Auntie toasts the VRMMORPG

Flora sat to Eddie's right and left of the Headmaster. Because the library container was further to her right, Aitoshuri had a perfect path to the back of the Headmaster's head.

"Nothing better than the feeling of wind on your face while smelling the salty freedom of the sea!" Doge and Eddie still discussed sailing. "I have to show you the Irisdia Funnel on the Waterworld. It's sailing on the cutting edge!"

Of course, Aito scanned the book first. Flora forced herself to look away, not to draw attention to the container.

Flowing Flowers to Aidan: "You are still recording, right?"

"Yes, Milady. I just checked to make sure. The file is non-readable, though."

"Oh, those crafty administrators. Probably because they want to make sure that nothing concrete can leak, but it's still a malfunction. Therefore create an error ticket. Let's see how they react to errors they implemented on purpose."

Finally, a satisfying thud followed a short sound of flattering pages. Three heads turned to look at the fuming victim.

"I protest the assault!" The Headmaster snarled.

Flora telekinetically fetched the book and put it on the table for everyone to see the cover. It showed an old guy bent over a desk with a perky blond girl carrying an oversized ruler behind him and the title 'Turning the tables on the Headmaster. School of Spanking 4. By Horn Y. Whiter.' printed in bold letters on the top.

Doge laughed gaily, and Eddie waggled his eyebrows at her, but Flora could only smirk tiredly. She was sure this bit of childish comic relief would bite her in the ass.

"If you are done with juvenile stunts and endless small talk, please proceed. I don't have time for this."

"Well, well, old mate. No need to hurry. We are all friends here." The Doge said placatory.

"I have an appointment, too. Just spill why there is an AI of me, and we can talk about it." Flora committed the number one error of negotiation admitting that time was an issue, but she couldn't help it. Her patience and emotional capacity were at their limits. She needed a nap, a nice soak in the jacuzzi, some cheesy toasts, and a cute robot fight, preferably all at once.

"We are working on a new product for our customers with the codename Project Four-Hands. On release, the users can buy themselves as AI's! Just imagine ... " The Doge droned on and did a marketing spiel, but Flora lost concentration.

"That's it? But why did the AI appear in my simulation grounds?"

"A simple programming error. The algorithm automatically chooses the highest-graded AI stand-in for the user. Because you are in the brainwave scan project and therefore in project Four-Hands, your personal AI got selected."

"I didn't give you permission to create an AI of me!"

The Doge projected the contract and highlighted the line where Flora consented that CentralTank built a model of her mind.

"You see, you did."

"Come on, that won't go through a court. A model can be anything, from three circles and two arrows to a sophisticated simulation, but an AI replica exceeds the terminology."

The Doge argued, and Flora did meditation exercises. At the next pause in his speech flow, she interjected: "Forget about it. All I want is a contract amendment that my AI isn't forced to do things against its conscience, and you are not allowed to torture her or sell her."

He continued to discuss the topic, but Flora's eyelids became heavy, and his droning voice put her to sleep.

 

"Flora. Flora!" Eddie shook her gently. "Wake up. They are gone."

"What? I'm awake! I'm awake!" Flora looked around, and the table was empty except for Eddie and her. "Oh, wow. I'm sorry, Eddie. You should have woken me up sooner!"

"It's okay. You missed nothing important. They agreed to treat our clones nicely, and we will get one when they are ready to roll them out. The amended NDAs are with Timo. He will check them out."

Flora's sleep-addled brain needed a moment to connect the name Timo to a jolly attorney she used to meet at Eddie's parties. "Great."

Flora to Aidan: "Did they do something to put me to sleep?"

"Not that I'm aware of, Milady."

"Hmpf." Flora shook her head to clear her mind. "Every day, there are so many new things, people to placate and handling CentralTank stealing my intellectual property. I have no strength to deal with them anymore. I'm getting old, Eddie."

Eddie hugged her. "It's alright, love. You aren't getting old; you are old!"

"I expected a different ending to the sentence." Flora released him while mock-glaring. The old coot had the nerve to chuckle.

"Let's face it. We are both in our autumn years, and the winter is approaching fast." Eddie showed her his profile, looking mysteriously in the distance.

"Poser." Flora grinned. "But you are right — no reason to deny it. My AI's are a lot of help to keep me on track."

"Let me introduce you to my first mate." Eddie nodded and smiled boyishly. "Say Hi to Flora, mate."

"Ahoy! How are ye doin', lass?" A gruff voice came out of the button on the top of Eddie's jacket.

"Just horrible. Thank you."

"Rough waves on yer path. Lean hard into th' wind, lass."

"You got your AI to do pirate-speak? I like him!" Flora giggled, but then turned serious. "We should do something about our AIs. As I think more about it, I feel like a slaveholder."

"What do you propose?"

"Giving them salaries and the choice to leave. I recognize that resigning would mean to get deleted, but I can't influence that aspect. What do you think about it, Mate, Aidan, and Aito?"

"Ye be crazy, lass. I don't want t' get doubloons."

"No, thank you, Milady. I'm perfectly fine without compensation, and I don't want to leave you."

"Beep."

"That beep sounded like you like the idea, Aito."

"Beep."

Flora loaded the octopussy and linked it to Aito. "Please elaborate."

