Young Flame

A week passed since I escaped the crevice and all that was left from the area around the Cavern Pass. It has taken until now for me to find a path up the cliff. It is narrow and steep, and my missing leg makes it far more difficult than it should be to scale. I hold the pseudo spear in both hands and lodge it into the stone underfoot so I can hop with some level of stability. With the energy of my inner flame dipping so low, there is a very low chance I will survive another long fall. Honestly, I should feel lucky I got away having lost only a leg.

I hoped my leg would be quick to heal, but there has been no regrowth. The blackened stump has cracked, showing the red glow underneath. Soon, the coal-like black coating will peel off and free my leg to the air once again, but the limb still has a long time to recover.

I struggle to stumble my way along the path that zigzags its way up the tall bluff. It is small, barely my shoulder width in most places, but it is flat enough that I can get a good enough purchase with my stick to keep me moving.

No rain has come since my time in the chasm. Thank Eldest Ember. But I know there is no guarantee that it will stay that way, so I move as fast as my one-legged hobble will let me.

Making it to the top of the cliff, I look down at the land a few hundred metres below. The ground is so far away; it is hard to imagine that I am so high up. The lingering image of the Titan returns to my mind. No matter how tall this cliff is, that thing had been far greater.

Trying to rid my mind of the horrid being, I sweep my gaze to the horizon. The distant ocean is a darker reflection of the sky above. The blue of it is such a charming colour, so different from the oranges and browns that tinge the rest of the world. It is incredible how such a beautiful thing as the ocean is so horrendously deadly.

To the east, the ocean closes in much closer to the cliffs than here. It is a good thing I was able to find this path when I did. If the east is blocked off, then I don’t know how I would have gotten out of the coast.

Checking my bag of coal, there is only a little left. I’ve tried to ration how much I eat, but my inner flame is gluttonous, never sated until I regain the energy I am comfortable with. At most, I expect the coal to last a couple of days. If everything goes well, I’ll find my tribe waiting for me at the exit of the cavern pass, and then everything will be alright again. I just have to make sure I get there in one piece.

Without needing to constantly look for a path to follow and having become accustomed to walking with the aid of my walking stick, I make it back to Cavern Pass in only three days. The cracks in the landscape are clear as I close in on it, but it is the sight of the still-flowing lava river in the distance that confirms where I am.

Newly created chasms and ravines litter the landscape, more so than at the base of the cliffs. The large tears in the ground left the area difficult to navigate. I struggle to find a proper path to the opening of the cave system. Frustratingly, I have to backtrack each time I reach a dead end, which delays my reunion with everyone.

I recognise the cavern exit the moment my eyes land on it. It looks almost the same as I last saw it. Minimal damage to the exterior of the tunnel keeps it in much the same state, especially compared with the surroundings. Excited to reunite with my family, I rush as fast as my tottering single-legged walk allows me.

Nobody is waiting.

Not Uncle. Not Auntie.

Nobody.

I search inside the opening, but it doesn’t lead anywhere. There has been a cave-in near the entrance. I can’t even find evidence my tribe was here. Neither indications of gers having been set up nor wagon trails.

My inner flame churns with dread. Did they not make it out? I feel the hard pull of anxiety tugging at my soul. No! They are still alive. They have to be. It’s been two weeks since we were separated, maybe they found a place on more stable ground. Or maybe they thought I died. I don’t want to consider the idea that they haven’t looked for me, we might have even missed each other in our search. There’s not going to be a clear sign of them, anyway. I saw where our carts ended up. Without our wagons, they won’t have any ger to set up. Most likely, they’ll be travelling almost as bare as I am.

The most likely direction they would have taken if they thought I died would be north, as we initially intended. I might find them if I travel that way. I don’t know the exact direction of where we were heading, and I don’t have a map for guidance even if I knew, but hopefully, I will find something if I look. If they do think I am dead, I should be able to spot the smoke of the pyre and find them that way. With no other ideas, it is best I leave as soon as possible, I don’t want to fall any further behind than I already am.

Before I leave on my journey north, I need to leave a mark to let them know I was here and am still alive should they return. I line a collection of rocks in a straight line pointing north. If they come back, they’ll easily be able to tell where I went.

So, I hold on to the thin glimmer of a chance everything will be okay and begin my stumble north.

❖❖❖

I’ve found nothing.

I’m hungry, my stupid leg is still gone, and I haven’t found a trace of my tribe. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do anymore. It's been weeks since I left the cliffs and I’ve found nothing but the empty desert.

I now spend most of my days angling. Without my coal, I’ve had to resort to eating only sand-worms. As tasty as they are, they’re hardly nourishing. I have to stop almost every thirty minutes to keep my hunger at bay. This cuts into my already slow walking speed. Now I can hardly travel any distance each day.

