Ugly Bastard System

UBS70 – An Absurd Plan*



I am alive, although occupied with a lot of work. I will probably only be free from September.

Kinoshita Yuutaro was your average shut-in.

To be honest, he still had not fallen low enough to be labeled a NEET. He did work, after all. Although the terribly harsh and judging society did not consider going to Hello Work a proper job, especially for someone at 37 like him. What a terrible world. Work is work, and you should respect every one of them.

"That would be 6000 yen."
"Uh, t-thank you."

Kinoshita awkwardly walked out of the porn rental shop. What a rude jerk, he cursed. That bastard worked in an adult shop, and still dared to look at him with a judging eye?

But oh well, at least he got what he wanted.

Kinoshita Yuutaro had a really pathetic habit, which was consuming an absurd amount of porn. He sometimes even proudly claimed himself to be a porn connoisseur. You could tie his eyes with a thick cloth and make him hear 100 moans, and he could perfectly tell which one belonged to which AV actress.

He was returning with his great haul to the new home he recently moved to. The previous one... well, he was kicked out because of the complaints from those annoying neighbors. What exactly did he do wrong?

It was a complete coincidence that the girl in the 19 yo debut porn that he bought looked a lot like the neighboring college girl, and her parents did not like that at all. He just had the bad luck to drop the dvd right in front of the girl's father.

...Okay, maybe his porn selection got a little biased by how that girl looked, and boy oh boy, she was one hot tomboy. But that did not mean that he could gather the other neighbors and file a complaint to the landlord like that! He wanted to sue them, but he did not have the money to do that. And he would probably lose, just because his opponent was a pretty girl while he was an old ugly fat man. There truly was no justice in this world.

Still, he considered himself lucky that he got an apartment quite cheap a month ago. He heard that some dude died on the upper floor, and the prices fell a little. Unlucky that guy, and lucky him.

But you know what was the best part?

Damn, the neighboring lady was hot. Well, she looked like your typical housewife, but damn if she had one hell of a curvy body. The innocent look in her eyes made a terrific contrast. Damn, he could feel his blood pumping into his dick just by imagining her in bed.

And that is why he rented these two particular DVDs to help with his imagination. What DVDs, you ask? The first one is just a simple porn where a young frustrated houswife, whose husband is always busy with work, gets seduced by her neighbor and has crazy sex with him. Just the perfect one.

Well, he also found another one where the husband lets his boss and colleagues have fun with his wife to get out of debt. He took this particular one because the actress in this movie kinda had a similar dress style to his new neighbor.

"Hm hm hm~"

Usually he really hated climbing stairs, but today he was in a good mood thanks to the haul. And... wait what?

As he got up to the floor he was in, he saw the woman in question, Hanazono Sayuri, laying out the futon in the railing. She looked like the ideal model of a housewife, but today she looked a little solemn. Did something happen with her husband? He was sure he heard some kind of argument last night. He tried to strain his ears and probably heard something about three days, but that was all. Or... could it be...

Could it be that she was frustrated just like the porn? What if he really strained his ears or maybe tried using some gadget? Did she touch herself regularly to deal with it? Could he somehow record it and blackma—

He stumbled on his legs and fell.

"Ow! It hurts!"

"Ah! Are you al... ri... ght?"

"Huh?! I-I'm fine buhihi—?"

Why was she staring at him blankly like that? Kinoshita soon realized that she was not looking at him, but at the bag that dropped from his hand.

And both the DVD covers came out.

"Ah! This is! I-I can expla—"

Sayuri simply picked up the two cases and blankly stared, to the horror of the fallen guy.

"Huh."

That was the only word she said.

 


 

Sayuri looked at the two DVD cases with their revolting covers and the two titles.

She forcefully suppressed her smirk at the first one. Seduced by a neighbor, huh? Well, in her case, her husband was an absolute trash and she had no regrets. The second one really infuriated her at how close it was to what Satoshi requested from her last night.

She grabbed the second one with both her hands and snapped the whole box right in the middle.

"W-What are you doing?! I have to return that one—"

"SHUT. UP. OR I WILL CRACK BOTH OF YOUR NUTS JUST LIKE I CRACKED THE DISC."

