This Is Where I Want To Be

189. Rocks

Chris

“More light, over here… No! Closer… Set up one of those tripods in each section of the wall. At every door that seems to be connected to a room.” I gestured with an outstretched finger.

The man in front of me glanced down into the dark corridor stretching before us. “We are going to need a lot more lights.” He commented.

“I want everything cataloged… When you’re done here, go back to En-gannim, gather all the books that might have similar markings on the covers.” The man agreed, and we both looked towards the tunnel entrance. The business of the other Vampires had caught my eye. They put down tables and chairs, creating an area where we would work. The carvings on the wall were complex and in the same ancient werewolf script that the book I found had on the cover. Since Marcus and Caleb had found Brylee’s vault on Palmyra, it had been in the back of my mind. All the secrets that could be hidden down there were too important to let go. So I decided to go and see what they had found. I immediately recognized some of the writings the Werewolves had carved out in the stone and knew the answers I was looking for would be there.

When Brylee infected humans, turning them into bitten Werewolves. She had to have kept them somewhere. The space down in that mountain was secure enough. What was behind the doors? I couldn’t figure out what she could be hiding. What if the doors opened, and there were more of them? Or worse, something else like them. As the lights flickered around me, my gaze drifted over the space. The chamber we were in was a large area built and created at the mountain’s base. I took a few steps closer to the first stone wall glistening in the water. I rubbed over the mossy area I was trying to translate. My eyes followed the source of the water up to the roof. We were standing in a place drowned underwater not long ago. For some time, the men and I tried to stop the constant drip running down the inscriptions, but nothing wanted to make it cease. Reconciled to the working conditions, I forged on with translations. It was harder than I had anticipated, and it didn’t help that my mind was unfocused. I wasn’t getting anywhere and wished Soren was there. It felt like… he was the missing link in our group. Not that I would admit that to anyone. Or let Juliet near him.

My thoughts wandered from Juliet and Soren to how useless I had become. Watching the men carry the equipment, knowing I couldn’t even help. Picking up a chair seemed too difficult for me. I had to ask others to do everything for me. I didn’t know why my strength seemed to be failing me. I had been fine the few previous days on Earth. Without my abilities, I was futile in so many ways.

Marcus was still on the battlefield. Louis had left us to see how Juliet was faring. Liam and Samuel had taken control of The Tower. I had decided to make some decisions of my own. However, if Soren was there, he could’ve taken over the role of uncovering all the secrets the planets were still hiding from us. Regardless, I was the one that lost his powers, and Soren wasn’t there. I feared for Isla and him on that Island with Ian. I was the one that had placed her there. I promised myself as soon as Caleb came back, I would ask him to go and get them… if it wasn’t too late. They could be dead… What then?

Marcus and everyone were encouraging me. They were sure that I would get my abilities back. I just didn’t want to wait till after the war. Who knew when the dust on En-gannim would settle?

I peeked down at the book in my hand, glancing over the pages quickly only to lift my eyes back up at the wall, finding nothing that wanted to bring the picture together. I thought about going to Earth to get waterproofing to seal the roof. Gather some archeologists and bring them to help. The lead scientists Juliet had used to find me stood at another section. His team was behind us at a table, making no more progress than me. The problem was the paper. We couldn’t let them get wet and needed to protect the books while we worked, trying to manage a plate in the other hand to translate. I closed my eyes and rubbed them with the back of my hands. It had been a long day… I needed that boy to put the books on plates. It was awful how we were all using him! How I wanted him there for my own gain. The only one not manipulating him was Juliet. She had no choice but to stay away from him. I didn’t know what she would do if she found out Soren and Isla were stranded on that Island.

Another question plaguing me was what Beatrice had said about the time travel. Was she serious? If my teleportation swatch could make me go back in time? Would that even be a possibility? After everything, I didn’t disregard the time travel as quickly as Juliet had. I wanted to know how it would work or if my going back in time would be the only way for me to “find” myself—one hell of a self-discovery. No one knew what I was thinking. Louis wasn’t there. The only person left to talk to was….

