Well at Least I’m a Magic Pirate Now

Sareneth 7 Fireday, Day 4

Once my mission log officially declared Jakes to be in the clear, I redeemed the mission without missing a beat. The seal of alternative payment had been pretty neat, so I was extremely curious about the Spellguard Bracers. When I pressed the “complete mission” button in my mind, a pair of dark blue, silver star studded wrist guards appeared in my hands. I started casting detect magic to identify those bad boys, but a helpful popup reminded me that casting a spell or making a skill check would end Keep Watch. That took the wind out of my sails enough for me to start thinking again. Shit. Where do I keep these?

The Wormwood was an enclosed area, and everyone had seen me for a few days and gotten used to how I looked without magical bracers. They were garish enough that I didn’t trust Autopilot’s ability to gaslight everyone on the subject, and if people started asking questions it could mean trouble. If I just claimed to have found them somewhere, it seemed likely that someone or other would claim them. They could have easily manufactured a story about losing them, or have bluntly asserted that anything laying around on the ship belonged to the captain anyway. They fit me so damn well, but I decided to hide them for the moment. I stowed them behind the unopened barrels of salt beef, which no one would be likely to disturb until the opened one was depleted. (Profession: Chef 17+2=19) I’d figure out some way to introduce them later. 

With that handled, I checked on Owlbear and found him sleeping peacefully. I let him stay that way. I wasn’t worried about him being tired the next day, as he didn’t seem to do much, but I still didn’t want to disturb him. If he freaked out in the dark and lashed out at me, I might get seriously injured. I retreated to the galley, padding silently on bare feet. 

I spent around an hour reading the cookbook, finding the pork belly recipe Kroop made that day. He’d shown me how to do it, so I used that knowledge to learn how to read the cookbook, reading each step and comparing it to my memory of what he’d done. Simply put, I wasn’t literate when it came to cooking terminology yet, and I needed a source of knowledge that wasn’t known to get blackout drunk occasionally. I puttered around the kitchen, killing time through scraps of cleaning, tidying, reading, and dozing. It’s nice having the extra time to clear my head, but there isn’t all that much to do. I can cast this on other people, right? Some company would be nice. 

My mission for the day was something of a bust. I genuinely didn’t know if I could do it or not; I just didn’t have enough information. 

Save Lady Sosima Aulamaxa from Bonewrack Isle

Reward: 2 Experience, Royal Pardon

Who the fuck is Sosima Aulamaxa? Where the fuck is Bonewrack Isle? I mean, if she’s some kind of noblewoman it would probably be good for me to save her if I can. Nobles pay their heroic rescuers well, right? Of course, the real problem was that I lacked the context to know how much they were asking. My only hint was the 2 experience point reward placing it somewhere between nailing a job interview and assassinating a man twice my size surrounded by bodyguards. If Lady Aulamaxa was in a tower guarded by a dragon, I’d probably pass. If she was literally just stuck in a tree or something, I’d probably do it for free. I also had no idea where Bonewrack Island was. (Knowledge (Geography): 16+2=18) What he said! 

I couldn’t do anything about it for now, but I wasn’t going to put it back into the shuffle yet. Just in case the first thing Kroop says to me in the morning is “Oh hey Emrys, get ready. We’re making port in Bonewrack Isle City. Nice place except for the princess kidnapping but easily defeated goblins.” I didn’t know if this was like the Jakes quest, where it appeared in my log right as it became relevant, but I didn’t want to risk it. Since I was on the subject, I looked up the reward to see what was on the line. 

Royal Pardon

Strong Enchantment 

When opening this luxurious vellum envelope, the user may choose a single category of actions, from the categories of assault, coercion, theft, destruction of property, or sexual misconduct. All past actions within that category will be forgiven and any legal charges will be dropped. Directly injured parties may roll a will save to instead have their disposition towards the user improved by one step, to a maximum of neutral. This has no impact on future misdeeds. After the pardon is used, it crumbles away into worthless ash.

I don’t need that right now, but it’s one hell of a get out of jail free card. 

••••••••••

In the morning, I proceeded to fall into what was slowly becoming my routine. I helped Kroop pass out biscuits in the morning, supplemented with soup for the officers. We milked the two female goats, gathered the eggs, and checked the stores for tampering. After the routine part, Kroop and I started fishing in the light rain. “We’re close enough to the shore that we might actually catch something today, and it’s always good to stretch the fresh meat when you can.” Kroop said as he pulled out the heavy rods. 

The equipment was a bit more primitive than any I’d used before, but I had gone fishing before then. In lakes, at least. I’m sure it’s similar enough. I let autopilot handle the small stuff while I picked Kroop’s brain for information. I’ve been here a few days and I don’t really know anything. “So. Where are we going? I assume the ship isn’t just wandering randomly?”

“Nah. We’re headed down south to the shipping lanes, out of Shackles waters. The captain’s hoping to catch a few ships alone for a quick pay day. After that disaster in Cheliax he needs a win.” Autopilot, any chance you can make me look like I’m remotely informed? The Shackles is a confederation of islands ruled by pirate lords. You live there. (9+2=11) Cheliax is a powerful empire to the north. They employ pact magic with devils and other otherworldly beings, and have been at war with the Shackles since the Pirate Council formed. (17+2=19) Awesome. Thanks. 

“What happened in Cheliax?” I asked, figuring I wouldn’t get a better chance to not look stupid. 