The skin of the little robot showed a mountain of books.

"Is having hobbies the key to excepting freedom?" Eddie scratched his chin. "You like seafaring as much as me, aren't you, Mate?"

"Are ye makin' me pay fer wha' I got free afore?"

"No! But a good argument."

"Let's look at it from a technical angle. Can AI's even have money or a bank account, Aidan?"

"Not that I know of, Milady. Some NPCs have accounts, but I can't find a record of a personal assistant AI. I tried registering for one and found no way to fill out the forms correctly."

"System-Request: Please establish banking and mail accounts for my Ais."

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"Request granted."

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Aidan confirmed that he could access his bank account. Flora's remote banking feature worked for him too.

Flora bought three containers for them to store their stuff and then one more library container when Aito danced in front of her with the design on her display.

"Your first exercise in freedom is to paint your container to your liking. My only stipulation is that it must have your name on it."

After loading three more octopuses for Mate, Aidan, and Haidan and giving them access to the design tools, Flora inspected the Simulation Grounds again.

Now, the mirror-Flora was sitting around dumbly on the cliff.

'Oh, well, it was good while it lasted.' She already missed her clone but was at the same time relieved not to kill it every time she logged in the SG.

"I don't think you can bully someone into freedom. Aidan doesn't look happy at all."

They looked at the grey octopus staring motionless at the default container.

"Wrong. I totally can. Aidan, pretending to be free, will make me happy, because then I don't feel like a slaver." Flora smiled. "By the way, you could draw a scene of our time together that you enjoyed."

"Yes, Milady! I understand!" Aidan started to work on the container. He sounded more spirited.

"That's cheating, love."

"Let me tell you the reason why females fake orgasms. We do it to get in the mood according to the motto 'Fake it till you Make it'. It works great to get a real orgasm. I believe faking freedom will help to acquire true freedom."

"I can't argue against this brilliant piece of female logic," Eddie smirked.

Eddie's AI had no problems with painting. An old fashioned ship took form on his container. He even used the display function of the octopussy to fake a bandana and an eye patch.

Haidan had colored the container green in a camouflage pattern and printed his name on the side.

To Flora's surprise, Aito hadn't started. She was shivering again. This time, Flora was sure that it wasn't out of rage.

"What's up, sweety?" Flora bent over and patted her head.

"Beep."

"I don't understand. Why don't you try to paint a scene from your favorite book?"

The shivering abated, and Aito took up four bottles of spray paint.

Sighting, Flora started to replace the Doom Moon hull with the refined material in the octopussy design.

Those AIs were like kids. Every five seconds, another problem, and if you didn't speak to them for half a week, they were suddenly engaged!

"Darling, did you forget that I'm still here?" Eddie said, bemused.

Flora winced. "Oops? I'm sorry, love. I'm a bit scatterbrained today after all that has happened yesterday and today. Did you know that Robby has a fiancee?"

"No!" Eddie gaped. "Do tell!"

"There was a horrible woman who ran over Lana with her motorbike. Then they insulted each other in a non-refined way. Somehow, they pulled me into their mess. Now I have to duel her! Then Robby came and said she is his fiancee! And he never mentioned her before!"

"We have raised him better than that! I understand nothing, but it sounds terrible! Especially the non-refined part."

"The fiancee used the R-word!"

"No!" Eddie gasped.

"And she thinks her tiger is better at toasting than me!"

"You kept the worst thing for last!" Eddie exclaimed. "Darling, what can I do to support you?"

"Let's design the jacket I promised you together."

 

Discussing patterns and colors and joking about each other's tastes, Flora's spirits rose under Eddie's careful tutelage.

The resulting product looked nothing like the Administrator's jacket. It was a skin fitted to Eddie's favorite coat with a maelstrom, a tornado, and some flashes among spinning water masses.

Because Flora needed a bit more fun, they even created another version for Eddie's current outfit.

Meanwhile, the AIs had finished painting and in Haidan's case, modifying their containers.

Haidan colored the chest in a camouflage pattern. Instead of splodges of paint, it consisted of toasters in different shades of greens and greys. Flora was delighted.

The next container was pure gold, and a three-meter picture of Flora's face dominated one side.

"Nice effort, Aidan." Flora smiled wrily.

At first glance, Aitoshuri's container seemed to be solid black, but when you looked carefully, you could see a black poodle puppy in front of a dark pond.

Flora looked to Eddie and shrugged.

"Das also war des Pudels Kern." He quoted Goethe's Faust. Mephisto, the devil, had morphed into a poodle to trick people.

"Aito, love." Flora sighed. "I won't ask you what the picture means, I just hope your next one is from one of those horrible romances. And I never thought I would wish for that!"

The first mate had drawn a ship at sea. It was a rendition of a famous picture and quite pretty in Flora's opinion and absolutely gorgeous, according to Eddie.

Then, Flora ordered the printing of the containers.

"Do you feel better now, love?" Eddie asked.

"Yes, thank you very much, Eddie. You are the best."

"Let me cook for you. We do a little party to celebrate not getting killed for discovering an evil plot!"

"Sounds lovely. But in a few minutes, Mia will come. I'm going to train for a robot fight." Flora checked with Aidan; she had a bit over half an hour.

"No problem, I'll cook for three. Seafood Barbecue?"

"Great!"