The World Has Become Kinder to Her

## Part 1: Why Have I Returned?  

Lotus Estelle, the illegitimate daughter of the Marquis of Estelle, and the Bahamur social circle’s one-night companion.  

She had earned such a humiliating title due to the sheer number of men she had met and slept with in high society, more than any other lady. Of course, it wasn’t like that from the beginning.  

It was about three years after Lotus debuted in society that people began to whisper such things. It was around the time when she abandoned all expectations for the Bahamur aristocracy and the world itself.  

Lotus could barely remember her mother’s face. Her mother had been a maid in the Marquis household, and Lotus was born as a result of the drunken marquis mistakenly lying with her.  

The marquis handed the maid a considerable sum of money and cast her out. He likely thought he could forget about them entirely, but life didn’t go as he planned.  

When Lotus turned seven, the maid fell gravely ill. In her dying state, she brought her child back to the marquis’ mansion.  

The marquis and his wife must have wanted to throw the mother and daughter out immediately. But at that time, Crown Princess Irene, who was known as a saint, visited the marquis’ wife, and that became their greatest misfortune.  

— “Oh my, this child…”  

The crown princess recognized Lotus as the marquis’ daughter the moment she saw her. No wonder, for Lotus closely resembled the marquis.  

Her light reddish hair, paler than roses, and her striking green eyes were a reflection of the Estelle family’s lineage, passed down through generations. Her features were reminiscent of a lotus blossom, and so her mother named her *Lotus*.  

Of course, the name *Lotus* did not suit her. Unlike the noble flower that blooms beautifully in mud, despite being born into the prestigious Estelle family, her life was miserable and lowly.  

It was a contradictory name. Lotus couldn’t understand why her mother had chosen such a name.  

— “Wayne, send this woman away at once…”  

If the marquis had given the order to the butler just a little sooner, how would her fate have changed? But before the marquis could finish his sentence, the maid cried out.  

— “I… I will die soon. She is your child, only seven years old. Please show her mercy and take her in.”  

Her voice was shockingly loud for someone at death’s door. The maid, having poured out her final strength, collapsed, and three days later, she passed away.  

With the crown princess’ intervention, Lotus was officially registered as a member of the marquis’ family. While the crown princess might have thought she was doing a good deed by helping a poor little girl, it was far from a blessing for Lotus.  

Lotus became an unwelcome burden in the Marquis household. The marquis, forced to live with the embodiment of his shame, despised her immensely. While she was given better food and clothes than she had when living with her mother, none of it made her happy.  

— “Ah, how unfortunate for the lady of the house.”  

— “To be born with the same hair and eyes as the marquis…”  

— “Maybe it’s the half-commoner blood in her, but she seems different from the other noble ladies. A bit… lacking, I’d say.”  

— “Even so, she bears the name of Estelle. It’s embarrassing.”  

Lotus was not only coldly treated by her father and stepmother, the marchioness, but she was also looked down upon and ridiculed by the servants who worked in the household.  

In her naive hope, Lotus believed that once she debuted in society and left the marquis’ mansion, she would be able to breathe freely in a different world.  

Was she really so naive, as the maids and servants gossiped?  

The Bahamur social world was far more ruthless and cruel than the Estelle household. The noble aristocrats, in their elegance, trampled on those beneath them with calculated grace.  

— “Oh my, Lady Estelle. Your taste is simpler than I expected. You’ve worn the same debutante dress and accessories as usual, I see.”  

Her debutante ball, which should have reflected the prestige of the Estelle family, was shabby and unremarkable. Lotus endured countless thinly veiled insults wrapped in polite words.  

Rikheus Hycen, the sole heir of the esteemed Hycen Duchy, and a man known for his manners and grace, saved her from even greater humiliation by offering her the first dance.  

That single act of kindness from Rikheus was enough to steal Lotus’ heart.  

She fell for Rikheus, but as the illegitimate daughter of a marquis, she had no right to approach him. All she could do was watch him from afar.  

After pleading with the Marquis of Estelle to let her dress more lavishly and attend tea parties and banquets, Lotus found herself ridiculed once again—this time for overstepping her station by adorning herself so extravagantly.  

No matter what she did, she remained an outsider among the ladies. Thus, she began spending more time with the young men. At least they showed her interest and treated her kindly.  

It was all due to her singular, undeniable asset: her appearance. Her striking red hair, which seemed to be made of flower petals, and her vibrant green eyes were so captivating that once you saw them, you were drawn in.  

With her dazzling looks, calm demeanor, sensual allure, and intelligent presence, Lotus was recognized by everyone as a true beauty.  

— “Lady Estelle, you’re breathtakingly beautiful today as always.”  

— “There is no flower more beautiful than you.”  

The young men praised Lotus’s beauty and vied for her favor. They showered her with sweet words, expensive dresses, and luxurious accessories.  

Lotus believed they genuinely liked her. She was the only one who didn’t realize the truth, until one night when the young heir of the infamous Count Beyond family, known for his licentious ways, cornered her in a secluded part of the garden and tried to force himself on her.  

— “W-What do you think you’re doing?!”  

— “Shh! No need to act coy. When you smiled and flirted with me, this is what you were after, wasn’t it? Don’t tell me… you’re a virgin?”  

— “You… you’re insane!”  