***

The doors to Juliet’s room slid open. Liam and Samuel were sitting on the balcony. They were both puffing away on a cigarette. I chuckled. It had to run in the family. Liam glanced over his shoulder. “Chris!? Where have you been?”

“I need to talk to you, Liam,” I said with some urgency in my voice.

“It’s serious if the one man comes and talks to me that never asks for permission. Or advice. Or anything. Not even to chat.”

“Should I leave?” Samuel asked.

“No, please stay.” I held out a hand.

Samuel turned in his seat and put his feet back up on a stool.

“I have been in those tunnels. On Palmyra.”

“Have you found anything?” Samuel asked.

“I might have. It’s difficult to be sure, but I think we need that stone.”

“The one Charlene has?”

“Yes.”

“What will it do?”

“I don’t know. Samuel, do you know anything about the stones? Why do all the planets have different ones with supernatural abilities?”

“I have no clue. We all thought it was an emblem of sorts. The one who had it was the one you bowed to. It is how it’s been in my lifetime.”

“And when you found out about the brandings? How did you know to use the emblem of each house? It’s not like Marcus needed that stone to do it.”

“No… On Earth, we had plates. All the creatures not on the compound needed one for identification.”

“Plates? Juliet’s and Louis’s plates. So that’s why he gave them to her! I didn’t have one.”

Samuel and Liam shared a glance. “You were a special case. Everyone knew who you were.”

“Samuel didn’t even tell me… his own brother, that there was no such thing as a hybrid. He lied to all of us.” Liam said. “We didn’t even know other species existed. You were as much of a surprise to us as to yourself.”

Samuel shrugged. “When those of us… Vampires and Werewolves needed to tell someone they were important. You gave them a plate. So others would know not to cross that line. It was an inside secret.”

“Soren’s Emblem, though. It was not steel and had nothing to do with identification. Wasn’t it something from Earth as well? And Liam could make me one, and it would’ve worked.” I rambled.

“The brandings have nothing to do with the stones,” Samuel said. “Nor the plates. It’s the same as your swatches, Chris. We make what we want, but the people make it work. The conditions, if you will. I think it has to do with the fire more than anything else. No one ever understood it. We sure didn’t. Suppose I didn’t find out about the brandings before we were exiled. None of it would’ve happened.” Samuel leaned forward and pushed his bud into the ashtray. “Look, the Ahmeds had to have known about Earth for a long time. For them, the scenery and animals were just more doodles to work with.”

“So what? Steel for brandings and leather for swatches?”

Samuel shrugged again. “Maybe?”

“I don’t know, Chris. Why are you so bent up on this?” Liam stood to his feet and moved past me into the room. He sat down on Juliet’s bed and pulled on his shoes. “We have to get back downstairs. There isn’t time for this. And it would be best if you were where you’re supposed to be. With us in that command room. The more eyes and ears we can trust, the better.”

I did feel guilty. Juliet wasn’t there to make sure we were helping Marcus. It was the deal. “I’m thinking about going back in time to get my powers back.”

Neither of them batted an eye. Liam tied his last lace, and Samuel scoffed. “What? Your brother didn’t tell you about other species, but you both know about time travel.”

“Juliet would have to be dead before you can go back,” Samuel said.

“What? Why?” I asked.

“You didn’t think you could go at any time.”

“I was hoping.”

“It’s for that specific event, to find her again, to save her... Or so we believe. Chris, we don’t have time to sit and figure out all of these theories. The things you want to know are hidden away, and you will have to wait to understand them. It is supernatural. Accept that, and the rest will fall into place.”

I just stood there, staring at Samuel. All my ideas and wishes were washed away and replaced with more frustration.

“How do you know those stones aren’t exactly what we need? If you needed your daughter branded to push down Qadir. What did Ahasuerus’s predecessors need to win wars?”

Samuel pushed his finger into my chest. “You have to calm down. You’re going to cross a line.”

I guiltily glanced at Liam. He had no choice in what he did. We still didn’t know why the vamps bent the knee. Liam had gambled with the idea of the brandings. “I’m sorry.” I raked my hand through my hair.