My leg hasn’t regenerated at all. Without a proper source of sustenance, I doubt it’ll start anytime soon. The nutrition-starved worms are barely enough to keep me moving. How did Auntie Kay regrow her finger in only a couple of days? I wish it were that quick for me.

The lack of progress I’ve achieved is wearing down on me. I was hoping for at least some confirmation somewhere that will help me believe everyone is alive. My nights have been getting restless too. Being unable to get much sleep during the night makes it even harder for me to travel far during the day.

The thought that I had been wrong and that maybe everyone is dead from the collapse of the tunnel keeps entering my mind. I crush it any time it enters my head. I am not about to even consider the possibility. What do I have left if the rest of my tribe is gone? I have already lost so much with the death of my mum, what will I have to live for if I am alone forever?

No. They have to be alive. I won’t accept any other world than the one in which they are alive. I have to find them, wherever they went.

So, I keep moving. Eating enough sand-worms to keep my body trudging along. Trying to find any sign of a path is futile, as the sands cover any possible remnants left behind. But still, I try. I aimlessly travel north, sometimes straying east, sometimes west.

The longer I travel, the less focused my thoughts become. The repetitive movements day after day are the only concerning matter my mind attaches to. My focus drifts, barely keeping a grip on my form. Only the ingrained memories from my family stop me from bursting into flames.

I don’t know how many days pass. The landscape never changes. All I know is the same desert I have always known. It’s possible I’ve hardly moved, my faltering hop of a walk slowing me down more than I’d thought. The only thing I know, and know for certain, is that I am not wandering in circles. The moon remains in the same position as always.

What am I even doing anymore? It is obvious I am alone. My tribe is all gone, they aren’t coming back, and they aren’t coming for me.

Uncle’s comforting care as he Kindled my inner flame. Auntie’s teasing smirk as she dodged my spear swings with ease. Even Poppy’s old games before Mummy was gone.

Mummy’s warm, loving hugs.

I can’t help but remember them all. I can’t help but grieve that I will never experience those moments with them again. They are all gone, and I am all alone.

I continue stumbling along. I don’t have a reason to keep going, but stopping means death. Even if the thought of giving up calls for me, I can’t do it. I am terrified of dying, so I just keep pushing. I keep moving through the pain, using physical exhaustion to hide from my despair.

❖❖❖

Incredible pain assaults my mouth, snapping my consciousness out of the repetition for the first time in an eternity. I let out a scream as steam billows from the front of my face. My mentally drained thoughts barely connect it to the pain inflicted on my tongue.

It takes me much longer than it should have to notice the arguing happening above me.

“… absolute buffoon! How could you have given an áed water? Are you trying to kill the girl?”

“Oh shove it, you didn’t know either. Besides, this is the first I’ve seen one.”

I try to raise my head to see who these two voices belong to. I’m immediately disappointed at the sight of them, they aren’t my tribe. Instead, they are towering creatures, triple my height and wider than I am tall.

My mouth still burns, and I can’t close my jaw.

“Fuck me, Barrett. You’ve ruined that tongue of hers,” exclaims one of the two giants above me. He bends over me where I can get a better look at him. Thick fur covers him, like the dingoes or foxes we sometimes hunt, even his face is veiled in it. His fur is a dark brown rather than the common lighter colours I am used to.

It is difficult to discern the man's neck, if he has one at all, as his wide and fat head seems to blend seamlessly into his torso. Similarly, his arms are wider than my entire body.

Unsure who or what I am looking at, I attempt to greet him. ‘Attempt’ being the key word. Not only do I hardly make a gurgle of noise, but the burning sensation in my tongue intensifies at the attempt.

“Sorry girly, my friend's a bit of a moron. Here, try this, it’s dried fruit and meat. You think you can eat some o’ this?” the man leaning over me offers me some weird multicoloured rock.

Unsure, I give a hesitant nod. He breaks a bit of the rock into small pieces. My arms feel heavy, but I push myself into a sitting position and take some of the offered food. He is quite intimidating; my hand is scarcely the size of his finger and the portion of the bar he gives me is deceptively large. The large rock fits easily in his hand, while the small part he gives me is nearly too large to hold.

The dried meat and fruits are rather tasteless, or is that because my tongue is numb? Either way, I feel more energy run through me from the strange food than quite a few sand-worms would give me.

Looking around myself, I notice the man who must have forced water on me, Barrett, has walked off and is now talking with a third man. Both other men look remarkably similar, it is hard to make out many differences between them. The height and colouration of their fur are the only differences between them, and even those differences are insignificant. It might be difficult to tell them apart.

