Unwilling Eldritch Horror of Fortune

I woke up the next day feeling refreshed and ready to go. Setting up such a huge media gathering was all handled by my various aids and managers, and they were burdened with the task of making sure everything was good to go by 4 pm sharp. I arrived an hour prior and a huge crowd was already gathered, most were there to see me, but not an insignificant amount of bystanders were just curious about what all the commotion was about.

I took advantage of that time to check up on the location, ensuring that my plan should go without problem. I smiled when I saw my new friends looking around nervously by a large van, seemingly ready to rob the bank at the strike of 4. Of course, they didn’t recognize me today, with Noe’s Perception Shard mostly integrated, I could use it to manipulate those idiots’ points of view easily enough. There was nothing out of place, and with full Luck Charges at my disposal, I couldn’t imagine a world where things could go wrong.

I arrived at my podium just before the appointed time and started to address the media. I gave them a few moments to turn on the various cameras and other equipment before waving at the gathered crowd. If I timed this correctly, then the goons should start their little robbery just after I’ve finished my intro speech, and then the real show would go on.

Noe, amp up the Charisma, please.

“It is done, my Host.”

“Hello everyone watching,” I said with a kind smile and a humble wave, “I want to begin by thanking all of the various new media and independent journalists for taking the time out of their busy schedules to see me today.”

True to Noe’s words, my charm was working like, well, a charm. The cameramen and women blushed from the praise, while the various hosts and journalists all beamed with joy. Perfect.

I took some more time just sucking up to the crowd and the various media networks before continuing. “I know that many of you already know about my recent donations and charitable contributions, but today, I want to announce my biggest project yet.” I paused for dramatic effect, but more so because I needed to waste a few more seconds for my idiot criminals to get ready. “With the Olympics just around the corner, I thought that this was the perfect time to announce my new charity organization to help support impoverished kids around this beautiful country. Many children watch the biggest sporting event in the world, yet they never have the chance to participate in the same sports that they love, and I wish to remedy this issue immediately.”

Some small applause followed my first announcement, and I took that opportunity to take a quick glance to the Bank. My idiot new friends were already making their way into the venue. I should only have a few minutes more before they made a ruckus of themselves. I didn’t want to spend too much time bullshitting about some charity - well, technically I wasn’t bullshitting since I actually did plan to do what I promised - while I could be furthering my goals.

I smiled and continued. “I wish to take this opportunity to share information about some of the programs and ways that you can help as well, but first, I want to announce my own contributions. Starting today, I will pledge 10 million dollars, that is all of my earnings as a professional athlete in the past decade, to this charity!”

Now the cheers started to erupt in earnest. While people were photographing me and shouting various questions, my staff rolled in a huge screen that started to play prerecorded videos of the outreach program. It was the typical guff with kids of various ethnicities and ages playing sports, getting food and healthcare, and all that jazz. The media were eating it up, but inwardly I was wondering what was keeping the damned criminals. It was already a quarter past 4, and they should have gotten in immediately at 4. I honestly didn’t have anything else planned to say after this video played.

I had to suppress a frown as the last of the cheers faded and all of the attention was back on me. “Thank you, everyone,” I said with as much enthusiasm as I could while my brain worked on what else I could say to fill the time, “Thank you but allow me to explain why I have chosen to invest so much of my wealth into this country.”

I waited on another dramatic pause, this time a tad longer than necessarily needed. “As many of you may know, I was not born in the States, but in the short time that I have been here, this wonderful country has been nothing but-”

And there it was. Gunshots pierced the air, followed by the sounds of screaming and panic erupted as people immediately started to run in a frenzy. Some of the reporters who were more interested in a great story than their own safety began filing the disturbance, just as I hoped they would. I waited for just a moment for some cameras to land on me before I began to act.

Using more of Noe’s abilities, I immediately took control of the situation. “Please, calm down everyone! Panicking will only lead to more injuries! There seems to be a robbery at the bank, so please follow my staff and the officers to safety!”

I hopped off the raised platform and started to help with crowd control, guiding nervous families to safety as quickly as I could, all the while moving myself closer and closer to the action. Seeing the nice charitable athlete help out was one thing, and I was sure that I’d be in the news for that, but to truly capture the attention of the American people, I needed to do more. It was time to abuse Luck to my advantage.

The criminals, by this point, had realized that getting inside the bank with so many police present was impossible and were desperately trying to make their escape. Fear overrode reason and they were brandishing their pistols in the air while another few took hostages from within. Once the initial shock of the situation wore off and people soon realized that no more gunshots were heard, morbid curiosity took over and reporters, journalists, and Youtubers all rushed to get the best view of the action. The police were only marginally able to keep all of the people from swarming too close to the crime scene.