“Chris, how many of those swatches are there?” Liam asked.

I couldn’t answer him.

“One… I only know because I asked Beatrice after you put another tattoo on my daughter. I did my homework.”

“Only one? But Beatrice said she had seen it before.”

“And how old is Beatrice?” Liam asked.

“Anyway. How would you go back if you can’t teleport? And how will you go back even if you could?” Samuel interjected.

“Practice. I supposed… If my grandfather had to practice, to travel across the freaking galaxy. I would’ve trained for it.”

“For that to even work, you need your powers.” Samuel clapped my shoulder.

“Argh! This doesn’t make sense. Why would Beatrice tell you one thing and me just some of it?”

“Has anything ever?” Liam stood up and walked up to me. He rested a hand on my shoulder. “Rather, tell me how you’re doing. Are you at least feeling stronger?” Our eyes locked, and I was quiet. I wasn’t resting and doing my exercises or training. I wanted a quick fix. I didn’t want to take the long road to recovery. “You have to keep your eye on the ball.” Liam tried to calm me down.

“I am Liam. And your daughter is out there, and I can’t get to her.” I shrugged out of both their hands and turned away from them. “Fahan is on that rock that seems to be the key to everything, and eventually, Ian will end up there, and then what will we do? Give them all the secrets.”

“They don’t have the stone. Charlene does. By the time Miné is old enough to take over. We would’ve figured out how to make them leave. She can bring all the Werewolves back, and we will fight another war.”

“I don’t understand why you young people from Earth don’t like the fighting. It’s not like we have anything else to do.” Samuel said. Liam laughed lightly, agreeing with his brother.

“I know there must be more places to mine all these stones. Just like on Zoreah for the Embossing. I also know that these stones are what will save us. A lot of women worked on the swatches. And Ahasuerus didn’t just keep his for no reason. It wasn’t only for identification. No one on En-gannim has stones!”

Both men shook their heads, done talking to me. “Why don’t you take Aries back? Work on relations in that way.” Liam suggested.

“Don’t change the subject. Don’t shrug me off as Marcus did with you. Juliet felt a connection to En-gannim and Palmyra. But nothing on Zoreah. And I know the secrets to make Ian bend are down in those tunnels.”

“Okay, fine…” Samuel said, putting his hands into his pockets. “Let’s play this out. If the stones on Palmyra give you birth tattoos. Another one can make you time travel. What do you think the stone around Marcus’s neck can do? Or the one Charlene has.” Samuel asked.

“What other stones do we know about?” Liam asked.

The three of us stilled and turned to each other. The realization had dawned. We all had come to the same conclusion. Before we could say what we were thinking, our focus was abruptly pulled away. My eyes drifted up toward the roof. Lights were flashing in the corner of the room. No sound. No alarm blaring. Only a dim pink light blinked brightly. Samuel hurried towards the door. Liam was short on his heels.

“How do you think they figured it out?”

“Let’s hope they haven’t and that Marcus and the stone are safe… It’s not an alarm for an attack. It’s a planetary siren.”

“A signal? For what?” I asked, stepping into the teleporter.

“That everyone must stop what they are doing and prepare for the worst.”

***

The three of us moved quickly over the threshold of Juliet’s office. The generals had gotten reports that the fighting had ceased and were celebrating. “This isn’t good… That’s not the worst that could happen.”

“Where the hell is Marcus?” Liam roared over the cheers.

The whole room fell quiet. “He got a message from Ian. Who wanted to talk.” Samuel and Liam glanced nervously at each other. “Marcus sounded the alarm and left. You just missed him. Ian had asked that the fighting would stop for the time being. Sort of a cease-fire, and Marcus gave the order to fall back and regroup our troops.”

Liam spun around in haste. “I’ll be back. Samuel, find out where they are. Get Marcus out of there! If they get their hands on that stone! Who knows what they will be able to do!”

Liam disappeared out the door. I stared after him just as I had when Jessy jumped into Selena’s arms. Everyone was able to help in some way. I hated being unable to be with Juliet whenever I wanted—not having the strength to do anything.