“The Cap’n tried raiding their coast. I think he was making a bid for pirate king, trying to show off. It didn’t go well. About a third of the fleet were killed or captured, probably enslaved knowing the Chels. The rest saw which way the wind was blowing and scattered.” Kroop’s voice grew distant as he spoke, “It was a bad time. We had to abandon the Knife in the Gut on the shores of Rahadoum and flee overland; no way we could have gotten back out through the Arch. The officers on this ship are some of the only people that still trusted… ” he looked around, remembering he was in public. Harrigan was staring right at us from halfway across the ship, and he wasn’t smiling. “That stayed loyal after that.” Kroop Backpedaled, “So he pulled one of his other ships out of retirement and started recruiting people like you.” The captain went back to his work with a curt nod.

I let the matter lie, focusing on Autopilot’s surprisingly flawless technique. Only a few minutes after the conversation died my line grew tight and I jerked towards the back of the ship. I slowly let the fish exhaust itself as Kroop moved to support me, slowly letting the line out and reeling it in when it went slack. I didn’t actually know what I was doing, but my guesses seemed to be working out. (Survival 20+1= Critical Success. 20+1= Critical Success. 17+1= 18, Success) Autopilot shocked me, Kroop, and the entire crew on deck by hauling a 4 foot long tuna out of the ocean after less than an hour of fishing. When the massive fish landed on the deck, the crew dropped all pretense that they were working and struck up a cheer, led by Syl. In the struggle, my puny 8 strength, 10 constitution body had taken a beating. Well that was random. 

Thankfully, I got a chance to rest  while Kroop prepared the fish. “After that, we’re changing the plan.” Kroop informed me, “Captain’s going to want some of this beauty on his plate tonight.”

I watched halfheartedly. I wasn’t looking forward to the day I had to actually assist in butchering an animal. When he was done packing up the bones and head to make broth and the fillets for the officers, I asked him another question. “This may sound weird, but do you know about a place called Bonewrack Isle?” 

He glanced at me with confusion. “Tiny island down south in the middle of nowhere. It’s full of ghouls and fuckall else. Why?” South? So we are going in the right direction. Great. 

“No real reason. I’ve just heard about it somewhere. Will we be going anywhere near it?” Gods I am so smooth. 

“We’ll be in the area in about a week, but probably not landing there, thankfully. Ghouls are bad news, lad. The captain wouldn’t be in much danger but a pack of those will tear a normal man apart.” Ghouls are undead, probably stronger than a basic zombie. (Religion 4+2=6) 

So… not an easy mission. Damn. I wonder why it’s even in my mission log? It’s in a remote location, guarded by super zombies, I’m nowhere near it, and it’s not like I have any influence over where we go. I really doubt Syl and I can pull it off alone at level one, either. I dismissed the mission, hoping that I’d get more relatively easy ones before I had to start heroically saving random women. I’ll keep it if it comes up again when I’m anywhere near the objective. Stay safe, Sosima, whoever the fuck you are. You’re possibly on my to-do list. 

The next part of my day was a bit less pleasant. While I was helping Kroop prepare the tuna, a pair of burly men barged into the galley and grabbed me. “So,” Scourge said smoothly as he stepped in behind them, “I noticed ye seemed very concerned about Mr. Magpie’s health. Ye wouldn’t happen to have seen anything odd about him?” He held up a long scrap of stained cloth. “A poultice made of spices from here in the Galley, perhaps?”

“I didn’t see anything. Last I saw he had that oozing rash.” I let my magic flow from my mouth, lacing my words with subtle influence. “Honestly I expected he’d be dead by now.” (Opposed Bluff check: 18+13=31 vs distrustful target sense motive 8+6+5=19) Scourge glared at me for a few moments before sighing. “Dammit. Wrong guy. He doesn’t know anything, let him go.” Just like that, the situation was diffused and the three men filed out without so much as a “sorry.” 

“You alright lad? That could have gone badly.” Kroop remarked while he brushed me off. “You’re lucky he was feeling merciful. Half the time he’ll beat someone just to make an example. Chelish style, you know? The example is more important than punishing the right guy.” 

Good to know. Even a perfectly innocent chap like me could have been cruelly punished. 

When the day was done and I was given leave, I ate dinner with the conscripts and we chatted about our day. “Damn impressive angling by the way.” Rosie commented, “I saw it from the crows nest. It’s a good thing nothing was on the horizon or I’d have missed it.” 

“Oi! Emrys!” I whipped my head around when I heard Caulky calling my name from the stairwell. “Captain’s got something for you!” I stood up and she strode over to me before pressing a rock into my hand. “He says thanks for the fish.” 

The rest of the crew looked over at me with mild interest, though they mostly went back to their revelry before long. You did something impressive in front of the whole crew. The captain wanted to publicly recognize that to encourage heroics. (Sense motive 16+1=17) 

Okay, but a rock? It’s a cut hematite worth 10 gold to a jeweler, and much lighter to carry around than gold coins. (Appraise 16+2=18) Oh. Fair

“Caught the captain’s eye, I see.” Sandara said, clapping me on the back and plucking my prize from my hand. “Hmm. Not bad for a present from a skinflint like Harrigan, and not bad for a landlubber.” (Sandara is impressed. You have gained one point of influence. You now have minor sway with Sandara.) 

She smiled at me out of the corner of her eye. “Are you lookin to make any bets? I bet this could fetch two, maybe three gold from a jeweler.” 

On impulse, I charmed her as a plan formed in my head. Her hundred watt smile grew as I made my proposal. “Actually, if you meet me in the kitchen after everyone’s asleep, there’s something I’d like to talk to you about.” 

“Oh?” She crooned, “I’m sure that will be interesting.” There was a playful glint in her eyes as she spoke. 

(Secret will save, difficulty 15. 13+4=17. Success! The target is not charmed)

(Secret opposed bluff vs Sense motive 11+8=19 vs. 18+5=23. Failure! The target is aware of attempted mental influence.)