While all of this was happening, I was able to slip through all the way to the front of the people, and it only took me a single Luck Charge to accomplish.

“Don’t fucking move or we start offing people!” the lead robber screamed, waving his gun around like he was in a Hollywood blockbuster. I think it was the same guy I was speaking with yesterday, but I honestly forgot his face already, “We demand the money in the fucking bank and a secure spot for a helicopter to land once the money’s with us!”

The cops and the gathered crowd looked at them with confusion, clearly unsure about the guy’s mental health with that last statement. Ah, I guess they still remembered my promise from yesterday…

Unfortunately for the hostages, thinking that their captors were insane was not exactly conducive to keeping their emotions calm, and a few of them started to weep and shake in panic. This caused the armed men to become agitated, and we were all on bated breaths about what would happen next as the tension in the air neared eruption. Once the situation was well and truly heated up, I took the time to step in.

Luck Charges: 1540/1557

17 Luck Charges ensured I was at the center of attention, and more importantly, that everyone was calm and placated as that nothing drastic was done in the spur of the moment. I couldn’t have hostages dying when I was on camera, especially not when I was acting as Ashwin.

Luck Charges: 1531/1557

“Look, I know that nothing I say will convince you to step down, but I implore you to at least let me take the place of the hostages that you have,” I continued, this time ensuring that everything I said sounded as sincere and reasonable as possible, “If it’s money that you desire, then I am much more valuable as a hostage than any of the others.”

Some whispering occurred in the background between the various criminals. I couldn’t make out what they said between the ambient background noise, but I was sure that they didn’t forget about my second proposition to them yesterday. Here was the rich hostage offering himself up to them on a silver platter, there was no way that they wouldn’t take the bait, and sure enough, they didn’t.

“Fine,” the leader said and he trained his gun on me. I heard gasps from the people around me as they hurriedly ran away from the line of fire. “Come over here slowly, and we’ll let the others go.”

He signaled for the others to allow the men and women to back off once they saw that I was doing as instructed. I walked with deliberate slowness, every move and gesture that I made deliberately chosen to invoke a sense of selflessness and heroism, and of course, I made damned sure that every camera, cellphone, and recording device was pointed straight at me. Better yet, the thought that the robbers didn’t need to comply with their side of the agreement never even registered in their minds thanks to all those beautiful Charisma buffs I had.

My slow movement also gave law enforcement enough time to contain the area and finally move the reporters to a safe distance, which I was grateful for because the next part would get dangerous. It would also be mildly unpleasant for me.

The leader pulled me over, a little too rough for my liking, and started to bind my hands with a zip tie. He signaled for one of his other armed men to watch his back while he did so, which was the signal for me to enact the next part of the play. I looked over to the swaggering guy in the balaclava and waited for Noe to do her thing.

Luck Charges: 1516/1557

And there it was. A particularly rough gust of wind blew a dusty old newspaper right in the man’s face. Impossibly, it managed to get caught in the fabric of his mask, causing him to instinctively swipe at it with his hands, too bad that hand was the one that was holding his pistol. To the surprise of no one, the gun discharged a round, but instead of hitting his friend, which would not be the best possible outcome for what I had in mind, it slammed right into the side of my chest instead, just slightly to the right of my shoulders.

The pain wasn’t too bad, honestly, especially given all the shit I’ve had to endure over the past several months, but I had to play it up for the cameras. I winced, holding my wound tight as blood seeped into my white shirt, and fell to the floor. The only difficult part here was ensuring that the flow of blood didn’t stop after a few seconds thanks to just how sturdy the Ascended human form was, and let me tell you that it’s an awful feeling to have your life essence flow out of you without the adrenaline keeping the worst of it at bay. I stayed on the ground, weakly fumbling a bit, before “passing out”. The last thing I saw was the looks of sheer disbelief on the faces of my kidnappers, and I couldn’t help but grin a little.

That was when all hell broke loose, or at least that’s what I assume happened from the noise and shouts of rage. I didn’t dare peek at what was occurring with my Xollon anatomy, but the scene wasn’t too hard to imagine. After their only hostage was seemingly killed by accident, the criminals no longer had any bargaining chips left to play, and the fine police officers and SWAT members took care of the rest.

It didn’t take more than five or six minutes max for the entire situation to be contained after that, and I was whisked away in an ambulance while - and I hope this was the case - an army of reporters stood by to document the whole thing. If this stunt didn’t capture the attention of the American people, at least for the short term, then nothing would, because I needed Ashwin’s name to be widely known for the main act to begin.

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