sense of living.
You saved me.
You gave me happiness.
It seemed good to be alive.
Please, please.
For me, live.
Because you’ve lived for me for years now.
Please, my share… may you be happy.
Somebody, please.
Stay with him.
Friends are good, love is good…. I don’t care if you love me more than I do.
Because he’s very clumsy and too pure.
Because once you decide, even if the destination is dark, you’re the kind of person who keeps running straight there forever.
Because I’m the one who sacrificed years and years and years and years and years and years.
All the time, because he’s the one who kept on enduring me by himself.
So, please.
This man who is too pure and knows nothing but to cut himself.
I wanted to tell you, that word.
I’m losing my voice, before I do.
Lots of love… and thanks for letting me love you.
With human happiness and a way of life.
That word with everything in it.
If there is a God, I want you to tell him on my behalf.
These words I wanted to convey to him from the bottom of my heart.
Because if you pass it on, I’m sure he can live without being imprisoned by me.
May he live happily ever after without me.
May you take care of yourself.
Please…
My vision darkens.
I won’t even be able to see the light water color that kept me so out of my eyes.
Woohoo…
At the very end… I wanted to tell you…
……
“Ma…, … a………………………………………………………………………… ⁉ …”
I was on the bed when I noticed.
I feel breathless and cold and I am reminded that it is real.
……… what was I dreaming about?
I can’t recall. It’s just that the pain that keeps my chest tight still remains.
Filled with regret, the pain in my dreams.
My breath hurts and I can’t think about it.
My vision is blurred and I don’t even know what I’m seeing in front of me.
Woohoo… I’m sure this is the last time.
Understand just that.
The sound and vision are blurred.
In fading consciousness again, I could see the light water color… I knew it was him, and I could laugh zero though it should be painful.
I don’t know… I remember somewhere, this feeling.
But… it’s good to see you at the end.
“Maria…”
My darling, my darling.