— “Heh, foul-mouthed, aren’t you? A rose with thorns, I see. No matter. If this is your first time, I’ll be extra gentle. Trust me, once we’ve done it, you’ll be the one clinging to me.”  

Never before had Lotus cursed the fact that she was born a woman as much as she did in that moment. No matter how hard she fought, her strength as a woman wasn’t enough to fend off the count’s heir.  

Was this really how it would end? As she despaired, a man approached.  

— “Remove your hands. Can’t you tell she doesn’t want this?”  

— “W-Who the hell… K-Kenneth…”  

— “Attempting to rape a defenseless woman. I have no desire to hear my name spoken by filth like you.”  

Kenneth Zahard, a prodigious swordsman who had distinguished himself from a young age.  

Only three years older than her, he was already a veteran who had participated in numerous wars and had achieved countless military accomplishments. It was expected that he would soon be awarded the title of count or higher.  

Handsome like a sculpture but cold and aloof, Kenneth was known as the *Knight of Ice*. On that night, he came to Lotus’s aid. Perhaps it was a fleeting whim or a moment of pity.  

The heir of Count Beyond didn’t dare oppose Kenneth and quickly fled. Lotus barely managed to thank Kenneth for saving her.  

— “Thank you for your help, Sir Zahard.”  

— “Would you like me to escort you back to the banquet hall?”  

— “…No. I just want to go home.”  

— “Then I’ll escort you to your carriage.”  

— “That’s… unnecessary. I didn’t come here in my family’s carriage.”  

That was a lie. Lotus rarely had the luxury of using the marquis’ carriages for personal events like tea parties, banquets, or balls.  

Though the Marquis’ estate had three carriages, none of them were at her disposal. For personal outings, Lotus had to rent a carriage, a fact that reflected her low standing in the household.  

— “In that case, I’ll hail a carriage for you.”  

Kenneth responded in his usual indifferent tone, and Lotus gratefully leaned on his nonchalant kindness to return safely to the Marquis estate. It seemed that their connection would end there.  

— “I have a favor to ask of you, Count Owen. Unless you have over a hundred reasons to refuse, would you be the one to take my first time?”  

If Lotus hadn’t sought him out with this brazen request, they likely would never have met again.  

— “What… did you just say?”  

— “Don’t worry, you didn’t mishear me. You might be reluctant because I’m a filthy illegitimate child, but I can guarantee one thing. Unlike the other noble ladies who flaunt their purity but have already lost it, I am still a true virgin.”  

Yet, the sliver of pride Lotus had left made her wish that her first time would be with someone relatively decent.  

By the time two years had passed since her debut into high society, Lotus came to a realization. A girl like her, after gaining recognition in the social world, was in the perfect position to be married off as a second wife to a wealthy family.  

She had to make a choice: would she let herself be sold off to some appropriate noble household, or would she become the queen of the night, holding power over men?  

She chose the latter. Before offering herself to any man, she sought out Kenneth, now Count Owen, and pleaded with him to spend a night with her.  

It was a decision she made because, aside from her unrequited love for Rikheus, Kenneth was the man she liked the most.  

Using her beauty and smile to sway men, Lotus became known among the nobles as the *one-night companion* of the Bahamur social scene and a disgrace.  

It was a degrading title, but she preferred ruling as the queen of the night over being married off to an old man with a huge age gap.  

Among the men Lotus became involved with were heirs of influential families, and when they applied subtle pressure on the Marquis of Estelle, it became difficult for him to marry her off easily.  

Lotus believed she had made the best choice for herself—until she heard the words of the one she had always kept in her heart, Rikheus, the prince.  

— “Could it be that Prince Hycen also fancies women like Lady Estelle?”  

— “Well, Lady Estelle is certainly beautiful.”  

— “Oh my.”  

— “But her crudeness, which is no different from a woman of the streets, doesn’t align with the kind of beauty I seek.”  

At a banquet, she happened to overhear Rikheus’s true feelings. The shock was immense.  

Even he, who was known for his kind heart, thought of her that way. If that was what he thought, what more could she expect from others?  

She felt utterly wretched. Waves of despair swallowed her whole.  

She didn’t expect to be loved by him; she only wished not to be hated.  

But his voice, dripping with disdain, relentlessly shredded her heart.  

Unable to bear her tattered emotions, she resolved to end her life. Lotus threw herself into the great Venous River that flowed through the capital.  

That should have been the end.  

“Why…?”  

Why was she still alive now?  

Her heavy eyelids opened unconsciously, and she found herself in a familiar room. It was small and shabby, far from what one would expect from the bedroom of a noble marquis’ daughter.  

It seemed that some meddlesome passerby had saved her near the river.  

Her lips, followed by her shoulders, began to tremble uncontrollably. Why, why would anyone bother to save her?  

“Huh, h-huh…”  

Suddenly, a wave of sorrow overcame her. She couldn’t live as she wanted, nor could she die as she wished.  

In this world, it felt as if her thoughts, her feelings, her very will didn’t matter at all.  

The darkness outside was thick and oppressive. It was likely night or perhaps early dawn.  

Not that it mattered—no one ever came near this place, no matter the time. Alone in the silence and the stillness of the night, Lotus cried tears of anguish.  

She wasn’t sure how long she had been crying when suddenly—*knock knock*—a sharp knock at the door sent a jolt of fear through her chest.