***

Lyla

Nevin had finished packing the two backpacks and placed them on the back seat. He tossed the car keys at me and plopped into the passenger seat. I stood staring at him. “Why are you just standing there? Are we going or not? You changed your mind?”

“I… have a dog,” I said, wavering. “She’s stuck in my van at the campgrounds.”

“A dog?”

“I never thought I’d get this far. Or that I would go on wild adventures. I can’t just leave her.”

“You will have to take her with you. It would help if you emptied your van anyway. Don’t want them to take everything you have.”

I played nervously with the keys as I walked to the driver’s side. Nevin leaned forward and pressed a button on the dash. The garage doors opened behind us as I slid into the driver’s side. I had to adjust the seat for my short legs to reach the pedals and to be able to see over the bonnet.

We drove in silence for the short trip to fetch Gigi. I let her out, and she ran around like a maniac, upset at me, barking. It might not be the most brilliant move to take a little noisy, furry friend into the one place that could hear everything. I opened the back door, and Gigi hopped in. Nevin cooed at her, and she leaped into his lap. He opened his window. Gigi stuck her head out, tongue hanging out of her mouth while she panted, trying to catch her breath.

I paused before closing the boot, staring at everything I had put in there. Nevin might have been lying. All the evidence I had was in the car. If he had faithfully served for so many years, would he really let me steal secrets? Was I walking into a trap?

“Are you coming? She is a wild little thing.”

I slammed the boot and slid back into my seat. “You’re not going to kill me and make this problem disappear?”

“You are not a problem… Lyla. You want to know what happened to your sister. And after…” He paused, gazing into the distance. “I might use that key to see my daughter again. Why you didn’t try and trade with me in the first place is a little amateur.”

I smiled brightly. My sunny countenance back. I felt lighter and pushed my foot down on the gas. It would take us a while to get to where we were going.

***

“Here, slow down. There!” He pointed. “Do you see it?” My gaze darted over the landscape, but I couldn’t see anything but dried-out bushes and rocks. “You have to get off the road and move into that clearing,” Nevin agitatedly pushed his finger back and forth to a small patch of dirt.

“What do you mean? There is no way over there.”

He leaned over and pushed the steering wheel for me. The car jolted into oncoming traffic and off the road. “I thought you said a car can’t get in there,” I yelled, gripping the wheel with both hands, trying to get control as the car moved jerkily, skidding over the debris and sand.

“You wouldn’t be able to, but I can.”

The main road disappeared in the rearview mirror as a cloud of dust welled up behind us. My only way to civilization was gone. It was the horror movie moment where the girl was usually captured by deformed men living in caves. Never to be seen again. The reality of what we were doing was setting in. I was willingly walking into a place filled with the enemy. Who was I to go up against any of them? Did I not see her kill Marcus’s father? How could Marcus love her after that? She was about to kill Ahasuerus too. Why the Vampires fought for a whole planet was beyond my understanding.

“There.” Nevin pointed again.

“I see it.” There was indeed parking for any vehicle. And out of sight. Nevin opened his door. Gigi took the gap and jumped down to the ground. I picked up my purse and pulled out the key from the ignition. Nevin opened up the back door and grabbed the backpacks. He helped me get into one and fastened it around my chest and waist.

“Why are you so organized for this specific trip?”

“Runaways.”

“Runaways?”

“This path is the only way out if you don’t want to get shot. It gave those inside some hope of freedom.”

“It was suicide with you around,” I said softly.

“Yes… Running was probably only prolonged suicide. No one had ever escaped. If you didn’t leave out the front gate. You didn’t leave. I was in charge of dealing with anything that went on out here.”

“If you never let anyone slip through the cracks, why would you help me at all.”

“I like you! And who said I never did? If I had, for instance, come upon a young woman running away.”

“You mean Juliet.”