Observing myself, I notice my clothes are almost in tatters, almost completely threadbare. My leg still hasn’t recovered. It hasn’t even grown in the slightest, although the charcoal-like stub has returned to the same colour as the rest of my skin.

“So, what’s a young áed doing without her tribe, huh?” the man above me says.

I don’t want to think about my tribe, I know now that there is little chance any of them survived. I’ve only survived myself because I hadn’t been crushed. My eyes fall to my missing leg. Well, not completely crushed.

I still feel empty from their loss. The more I think about them, the bleaker my future seems. I don’t know what I’m going to do without them. While I’ve been wandering in my absent mental state, I was unable to parse what I was doing. I kept moving with no plan, no logic, and no thought towards what I was doing and where I was going. It started with a search for my tribe and devolved into a mindless march as I tried to refuse the world.

Unable to talk with the state of my mouth, I indicate towards my leg, trying to show I had lost them like I lost my leg.

He misunderstood.

“Oh? They cut your leg and left you to die? How barbaric. What truly savage people.” He says.

I’m dumbfounded at this misunderstanding. How is that the first thing your mind jumps to? Angry and irritated at the slander of my family, I punch his leg, hitting slightly above the ankle.

He doesn’t even notice it, or if he does, he doesn’t react. Instead, he just chuckles into the air and stands straight, once again intimidating me with his size.

“Ha. You are with us now; we’ll make sure to take good care of you. Unlike those primitive áed, we have proper civilisation. I’m sure you’ll love it once you see it.”

I can’t believe it. Not only has he made a stupidly incorrect assumption, but he’s blatantly insulting my recently departed family. If he wasn’t so big, I’d burn his fur off.

“Arthur, stop talking nonsense, have a look at her. That’s obviously not what happened.” The third man says to the man above me, before turning his attention to me.

“Little miss, I’m sorry for what happened to your family. I can only give my good wishes for their prosperity in Rod’s Domain.”

I nod to him, thankful for not making the same false assumption. Rod’s Domain? What is that? I hope he isn’t talking about the Eternal Inferno. The thought of someone trying to take ownership of the great flame sounds horrifyingly dangerous. Hopefully the Eternal Inferno remains as apathetic as ever, for this Rod’s sake.

“Despite his rudeness, Arthur’s offer was made in good conscience. Unless you have somewhere to go, we would be willing to take you to our city and make sure you have enough to eat there.”

I’m hesitant to take his offer, they are strangers after all. But I consider it. It’s not like I know what to do with myself out here by myself, anyway. If left to my own devices, I would follow the same monotonous life that I have been. Consuming sand-worms and crawling my way across the wasteland.

Maybe I’d reach The Agglomerate one day, though it's more likely I'll be dead long before I find it.

But even if I have nothing to lose by following them, I’m hesitant to trust them. The only other sentient races our tribe has come into contact with have never had particularly peaceful resolutions.

Probably picking up on my hesitance, the giant speaks again.

“You don’t have to choose to stay with us now, it’ll be a few weeks of travel to Raetamen from here anyway, then only a small trip to the city of Fisross. Come with us and you can leave if you decide you don’t want to stay with us. In the meantime, I think introductions are overdue.” He says before straightening himself up.

“I am Gerben and these two are Arthur and Barrett. We can wait until your mouth is healed before you can introduce yourself. Barrett is sorry about that, aren’t you?” He directs his words to the man who somehow mistakenly tried to get me to eat water. The thought is odd to me, how can you make such an unreasonable mistake?

“Yeah sorry kid, If I had known I would never have brought water even close to ya. It’s too bad the only person who had actually met an áed before didn’t think to mention it.” He says, glaring daggers at Arthur.

Quick to defend himself, Arthur jumps in. “Oh, don’t try to piss your mistake off on me, you should’ve known better that one with hair like that couldn’t possibly be albanic.”

“If it was so obvious, then why didn’t you stop me? We both know you’re full of shit. No wonder your missus left ya, with you always prattling on with your narcissistic lies.” Barrett responds. His words seem to anger Arthur as he gets right in Barrett’s face. Seeing the rage on such an intimidating person makes me instinctively back away.

“That bitch didn’t break up with me. I caught her riding another fucker behind my back. You’ve got some fucking balls to…” Arthur’s tirade is interrupted by a loud cough from Gerben.

“Boys, as much as I love seeing you two go at it, we do have a guest. Would you act the same way in front of your own daughter or younger sister?”

They both seem to acquiesce to his intervention after glancing at me. Both men shove each other but otherwise don’t act on their aggression.

My shoulders sag in relief. The last thing I want is to be stuck in the fight between two giants who can flatten me with a thought.