"Hiiiiii—"

The man ran inside his apartment and closed the door tight. All of his illusions were broken! Women are scary! He was never going out, ever again!

Sayuri still had the first one. Well, she could tolerate this one. She looked at a bunch of screenshots on the back cover.

"Hm? Is the husband watching the deed on screen? What a loser."

She vaguely remembered a discussion she had a long time ago with Misaki.

"Sayuri. Is your husband really working under the scion of Tennouji?"
"Uh... yes? That's what he said if I remember correctly—Misaki? You look worried. Is everything alright?"
"Huh? Oh... its just... I once heard a weird rumor about that guy from one of my ex-colleagues at my previous law firm."
"W-What rumor?"
"Its... uh... he once said that he was visited by a potential client that claimed that his wife was raped by his boss, the same guy, and then blackmailed with a recording of it. Although he said that the guy one day came and asked to drop the case saying that it was a ploy from a rival company. It still bugged him a little, apparently."
"Eh? That is a viscious accusation you know? Corporate world sure is scary. But why did it bug him?"
"He said that the guy looked really frightened. He sniffed around and learned that this was not the first time this happened. There had been other men and women who came up with kinda similar claims but soon withdrew. Just be careful not to ever meet that guy, okay?"
"Hm. I still hope its just a rumor."

Turned out it was not a complete rumor after all. And now she was apparently the next victim. Does this scion guy also plan to make a recording like this? She wondered if Satoshi would be indifferent or angry if he ever saw a recording like... huh.

"Well well well. I think I know exactly how to torment him after three days."

 


 

"H-Have you lost your mind?!"

Gojima shouted as Sayuri just giggled.

"Ken kun... are you blushing?" She jumped on him and hugged him. "This is the first time I have seen you this flustered... how cute!"

"That's not the question here! This is the most risky and most absurd revenge plan I have ever heard and trust me, I have thought of ma—oh."

"Huh? You have what?"

"Oh, its nothing. Still, you are not doing it. Call your husband and tell him to shove his debt right up his ass right now! And you are not going to that rich guy's penthouse either!"

"Ken kun. If my plan works we can teach both of them—"

"You call that a plan? It has more holes in it than I have hairs on my chest! And I have a lot of it there!"

"I know. They feel really ticklish."

"Sayuri, please try to understand. This is not a viable plan."

Why not?

"Because—huh?"

"Ken kun?"

'Ubs?! What the hell are you saying?! You also heard her plan, right?! I should have known something was wrong when she suddenly called me to meet up in a love hotel and also bring a video camera!'

Yep, I heard her plan and I said, why not? It's a nice way to earn some extra AP, in fact, I can probably get you two of them if things work out well.

'And if things do not work out well?! What then?!'

Why won't they? Who do you think we are?

'Her plan relies on the fact that I can somehow get her out of there, the penthouse of a rich billionaire household. And the fact that the dude will be recording it! What are the odds of these things happening?!'

Well, quite low I guess—only if we do not manipulate things.

'And how do we manipulate things to our favor, huh?!'

Well, time to brush up your detective and dating modules. And your old avenger skills.

"Ken kun?"

"Huh?!"

Gojima gulped as she saw Sayuri take off her top and also drop her long skirt to reveal a really erotic lingerie.

"I... uh... I borrowed this from Misaki," she said while blushing, "...how do I look?"

"...You look really pretty."

"T-Thank you... hey, it's really embarrassing if I am the only one naked..."

Gojima took off his clothes in a trance. Sayuri bit her lips as she looked at his spear and put a towel on it.

"It's not the time for reveal yet. Can you please set up the camera and sit there?"

"You know, I am still not okay with it. But I will do one for your husband—only after making sure he cannot sue you for anything. No confirmation about the rich guy until I check out his place."

"As you wish, my lord."

Gojima sat down on the bed, with his dick covered with a white towel, making an rhythmically throbbing tent. Sayuri walked up to the camera, her heart pumping like crazy.

'Mama, your daughter is about to record a porn movie with her former neighbor to torment her husband. I wonder if you would be angry or proud.'

She felt nervous, but also... excited and horny to a point she had no idea she could reach.

Sayuri felt a string of liquid originate from her crotch, wetting her panty and dripping down her thigh. She hoped it was well visible in camera.

Now, time to shoot a movie.


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