“Or my Willa. If she had only tried.” He was quiet, walking into the narrow passage, twisting his body to fit. Both of us scuffled through. My backpack protested and pushed my body tightly against the high walls of the gorge towering over us. We squeezed through sideways until the end of the narrow entrance to a small landing. The ground was even further down than the height of the rocky wall. It didn’t seem to bother Nevin, and he went on, “The thing is. I’ve never been inside the compound for long periods. And even there, no one knew what my job description was. It wasn’t like I could advertise.” He pushed his arm between the backpack and my waist and pulled me closer, Gigi in his other and bent his knees to jump before I could protest. I gasped as we landed on a small ledge not a few feet down. He looked at my face and laughed.

The rest of the way down went slowly, and then we walked and walked. Climbed so many rocky paths that I thought we would never get anywhere. The trail snaked a lot through the ridges, revealing different rock layers. The smooth sandy stretches at the bottom were the most comfortable. Still, they ended soon after announcing the upcoming rocky path we had to climb. Nevin carried Gigi in his arms and helped me as much as possible. He wasn’t the older man he portrayed to be.

“Too bad we can’t fly,” I said.

“Wouldn’t that be something?”

Nevin’s features were that of a stern old grandfather walking around with a whistle hanging from his lips. However, his personality was the total opposite. It made it difficult to figure him out. He was congenial in every way, politely kept the conversation going, treated me with respect, and even threw in a joke at some points in our discussions.

“May I ask you about Willa?”

“Yes. What do you want to know?”

“Why did you let her get married?”

Nevin’s features contorted for a second, “The man’s father was one of my friends back on our planet. We were all together in our ideals. The children that grew up under Qadir were… different in many ways.”

“Some of them. Marcus seemed to have blindsided all of you.”

“You’re right. He is still an enigma. When my Willa died, something changed in the compound. Most men hid their daughters away after that.”

“You mean Juliet.”

“Yes.”

“You have a soft spot for her.”

“How can I not? She had done what thousands of grown men couldn’t muster up the courage to do. And…”

“And?”

“My Jessy. He works for her. I know you think she needs to be held accountable, but I don't see it that way. Jessy has only the highest respect for her.”

“You make her sound like a regular Joan of Arc.”

“Well, soon, you’ll have to decide for yourself. When you watch that man’s life flash before your eyes.” Nevin got quiet. “Things are not black and white. It never will be.”

“Your son works for her? How closely?”

Nevin gave a small laugh. “Very.”

“What about your wife?”

Nevin didn’t answer me. He glanced up at the sky. “It’s going to be dark soon. We will have to camp. It would be best if you didn’t get hurt. There is a cave up ahead. It will have to suffice as a home for the night.”

I unclipped my pack and dropped it on the ground, putting off the flashlight in my hand. The darkness was almost deafening, yet so many sounds were coming from the depths. Nevin lit a small lantern and put it down on a small aperture. Gigi eagerly drank her water. I put some kibble on a stone, and she crunched away, wagging her tail, looking up at me with satisfied eyes between the bites she took.

“My wife is on En- Gannim.” Nevin said softly. “She was one of the first to leave when Louis took over.”

“Do you ever see her? And Jessy?”

“We do come together when he has some time off. A trip does only take ten minutes.”

I took a deep breath. The situation became more daunting with every minute that passed. Nevin was involved in Juliet’s life. It wasn’t six people away. For him, it was only a beloved son.

“So, will you tell me what else you want to unearth? It can’t only be to know what’s going on.” Nevin glanced up at me.

“I don’t think you will help me if I told you the truth.”

“You’re thinking about leaking every sin they have… It’s a long list. I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into.”

“You think I’ll die before she does.”

“I think you sound a lot like Qadir.”

My head snapped up, my eyes filled with disbelief. “How could you compare me to that monster?” Nevin stood up and rolled out small mats, laying down our sleeping bags. He tossed me a blow-up pillow. I put my lips over the plastic and blew air into the hole.

“The question you should ask yourself if you want to be honest. What is putting you in that position of power? Personal vendetta or fate.”

“Fate!? Then fate had made Juliet a murderer?”

Nevin’s eyebrows wrinkled together, and his forehead followed. “What are you talking about?”

“The other woman on the TV. Next to my sister.”

“I see… You think Juliet had a personal attack on her.”

“Do you deny it?”

“I do not wish to deny it! But if you murder her for that one, she will have to die four hundred times. Because by the time any vamp is eighteen, that’s how many people they have killed. All of us… I stopped counting.”

“You know how Juliet tried to clear away her explanation of my sister’s death? She tried to convince my father that if Lucy had slept with Michael and had a baby. Would they have let the child die? Or let the child drain people.”

“And?”

“Argh. You’re worse than she is.” Nevins’s shoulders shook as he stirred the fork in the little pot. My noodles were simmering on the little gas stove.

“You can go after her as much as you like. She’ll even respect you for it. Nevertheless, when it comes to her kids. You might feel her wrath. She’ll kill you your parents, and walk away, wiping her knife on her pants.

I shuddered at the thought, considering if I wanted to go on. I had never thought about them killing my parents. Wiping us off the face of the earth. I had to get all the information I was about to uncover to the others in our group. My father knew the risks and let me go anyway. My mother would never be the same. If it came to us all dying for Lucy. I was okay with that.

He nodded. “Juliet didn’t kill that Stevie woman. One of her children did?”

“Caleb?”

“You know him?”

“That fine-looking boy? As young as he is… hmph… She probably told him to kill her. Why?”

“Jealousy.”

“What! Took away someone’s mother because of what?”

Nevin pushed the pot in my direction. Slowly, I scooped a bundle of noodles with the fork. I blew on it before I thrust them into my mouth. He put another container on the little stove and poured water into it.

“I don’t think you want to understand how it feels to be half creature. And all of us have one weakness that can bring our lives to a crashing halt if we don’t govern it.”

The fork stilled in front of my mouth with the second bite. “Is that going to be everyone’s excuse?”

“Do you want to know how you control a vampire?”

I chewed and shrugged. “On our planet. The only way to condition that energy is like, have you ever seen the movie Water for Elephants? I stopped chewing. “I guess you think we could be trained like animals with love and care. And we can, to a degree… It just takes so much longer. However, we will always be half-animal. Juliet’s father had only fourteen years.” Nevin smiled. “It wasn’t enough. Juliet is nothing more than an infant in my world. She can’t be held accountable for every feeling in that small body of hers. The fact that they grew up among humans and never did anything is because she ate every week. Had to kill a person… Every week.”

My friends and I had done the math of the people that must have died for them to live for two hundred years. One more might not have meant anything to Juliet, but it tipped the scales for me. “Then I want to know why she could leave the compound at all! Why could she become queen if women get killed and maimed for the slightest indiscretion? What happened?”

Nevin poured me a cup of coffee and handed me the small blue plastic cup. “Well, there you have it. It’s the one secret the government and even I will fight tirelessly to avoid getting out.”

“So what? This was my last meal. To fish out what I knew and to kill me.”

Nevin's eyes penetrated mine, and his lip curved at one corner. “I won’t hurt you. But once you know, I don’t want to be you. And I won’t be able to help you then… I’m a middleman. Help wherever I can. Whoever needs help. It’s all I ever knew.”

***

The following day Nevin woke me up early. It was still dark, and we started walking with flashlights pointed at our feet. He had put Gigi in a makeshift sling he had concocted while I was sleeping. We ended up looking at the stars for a long time the previous night. He had shown me where En-gannim was in the darkness and little lights.

Nevin stopped, putting his hands on his hips. “Come. We’re here.” It seemed to be another cave because I didn’t notice anything that looked like an entrance. He took a few steps into the darkness. My feet couldn’t move. I had no idea what I was doing. I heard his keys jingle, the clanging of metal, and the creaking of hinges. There was a lot on that keychain of his. A car that could get you into the compound. A key to a gate of secrets. A teleporter waiting at the gas station. He stepped back out and let Gigi down. “No, don’t.” I protested.

Nevin held out a hand. “Leave her.”

She circled me and ran into the darkness, barking and whining. “Gigi!” I yelled after her. My feet were suddenly moving fast. I tried to catch up, but she was gone. “They will hear her. They will kill her.”

“There is no way. It’s too far down. Don’t worry. We will catch up eventually. It’s not like she can push elevator buttons.”

I just shook my head.